Life is full of surprises – good and bad.
“Hi, I’m Lani.* When I was a little girl, I imagined what my engagement and wedding day would look like. Just a few months ago, I think we all had our share of plans and expectations. None of us expected a pandemic to change our lives. I had been dating a great guy when it all began and as the world became more chaotic, we found a shining beacon of joy: he asked me to marry him. It was a dream come true.
My parents were so happy. I am the first of the family to be a kallah. We celebrated with a simple l’chaim following social distancing precautions. It seemed like everything was going to be okay. I never, ever thought that my young mother & father would become hospitalized from COVID-19 and ultimately pass away. But that is what happened. I went from happy bride, to mourning guardian of my little siblings.
My first thought was to cancel the wedding, but then I thought – What would they want? They would want me to build a bayis ne’eman b’yisroel. To have kids in their memory. To continue on.
I work as a secretary and make a modest salary. Right now I am on unemployment and receive a fraction of my regular pay. We will of course be having a very, very simple wedding. I will get a gown from a gemach, and we will have the minyan that we need. I am up at night, however, wondering how we will find the money for even that. For meals for sheva brachos, for a place to live. I had always thought my parents would be there to set me up and help me get all the things I need for a new house. Now that dream is over and any money I have goes toward taking care of my little brothers & sisters. We are stuck.
We submitted our details to Vaad HaRabbanim, and our case, together with a handful of cases were taken to Rav Yitzchok Zilberstein. Rav Zilberstein is doing something amazing: He is taking the time to go pray at the kever of the Chazon Ish for everyone that donates to help 18 orphans get married this month. The Rav even wrote an amazing letter, about how the power of giving tzedaka to people like us is essential for protection from threats like the virus. We couldn’t be more grateful for his support. We are nervous for the future, we are left without family or financial support during this huge transition in life, and we are praying that you will reach out and help. The incredible zechuyos of Rav Zilberstein and the Chazon Ish should bring so much health & parnassah to your family during these turbulent times. And I will be thinking of you under my chuppah!
Lani, 22*
Bnei Brak
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* Being an orphaned bride or groom is a painful and often humiliating experience. Consequently, the month’s participants are understandably unwilling to share their personal stories. This is a fabricated scene, intended to illustrate the sorts of challenges that grieving families experience when making a wedding, together with the relief experienced when they receive financial assistance.
