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Wednesday, 16 Sivan, 5779
  |  June 19, 2019

    Before the Summer, Learn ‘Yichud’

    From the COLlive inbox: An educator calls for frum girls working at summer camp to study the laws of modesty and yichud. Full Story

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    only the girls?
    Guest
    only the girls?

    bochurim and married men need to learn and practice too

    article needs to be re-written
    Guest
    article needs to be re-written

    This should be written as a gender neutral article. Instead it comes off sounding quite sexist

     men also need to learn
    Guest
    men also need to learn

    men also need to learn

    Nice
    Guest
    Nice

    But yichud wasn’t made to protect girls from CSA. It’s an added bonus, but not WHY it was made.

    Yep
    Guest
    Yep

    You’re 100% right

    Men too
    Guest
    Men too

    It’s just as important for boys and men to learn these halachos!

    Wonderful idea
    Guest
    Wonderful idea

    But certainly not just for the girls to learn, bochurim, shluchim, camp directors etc. would all benefit from a review of these Halachos. So much strife could be avoided in our communities if people would adhere to the laws of Yichud. This is also something the Rebbe was quite strong about the need to enforce.

    To #1- As if predators give a hoot about halacha.....
    Guest
    To #1- As if predators give a hoot about halacha.....

    Even men who learn this halacha, do you think predators who are ill with a disease will heed the laws of the Torah?!
    If only…

    Teaching Self Protection
    Guest
    Teaching Self Protection

    This should be directed at boys and girls. And both need to learn how to protect themselves from predators.

    we do
    Guest
    we do

    In my school we first learn the laws of yichud in 9th grade
    And we have a bayis yehudi class in 12th that reviews them
    And usually before summer vacation a rav will come in and talk to us About proper summer conduct .

    to number 4
    Guest
    to number 4

    yichud was made to protect girls and women from being taken advantage of by men

    Girls learn hilchis yichud in high school
    Guest
    Girls learn hilchis yichud in high school

    Bochurim and grown men need to know the halachos, too.

    This article actually rubbed me the wrong way. Besides for **another** nameless op-ed.

    Yichud is for men too
    Guest
    Yichud is for men too

    According to many Poskim, the laws of Yichud also apply to two males. Although this has not been accepted by all, in this day and age it would certainly be worthwhile for Yeshivahs and camps to up the standards. Indeed if young boys are taught about Yichud – that it can even apply with two males – it could/would prevent many undesirable situations.

    sounds good
    Guest
    sounds good

    Thank you

    Melbourne
    Guest
    Melbourne

    The cgi in Melbourne enforces hilchos yichud; meaning what applies with a man and a girl applieswith a counselor and a kid alone anytime. As well as all staff over 18 having a background check and a working with children card.

    to number 4
    Guest
    to number 4

    why else would the rabbis prohibit yichud with a girl from the age of three, no girl at that age could be guilty of doing ANYTHING to bring a man to sin, it can only be the other way around

    high school is too late!!!!
    Guest
    high school is too late!!!!

    i think the point of this article is not to wait for high school, personally i speak to my boys about protecting themself in the mikva from the youngest age, and i speak to my daughters about yichud, if the halacha applies to a 3 year old girl, she should know it, obviously in a sensitive way

    a hundred percent true!!!
    Guest
    a hundred percent true!!!

    ….but yes…men and bochurim do need to learn it too. And rabbis that will be working in the summer with girl counselors should be extra careful!!

    additional fact
    Guest
    additional fact

    Not yichud but keep in mind with people visiting family in the summer. A girl over three cannot sleep in the same room as a boy age 9 and up.( not talking about siblings)

    Yes!!!
    Guest
    Yes!!!

    when I learned about yichud in middle school, we were taught that the halachos of yichud were meant to protect us.

    This was a litvishe school over 20 years ago

    #8 please read
    Guest
    #8 please read

    peditors don’t give a hoot about Halacha, but hopefully potential victims do.

    Just like we read the safety book to kids to teach them about safety, which predictors don’t give a hoot about.

    Teach kids Halacha.

    Re:  #2
    Guest
    Re: #2

    Your comment is unfortunately misplaced. It is in no way gender specific. The תורה says it straight, beautiful and healthy for both men and women individually. It does not have to be the same message for both.

    to # 11
    Guest
    to # 11

    The laws of Yichud were meant to prevent men, just the same as women of all ages from improper behavior.

    Rebbes comment to a camp
    Guest
    Rebbes comment to a camp

    There was a day camp in California
    That wrote to the Rebbe about problems they were having
    During the summer.
    People breaking arms and worse.
    And the rebbe said
    They should pay attention to the תערובות
    From the boys and girl camp staff.

    Maybe someone can verify.
    The exact Loshon.

    Many fine points
    Guest
    Many fine points

    The Rebbe ztz”l also pointed out these laws apply even to parents who adopt children of the opposite gender and in marriages to people who have kids of the opposite gender. For example suppose Avraham is megaresh Sarah and Avraham then marries Rochel who has a girl and Sarah marries Shimon who has a son. Avraham cannot be alone with Rochel’s daughter over age three and Sarah cannot be alone with Shimon’s son who is over age 9. It is silly and pointless to argue whether these halachas were intended to protect girls or boys or men or women just… Read more »

    Best Book, on the subject.
    Guest
    Best Book, on the subject.

    The laws of Yichud, was written by Rabbi Dubov, from England.
    any Lubavitch Judaica store has it!
    by Sichos in English

    Class by Rabbi Berel Bell (I believe)
    Guest
    Class by Rabbi Berel Bell (I believe)

    I’m pretty sure it was Rabbi Bell who gave a shiur a few years back on the Bais Midrash L’Shluchim online forum detailing important and relevant halachos as they relate to common summer camp circumstances. It behooves the COL editors to try to obtain and post a copy of that shiur or a similar one for toeles horabim.

    Men
    Guest
    Men

    I have heard that there could be an issur of yichud for a man even with other men in certain situations.
    I believe men, women and children of any age should equally take these halachos seriously. Since the explosion of CSA cases being exposed, I find myself uncomfortable going to the men’s’ mikveh, knowing what has gone on there… I am also unsure whether I would allow my son to go there until he is much older, perhaps even at age 18.

    lifelight 2
    Guest
    lifelight 2

    to #16 Strongly suggest that you learn the laws of Tznius and the laws of Yichud. Tznius starts at 3. Consult your local orthodox rabbi to find out why. Tznius is a precursor of safety especially for girls. Teaching and applying Yichud should begin when teaching and applying Tznius begins: AGE 3! If a child can be told to “do something/wear something because that is what Hashem wants Yidden to do, because it is good for us” then the training for Yichud can be at the same age as the training for Tznius. However, if parents cannot be bothered to… Read more »

    Yichud of 2 males
    Guest
    Yichud of 2 males

    Many no Jewish cos and.institutions have adopted a firm rule of NEVER allowing a situation to occur in which only one staff member would need to stay with a single child.
    Its time our camps and schools imlement this rule of Yichud for the safety.of our children, and even if only for the protection of the adults too, so as.never to allow such a situation to arrise in the first place.

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