In honor of the 14th of Kislev, the 90th wedding anniversary of our Rebbe Menachem Mendel Schneerson and his beloved wife, Rebbetzin Chaya Mushka, The Avner Institute presents a powerful firsthand account of that special day in 1928, when thousands of Chassidim and Torah leaders converged in Warsaw to witness bride and groom be united in a ceremony presided by the Frierdiker Rebbe Yosef Yitzchak Schneersohn.
Rabbi Eliyahu Althaus relates:
Wedding Preparations
The Frierdiker Rebbe sent out four different categories of invitations:
1. To Chassidim still in Russia, letters with a request that they farbreng on the wedding day. He wrote that although they would be separated by space, in heart they would be together.
2. To ordinary Chassidim, printed invitations.
3. To former students of Tomchei Temimim, photocopies of a handwritten invitation by the Frierdiker Rebbe.
4. To elder Chassidim, handwritten invitations (by the Frierdiker Rebbe) with their names personalized on them, and concluding with a signature.
Shortly prior to the wedding, the bride, along with her mother, left for Warsaw to arrange the necessary preparations.
The “Oifruf”
(From this point onward, “the Rebbe” refers to the Frierdiker Rebbe, and our Rebbe is referred to as “the Chosson,” the bridgegroom.)
As was customary, the Chosson was called to the Torah on the oifruf, Shabbos before his wedding. During the Mi-Sheberach, the blessings recited in between readings, it was announced that his father and mother would give charity in honor of the wedding (in accordance with his father’s special request), and the congregation was instructed to bless the Chosson.
At the conclusion of the prayer service, a Kiddush was held in the home of the Rebbe’s mother, Rebbetzin Shterna Sarah, which lasted around an hour and a half. Mincha, the afternoon prayer, was then recited and the assembled, approximately seventy in number, preceded upstairs to the Rebbe’s apartment to enjoy a festive meal. In between courses, the Rebbe recited a maamar, “V’chol Bonayich,” lasting roughly an hour and a half.
After the maamar, the Chassidim broke out in a delightful dance, singing joyous Chassidishe melodies. The heartfelt connection between the Chassidim and their beloved Rebbe shone, as they partook in the simcha together. No words can adequately describe the emotions of those who had shared the Rebbe’s pain just a short while earlier, when he suffered under the Communist regime, and were now privileged to celebrate in his midst.
As the dancing subsided, the Rebbe delivered a sicha, a briefer discourse, during which he raised his cup and announced, “I shall now bless our brethren who are left behind the Iron Curtain!” Tears streamed from the eyes of all present while the Rebbe continued with the wishful words of blessing.
The rejoicing and song continued till late at night, and were only brought to an end due to the need for preparation of the next day’s anticipated journey.
Traveling to Warsaw
The next day, on Sunday afternoon, the Rebbe and his family, along with the young future son-in-law, left Riga, Latvia from the train station. Thanks to advance notice by the press of the family’s departure, by one p.m. an enormous crowd had gathered at the train station. A narrow path was formed amid the vast crowd, allowing the Rebbe to pass through. Anyone close enough to do so greeted the Rebbe graciously, and received blessings in response.
Suddenly the train inched its way abroad, while the assembled broke out into chants of “Ki B’simcha Teitzeiu.” Along with the Rebbe in his cart traveled his immediate family, including the Chosson, the Rashag and his family, the Rebbe’s mother, and his younger daughter, Shaina. They were followed, in another cart, the privileged Chassidim who had managed to cross the Latvian border. There they wished each other “l’chaim,” – to life! – expressing gratitude for their great fortune to be able to participate personally in the simcha, as well as sorrow for their colleagues who were forcibly left behind.
As the train neared Dvinsk, a multitude of well-wishers were seen in the distance, waiting to greet the Rebbe and his family during their brief stopover. This same scene repeated itself in Vilna, after crossing the Latvian border.
At seven o’clock Monday morning, the train arrived in Warsaw. They were welcomed by a tremendous crowd who had gathered in honor of their beloved Rebbe – among them hundreds of Chassidim and Temimim. Among the gathering was the Rebbe’s father-in-law, Rabbi Avrohom Schneerson, who had journeyed from Kishinev along with his son for the occasion. The crowd burst out with shouts of joy and blessings as the Rebbe arrived, and several yeshiva students created a pathway for him. A limousine had been prepared to bring the Rebbe and his family to a prestigious hotel.
The Chosson had already taken leave of the scene shortly earlier and headed by taxicab to his hotel, together with Rabbi E.C. Althaus. The two of them made a strong effort to avoid notice by the excited crowd and hastily went on their way. As Rabbi Althaus was privileged to accompany the Chosson throughout the twenty-four-hour period prior to the latter’s wedding, he carefully documented the encounter in its entirety in a letter sent to his family and friends who remained behind the Iron Curtain.
“Chosson Mohl”
The Rebbe had sent a special telegram to Warsaw on Motzoei Shabbos, asking to prepare a meal for the Temimim on the night before the wedding. At eight o’clock Monday evening, the meal in honor of the Chosson, attended by the students of Tomchei Temimim, began.
The yeshiva walls had been freshly painted and festively ornamented. Large electric lamps illuminated the hall, casting bright light onto the elegantly arranged tables.
Although a wedding in Warsaw entailed much additional work and expense, and aroused much curiosity among the Chassidim, the Rebbe was determined that it be held in a holy, Torah place: Yeshivas Tomchei Temimim. Now that the simcha had begun and the indescribable spirit was felt by all present, the Chassidim realized their mistake on questioning the Rebbe’s noble decision.
At the head of the table sat the Chosson; on his right, the Rebbe, garbed in his Shabbos attire and with the streimel, the fur hat, over his head. At the Chosson’s left sat the Rebbe’s father-in-law; the rest of the places were occupied by distinguished guests, Chassidic Rebbes and leading rabbis who had come to take part.
During this festive meal, the Rebbe said a maamar, and following the blessings after the meal, past midnight, the Rebbe danced (upon his request) with the older students. Following the dancing, Rabbo Shraga Feivish Zalmanov stood up and wished the Rebbe, on behalf of all the yeshiva students and administration, hearty blessings of mazel tov. The meal ended with great celebration at two a.m.
The Day of The Wedding
On the day of the wedding, the Chosson’s father, from thousands of miles away, sat down to write a heartfelt telegram to his son, blessing him on his auspicious day. Near the signature, he wrote, “Your father who is really and truly with you, Levi Yitzchak.”
About the day of the chassunah, Rabbi E.C. Althaus writes:
Before Shacharis [morning service] we both went to the mikvah. After davening I sat down to eat, while he learned. As the time for mincha approached, the Chosson shlita [may he live and be well] stood to pray the final Mincha before the chuppah [ceremony], and to say the long confession before the Master of the World with deep concentration.
What an awesome and terrifying sight. No one but the two of us is in the room, but we are very distant from each other, for we do not share thoughts at all.
Can you even imagine my feelings and thoughts at this point, sitting in a corner of this large room, and watching the one who in just a few hours is destined to be the son-in-law of our esteemed and revered Rebbe? Did I not cry with together with him? Was I able to resist joining him in his prayers and pleas from the depth of his heart?
I realize that upon the path of this young man is dependent the paths of our own descendants, and with Hashem’s help, the rays of the righteous shall glorify . . . . And over the above we most certainly cried, the two of us, we wept together . . . . In my heart I thanked Hashem for allowing me to see this all; before me stands “Mendel,” the son of Levik, the one and only, known to all as being born and raised with true purity and holiness . . . .”
After concluding his prayers, the Chosson turned around – his face appearing as exhausted as his body, evidently overworked from the fast. Rabbi Althaus suggested that he go to rest a bit, only to be left unanswered, in continuance with the Chosson’s conduct throughout the entire day not to utter a single unnecessary word. He simply opened the Reishis Chochma, a major ethical work, and solemnly began to study from it.
Eventually, a telephone message arrived, asking if the Chosson was all set to go. Upon hearing the question, the Chosson began to prepare himself, donning a silk kapote [long black coat], and wrapping a gartel, sash, around it.
Suddenly the door opened, and in walked the Rashag and the Rebbe’s uncle, Rabbi M. Horenstein, who were to bring the Chosson to Yeshivas Tomchei Temimim, the location of the kabbolas panim (ceremony to greet the bride) and the chupah.
Kabbolas Panim
The main hall, along with several of the adjacent rooms, were designated for the men. Several other rooms were designated for the women.
At five o’clock in the afternoon, the kabbolas panim began. Police were posted at each doorway, admitting only those with a special entry card. Nevertheless, the building brimmed with people.
The honored guests — Rebbes, rabbis, and relatives – were seated near the head table. Scattered around the tables were congregants, unmarried men, and others. On the head table were candles, a Challah, and tarts. However they were not touched.
The Rebbe arrived at six, accompanied by the Rebbes of Rodzin, Zlatplana, and Novominsk, and yeshiva heads Rav Menachem Zemba and Rav Meir Schapiro.
An utter silence reigned. The Rebbe began to speak. “It is well known that at a wedding, the neshamos [souls] of the ancestors come down to take part in the rejoicing. The previous three generations always come, to all Jews. But some merit having even further-back generations attending.
“As a way to invite, or entice, the neshamos of our holy ancestors, the tzaddikim, to come to the chupah and bless the young couple, I will say some Chassidus from each one [Chabad Rebbe] whose presence I request, from the Alter Rebbe, from the Mitteler Rebbe, from my great-grandfather [the Tzemach Tzedek], from my grandfather, the Kallah’s great-grandfather [the Rebbe Maharash], from the Chosson’s great-great-grandfather [Rav Baruch Sholom], and from my father, the Kallah’s grandfather [the Rebbe Rashab].”
The Rebbe concluded, “Whenever someone says something in the name of its originator, he is to consider it as if that person is standing there, too.”
After this awe-inspiring introduction, the Rebbe recited the maamar “L’choh Dodi” for about half an hour.
At the conclusion of the maamar, the Rebbe instructed that niggunim, Chassidic melodies, of all the preceding Rabbeim be sung. Prior to each niggun the Rebbe announced, “We will now be singing the niggun of the Alter Rebbe,” etc. The introduction to the Rebbe Rashab’s niggun was chanted with extraordinary fervor.
Immediately following the kabbolas panim, the Rebbe went with the Chosson into a private room, where they remained alone for a few minutes. There the Rebbe himself clothed the Chosson with the kittel, the long white overcloak, made from his father the Rebbe Rashab’s own garment. While the Rebbe wrapped the silk gartel around the Chosson’s waist, he said, “In truth, I would like to recite the blessing ‘ozer Yisroel bigvurah,’ to gird Israel in strength. However, I already had this in mind while I did so this morning.”
The Rebbe requested from all the great Rebbes and Torah giants present to personally bless the Chosson at this point.
During the bedekenish, as the bride was viewed and her face veiled, the Alter Rebbe’s Niggun of Four Stanzas was sung.
The Chupah
From there, all continued to the Yeshiva courtyard, brightly illuminated under the open sky. In the center stood the chupah, the marriage canopy, and surrounding it a crowd numbering over five thousand.
Two rows of dignitaries with candles in their hands formed a pathway for the Chosson, accompanied by the Rebbe and his uncle, Rabbi M. Horenstein. After the Chosson reached his place, the Kallah was brought in as well, accompanied by her mother, her grandmother, and her great-aunt, Mushka. The Rebbe ordered the singing of the Alter Rebbe’s Niggun of Four Stanzas during the walk to the chupah, and the Rebbe himself sang along as well.
The kiddushin, the acknowledgment of the witnesses, were recited by the Rebbe. While the latter recited the sheva brachot, the seven blessings, one of the elder Chassidim – who merited to see the Rebbe Rashab – exclaimed, “Oy, the Rebbe, Rabbi Sholom Ber, is being mesader kiddushin!”
The Rebbe of Rodzin – the only one among the distinguished guests to be honored with a place under the canopy — read the kesubah, the marriage contract. The witnesses who signed were Rabbis B. M. Shmotkin and M. Kupershtock, both respectable Chabad Chassidim from Poland.
After the breaking of the glass, shouts of “mazel tov!” rang from all sides, as the assembled sang a joyous melody. The Chosson and Kallah then departed with the in-laws to the “yichud room” (inside the yeshiva), where they could at last be alone.
Festive Meal
All the guests then went elsewhere, to a large hall where the meal was prepared, in accordance with the Rebbe’s wish that only the spiritual part of the wedding take place in the yeshiva building.
Over an hour later the Rebbe, Chosson and Kallah, also arrived, when mashkeh and mezonos, liquor and pastries were served.
The Rebbe walked around with a towel over his shoulder distributing drink, an exact re-enactment of his father’s behavior at his own wedding. Our Rebbe later related that he had offered to assist the Frierdiker Rebbe with the distribution, but was continuously instructed to remain seated. Therefore, he sat very uncomfortably (oif shpilkes) as the Frierdiker Rebbe distributed the mashkeh alone. As the latter approached the place where the yeshiva students were seated, he had the mashgiach, Rabbi Alter Simchovitz, distribute liquor to each student. The Rebbe declared, “Temimim! ‘The Torah only lasts with one who kills himself over it!’ Torah is retained specifically through toil.”
The Rebbe went on to elaborate on the importance of exertion in the study of Torah, and concluded, “Then I will bless you, may you be helped in all matters that you need, and may you have long lives.”
The crowd then surrounded the Rebbe in a half circle and sang niggunim for about half an hour. Following that was the maamar “Asher Bara.”
In the meantime, the Rebbe of Amshinov entered. The Rebbe stopped and said, “With the permission of the Torah and the permission of the congregation – I am holding in the middle,” and continued the maamar for another half hour.
Following the maamar, which lasted until midnight, the Rebbe said l’chaim to the Amshinover Rebbe and then washed for the formal meal. He had one of the Temimim distribute, in his name, a souvenir to each one of the assembled: a facsimile of a handwritten letter of the Alter Rebbe, together with a letter from the Rebbe.
After the meal, at about 3:30 a.m., the assembled rose and danced in a circle. When the Rebbes of Poland sat down to rest, the Rebbe took the Chosson and they danced together. Shortly thereafter the Rebbe retired to his hotel room and the Chassidim rejoiced until six a.m.
During the remainder of the week only select individuals, including relatives and honorable guests, were invited to the sheva brachos, the private meals honoring the bride and groom. Nevertheless, the crowd numbered several hundred strong. When the Rebbe returned home, many Chassidim accompanied him to Riga, and even more came to see the Rebbe off.
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