By Freidy Orgad, Chabad Shlucha in Cluj-Napoca (Klausenburg), Romania
As we approach the vacation days, I decided to share something I’ve wanted to share for several years. I do not, G-d forbid, want to harm anyone, so it’s important to me that you read this with a positive attitude, and you are invited to comment respectfully.
The summertime is when many people travel abroad and rely on Chabad houses around the world. I need to highlight a few important things that many people do not know about Chabad houses.
So let’s begin:
1. Chabad houses are not funded by any governmental body, neither the Israeli government nor the Jewish Agency. Every Chabad Shliach needs to work very hard (very, very hard) and secure donations that will sustain their activities throughout the entire year.
2. The activities in each Chabad house are very different. Some Chabads have a thriving local community with kindergartens, schools, youth movements, and so on. Some Chabads have a small community of elderly Jews, and some cater to an Israeli/Russian-speaking community. Each Chabad has its own unique assignment. One thing is for sure: all the Shluchim work hard to spread Judaism in their city.
3. Most Chabad houses in the world are not primarily intended for tourists, so they may only sometimes have suitable amenities. Keep in mind that you may need to adapt to the place and not expect the Chabad house to adjust to you.
Are you traveling abroad and need to rely on a Chabad house? With pleasure! Just make sure to clarify everything in advance. Just because you see a Chabad in a certain city doesn’t mean there’s a kosher restaurant, daily/weekly minyanim, a kosher store, or a mikvah. Some Chabad houses have kosher restaurants or a kitchen with a team that cooks, while others (like ours, for example 😉 are self-sustaining and cook themselves. Consider what each place offers, and make sure it fits your needs and is active during your stay.
4. Mikvah – if you plan to use the Mikvah during your trip abroad, clarify in advance. In many places, you need to coordinate in advance so that they can heat the water and ensure privacy. Clarifying in advance can prevent a lot of stress (from experience).
5. Shabbat – planning to observe Shabbat abroad? If you are with a baby, be aware that there might not be an eruv, and it is forbidden to carry a stroller/baby in your hands. Check in advance if there is accommodation with a key/no sensors, the walking distance to the Chabad house/synagogue, etc.
Also, if you decide to join Shabbat meals at Chabad, make sure to RSVP on time. Imagine how you would feel if someone knew on Friday at noon that they were coming to spend Shabbat with you and brought along another six people?
7. Questions – do you have any questions related to your trip? Try checking if the answer is on the local Chabad’s website, Google, or tourist groups for your destination. I don’t mean any offense, but as you know, sometimes there are dozens or hundreds or even thousands of questions, and it can be difficult to answer them all. Unless it’s an emergency, avoid calling the emissary in the middle of the night. And no, inquiring about ordering challah for Shabbat is not considered an emergency (true story!)
8. Payment – a question we sometimes ask ourselves: Why do Shabbat meals at Chabad cost money? The answer is in the first section: no one funds it. Did your flight, hotel, and transportation cost you? Similarly, Shabbat meals at a Chabad house. Did you arrive at a Chabad house that didn’t request payment for the meals? Leave a donation. Be sure that it is greatly appreciated and much neded!
9. Leftovers. Do you have leftover items from your trip that you want to leave? Some products can truly make the Shluchim or community happy (sealed snacks, sealed dairy products, and generally non-local sealed products). But first and foremost, check if they want them, and do not leave open products/brochures or newspapers that need to be genizah.
10. Lastly, Chabad Shlchim go above and beyond throughout the world to spread Judaism, take care of Jews in distress, and ensure the well-being of Jews in general. Alongside this, they are individuals with families and personal lives. Have you encountered a Shliach or Shlucha whose behavior didn’t meet your expectations? Find out what they’ve been through that led them to act that way. Try to give the benefit of the doubt, and there’s no need to criticize them in front of Shluchim in another country.
We are all one family – the Chabad Shluchim family, and we don’t like to hear that. On the other hand, we are always happy to hear praise for another Shliach and pass it on.
In conclusion, I wish everyone a healthy summer, travel, and enjoyment! You are always welcome to our Chabad house with joy, love, and prior coordination.
Tip:
Know which shluchim are up for tourists and which would prefer you not bother them…….
Shluchim are there to spread yiddishkeit. They also deserve to sleep at night. Just because one shliach has a bigger smile than another doesn’t mean that they like surprises or that they want to be a catering company.
Kindness and consideration go a long way. Before we (almost) went on vacation, we asked the local shluchim if there was anything we could bring from New York.
The downvote was a typo. That’s an amazing thing.
i’m so glad you finally said it!
The most ignorant comment ! Chabad is for spreading Judaism , not for accommodating obnoxious travelers who think Chabad owes them anything for free !
Chabad in one big city asked one elderly jew (who came from Israel to settle his pension issues) to get out of their house, and one jewish family with kids and no income took care of him for 10 days. And this is Chabad which receives millions and millions from wealthy businessman jews!
every chabad family has to raise their own salary- noone funds them.
My best friend, modern orthodox from the 5 towns, called a Shliach in the Carribean and he answered the phone, had little tolerance for her questions and concerns, etc. She was even excited that his wife’s name, Chaya Mushka, was the same as my daughter’s….and a bit perplexed when he showed zero emotion when she mentioned that “coincidence “….. Shlchim, we all appreciate your self sacrifice and doing our Rebbe’s work in a daily basis, however, this young article writer sadly fails to understand that if she CHOSE to put herself in a “tourist spot” that is part and parcel… Read more »
You just proved the point of the article. We don’t know what happened to the shliach right before, right after, or during the call. We don’t know if their kids were waiting to be picked up for an extra half an hour because of your friend’s phone call or whether there was a real emergency going on. You just don’t know. Shluchim don’t have call centers to answer calls for them. As a fellow Lubavitcher who feels that this is important, maybe you should set up a call center to take these calls on behalf of that shliach instead of… Read more »
Why are we judging tourists but not Shluchim? We should certainly not judge disgruntled Shluchim. Surely seemingly obnoxious tourists deserve the benefit of the doubt as well?
Most shluchim are NOT where they live for tourists.
Why not? They’re there for Israeli non tourists but not for from tourists?
This comment has so many issues, and every point here is so misconstrued, I can only conclude that it was written by a troll
You missed the point. She was well balanced with grace. Unfortunately people take advantage beyond the call of duty. But still she was balanced and open and welcoming
Practically every chabad family has at least one member named chaya mushka. It would be more surprising if they didn’t. That’s like expecting a secular american to show excitement that you both have a family member named Michael or Emma.
And chabad is not intended to be in the tourist business, they’re trying to get more people to keep mitzvos, not run a business, so this is a very confused complaint.
Just like a Mikva. Just like Avraham had guests so it’s a mitzvah. This is your mitzvah instead of worrying about someone else mitzvah.
Also, I personally open my gracious home in CH to all Shluchim as well as their Baal Habatim…..why do those like Mrs Orgad feel they have a right to demand hospitality when visiting CH as if it’s owed to them, yet, when we visit their “tourist spots” all of a sudden they don’t have time for us??? One of our well known Lubavitch celebrities was on vacation in one of these places and she decided to call the local Shlucha, for no reason other than out of respect simply to let her know she was in town….the Shlucha answered the… Read more »
when we come to CH we pay top top money for a a basement or a room (sometimes the room doesn’t have its on bathroom and shower)
No need to generalise. That is not the general rule BH. Thank G-d if you’re able to host. She does too. People are human. You’re right, everyone should be nice , but let’s judge kindly
No competition it’s not a mitzvah.
you said ” do not leave open products/brochures or newspapers that need to be genizah.” I want to say, most tinok shinoshba jews do not know at all how or where they would even begin to properly dispose of these things. So maybe all chabads should be extra careful not to give them these things frequently or make sure the material they print to hand out to jews doesn’t have genizah material unless a person is specifically looking or asking for that. It also seems like something that chabads should do, to bury these items, maybe not your house personally and… Read more »
Good point about people not knowing about Shaimos. Along the same lines, don’t leave a bunch of כפירה pamphlets stashed around other shuls in the hopes that some unsuspecting Litvak is going to one day find one that you hid in his sefer and suddenly decide that he’s going to start chanting יחי after davening…
Jews all around the world are spreading Judaism. I don’t think i ever asked one of my guest on Friday night to pay for his/ her meal. Even if he is a complete stranger. We give and we give. With love and warmth. This whole article is a lecture , not a welcoming message to anyone who could read it. Thank Gd I dont think I will ever travel to a place where I would have to rely on a chabad house exclusively. Money became your tempo and you are taking away every achdut, love and warmth toward another jew.… Read more »
Wow you are generous. You can afford it. So pay it forward.
Do you have 100 people calling you go come eat by you every Shabbos? (People that are staying in hotels that cost $500 a night and can likely support a Chabad with ease!). Also, how do you pay for the food on your table? Oh your family has income? Shluchim do NOT.
In their home everyone can decide who to have and how many to have. Bh you can afford to host without worry… Shluchim go above and beyond and never leave anyone stranded. The least tourists could do, is respect their time and make sure to leave a little something of appreciation behind… Also remember that in far flung places, it is not easy to get supplies and everything they get is at a high cost. Yes they are there for all jews and their ability to help a tourist is a freebie. These people HAVE a job
Sounds nice, but where is that funded from?
Some shluchim prefer you call very late, even if you arrive to Europe from the USA. Such as after you’ve already arrived. I called months in advance before coming to the country, and the Shliach told me to call after I arrived. When I arrived I called, and even though I had let them know months ahead that I’d be in town – they had left town and wouldn’t be returning for several weeks. I had to call another Shliach much farther away who helped me make some connections. After calling several Shluchim, I was able to make connections, but… Read more »
Dear Shlucha, where do you plan to publicize this letter? I hope you can post it on Facebook and in Jewish social media sites, as well as popular Jewish magazines and other media.
Many tourists do not intend harm, but are ignorant of the inconvenience or annoyance of calling in the middle of the night to order challah.
think not
Very well . Ty for posting.
This needs to be shared far and wide, TheYeshivaWorld, VosIzNeiz etc.
Please everyone listen to this very nice shlucha and be considerate during your travels.
Much hatzlacha to you and all the other shluchim who are ‘out there,’ doing the shlichus of the Rebbe MH”M!
I have heard stories and am astonished by the expectations of travelers around the world who depend on Chabad Houses and the shluchim.
This letter should be advertised in every single Jewish/Frum Publication!!
Kudos to all the Chabad Shluchim World-Wide!!
It needs to be published in publications that cater to the not yet observant Jews as well. Many of them actually rely on Chabad when they travel as well as fellow anash & other already observant Yidden.
The non-frum tourist who shows up unexpectedly or requests kosher food while on vacation is less frustrating than the frum, even if only because this is why the shluchim are living “out there” to begin with- to help yidden grow in their Yiddishkeit.
That is really disgusting. Shluhus is not all about non-frum people. Shluhos should also be about streghtening people who.are frum. This is why so much chabad go off the derech and there is no one to care for them. Such a condecending comment about frum people who are shomer torah umitzvot.
Unfortunately, if a youngster sees and feels that a non frum person gets more attention and is more important than a frum person, their conclusion is that it is not worth being frum and they go of the derech.
Catering kosher food to frum people who would otherwise eat kosher food (although a little less tastier) is not shlichus. If someone goes off the derech because a shlucha didn’t spend her whole weekend slaving away for them, they have bigger issues to worry about.
Do you think it’s normal for a family to move all the way to Romania with their kids and no Chinuch because you forgot to pack your lunch?
Maybe it’s because the frum people should know better. Not show up right before shabbos with an entire family expecting a meal without prior arrangements when they know whats it’s like making shabbos themselves. Even just for themselves. In a city with a proper kosher food supply. And here…just think. One example.
Id like to explain to the best of my ability a very basic concept and I hope everything will make more sense to you: When a shliach has a Sunday school which costs officially 1500 for the year for example, usually if a family can’t pay they will without a question give it to them for free, why? because that is what they are here for, to be mekarev yidden to yidishkeit and this is a window to do it. BUT that doesn’t take away from the fact that it should cost money, and therefore, there is no reason a… Read more »
As someone I used to work with would say “10% of the people cause 90% of the agita.”
People are people. Most people, frum or not, are nice and mostly considerate. Some people are not. Those who aren’t, need to be told.
I didn’t think this was condescending at all. I thought it was a good, gentle reminder that Chabad houses aren’t free hotels.
The frum traveler is generally going to (a) come prepared with kosher food, and (b) will manage on fruits and vegetables or whatever if the supply runs out and the shliach is not available. Neither of these applies to the not-frum, and so naturally the shliach will go the extra mile for them.
If I could upvote this comment multiple times, I would!
The Rebbe decided to send shluchim to every corner of the globe so they can bring the light of Yiddishkeit to those who are lacking it
Frum ppl should bring kosher food, or only travel to places that have.
And here I was thinking that Chabad is there for ALL Jews, not just those who would earn them spiritual brownie points. Silly me.
Shluchim didn’t move to Romania to help Yidden visiting from Flatbush
As Lubavitchers thats what we strive to do. Though each in our own respective places and positions. If you need help with something, spiritual or physical, there’s nothing wrong with asking, just make sure you ask the person/people in the appropriate positions and iyH it would be with joy and honor that we can help you.
If your not sure if a shliach took/takes on a certain job which may be in the gray area, just ask. Np
Thank you !
Chabad Houses are not free hotels, free restaurants etc
Great letter. Is it being published outside COLLIVE as well?
Sad that it needs to be explained, but it’s also our fault that we allowed some misconceptions to take root and thus now we are dealing with people who come with expectations and have a hard time understanding when the local Chabad House/Rabbi has better things to do then prepare fully catered meals for a family of twelve who came to his city on vacation and expect to leave nothing behind because “770 pays for everything”. I have heard this from shluchim who have experienced it. One Shliach in Europe was kind enough to organize a whole shabbos for a… Read more »
This is crazy. People are clueless
Regarding the fact that the family of twelve expects a full course shabbos meal prepared and does not leave a penny to chabad organization bec 770 will pay for it. This is a shame and rightfully so the family should be called for making such a troubling and shameful comment! I agree Frum Jews need to show Hakoros Hatov to a chabad Shluha. But at the same time I believe Chabad Shluhim shluld be expected to serve religious and not religious. If not we are sending the mesaage that if your not Frum you are being taken care. Omce you… Read more »
I am sorry to hear that. I’m glad the rav got involved.
Being a family on shlichus there’s so much more to this article. The shlucha wrote so beautifully but Chabad houses these days are very different then what used to be 30 years ago People complain these days that meals are so expensive but if you’re in a foreign country and someone is sitting and cooking for you, and like she said you were willing to pay for all travel expenses why complain about the price? Take it or leave it and don’t ask for discounts. And then the ones that don’t charge and people don’t leave donations and walk off… Read more »
so long as the caller is polite, timely, and doesn’t take up too much of the shlucha’s time. Moreover, if you did benefit from the advice of a shaliach – send them a donation – to compensate.
Avraham Avinu, who lived in the middle of the desert, had a remarkable habit of always seeking out guests to invite them for a meal and share his knowledge about Judaism. His meals were not given freely; they were indeed quite expensive, and he would present them with a detailed bill. However, if they bentched, he would generously waive the entire cost. In a way, I believe some tourists view us similarly today. They acknowledge the high expenses associated with getting kosher food and experiencing hospitality in the vacation spots they desire. But sometimes, there might be a misconception that… Read more »
If they say Yechi they should pay double. Bentching is to Hashem.
And Avraham Avinu was EXTREMELY wealthy. Whereas Shluchim have literally nothing except what their local residents or tourists kindly donate.
Just wow
Never heard of this misconception. Maybe I’ll try it.
But seriously, maybe if they made a deal with the shliach like finding 15 new yidden in the area, then you might have a point
Benching wasn’t written yet. What did they bencht?
this shaliach is def a gen z or younger millennial. Being on shluchas is a service to jews. there are always parts of a job you wont like. you should accept donations but not charge a fee. Thats the nature of the position you took.
Great article!! Very well written. Another important point to keep in mind. When you reach out to the shliach in advance, ask them what they might need that you can bring them. Ask them if they have children and their ages, bring them a book, a treat etc.
dansdeals on fb
If only Crown Heightsers were as articulate… and had Hachnosas Archim.
You must not be a crown heightser to know how much HA we have
What a sick and disgusting thing to say.
The amount of hachnasos orchim in crown heights is unsurpassed and abnormal.
You should seek forgiveness from everyone who opens their house to random strangers all times of the year
Who is still opening their house? Most people are charging at least $125/ night to stay.
היינו 9 נפשות בחג השבועות ב770 שילמנו על בייסמנט 250$ ליום, האוכל בחנויות ובמסעדות היה יקר, לקחנו את הכל בחשבון מראש. אבל הדבר המדהים הוא שבכל הארוחות החג והשבת תושבי קראון הייטס פתחו את בתיהם ואירחו אותנו בסבר פנים יפות ובכבוד הכי גדול, ולא היינו לבד סביב השולחן היו איתנו עוד אורחים שלא אנחנו הכרנו ולא המארחים הכירו…. עשרות משפחות ומאות אורחים שבאים לרבי זוכים להנות מההכנסת האורחים של תושבי קראון הייטס. כך זה בתשרי וכך זה בחנוכה וכך בכל השנה, יש רשימת שמות וטלפונים שמסתובבת בין האורחים ומתקשרים ומזמינים את עצמם וב”ה אף אחד לא נשאר ברחוב מגורים זה… Read more »
Im sorry to say but the person has a point. And bringing religious fervour into it won’t guilt them to think otherwise…….These people have huge houses extra rooms or basements with ‘boundaries’ or ‘a two day rental’ or other such nonsense that’s actually just becomes a personal insult. We all have to get into ch for one reason or another bc that’s our center. Some of us just cant handle living there full time so yeah we’re asking you. – former insider.
Or maybe I live in crown heights and often host people by me.
Just because you don’t, doesn’t mean others don’t.
Crown Heightsers are hosting people all year long!
It could be that what this comment is trying to say is that CHers should articulate their boundaries on their hachnosos orchim the same way this shlucha did.
When you are coming here and see beautiful Hachnosos Orchim and beautiful open houses, around 770. But you don’t see the other huge part of our community who can’t afford Tishrej, You don’t see how many in CH got food donated to them to sustain YT and got some vouchers to buy other necessities or got Gemach clothes to their kids, and even though they are open their simple houses to host You beautifully, spending long hours to prepare a lavish meal for You, Dear Unknown Guest. We can’t afford to come to visit you so you can pay us… Read more »
This article was written about trolls like you, who expect others who have lives and need parnossa to give up their lives for you.
What’s the difference if you have this rude expectation of a chossid on holy shlichus or a chossid who lives in the holy shechuna?
A fellow Lubavitcher (shliach)
Most crown heighrsers don’t have a penny to scrape together or a room to put their kids to bed at night. Are you saying they should be expected to wine and dine you for your vacations?
How do you scrape together a penny?
Take a drive one day to Monticello. and vacas to ch. laugh. out. loud.
Thank you for writing this!
Another shlucha
It is hard to squash stereotypes, and there will always be people that are rude or unappreciative, there are also those that are very courteous and appreciative and I would say there are more of the latter. Over a decade ago, I spent a year helping the shluchim in Hawaii. Being a tourist destination, it had thousands of Frum Yidden from all walks of life coming through for minyanim and Shabbos meals. Even though not all were perfect guests, I found many to be thoughtful and caring. Some would call in advance to inquire if there was anything they could… Read more »
Please write a response oped
Well said. Thank you.
Thank you, Shluchim! Each day, it boggles the mind more and more when one considers that you literally signed over your entire lives, 24/7/365 to do the Rebbe’s will of spreading Yiddishkeit and achdus. Thank you from our depths! How we love you!
Many shluchim who live in remote locations would truly appreciate a message BEFORE leaving a frum area
Perhaps they need a bottle of cholov yisroel milk or another item that would make a difference to their lives
Send them a message before, ask if they need anything
They will truly appreciate it!
If u r driving thru and area and u DO NOT need anything, give the Shluchim a call just to say a friendly ‘hello’. It’s always so nice to hear a ‘haimish’ voice.
Depends on the relationship. Family, friend, lubavitcher, not, etc
Very well said and polite. About time someone speaks up and clarifies… there is an idea out there, that frum Jews are waiting with baited breadth for a chance to do a mitsva and at no cost either
The majority of people that have a relation with Chabad already know most of what you stated in your letter. I think that publishing the letter risks eroding the enormous good will that Chabad has created worldwide. There will always be ignorant or unconsidered people, but they are a minority and maybe part of the job is dealing with them too. What I suggest is that EVERY Chabad House website should have a Tourist/Travel section (like many do) specifying what services they do or not provide for tourist, local kosher resources, and an extensive FAQ section where some of the… Read more »
From what I have noticed, it’s surprisingly not as well known as one would think among the non Chabad world how they are funded. Also, the article on other websites can be published as if written by a non Lubavitcher who has benefited from Chabad houses and made all the above observations through speaking with the local Shluchim etc.
When a shlucha writes, you can feel more her needs.
It’s all about communication. One has to be careful to not alienate 5 well intentioned visitors because of the one person who was unthoughtful or inconsiderate. It should be said that there’s also a lot of positive in the interactions between shluchim and visitors or tourists. For many Chabad Houses, travelers often add a nice dimension to the shlichus. They can bring in an extra chayus, a fresh face, warm appreciation, and so on. Many come initially as tourists but through that come to genuinely appreciate the Rebbe’s work and the amazing commitment of the Shluchim and their families. I’m… Read more »
it would repel a lot of tinok shinoshbas to post something like this letter
Most lubavitchers don’t appreciate when they call a shliach for even basic things like minyan information in a area, and they are rudely brushed off as not worth their time. When you come to crown heights for the kinus the entire neighborhood is basically given over to you, and people in the neighborhood have to put their lives on pause. The least you can do is have a little mentshlichkeit for when people come from crown heights to your area. The amount of shluchim that all of sudden have no time for you once they hear you’re a fellow lubavitcher… Read more »
Chapter 15
I’ve experienced this too. Not nice
basic minyan times should be on their website, and if not then yes you should be able to email or message them somehow
as someone said, the answer to many common questions can be posted in advance
why should they have any problem at all with giving someone minyan info? isn’t that one of the main reasons chabad houses exist?
I agree with you from a menschlich point of view, it is never good to be rude, and כבוד אכסניא is very important.
However, I would necessarily agree about the comparison between you going to their makom hashlichus and them coming to CH for the kinnus etc.
CH is the Rebbe’s shechuna which belongs to every Lubavitcher equally.
This whole idea of “you coming to visit my neighborhood” when someone comes for the kinnus shows that you lack an appreciation for CH – the Lubavitch capital city.
I would NOT necessarily agree
This is my hometown and that is their hometown. We should each help each other when visiting
It is unfortunate but true sometimes. Once I called ahead of a trip and the Shliach there told me that maybe I should go to another town in the same state that had more Jewish activity.
Great suggestion, but still, it was strange to talk to a Shliach who was trying to actually talk me out of visiting them.
I ended up going to an OU shul in the town, instead. Strange.
He thought you would have a better time there. Or maybe he was going through something. Or maybe anything else
Traveling a lot in the states for work and simply without access to kosher food we are always call and check if there is any kosher place that we can order, which is the best and we can have a Minyan only. But sometimes there is any, so we buy what we can from Walmart /else, like tuna but we don’t have any Chalah. so far there are more welcoming Chabad Houses and open and few are not so much. There are many non registered shluhim that also operating as a Chabad House. We are not looking to be fed… Read more »
I can’t talk for many but I can say Rabbi Mendel & Rochel Druk are exceptional ! They go above and beyond for anyone who comes to Cancun . shabbos In their Chabad house is heartwarming to watch . A heart feels a heart! Thank you for accepting everyone . From every background . Every place. Every kind. My role model shluchim
❤️C&I
Nice article, thank you for publishing. I know how it feels to have a chabad house and have people expecting things without asking in advance.
You should publish this on other sites so that also those who are not chabad can see it.
Hatzlacha Raba!
There have been a few posts on the wonderful DansDeals lately about finding Chabad when traveling. People are CLUELESS! I posted a response asking people to kindly leave a donation after a visit; so many don’t realize the financial situations of our Shluchim. I’d like to see this post go up on DansDeals… it is said graciously, warmly & respectfully, but at the same time, it says it clearly. Shluchim are not shmattehs and they should be treated with the respect they deserve. Lastly…@Tourist. What a disgusting and hurtful comment. I trust you won’t be bothering hardworking shluchim on YOUR… Read more »
Although I have only had to “make use” of Chabad shluchim a couple of times in my life, it amazes me the level of Mesirus nefesh ALL OVER THE WORLD for the shluchim-husbands and wives (and often their kids, too!) It is comforting to know that nearly anywhere one goes, there will be a lighthouse of Torah and Mitzvot there that you can remain connected to.
Your article is well-written and (as I understand) greatly needed.
May Hashem bless you and all of your fellow shluchim all around the world!
Something I would add:
If you are going to chabad in a remote place especially if it’s somewhere without a large kosher structure and you are planning on relying on chabad, contact them in advance and ask if you can bring anything or bring something special for the family that they can’t get there (sweets or chocs for the kids even!). It’s a simple and nice way of showing you thought about it and appreciate them.
Already made a separate post on this, but sometimes with some shluchim it doesn’t pay to try to contact them at all, while with others it doesn’t matter how little or how much warning you give them when you contact them. They always want more orchim and they’ll welcome you no matter what. When I went to Europe a few years ago, France, I contacted the Shliach months before the trip and was told to let them know after I was in town. I had already told them my dates. Then went I got to town I called and they… Read more »
Thank you so much for writting this article, as a shlucha as well, one who travels and also provides meals on demand when needed … I hear and understand every point said, there a few more I like to add, – when we understand the nature of our shlichus, and we see that we can be frequented by tourist, we can decided what type of services are we ok to provide and have it in writting on our social media, website and text you can forward to those who inquire. – we can list all nearby kosher suppliers bakeries, supermarkets,… Read more »
I have sadly seen that people who like to benefit from free Chabad global are the same people that openly criticise and insult Chabad in their own home towns
I wonder if it might make sense to go a step further to meet both shliach fundraising and tourist needs by building tourist accommodation into the model and simply posting or stating up front charges for tourist meals and housing and make clear this is part of how the work on behalf of the local population can be done. I think a lot of tourists could get behind supporting the local population as part of their tourism. I see that this would perhaps appear a step away from the image of Lubavitch as always welcoming with open arms. But it… Read more »
Thank you for everything you do!
I would assume one of the main reasons people stay at chabad houses is to not drive on shabbat and holidays. If someone doesn’t want people staying though they should post it on their website or post there the fee.
I must applaud the guts it took to address the subject with such a nice tone!! Good point and very well thought out. Thank you to all Shluchim and everyone in and out of ch opening your home!! the warmth and welcome is the kind of middos the Hashem wants, the rebbe taught and what we want our children to emulate!
I can’t count how many times that I’ve contacted Chabad before I go visit and they’re just overall unwelcoming or unkind. It sounds like what she’s asking in the article is for folks to be welcoming and kind when dealing with them. This is a 2 Way street. Both parties need to be giving a little bit more kindness. But we don’t have to be thinking about what you were doing, or going through before you snapped at us. Because if you’re going through some thing and you feel like snapping at someone, don’t pick up the phone. Wait until… Read more »
If you get consistent “unkindness”, perhaps you are too overbearing? Whether it’s entitlement to their material resources or time. I don’t believe that it’s prevalent to have rude grumpy shluchim. The default settings of a shliach is exuding happiness and kindness even if it has to be faked because he/she is going through something personally that you know nothing about.
I am not in agreement. Some of the Shluchim are always looking for more orchim and it doesn’t matter to them how early or how soon they know about you.
Others no matter how early or how late they’re contacted, they’re never so excited about orchim.
When I went to Europe I met both types of Shluchim and they’re just normal people. Some are more hospitable and some are less hospitable.
I’m appalled and practically shocked at the vicious attacks from some of the peoples comments. What happened to judge your friend favorably. It doesn’t make a difference why the shluchim are there. One thing is for sure everyone knows they work hard and aren’t funded by anyone. A little consideration wouldn’t be asking much. We’re talking about basic mentchlichkeit. Maaser everyone has to give so if your not asked to pay for your meal be so kind and leave a donation. It’s basic decency. You don’t have to give more than you can but anything is better than taking advantage.… Read more »
Thank you Fraidy.
All is really well said !
From Chabad Nigeria 😉
From all the comments above it seems that there’s serious miscommunication about this issue, I hope this can be dealt with in the future, perhaps maybe the shluchim conference can have a session about this topic. However I would like to publicly thank the shluchim to Cluj who provided delicious food for a family trip that I recently arranged to Romania. The food was good, so was the price, and it was delivered promptly to our location twice about an hour drive from where they are. I regret not calling them beforehand to ask them if they needed anything from… Read more »
I just want to mention that many times the money issue is secondary. We would host many people every Shabbos etc. Unfortunately, when I was sick with yene machlah L”O for a few years , I would have loved to host people, however I didn’t have the strength to host anyone (or even sit at the table). We also didn’t want to publicize our plight. However, when people would call to be hosted and I couldn’t accept them, many would become upset. Please remember the shluchim have a life as well, and you never know what they’re going through. Thank… Read more »
You don’t know what is going on in other’s peoples lives. I know how many I’m times I wanted to be there for visitors but couldn’t and would get literally screamed at for not being able to meet their demands. I didn’t want to share personal reasons to virtual strangers. Very painful.
My rule of thumb when on vacation is “why burden someone else becuase I am on vacation”. Shluchim are not here to be burdened by other frum travelers. If you are frum and traveling, and kosher is important to you, make your own arrangemnts ahead of time for all your kosher needs. Just as you do with your accomodations, attractions and transpertation. If the shluchim setup a food arrangment for tourist then feel free to patronize their establishement and support their community activities. But do not go with expectations that they need to cater to your every need! .
This is the crux of the issue.
Please don’t let the negative comments bring you down.
Good post.
You can post on Facebook: jewish girls travelers
One of the consequences of the Whats app era is that people read the first lines of a letter /article etc. I often have to deal with the consequence of this habit when the school in which I work sends out notices to parents . I do not understand how anyone reading the ENTIRE letter could find that the general tone was negative. The shlucha repeated several times that she is glad to have guests,but would like to make people aware of certain things. To those of you who had negative comments to make ,read the letter as if it… Read more »
Great article!
Spicey comments!!😯😯😯
B”h
I am a non Shaliach Yid who chose to live in the ” Midbar” of Montana by choice. If you pass through Montana on a visit to a National Park or otherwise, we are always welcome to have guests for a meal, for Shabbos, or otherwise. Just to let you out there know that we exist.If you need more details, email me at [email protected]
We understand the challenges of the Shluchim in far out places.We are non Shaliach Yiden who chose to live in the ” midbar” of Montana by choice. We are always open to hosting a passerby to a meal, for Shabbos, or otherwise. If you want more info, email me at [email protected] if you are a tourist, going to a National Park,etc. Just to let you know out there that we exist
Everyone said what was on their mind. We Rabbi Yosef Langer and family , live since 1985 in a tourist convention city before covid. We have met amazing frum tourists and conventioneers! It has been a pleasure meeting people from all over the world.
Fraidy’s article is beautifully written and she says: WE ARE ALL ONE FAMILY!!!!!
Some of us are frum, chassidish or on the road to Yiddishkeit. So surprised by negativity!
From SF: smile on your brother, everybody get together, try to love one another right now. Jefferson Airplane lyrics, our local band.
When it comes to fundraising, we’re obligated to donate and donate and donate. Every day another relative or friend will be posting a new campaign. Yet you bicker when we want something in return.
Who has NOT used Chabad for something, anywhere in the world? Whether on line for Shabbat times and divrei Torah, or to eat/sleep at? I have a friend who lists dozens of Chabad houses she has visited – all with prior arrangements and payments. I have my own personal Gan Eden story in Kowloon – which is like Gehinom – but there is a Chabad house to offer respite to travelers like me. I didnt know what hit me after the longest flight with many delays. I looked like crap, a guy with a kipa approached me and asked if… Read more »
YES. A traveler’s guide is the way to go.
Some Shluchim are simply not looking for orchim, and other Shluchim are always on the lookout for more orchim.
It’s not their fault they run into these misunderstandings. It’s not the visitor’s fault either. The entire idea of an “outreach” program would imply that visitors would have a resource in strange places no matter where they are geographically.
A traveler’s guide wouldn’t necessarily be an answer to every situation, but it might avoid at least some problems.
The problem with a ‘Traverler’s Guide’ for worldwide orchim is that none of the Chabad Houses (or very few) will be interested in being listed as ‘not hospitable’ to orchim – even if they’re not.
Maybe that is a good thing, but maybe it’s not fair to the Chabad Houses. We don’t want to embarrass anyone.
Wonderful, clear and respectful article. Shlichus means leaving family, friends and home comforts to help fellow yidden in need spiritually and materially, but mainly spiritually. Materially when information, directions and emergencies arise. This is done by shluchim worldwide unstitingly and unbegrudgingly. But their care and generosity needs to be suitably appreciated. When we were stuck over Shabbos having missed our connection we immediately contacted the local shluchim rsvp’ed for Shabbos and on leaving made sure to leave a generous donation. As shluchim we know the costs involved and the often difficulty in acquiring kosher ingredients especially in some places. One… Read more »
AFAIK most Chabad houses do not claim to be hachnosas orchim centers. As such no one has any right to complain if they aren’t interested on expending their limited resources on freeloading tourists, In fact a freeloading tourist may even be guilty of ignoring the halachos of eating from a sueda sh’aina maspkas l’baaloh (eating from a meal when the owners do not have sufficient food for themselves) OTOH however while hachnosas orchim and freeloading tourists are not their focus, their locations in the world does in fact give them a unique opportunity to fulfill the mitzva of hachnosas orchim.… Read more »
It’s moyel behekdesh. They’re using tzedaka money to make their vacation more pleasant.
THIS THREAD REMINDS ME OF THE WELL KNOWN ANECDOTE OF TWO FELLOWS WHO CAME TO THE RAV TO COMPLAIN ABOUT AN ISSUE EACH HAD WITH THE OTHER. THE FIRST FELLOW DESCRIBED THE ISSUE HE HAD WITH HIS FELLOW JEW, THE RAV HEARD HIM OUT AND SAID “YOUR’E RIGHT!” THEN THE RAV HEARD OUT THE SECOND PARTY AND TOLD HIM “YOU’RE RIGHT.” THE RAV’S WIFE, HEARING THE EXCHANGES, QUESTIONED THE RAV:” HOW CAN THEY BOTH BE RIGHT?” SHE ASKED HIM. TO WHICH THE RAV REPLIED,”YOU’RE RIGHT TOO!”
No need to scream.
Please press the caps lock button on the left of your keyboard to turn it off.
In Summary, I thought the article was very balanced, I am not chabad and usually was hosted with friendliness and an open attitude… I have experienced one time some nasty treatment, but that was a one off…. Yes its true you are there to help people do mitzvos, and you may have limited resources, but if you are point blank rude, then something is lacking in the very message of torah which you are trying to promote… I understand you may be limited but dont be nasty to me because I am frum…make pretend I wasnt frum, give me a… Read more »
So why focus on that if it was the one exception. Tell us about your other experiences…
That was a very well written letter. Needed to be said. No one should take any offense
Rachel Greenberg
Article is amazing!
https://www.dansdeals.com/points-travel/travel-tips/dos-donts-while-enjoying-chabad-services-travels/
Col should make a post for this. Exactly what everyone was talking about
I seldom travel out of CH. I needed to travel to another city in USA. I made arrangements to stay with family for only X number of days. I needed to stay longer, and an acquaintance (who assured me I could stay in her home for X number of days) cancelled on me, and I paid for restaurant meals and for a hotel. But unexpected expenses are a risk I accepted when leaving my home. Traveling is an expensive luxury and full of risks, financially and otherwise. If you’re not able to absorb extra expenses and the ‘unknown’, than the… Read more »
As someone who enjoys going to Chabad houses when on vacation I appreciate this article spreading awareness. I’m not Chabad and never knew what what the shluchim’s role really is. I was unaware of a lot of these points. Thank you for expressing it in such a nice way!