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Monday, 16 Elul, 5779
  |  September 16, 2019

Mashpia Writes to 13-Year-Old

From the COLlive Inbox: Some pearls of wisdom from Mashpia Rabbi Yossi Paltiel to a boy at his bar Mitzvah, on core questions in life. Full Story

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amazing
Guest
amazing

Thank you so much Rabbi Paltiel
Thank you COL for posting- please post more things of this sort

wow
Guest
wow

exceptionally beautiful and on target.
Thank you for sharing positive and good quality pieces COL.

So meaningful
Guest
So meaningful

Thank you or posting so down to earth and so much to think about. Thank you col for posting these meaningful articles.

brilliant!
Guest
brilliant!

straight to the point
so deep yet so clear!

with the old breed
Guest
with the old breed

oh boy… at 13 you want it all…just go for emes one step at a time and ask the boss for help.. it is not easy but it is worth it…

nittel nacht
Guest
nittel nacht

1) Three times a day, 2) In a Shul, 3) with a Minyan 4) that doesn’t go too fast 5) or too slow. 6) You should have a regular place where you stand 7) and you should not pace while you daven 8) you should look in the siddur, 9) and you should slowly learn the meaning of the words, so that over the course of a few years you can know enough to daven with pirush hamilos. what’s wrong with davening “too slow[ly]”? Davening is not a race. If it helps him to pace while davening, it’s fine (except… Read more »

i am a fan
Guest
i am a fan

I listen to Rabbi Paltiel on the radio a lot. I consider him my teacher.

true!
Guest
true!

agree 100%
very well answered
but this should not only be for a 13yr old it should be for all chassidim
I really answer number 5, unfortunately in todays age lots of
bochorim and girls are too into fashion and they dont even realize something is wrong with it—poor values

How does one contact this esteemed Rabbi if one has questions
Guest
How does one contact this esteemed Rabbi if one has questions

I have never seen such clarity and realistic Chassidishkiet

how can I be in touch with him ?

Chassidishe nachas
Guest
Chassidishe nachas

What a beautiful challenge to have these questions asked to relatives and mashpiim before your son became bar mitzvah such a meaningful way of preparing for the big day, something to learn from:) Chassidishe nachas!

thank you col
Guest
thank you col

you really gave me clarity please post more of this sort

Beautiful!
Guest
Beautiful!

This was so inspiring, practical, and informative. As someone who did not have a family member mashpiah on that level, it is awesome to hear this advice. Through this short article I feel like I get a lot of the points that have NEVER been explained to me clearly before.

T.T. of the Capital District Alum
Guest
T.T. of the Capital District Alum

Rabbi Paltiel always knew how to build a bochur up without tearing him down… The good people in chinuch never change. Yasher Koach, Rabbi Paltiel!

Thanks or posting
Guest
Thanks or posting

So refreshing reading such meaningful articles like this that can help us raise and educate our children with direction and clarity. Keep up such articles. Maybe a weekly post from a mashpia on Chinuch, hiskashrus would be great!

wow
Guest
wow

can we please have more of this? this is so refreshing

What about some clarity for my teen age daughter
Guest
What about some clarity for my teen age daughter

Its such a wonderful and confusing age – and she is trying so hard- who can I ask these sort of questions to ..

What is the daily learning /davening that is expected from a girl
etc

anyone ?

Disagree with a couple of points
Guest
Disagree with a couple of points

1.I have seen with my own eyes kids that are old and still try to convince themselves that they say the words. I am thirteen and I daven slowly because I know if I do them normal pace for adults-I am not saying every syllable properly.
2. It’s obvious from chassidushe sources that a young brochure should not Dave bearish us however I personally find my davening to be empty and full of either non related thoughts or machos have zoros r”l. I daven with the tzivos Hashem siddur and read every word I can until I would be late.

a mother
Guest
a mother

kol hakavod well explained!

a bachur who wants more help
Guest
a bachur who wants more help

Dear rabbi Paltiel can u plz do. A weekly essay ??

what about a farbrengen once in a while
Guest
what about a farbrengen once in a while

For bochrim of different ages like mesivtah, zal, by rabbi Paltiel on collive?

Saved to my hard drive    :)
Guest
Saved to my hard drive :)

Rabbi Paltiel’s advice is not only applicable to bar mitzvah boys, I am an old lady and there is a lot in there that can help me too, I am saving it to my hard drive so I can reread it regularly.

I second the suggestion of #19, a weekly essay would be fantastic! (And completely in keeping with the saying, if you need something done, ask a busy person!!!)

Meanwhile, for anyone who might not know, Rabbi Paltiel gives many shiurim on theyeshiva.net and they are archived there, you can pretty much pick what you want to learn about.

FOR MORE OF RABBI YOSSI PALTIEL'S
Guest
FOR MORE OF RABBI YOSSI PALTIEL'S

special brand of clarity…

insidechassidus.org

insidechassidus.org
Guest
insidechassidus.org

you can hear, and read, Rabbi Paltiel whenever you have a chance!
i agree COL please feature him more

wonderful
Guest
wonderful

Thank You !

Proud M .P.

So to the point
Guest
So to the point

Great thoughts to think about and to the point this is really for all ages and a lot of good reading for all ages girls and boys . Thanks for posting this, clear to the point inspiration

A Lubavitch 'Dear Abby'
Guest
A Lubavitch 'Dear Abby'

In light of the incredible response from the entire spectrum of Lubavitch (men, women young and told, Shluchim and Baalei Battim etc. ) there is obviously a thirst for such clarity in the modern age. Perhaps COL can publish it weekly column in the spirit of Dear Abby that can address the many questions are all facing now days. Granted not answer apply to everyone however it will generally very good conversations. Do you perhaps the panel of mashpiam (both rabbis and rebbitzens).

Yehudis Bluming for Teenage Girls
Guest
Yehudis Bluming for Teenage Girls

#16

I would contact her-

She understands their heart and really connects and relates to them

Chassidish yet with it

wow
Guest
wow

wow. i esp. loves the first question. thank u rabbi paltiel!

Thank you!
Guest
Thank you!

…From a Bubby who also gained from this piece, and who hopes to spread the knowledge to others IYH.

to #19 who wants a weekly essay
Guest
to #19 who wants a weekly essay

R’ Paltiel did just that for a very long time. The essays, on Chassidus, were published in Beis Moshiach. I have copies of them in a binder. They are excellent. I asked him years ago when he’s publishing it as a book. Got an ambiguous answer about the work it will take. Those who know him, nudge him and offer to help!

Just read
Guest
Just read

Finally got a chance to read great meaningful content that is so needed today. We need as much inspiration we can to raise the youth today. Keep up such articles.
Thank you for sharing

JUSTCONSIDER
Guest
JUSTCONSIDER

Rabbi paltiel is 100% right about davening longer. Sometimes boys get the impression taught by certain yeshivos that it’s ‘chassidish’ to open up a sefer chassidus smack in middle of davening, or that is important to either fake it or really self lament in middle of davening I.E. Shuckling with your eyes closed thinking about who knows what – that is what rabbi paltiel is saying. Usually these acts are empty- I clearly remember that stage of my mesivta life, and many of my peers admitted to me they don’t know why they do it or what they are doing… Read more »

Hakaras HaTov
Guest
Hakaras HaTov

R’ Paltiel wows us again. Yasher koach.

Thank you COL for posting this article.
Guest
Thank you COL for posting this article.

This article brought up 30 plus comments on chassidus! Thank you col for bringing it up.

Was so priviledge to have Rabbi Paltiel as a teacher...
Guest
Was so priviledge to have Rabbi Paltiel as a teacher...

This is absolutely amazing and Emes. It’s well written and thought out. I miss Rabbi Paltiel and his amazing classes.
I will print this and put it on my fridge to remind us of what our true goals are.

so inspiring!
Guest
so inspiring!

first of all, the father who suggested this as a hachana to his son’s becoming a bar-mitzvah is doing something right with regard his child’s chinuch; hats off to him. second, i don’t know what other answers the bar-hamitzvah received , but it’s gratifying to know that he recognized this answer as one so special and inspiring he decided to share it with us. how good is that! third, thank you, rabbi paltiel for taking this young bochur’s request seriously and putting so much thought and effort into answering him. look at the deep response it has generated from the… Read more »

THANK YOU
Guest
THANK YOU

This is perfect! So important and inspiring!

Truth
Guest
Truth

Rabbi Paltiel breathes and lives all of these ideas, you can only begin to imagine the kind of thought and preparation he would have put into this – his ideas come from the heart and hence reach our hearts, in a very pure place. I encourage you to seek him out as a religious leader. And find your own practise that is real and within reach for you all! Chag Sameach

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