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Thursday, 27 Adar I, 5784
  |  March 7, 2024

Yeshiva Began, My Son is Home

From the COLlive inbox: Although the new year began in many yeshivos, her son remains at home (not connected to tuition). Full Story

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A Real Issue and Action is Needed
July 28, 2014 5:19 pm

This is a real issue and I could have written this myself! I also should’ve written notes while reading the comments. Yes, our system is broken! “Al pi darko” is just lip service as our mechanchim don’t know what to do in order to reach each child “al pi darko”. A child (and I see this in the boys’ yeshivos especially) is either a lamdan or r’l a m’chalel Shabbos and more. THERE IS NO MIDDLE GROUND yeshiva that accepts a bochur at any point in time he may need a yeshiva out of the mainstream. Our “system” has to… Read more »

have one
August 26, 2012 2:37 pm

Go Postville Yeshiva, I LOVE POSTVILLE YESHIVA, they understand and care for their students even when they’re not the perfect type of Yeshiva bochur.
Good luck to this mother, my heart goes out to you

to NUMBER 58
August 26, 2012 9:39 am

please tell me the contact info for rabbi polter gemara online?? and what age level?

thanks

The solution I found
August 26, 2012 2:05 am

I am a guest staying in CH for a few days, as I brought my daughter to be interviewed by the principal of the main Lubavitcher high school in new York. I had a completely different experience BH it wasso positive. My daughter is a lovely Chassidisha girl with very poor skills in learning,not disabled, just not very a academic The principal, met us in her home as it was a Sunday, she spent a long time speaking to us. She was warm and welcoming, and we worked out a viable plan that will enable my daughter to succeed, including… Read more »

Your solution
August 26, 2012 12:04 am

I may have a good solution for you and anyone else interested – a new online Yeshiva program. Please contact [email protected]

Concerned
August 25, 2012 5:50 pm

What about kids that have diagnosed learning
Disabilities ? Suggestions?

Rabbi O's
August 23, 2012 11:34 pm

send him to YNS under Rabbi Orimland (Rabbi O’s)

.....
August 23, 2012 11:01 pm

the same thing with girl seminaries…they pick and choose whom to acceept NO MATTER HOW GOOD OR HOW BADLY THE GIRL WANTS TO GO. wouldnt it make sense to try a smaller yeshiva?????? they r obviously looking for more students…

to # 2
August 23, 2012 7:24 pm

thats very mean!!!!! why would it not be true! thats disgusting that u can say such a thing!

crazy
August 23, 2012 2:58 pm

they should have at least 1 yeshivah that will accept anybody.

TO 67
August 23, 2012 9:17 am

Spot on , couldn’t say it better..

to number 80
August 23, 2012 3:55 am

London has been doing that for years!

Or Menachem, Naiperville, Canada - Lifesaver
August 22, 2012 10:25 pm

Our boy, a fine yiras shamoyim yid, always had a hard time sitting and learning. After years of low self esteem and mismatched teaching methods, we finally found Rabbi & Mrs. Dahan in Canada – south of Montreal.

Immediately, our son found a warm, chassidishe environment with loving teachers and fellow students, and flourished.

Today, our boy looks longingly at those years, and talks about his experience with pride.

Thank Gd for Or Menachem, and parents who are struggling should definitely get in touch.

Every Boy needs personal attention
August 22, 2012 6:35 pm

A bochur can go through yeshiva feeling like he is trying to keep up with the criteria of learning – be it easy or challenging for him, and seldom feel that he was personally noticed or asked about his progress. That’s where feelings of anger, hopelessness, and abandonment come in to the picture, which leads to what many bochurim are doing today. It is essential for the growth of his Yiddishkeit to feel nurtured and cared for by his teachers so that he too will follow in the footsteps of what they are teaching. And the only place I can… Read more »

Send him to Monsey!!!
August 22, 2012 6:19 pm

The Yeshiva in Monsey is opening up for exactly that reason: good bachurim that could use a little extra attention, while at the same time keep a very high standard of learning and Chassidishkeit. I’ve sent my sons there before and would highly recommend it! The mashgichim and Rabbeim make the Yeshiva what it is, and this year they are having some of the best back with them, including the new Menahel Ruchni. Great Yeshiva, great program!

to 28
August 22, 2012 3:52 pm

And just what job? If he can’t learn in this system does he have the background to learn a trade/profession? How well does he use English? Is he up to grade level in math? If not he isn’t going to be much of an earner.

Solution
August 22, 2012 2:20 pm

The yeshiva should be open to everybody and cater to the lowest common denominator.

This way nobody learns anything and nobody feels left out of anything…

to those denying reality (and helping the problem grow)
August 22, 2012 1:55 pm

I know the family involved and if you reread the simple english you will notice that ‘he’s just an ordinary guy who’s worked extraordinarily hard to get where he’s got’ he is a regular bochur and his mechanchim over years know him to be a good, chassidishe bochur (plus much more than I can list here) who puts effort into his learning and chassidishkeit. No ‘special needs’ or the like, just not a ‘gaonishe kop’ nor from a ‘shpitz’ family… Does one need to be a rocket scientist to look around and see whats happening with our youth!?! Problem is… Read more »

with the old breed
August 22, 2012 12:22 pm

hey you know what. every Yeshiva today has issues. but you can not limit your choice. compitition in yeshivas is the best. vote with your feet. the fact is that our children are not getting what they need. Chabad yeshivas are not the only ones.

To the mother
August 22, 2012 11:37 am

After hearing your situation, i would strongly suggest not asking this very sensitive questions to the public who does not know, or care for your child, and therefore any advice that is given through any comments is completely worthless.
What you need to do is find a Mashpia that knows your child and his situation, and who truly cares and thats who you should listen to.

cincinnati
August 22, 2012 11:22 am

Send to the mesivta in Cincinnati! Rabbis Avtzon, Simpson, and Baras. Wonderful Chabad community. New yeshiva and dorm building. New Chabad shul. All under leadership of Rabbi Kalmanson.

parent
August 22, 2012 11:08 am

Instead of talking about identify who you are so we can help you and find out what your problem is. A solution is to form a group so that we can establish a voice so they hear us and to demonstrate in front of all the school that are not willing to help these kid. all they want is money but they are not willing to do something about it.

Great work DARCHEI MENACHEM in CH
August 22, 2012 10:47 am

Darchei, in my opinion is the best yeshiva in Crown Heights.They truly care about the talmidim.They are open to accepting challenged boys,and work closely as a team with parents and Rebbeim. I send a son there. Their mesivta is growing. The atmosphere is welcoming and the staff are praiseworthy. May their example be followed.

to 31, 37 and the like
August 22, 2012 10:01 am

The mother explicitly writes that she tried sending her son to a school better catered to him, but it was HE that insisted he wanted to be part of the mainstream yeshiva system. It is her son that is more strong willed. How can she fight that???? Truly heartbreaking.
Read what she writes. Stop blaming and judging.

Yeahiva / sem directory
August 22, 2012 9:41 am

Can somone create a web site which will have.
1. A list of all yeshivas and sems.
2. A rating system based in both tuition flexibility and learning intensity / structure
3. An available comments and feedback from each by both patents and atudents
4. Tag if its intense learnibg or also has gym, english atudies etc …

Bribg it all out in the open and it will be easier for parents to choose

eytza
August 22, 2012 8:46 am

what the Rebbe wants, is for the teachers to learn to be sensitive and understanding to kids who cannot learn. they cannot learn either because they have LD, ADD, ADHD, or some dysfunction at home. Keep educating the teachers and the parents in these areas, if you want to do what the Rebbe wants. You can raise the level of education, but if you don’t take care of the children with challenges, then you will have children left behind. What does that say in your education from Chasidus. And besides that, there are secular institutions which care about the “stragglers”,… Read more »

to #25
August 22, 2012 7:40 am

i agree this is not the first this happened!

to #13
August 22, 2012 7:06 am

are you serious??? so you believe in keeping things under the rug??? what is wrong with a mother writing her oncern??? if anything the by will see how much his mother cares for him and it will raise his self esteem. I hope you dont deny and supress the feelings of your children…

Kisiva Menachem
August 22, 2012 7:04 am

The school is in Buffalo. It is very much flattered to each individuals needs. Rabbi Munitz is very warm and chassidish

16???
August 22, 2012 6:40 am

Last time I checked Yeshivas are not Harvard, Yale or any other university. Universities accept students on academic ability. They want the creme de la creme of society. Yeshivas are about teaching yiddishkeit. Yeshivas are about accepting students with the values and morals that they want to see exemplified. They are about passing on values to the next generation. For this reason itself, it is wrong not to accept these children. What lesson are you teaching the next generation if we can’t accept every child for who they are? We are not talking about children with behavioural issues or even… Read more »

to #18
August 22, 2012 5:53 am

firstly sorry to this mother and we dont know what exactly the problem was so we cant pass judgement but to say we are going the way of the litvaks is pure stupidity in fact when tomchei tmimim was first opened it was extremely hard to get in and you generally needed to be a serious lamdan, the baal shemtov said those things to people not yeshiva but simple unlearned jews, and most yeshivos do focus on thoses things you mentioned, avodah… to say the yeshivos are imitating and encouraging “litvish style gadlus” is pure ignorance to the mother; i… Read more »

THE LETZER DOR
August 22, 2012 4:41 am

A SOBERING DISTURBING THOUGHT

FOR EVERY BOCHUR THAT STAYS GETS “SEMICHA AND/OR GOES ON “SHlICHUS”., THOUSANDS DON’T! KUDOS TO OUR BRILLiANT “MOTiVATING ” ROSH YESHIVOIS,MELAMDIM, MASHPIAM

#60
August 22, 2012 4:30 am

Addressed to ‘sorry’
I am sorry that you missed out on the basic skills in English reading and spelling. This lack of Chol is a major reason that our community lives on food stamps. I am not talking about years of learning Shakespeare or Ancient History, I am talking about basic skills.

Monsey Resident
August 22, 2012 2:03 am

I recommend sending your son to Monsey Mesivtah if its opening for this year.It is great for boys who need more attention great Shluchim and they now have a new Rosh Yeshivsh. I believe they are advertising on col good luck.

money talks.....
August 21, 2012 11:58 pm

cough up and oh u will find alright! I feel for u ! hatzlocha

Good Yeshiva!
August 21, 2012 11:57 pm

I would highly recommend Yeshiva Or Menachem, where we have sent 3 of our boys. It is located in the mountains of Montreal, away from the hustle and bustle of city life. This is not a yeshiva for “at risk” boys, rather for boys that need that extra boost, whether in learning or self-esteem. Rabbi and Mrs. Dahan, as well as their talented staff and the shluchim they pick, are sensitive and caring to the needs of every bochur. In addition, they provide a real dugma chai of a chassid: pnimiusdik, sincere, and real. Our son wants to and is… Read more »

sorry
August 21, 2012 10:57 pm

I feel for you but. One thing is not understood that thank g d there are schools out there for your child. For egsample you won’t send you kid to browns or to harverd but rather you’ll send him to a schoole wher he’ll fit in and there are meny out there jewish schools that are for your child and he will be exepted with g d help

Yeshiva Ohr Menahem
August 21, 2012 10:10 pm

Please look into the Yeshiva Ohr Menahem in Nepierville, Canada ran by Rabbi Dahan, some boys did very well there

Great idea to all from a big fan.
August 21, 2012 9:54 pm

Firstly there is a new live innovative cheap online live Gemara tototial program premesivta . Com with rabbi polter so if your son did not hit yeshiva yet and is struggling in gemara it is well known there is no betterand effective teacher to put a bachur on his feet in learning then rabbi polter . I know many bachurim that he has turned around and now he is available to upgrade any boy in learning thru his live web classes . Definitely worth while also we should probably speak to him about making something for these boys in the… Read more »

Broken System
August 21, 2012 9:39 pm

We need to open up our eyes and wake up, The mesivta system is not working for over 50% + of our kids, I read the entire article the kid is not special need EVERY BOCHER is special needs, some have hard times in learning Gemoreh some in Chassishkeit, some in other areas, we need to accept everyone with love and give him the attention he needs, we need to reform the mesivta system in my opinion in the following ways: A) Take Rabbi Heller advise from last year, dont give all bochrim 8-10 hours of Iyun, nothing wrong with… Read more »

this poor mother is heartbroken...
August 21, 2012 8:55 pm

she is not complaining so if you have real suggestions then say them nicely! not oh you should have and you could have and you are so stupid because…

Mesivta Menachem
August 21, 2012 7:38 pm

Yes, that is a great school. Small, dedicated and chassidshe. Rabbi Munitz has been involved in chinuch for many years and has a chush in helping boost the bochurim’s confidence and success. Give a call, I believe they advertise on COL – Mesivta Menachem of Buffalo!!

the solution
August 21, 2012 7:03 pm

Either get together with other similar parents (depending where you live) or simply hire your own private teacher for your son. It will cost less than tution! Get him a private, chassidish teacher and let him progress at his own pace. This is a great way to teach all kids, not just those with special needs. But certainly in your situation it would be a viable solution and your son would grow into a chassidish bochur…..and he can still have friends on the side. Try it out. Hatzlacha rabbah.

Educational Support
August 21, 2012 6:36 pm

Any Anash who find themselves unexpectedly homeschooling either a boy or a girl (of any age) please feel free to visit my website for educational and emotional support: http://sustainable-jewish-schooling.blogspot.com

a parent
August 21, 2012 6:25 pm

if something isn’t done about the system, there will be no one who needs anything done.. I know of one boy who was not accepted becasue he is not a good student and does get into fights. However, work with him!!!!!! help him!!!!! find out why this is so. Now he is “dreiin zich in de gasun” how long do you think it will take until he is on drugs and frying out completely? Which of the hankha is going to answer for this after 120? Do not take this lightly. And throwing out kids becasue of tuiton? how long… Read more »

I am in the same boat...
August 21, 2012 6:23 pm

and I’m sure there many more parents suffering in silence.

Here are some delightful quotes from leading Roshei Yeshiva who spent a weenend in CGI Parksville working out ideas to solve our youth problems of today:

“The problem is a problem, but not mine.”
“No specific Yeshiva has the achrayus to take your son. He belongs in a Yeshiva but not mine.”
“Your son misbehaved last Elul, I don’t want him.”

Best Bet
August 21, 2012 6:20 pm

Mesivta Menachem of Buffalo run by Rabbi Munitz

To #20
August 21, 2012 6:07 pm

I agree with you 1000 present. The system is one big waste of time and money. Bochurim go through the system for 8 years or more and many of them don’t know how to learn a peace of gemara rashi tosfos or a maamer chassidus vi a yid darf lernen.

Times have changed
August 21, 2012 5:39 pm

There are a few smaller programs that claim to focus on the needs of their bocharim – but, if you blink – the space/opportunity is gone – The larger Yeshivos should open more classes specifically for boys – mesifta and zaal, who want to learn, but don’t have the proper skills. This way they can be in a proper environment and have positive influences and structure. THEN, there is the problem – What if you truly can’t afford the astronomical tuitions being asked – for you have other children and there is only so much money you can beg and… Read more »

I agree with No' 4
August 21, 2012 5:36 pm

I had no choice and put my son in a non Lubavitch moised, so he woant stay as a Lubavitcher, its not like I had a choice the way Lubavitch moisdes operate today.
Any one remember a girl was sent out from Beis Rivka many years ago regardind money Do we remember that shabbos what the Rebbe said about it. its funny how shluchim and heads remember what they want of what the Rebbe said

We don't need new Yeshivos to deal with this
August 21, 2012 4:52 pm

There is no need to open new Yeshivos for these boys – What needs to be done is – The “main stream Yeshivos” should open their doors to these boys and create classes suitable to their level and speed. NOTE: With that said, the Yeshivos should and must be careful to accept boys who are willing to “tow the line” and appreciate the effort and opportunity.

amn
August 21, 2012 4:39 pm

Go to college and start an early career.

TO # 28
August 21, 2012 4:32 pm

are you crazy or something! the Rebbe didn’t teach us to go to work he taught us to go to yeshiva and do mivtzoim even if you are a little different you can still do it in a different way he can be home schooled.

hey
August 21, 2012 4:29 pm

If your son is fully able… and just ‘not a lamdan’
try the new monsey yeshiva… Thats their demographic.

TO 16
August 21, 2012 4:15 pm

YEASHIVA IS NOT HARVERD…. Yeshiva teaches us to be frum it inspires the kids and teaches them Torah.THE RABBIS are obligated to teach what they know to otheres…When some1 doesn’t acsept you in religoun why would you want to be part of that religoun. Herverd is a law school with NOOOOOOOOOOO RELIGOUS FAITH Yeshiva is base and a big part of this faith .. just think about it.

Another one
August 21, 2012 4:10 pm

Minnesota also closed……

a curios bochur.
August 21, 2012 3:56 pm

its 7:30-ur in zal sitting with your mamar opend…….. its 9;30-ur sitting in zal with your siddur opend for marriv… your started and finished on time, your were cheked on the mashgiachs list and youv signed out for lights out your day has finished and your ready for tmorrow. you realise something though, you make quite a simple observation that weather i learnt or wasted my time with the 4/5 chavrusas iv been sitting across from for 8-hours and that is did i interact with my teachers? did i not get thei attention? i dont remember………………….. 2 weeks later-7:31 YOUR… Read more »

To anonymous or whomever is interested,
August 21, 2012 3:53 pm

I am looking for a bachur to help me with an educational program for young children I am, iyH, running this coming school year. The Baal Shem Tov was a behelfer (Hayom Yom 16 Tammuz). He will grow wonderfully! I will spend time personally tutoring and learning with him. I can advocate for him and help you find an appealing placement when he chooses to return to yeshiva. Please call me if you are interested: 718.308.7458.

Hershel Moss
Mosad Chok leYisroel

LET'S TAKE ACTION!!!
August 21, 2012 3:49 pm

THERE IS DEFINITELY A NEED FOR A YESHIVA FOR CHASSIDISHE BOCHRIM WHO NEED TO LEARN AT A SLOWER PACE/LESS HOURS! I don’t understand why it’s so difficult to create such a system which there is such a demand for. Maybe if we had a yeshiva like this we wouldn’t need so many yeshivas for bochrim going off C”V. WE NEED TO FORM A GROUP OF PARENTS WHO WANT THIS AND FIND THE RIGHT PEOPLE TO SPEAK TO!! TO THIS MOTHER – DO NOT GIVE UP! MAYBE THROUGH COL.LIVE THOSE INTERESTED CAN JOIN AND GET SOMETHING GOING IF NOT FOR THIS… Read more »

HEY MOM, you are not living in he real world
August 21, 2012 3:46 pm

There are such yeshivas out there, you just have to ask the right people, it’s an extensive hard search, like shidduchim, but if you seek you shall find. Please don’t give me your sob stories. Does your child have his health? Boruch Hashem. The rest is up to Hashem.

to #19
August 21, 2012 3:38 pm

from an insider:
sad to say, but you are 100% right.

menahel
August 21, 2012 3:16 pm

i was very hurt when i got a phone call from a menahel of a top mesivta asking me about my campers headed to mesivta

he asked the regular questions and then he asked so how much of my time or his teachers and mashgiachs time will he need ?
will he need any more then just a bit of attention ?

i thought every bochur needs a lot of time and special attn
he did nit seem like he wanted to give that

To post 28
August 21, 2012 3:10 pm

Are you brain dead? Send him to work? If you would be working you would not be posting such stupid comments! So I guess you don’t even work.

Bunch of gangsters
August 21, 2012 3:06 pm

Call the people running the school to a Din Toireh, don’t be scared of them, if the Bais Din in CH won’t accept the Din Toireh use the one in Boro Park, stand up and fight those thrives and gangsters.

A list has been made
August 21, 2012 3:04 pm

a list of which you speak has been made – by Tzach in Israel, of all Israeli Yeshivos.
Who is the “central organization” that will make it for all Yeshivos out of Israel?

COLLIVE – this is a great opportunity

yeshiva is not for everyone
August 21, 2012 2:59 pm

neither is Harvard or even a stam university
You must accept your son as he is instead of forcing him into something that is not fit for him.
You’ll destroy him.

SIMPLY NOT TRUE
August 21, 2012 2:42 pm

From my experience, every bochur can get into yeshiva – JUST NOT THE ONE WHICH YOU MAY WANT, or even the one which may be the best one for him….

You should still try to get him into A yeshiva , and then discuss with the hanholo if there is any way that he could be given more attention etc., or maybe arrange for him to be tutored on the side etc.,.
Forget about brinnwa or l.a., think cincinnati or pretoria…

System is corupt and broken
August 21, 2012 2:41 pm

No one cares for our children not the Yeshivos or the girls schools, what a shame and embarrasement we are in front of our own children. They teach our kids about the Rebbe, while they themselves know that the Rebbe is still with us and they can still do what they want.

What the Baal Shem tov would say
August 21, 2012 2:36 pm

Back in the day, not all boys went to yeshiva, only the smart ones did. What they did instead was go and work. That is the whole thing of a poshite yid, one who was a chassidisher yid who worked. Yeshiva isn’t for everyone, send your boy to work!

Someone from the inside
August 21, 2012 2:30 pm

Correct 21

To #6
August 21, 2012 2:18 pm

Bryski’s yeshiva was closed

Sick and Tired
August 21, 2012 2:18 pm

LOST AT SCHOOL
http://www.amazon.com/Lost-School-Behavioral-Challenges-

EVERY teacher should read this. I am so sick of this problem.
The teachers are NOT trained to handle anything less than perfect.
And barely that.
We are brought in to this world to work on ourselves every day.
Who is helping our children?
Is this what the REBBE would have accepted from any one of us…..

To number 2
August 21, 2012 2:15 pm

Sure sure and their parents give full tuition and donations as well. Who are you to say this is untrue?? One of the parents of those children who “buy” their way into yeshiva i guess.

to #2 and everyone else that doesn't get it......
August 21, 2012 2:11 pm

get out of your box, open your eyes, become aware, yes this is true!!! It begins with our teachers not knowing how to deal in grade one. This child doesn’t need a yeshiva where they cater to children ‘at risk’ in their yidishkeit. yes, Shame on our system, again and again and again. Our milamdim/michanchim need to learn how to teach, and how to understand our children. They are unfortunately clueless. Teachers need to learn to leach, just like any other profession. An electrician learns his skill, as does a plumber, and if they ruin something its replaceable. Teacher that… Read more »

Yossy H
August 21, 2012 2:11 pm

There is almost no Yeshiva that doesn’t have experience with student like your son. It’s more of an issue of finding a few bochorim to take them under their wings. If he’s of Zal age YG Tzfas is a chayousdik place that goes out of the way to make everyone feel comfortable.

Money
August 21, 2012 2:05 pm

If you had money you would not be having a problem getting him into any of our schools.

IT’S ALL ABOUT MONEY!!!!!

Survived the Yeshiva System
August 21, 2012 1:53 pm

The Yeshiva system is broken. In my experience (in the large, “mainstream” yeshivos), all hanholo cares about is if you show up on time in the morning. Once a you have “checked in” for the day, no one cares what you do there, as long as you are there. Days and weeks will pass without a magid shiur or mashgiach or mashpia saying a single word to you, not to see how you are doing or if you understood a difficult Tosafos…until you come late one morning. Then they suddenly notice that you exist, so they can lecture you about… Read more »

OT mesivta
August 21, 2012 1:49 pm

a boy like this wont be excepted there unless he has connections or money.

My heart goes out to this mother
August 21, 2012 1:46 pm

In truth, we have gone from seeking TEMIMIM to seeking Litvishe style gadlus. Slowly, but surely, insidiously, our Yeshivas have changed and gone the way of the Litvaks. The Baal Shem Tov taught us that Hashem wants the heart. How many stories were we told, time and time again, where the ‘simple’ Jew was rejected only to be proven by the Besht or other Rebbe’s as a soul with higher powers. What happened to the stress on Avodah? On tefillah? On Tehillim Mit Treren? What happened to Ahavas Yisroel? What happened to Lifnim Meshuras Hadin? What happened to us? What… Read more »

Neurofeedback
August 21, 2012 1:37 pm

To help your child learn better, try a training for the mind. I use it with amazing results. Google neuroptimal.com. This would be help for a lifetime. Hatzlacha Raba.
Devora Amram

Not the Yeshiva's responsibilty
August 21, 2012 1:27 pm

Would you expect Yale or Harvard to accept a wonderful, well behaved, caring and hard working student – if he/she happens to unfortunately have learning disabilities and is not too bright? That student would clearly not be accepted to those elite institutions. 1) No matter how wonderful a person, his/her learning is not at the advanced level of those schools. 2) No matter how wonderful a person, his/her learning is not at the advanced level of other students. As a result the wonderful person would be doing a disservice to him/herself. He/she would be lost half the time and spaced… Read more »

Concerned Parent
August 21, 2012 1:22 pm

What exactly is the problem? The author has my sympathies and tefilos. But, perhaps if the issues were specified, readers could offer their feedback for support, shared experience or possible solutions.

OMG!!
August 21, 2012 1:09 pm

This mom didnt say her son has special needs!! For heavens sake, he is not a TOP learner, thats all… Give her, and me and the rest of the readers a break!! He has the hasmodah to have gotten top grades, without having the top brain. Shouldnt that count for something?

Ridiculous! why'd you post this?!
August 21, 2012 1:04 pm

Every bochur who is stuck at home will now think that his parent wrote this article and this will shoot down his self esteem big time. His self esteem is bad enough that he’s not in Yeshiva, please don’t make it any worse. It will not do him any good.

Who and where
August 21, 2012 1:03 pm

Name the school. Name the school!
Or don’t complain.

#4 Clueless
August 21, 2012 1:03 pm

I understand the angst of this mother, entirely. Most, if not all, the yeshivos in Chabad that are for boys with learning disabilities and other issues, have many students who are confused about yiddishkeit, on drugs, etc. To raise a child with certain disorders etc. in a Chassidishe way and surrounded by Chassidishe influences, one must keep them in the mainstream yeshiva. Otherwise, chances are very high, they will not continue in this way and will end up, Chas V’sholom, not following the Torah path, on drugs or worse. There are a few mainstream yeshivas today that have some remedial… Read more »

very difficult
August 21, 2012 12:58 pm

The only advise I have is to find a sponsor who has fame and power who can give a lot of money to the school on behalf of your son and I’m sure you will get some more accommodations for your child in that school……

Feel for you!
August 21, 2012 12:57 pm

Sadly your not alone!A Principal has a moral obligation and a ruchniyasdika obligation if he is not accepting a child to suggest a school that would best fit him/her and call the new school and principal ahead of time to speak positively on the childs part!!!

very difficult
August 21, 2012 12:52 pm

The only advise I have is to find a sponsor who has fame and power who can give a lot of money to the school on behalf of your son and I’m sure you will get some more accommodations for your child in that school……

Meir
August 21, 2012 12:51 pm

B”H
Heartbreaking. The BST would say everything that happens to a Yid is directed from above. Thus there has to be a good solution and a good ending. Just seeing your sons resolve puts him head and shoulders over the ” lamden”. Maybe Rabbi Shain can help

Yes they do
August 21, 2012 12:39 pm

One has to take the time to look. I believe Rabbi Bryski His Yeshivas Mordechai Meir is supposed to address issues like this. If not it’s a crying shame

to # 1
August 21, 2012 12:39 pm

who said he’s special needs? he could just be having some difficulties and thats normal

Chanoch Lanaar Al Pi Darkoi
August 21, 2012 12:38 pm

you seem to be missing on the whole concept of Chinuch – it must be Chanoch Lanaar Al Pi Darkoi – on the level of the child. You can’t just expect your child to get into a ‘mainstream school’ if he’s not on that level.

As a responsable parent you have the obligation, given to you by our Chachomim, to find a school for your childs level. And this applies to every parent, otherwise you are not fulfilling the obligation to educate your child!

5 families in the same situation
August 21, 2012 12:35 pm

I am in the same situation and I know of three other families. One yeshiva in particular has taken the liberty of weeding out the kids who may require more exertion of burnt out teachers. They would rather do away with children than replace teachers. In a cash strapped school this is obviously the easiest solution.

i don't believe this article one bit!!
August 21, 2012 12:34 pm

I personally know of more than one such boy who was accepted into a top mesivta this year with open arms.

Mr Obvious
August 21, 2012 12:30 pm

Don’t they have programs for kids with special needs?

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