The following letter of the Rebbe is being publicly published for the first time, courtesy of Rabbi Sholom Mendel Simpson, the Rebbe’s secretary, in honor of the 20th anniversary of Gimmel Tammuz 5754. The collection of Igros Kodesh given to Rabbi Simpson will be printed in the near future.
By the Grace of G-d
8 Cheshvan, 5713
Brooklyn 13, New York
Blessing and Greetings:
I have duly received your letter, but due to the intervention of the month of Tishrei and all the festivals in it, I was unable to reply to it sooner. In the meantime you have no doubt received my good wishes for the New Year.
Referring to your letter and various questions and problems about which you write, I want to dwell on item 6 of your letter which contains the key to all your other problems. In this paragraph you mentioned that you feel depressed and cannot see any reasons for a brighter future. You ask how you can really get rid of your fears.
The answer is comparatively simple. When a person will reflect, in a logical way about the creation and the order and precision and laws that are to be found in nature, the conclusion must be inescapable. There is a tremendous system of order in the universe, and strict laws, and, therefore there can be no doubt that the world is regulated by plan, order and purpose.
The very fact that there is order, purpose and law in the universe, must lead one to the conviction that all this is good, since evil is the opposite of order and system, and is associated with chaos.
No matter how much importance a person attaches to ones own self and ones own problems, he must recognize that if there is such order in such a complicated universe, how much easier it is to bring about law and order in ones own small universe – a thought which should lead to satisfaction and peace of mind.
If there are people who complicate their lives, it is because people have free choice of action and mind. But this very fact of the human-being having a free will is a part of the entire system of goodness and purpose in the world, for it was G-d’s design that the human-being should not be an automaton but should be able, freely, to choose eternal life and goodness.
If we consider all the above, we must come to the firm conviction that if man would not upset his own life through circumstances depending upon his free will, he would inevitably come to the good. Even if, temporarily, one finds ones self in an unpleasant or painful situation, it is surely infinitely insignificant by comparison to all the good that will result from it.
By way of illustration: If you see a person working at a job for somebody else, it would seem at first glance that the employer is exploiting the knowledge, experience and energy of the employee, and that the employee seemingly has no immediate benefit from his toil. To him who is unaware that at the end of the week the working will receive his pay envelope, it would seem the height of cruelty and injustice to exploit another human-being in this fashion. But come pay day at the end of the week, the worker will receive full compensation for his sweat and toil, which will enable him to support himself, his wife and family. It will then be clear that not only is there no injustice or cruelty in such work, but that the work is amply compensated.
Similarly in ones personal life. If it seems to one that there appears to be no purpose in his personal life and that there seems to be, rather, more pain than pleasure in it, it is only because one cannot foresee the future and the results of the circumstances which have caused such pain or exertion.
However, the firm faith and knowledge that the Almighty is Master of the universe, and that every human-being is but a small part of it, and, therefore, the Almighty is Master also of the personal life of each human being with all that happens in it, also gives the certain knowledge that no matter how ones life is shaped, there must be justice in it and each human-being will, sooner or later, depending upon his merit and energy, eventually see that that is so.
In the light of the above, you may be quite certain that there is a good answer to all your problems and that eventually all the complications will be resolved satisfactorily. Needless to say, one has to seek to solve ones problems, but there can be no room for a feeling of depression and certainly no room for a feeling of despondency, which can be nothing but destructive.
With regard to your item No. 1, in which you complain about lack of good health, it is no doubt largely due to the state of nervousness and depression you are in. I am sure that if you will try to correct this, which depends entirely on you. I am sure that if you will try to correct this, which depends entirely on you, you will also find a considerable improvement in your health, and you will also be able to respond much better to the treatments which specialists give you.
The same applies to Items No. 2, 3 and 4. If you will develop a more optimistic view on life it will give you a more cheerful disposition, your job will not appear so difficult and tedious, and you will not feel so unhappy about it. This will also help you to get your suitable match in due course.
With regard to Item No. 5, concerning “Ayin Hora” the best thing is to dismiss it from your mind and give a few cents every morning to Tzedoko before the prayer of Shema.
Item No. 7, regarding psychiatric help. If you mean seeking psychiatric advice through a visit or two, and the psychiatrist in question ine one who understands the atmosphere in a Jewish religious home, there can be no objection to it. However, I would not recommend that you undertake a lengthy psychiatric treatment, since you yourself could do considerably more for yourself than any psychiatrist can do for you.
I have turned over your contribution to our Special Charity Fund, from which help is given anonymously to deserving cases, which is one of the highest forms of Tzedoko, and I trust that it will add to your merits to become one who is happy with his lot and soon to see with your own eyes that you have good reasons to be happy.
With prayer wishes and blessings,
[The Rebbe’s signature]
What is awesome is that positive psychology i very much into this line of thinking check it out it may change your life!
the rebbe is writing this letter to each and every one of us, because everybody always has problems in life and this is the perfect advice for it. I liked best the sentence “since you yourself could do considerably more for yourself than any psychiatrist can do for you”.. thank you col for posting this!
When it comes to someone’s psychological/psychiatric health there is great care that must be taken, as this affects all areas of someone’s life and being, including their physical and spiritual health. Just as someone who goes to a therapist for example, that if they do not want healing the treatment can be useless, so too even with chemical medications one’s approach can prevent healing. Furthermore, more often than not the origin of one’s issue stems from their approach to things commonly perceived as unrelated. On another note, going for therapy and/or treatment leaves most people feeling like there is something… Read more »
There are a number of comments the Rebbe makes in this letter that are indeed universal. Among others, there is order in what often appears,,especially to one who is depressed, as total chaos. Pondering this in an objective manner helps lessen the fear of total lack of control that frequently leads to major anxiety and other mental/emotional problems, Dismissing all of the Rebbe’s views in this letter (and others) as addressee-specific may cause one to miss out on hora’os that the general public could benefit from. Why are some people afraid to accept that?
This advice is personal to one person, as we see from the way the rebbe address the recepient. I would think it is very dangerous to take this as general advice.
I went back and gave her an edited copy of this letter (took out the second part of letter). Obviously there are lamdonim that require mental care. I made a spiritual assessment of what is lacking there after speaking to her for some time. Obviously I’m not a qualified psychiatrist so I leave her mental care to the team at the hospital. My job as a rabbi is to contribute from the spiritual realm based on my discretion and understanding. Just relax. I was proud of the bochur for having a koch in the right thing in the moment we… Read more »
Focus on the first and main part of the letter and you wont need to worry about the second part. you can not just read the last paragraph of the letter and come to a conclusion , read the entire letter. about gashmiyous, ruchniyos, working on your self, not feeling down, hashem runs the world etc.
To see the number of commenter’s who interpret what the rebbe said here – to a specific person, addressing their specific case – as the rebbes general opinion regarding the masses. Its really frightening, who knows which other letters they’re reading, and basing massive decisions on, perhaps affecting others, perhaps their children…
One oofthe commenter’s said “its crystal clear what the rebbe held regarding therapy” and we could be talking about someones mental health! But “I read in a letter so its crystal clear.
Concerned.
Rabbi Sholom Mendel Simpson, I was a bochur in 770 in the late 70 and early 80 – as you know Bochurim know everything 🙂 we all knew that you were in charge of the Rebbes letters and in adddition keeping them organized. we woud see you coming out of thr rebbes room with large shopping bags of files and you would file them. it is in your zechus that the 27-28 volumes of hebrew letters came out and we are waiting for the rest This letter your gave out and printed here on COL is Pikuach Nefesh, can help… Read more »
To me it sounds like the Rebbe’s advice to this person is this. Focus more on what you need to do and don’t focus so much on who you are or what your capabilities are.
may everyone have refuas henefesh, and refias haguf! perfect timing for posting this! we should recive a new torah from moshiach right now!
When you say that “his head was screwed on right,” it sounds like you’re doubting the necessity for him to receive psychiatric care just because you saw him learning the D’var Malchus. I find it interesting that the Rebbe’s advice for overcoming depression in the letter that’s printed here includes nothing about Torah, mitzvos, or davening. His advice focuses on logical thinking. It’s possible to learn Torah and still need psychiatric care, and none of us should be surprised about that. I recommend that you go back to the psych ward and modify your advice to the girl that you… Read more »
It probably goes without saying (but I’ll say it anyway). To ask these questions in an anonymous forum like this one should be only for the purpose of openly discussing these important issues but not for the sake of arriving at an understanding of the Rebbe’s positions. For that, please have private discussions with respected mashpi’im. Hatzlocha rabbah!
some of us lost love ones. before yom tov it gets harder.
you are here for us always.
many people suffer, and seemingly for no reason, look no further than the holocaust, or look further if you want. a promise it will be “be good” is only for those who are able to see good in everything, including the holocaust. we are not all on that level, so it seems sort of unfair to make such a promise, of tracht gu, v’sein gut, etc.
However, I would notand recommend that you undertake a lengthy psychiatric treatment, since you yourself could do considerably more for yourself than any psychiatrist can do for you.
Super clear using a psychiatrist is only on a temporary basis
Super clear therapy
great letter
It is written to a particular person about a particular situation and does not reflect AT ALL the rebbes opinion about psychiatry and psychology in general.
The headlines to this letter should have been “no need to be depressed ” which 90 % of the letter. The therapist part comes at the end as an additional message. Beautifull and encouraging letter. Many people should wake up after seing this letter and be strengthened. Very practical letter. Thank u
Today, in my capacity of shliach I visited a modern orthodox young girl in the psych ward. She was suicidal and depressed. I told her that she should learn Torah and especially chassidus to elevate her spirits as Jews are spiritual creatures and when we are spiritually empty, there is trouble… She said maybe the Chabad guy can study with me and she went on to tell me there was a Lubavitcher in the hospital then as well (as a patient). Just then she pointed, oh! He is right there! And I see a Lubavitch Bochur (maybe 25 or so)… Read more »
it sounds like the Rebbe is very much pro therapy, but makes important points:
1. Make sure the therapist is one who is familiar with background/community
2. You have to keep a positive outlook in life
3. You have to strengthen yourself spiritually
(correct me if I interpret this wrong)
I don’t think people should take getting psychiatric help lightly if they have other psychiatric conditions such as (bi-polar or schizophrenia) or other psychiatric conditions, the Rebbe is talking here only about depression.
Ah!
So geshmak.
To 2. This is about emotional, not clinical depression. Dr Twerski discusses this at length in his books.
Note the date. The meds we have now weren’t available back then, so the question is moot.
we want and need more please don’t be מונע בר especially in the case when these messages are important for כלל ישראל and may serve a purpose for פיקוח נפש
Just want to understand, is the Rebbe ok with going for therapy?
Thank you Rabbi simpson we need more of this. Thank you COL for printing. Besutifull letter
is the rebbe against taking meds for mental health?
Thank you, I needed this message from the Rebbe now.