It’s Tu B’av! What’s the SINGLE greatest thing you can do today?
Not that Corona is behind us by any stretch, and we’re all still reeling from the shared experience of so much pain and loss. The concern for one another has been truly inspiring! There is another pressing matter, however, that no test, mask, nor disinfectant can resolve – in fact, no medical staff or prescription can alleviate it. We are referring, of course, to the Shidduch crisis that is, unfortunately, taking its toll. Though this challenge is also invisible – it is in our hands to work to reverse it. Let us ask Hashem to bring us together in merit of that Achdus, to create many more occasions for simcha.
While parents desire to do everything to help their children, this situation calls for a more coordinated effort to make a dent in this vital matter. We’ve B”H succeeded in raising beautiful Chassidishe families, yet we find ourselves lost when we enter the era of Shidduchim, as if there is a new language we need to learn. And though we are blessed to have dedicated Shadchanim, and great Shidduch initiatives, groups, websites, chats and more, we can all agree, there is still a lot more to be done!
Ideally, it would be most effective to have one central hub where a parent can venture on what we hope will be a very short journey to find their child’s bashert.
Mrs. Dinie Cohen, Shlucha in Sacramento, California, has had a passionate vision to reinstate the concept of having all Lubavitch singles on one updated master list with just their basic info (NOT their profile), allowing parents the luxury of seeing all the eligible names out there in one spot.
In May of 2019, she started the daunting task of collecting names and contacting seminaries and Yeshivos.
Fellow Shlucha, Mrs. Leah Namdar of Sweden, had the vision that such a critical list should also be incorporated into the ChabadMatch database. This way, any Shadchan or parent utilizing the site would be able to search the site for every Chabad single, even those that have yet to create a full profile.
She began working with Moshe Raichman of Chabadmatch.com and Rabbi Meir Geisinsky of ShidduchiminLubavitch.com (SIL). SIL partners with the ChabadMatch platform to give determined parents an opportunity to sign up and upload their child’s detailed profile and then be able to sift through other detailed profiles. (For more about SIL and all its features and privacy see the FAQ on this page https://www.shidduchiminlubavitch.com/about.php).
Rabbi Meir Geisinsky is confident that with time, we as a community, will make serious inroads into the current Shidduch challenge – especially with the public eager to take part in a solution and the very capable, talented and devoted volunteer efforts of Rabbi Raichman.
“Though I knew that others thought about building a master list,” said Mrs. Cohen, “I knew I needed to dive in and actually do it! Chabadmatch extended their hand, and now the investment of all that effort and time are proving rewarding,” she says.
“The point of this list is to empower parents and reignite their spark of hope,” Cohen explains. “As parents, we want to play an active role in searching for the right partner for our child. This list is a platform that will enable us to be proactive instead of being dependent on others reaching out to us.
“Parents don’t have to feel like they reached the point of desperation to add their child to the list – because everyone is automatically added – this makes it more dignified. We have our hardworking Shadchanim that can’t possibly know everyone (thank G-d Chabad has grown so much). Having access allows us to be involved in the brainstorming process in an efficient, effective manner, and allows Shadchanim to focus on facilitating as many matches as possible.
“Building the foundation was our task, a gift to our Lubavitch community – polishing and maintaining it will certainly need the community’s continuous assistance,” Cohen says.
There are currently, BA”H, over 2000 names, and many more names to be uploaded in the near future. The girls will be listed post-Seminary Beis, the boys from age 22, though if desired, listings can be added at any starting age.
“We are so grateful to the many selfless volunteers who gave countless hours to help us get to this point, and we are still looking for more volunteers since we are aiming for one or two representatives in each major Chabad community,” Cohen says.
Anyone can visit https://www.chabadlist.com to start searching the site. To the right of any name is an Edit button which can be clicked to help us update any missing information or delete any profile.
In addition to the list with very basic info, there is a check button that indicates if a name has a full profile, which can be viewed by Shadchanim and members of ChabadMatch/SIL.
To view or join the list, visit ChabadList.com.
If you would like to take part in this exciting project, please email [email protected].
In letters from the Rebbe to hanholos, the Rebbe states that it is their achrayus to find Shidduchim for their Talmidim (see ei. Igros kodesh Vol.11, page 138). We are deeply appreciative of the support of the Yeshivas and seminaries that took the achrayus with which the Rebbe endowed them to heart, and advocated for their Talmidim.
Let us support and advocate for one another through this process, and may we merit to hear Od Yishama Bi’aray Yehuda with the ultimate Simcha with Moshiach.
This project and research is dedicated in loving memory of Chaya Leah bas R’ Zalman Leib (Motchkin) and for the Refuah Sheleima of Chaim Eliyahu HaCohen ben Layla, and Naftoli Hertz ben Raizel.
The bochurim list goes to age 37. The girls goes til age 31. Please explain how you arrived at this calculation?
They probably just don’t have their info.
If parents stopped caring about GEZH,YICHUS, MONEY etc, then this would be resolved. If we can look at the single FOR WHO THEY ARE and not all the Sheker believe me the list would be half it’s size. It’s time to look inside ourselves and be honest!
This is one of the main issues regarding the shidduch crisis
Not only parents; rabbis are equally guilty.
This list only goes to ages in the 30s. There are many people older that this looking for shidduchim
There are some glitches with the website that should be checked and as well as some married/engaged individuals
Will all be taken care of.
Especially when viewing the list on phone
I personally have so many friends married and NOT one ever thought of someone for me. Sit down talk about your friends and reach out!! You are the ones that know the singles the best, and have the ability to make it happen. Each couple should make it their responsibility to set even one friend up!
This is a monumental task and done very professionally. I hope people will edit and update the list and it will be extremely useful in making Shidduchim. Thank you!!!
It IS a start, but the gender age discrimination needs immediate attention.
It must have been a huge job. Yasher Koach and thank you for putting in all those hours. Already using it as a resource. Really amazing!!
Would love to see some young men from that amazing yeshivah.
People should really be asked permission before their info is put on a public database like this
And size, and height and other shtusim.
Size yes. Height no.
This is a beautiful initiative. Kudos to Mrs. D Cohen for working so many hours to get this underway. Hatzlocha to all!
name should not be added without consent of individual being posted
if you have a suggestion to include names of girls or bochurim older than the ones already included PLEASE go for it and do so. It is vital.
It obviously took Mrs Cohen etc a lot of time to compile those lists already included. Anyone who may have info of others work on it yourselves and ADD IT. Make it happen. Thank you Mrs Cohen for taking the initiative you did.
Please don’t forget to show thanks to the people who suggest /try /set u up /their idea or someone else’s .. a small token of appreciation goes a long way ……we are happy to help and it’s not about the gift but appreciation and acknowledging makes a difference. Should be simchos overflowing!!!!
Happy to hear about this.
Just heard some shadchanim charge 180 per name.
Keep the names coming!
Our children are not prices!They are prizes!
Thanks for this initiative.
Rabbi Raichman has been doing this on his own for many years – so glad he got more chefs in his master kitchen… chazak!
Who are the top shadchanim ?
No words. Just thank you. Thank you for making an effort for us. Thank you for showing you care. Thank you for trying to make a change. This is amazing!!! Rly can’t thank you enough!
This is a tremendous zechus for all those involved!
Everyone reading this, take 5 minutes NOW to sign up 3 people.
I have a wonderful daughter…..I asked the shadchan why people say no…She said they won’t even look at her resume because they want “a name”.Please please look at the person for your child…Not what will sound good to your friends and to people.
I would consider your daughter… we’re not looking for a “name” either.
Isn’t crown heights/chabad all about welcoming baalei teshuva??
Yes, exactly, that’s all chabad is about. The Alter Rebbe decided on making a movement just to welcome baalei teshuva.
It was surely a lot of work – it is much appreciated.
The Shidduchim that will be made – will be to your credit.
Much naches from your family!
This was done before, although sadly discontinued… bochrimlist.tk and girlslist.tk
Very happy that it’s being restarted! Sometimes all you need is to see a name to think of a match.
Hatzlocho rabo. yasher koach for undertaking this mitzvah and Mivtza.