The Day Reb Yisroel Danced Away

The family of R’ Yisroel Friedman would love to create a compilation of anecdotes, encounters, and stories about him.

In the last several days since his passing on the 7th of Nissan, numerous students, friends, and members of the community have shared their memorable experiences with R’ Yisroel, his insights in niglah and chassidus, and examples of his care for his students’ wellbeing.

It would be very meaningful to collect these memories and genuine moments of depth, wisdom, learning, and humor into a book.

If you have anything to share, please email [email protected]. Any format – written, audio or visual – is welcome and much appreciated.

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By Rabbi Mayer Gurkov – Chabad Center of Passaic County, NJ

I watched from my computer the live stream of the last journey of a giant. I teared up as I saw person after person emerge on screen to escort the Rosh Yeshiva, Reb Yisroel Friedman. Watching, I kept thinking how even in such worrisome times, throngs, though not congregated, of people came out.

To me, Reb Yisroel was not just a Chossid, Goan, etc. I knew him as, though never called him, Feter Yisroel. Reb Yisroel’s wife and my grandfather, Reb Shmuel Dovid Gurkov were siblings. Reb Yisroel was my great uncle, and my father’s generation of cousins called him Feter. My father and his cousins can tell you much more about their personal relationships with Feter Yisroel, I did not have such a close connection with him though I did have the zechus to interact on many occasions. I write to bring kovod and as a zechus for his neshoma, so this example of what a Chossid, Yorei Shomayim, and Lamden can be shared with others, to inspire others.

When I learned in Oholei Torah Zal I was not in his shiur, but he would frequently say hello to me, and I would make a point going to his farbrengens – and what farbrengens they were! His style was to talk for sometimes over an hour straight, and no one wanted him to stop, he would go on and on, pause, the crowd would begin to shift to niggun mode, and then he would begin talking again right before the tune could start. We weren’t annoyed, we didn’t want a break, we leaned in again to hear what Reb Yisroel had to say.

My recollections were his focus on sincerity, temimus. He would farbreng on what is a farbrengen. I kid you not, for well over an hour I recall him talking about it. “What is a farbrengen? What does it mean?” he would repeat, to drive home the point, “a farbrengen is tzu chapen malochim (to catch angles)??” Trying to get us bochurim to understand that the act of farbrenging is not just a light-hearted get-together, or some fancy spiritual endeavor. To farbreng is to be practical, to achieve, to grow. This was Reb Yisroel, sincerity, earnestness, authenticity.

Reb Yisroel lived for Torah and Chassidus. His love for Torah, the Rebbe and the kovod of Chabad were clear. He had tremendous Ahavas Yisroel. Though he used his sharp wit on his talmidim, he always did so with love. I recall one incident that I merited to see, the Ahavas haTorah and Ahavas Yisroel of Feter Yisroel. I davened many, many times with Reb Yisroel in the Rebbe’s room, and on Simcahs Torah 5776 we were there together as well. Reb Yisroel had a minhag that he would do another hakofos after the main hakofos. The Rebbe’s room was packed with people and it’s very difficult to do hakofos at that age. The minyan was done and people started to leave, I waited to see Reb Yisroel, and then the Shliach from Tzfas Rabbi Aaron Leizer Ceitlin, was wheeled in. He was in New York for Yom Tov and extremely ill (and passed away only a week later). Reb Yisroel saw him sitting in the wheelchair, unable to move, and I recall in vivid detail: Reb Yisroel took the Torah, holding onto it with his eyes sparkling, his face literally shining from the joy of the Torah and started to dance for Reb Aaron Leizer. He rocked and swayed for him, dancing for him, singing a niggun with such joy, with simcha and bitochon. You could see the bitochon emenate from Reb Yisroel, he loved the torah and he loved his fellow yid. He wanted to bring him simcha and bitochon on such powerful day in such a powerful place.

After I left Oholei Torah and went on to Morristown and Shlichus, I would always make a point to go over to Reb Yisroel whenever I was in Crown Heights. I was a relative, not too distant but also not too close. He always took the time to ask where I was and what I was doing. After I got married and was living in Crown Heights, I saw him more frequently and he always greeted me with an authentic smile and kind words. I don’t have much to say about him other than these few lines, but I hope others will come out and relate the stories of a Yid who loved to live for Torah and Chabad. Yehei Zicro Boruch.