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Sunday, 22 Elul, 5779
  |  September 22, 2019

Who Made Me Cry on Kingston

From the COLlive inbox: A woman becoming close to yiddishkeit, who came to visit her Lubavitch children in Crown Heights, writes about a shocking incident on Kingston Avenue. Full Story

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wow
Guest
wow

i am glad this was posted.
perhaps we all need to do a little soul searching.
may i remind one and all, teshuva here on this physical plane is highly advisable, bc to leave “after” is doing it the excruciating painful way.
if this is the only way to get you to do teshuva, so be it.
may you get to a point where you do it bc of the love of Hashem, your fellow wo/man and yourself

thank you
Guest
thank you

nice to see someone speak up

what a chlilul hashem /chabad
Guest
what a chlilul hashem /chabad
terrible!
Guest
terrible!

Is the what the Rebbe would want?!?! A yid to speak this way to another heilige yid??? Kal V’chomer, a chossid of the Rebbe, in the shchunah!??! what a disgrace.

Concerned Chabadnik
Guest
Concerned Chabadnik

If someone wants 2 post a letter like this, it is not necessary to say what he called you. You do not have to repeat what he said to you for everyone who looks at this site. You can merely say he called you something which should not be even in his vocabluary or just say he called you something despicable….Who needs such language on a Chabad website. Collive should have edited this before it was put on. There is no need for such words to be on a Chabad website for all to read. I agree that that chossid… Read more »

Not at all the typical
Guest
Not at all the typical

That is so ashaming. I’m sorry that this happened to you, I have been in Crown Heights for many years, and have never experienced something like that. All I can say is that most people are not like that, there are always going to be those select few individuals in any sort of community who are not “all there” so to speak, pls take lightly, it’s really not the typical.

she is right, but
Guest
she is right, but

she should also remember that in every community in the world, there are always people within teh community, and you can’t go saying “is this what this whole community is like?”
It is equally inappropriate of her to provide the public here with the beginning letters of the license plate: Is her goal to publically embaress this individual? That is not right either.
Hopefully, people will not cut others off and will watch what comes out of their mouths, but don’t use one individual to generalize a community.

Long Time BT
Guest
Long Time BT

So, no one is perfect. Maybe he was having a real bad day. You don’t know what he may be going through. Don’t judge him from his worst moment.

Seperate the idealogy from the people
Guest
Seperate the idealogy from the people

Many times we confuse the ideology and the people who practice that ideology. Yet, we have to realize that Chassidus is truth, and just because the people who practice it don’t live up to it, doesn’t give anyone the excuse to not live up to the Chassidic way of life. People are people. No matter what culture, religion, or creed, you’ll have your idiots and gentleman in all denominations.

mmb
Guest
mmb

sad, very sad that we have some nincompoops like them in our midst.

hmm...
Guest
hmm...

no community is perfect…of course we don’t teach to speak like that, and it is looked down upon… don’t blame the fact that your “one step further from yiddishkeit” on some joe shmo who called you a name!!! Just BTW i don’t think a non-religious person would right about the other guy needing to be a ball teshuva “not only me” and further from “yiddishkeit” and specifically mention the name of the store where it happened.. It sounds like a made up “op-ed”.. but kudos to COL for trying to stop nivul peh, and being mean…

This might help...
Guest
This might help...

A line I once heard.very powerful in these situations:

” The Torah Is Flawless, People Are Not. “

Sorry
Guest
Sorry

I don’t know why I feel compeld to appoligis for the lowlife that did that to you and said such stupidity. But please understand
More people need help in all walks of life then we will ever be able to help. And yes CH does have wonderful and kind people living here. Don’t let an incencerive jurk blind you form the beauty of yidishkeit

absolute garbage
Guest
absolute garbage

never happened, if you believe this you’ll believe anything
next you know lubavitchers will be trimming their beards

Sad but true
Guest
Sad but true

The fact is that you can’t judge a book by it’s cover. In this day and age, you cannot assume that just because someone “looks” like a chossid he actually is one. (there are many other reason such as pear pressure etc.)

However, it’s also important to remember that in every social group there are many different personalities.

Blesofsky
Guest
Blesofsky

is this the same guy who made blesofsky cry?

http://www.collive.com/show_news.rtx?id=9332&hl=blesofsky

stam liho'ir
Guest
stam liho'ir

I agree that such behavior is despicable, but we also must realize that it’s not onlt “baalei teshuva” that we need to be mentchlich to, we need to be mentchen, to our neighbors, to our teachers to our spouses etc.

oy veh
Guest
oy veh

thats so sad. I hope that person will see this. He really has issues. If he would want to do teshuva, he would apologize on this website. I hope she realizes that this is not common for us to talk and act this way.

Did you forget that new york drivers are aggressive?
Guest
Did you forget that new york drivers are aggressive?

yes, it may be surprising to see a chassidic jew act in such a disrespectful manner. you can’t generalize CH based on your interaction. Wherever you go in life there will always be people you need to stay away from. I would also be horribly offended in such a situation, but i hope this “step back” you are taking will be a way to get you two steps further!

to # 14
Guest
to # 14

who are you to say it never happened? Just because it didn’t happen to u does not mean it never happened. You sound like a big shot yourself and by the way there are plenty lubavitchers trimming there beards and wearing the levush so get with the program and either stop being in denial or open your eyes.

what does what he said have to do with it?
Guest
what does what he said have to do with it?

how does anyone base their religious level based on what others say, or do? if it comes from within, it shouldnt be so shaky…as soon as we start looking to see where the other one is up to-we’ll never really get anywhere- people are acting inappropriately all day, every day- and its not a good excuse to allow ourselves to go further- cuz that means that we were never secure to begin with.

to number 8
Guest
to number 8

we dont excuse such behavior. In in my worst moment I would never call someone that. It says alot about a person when you see their “worst”

and to the author please dont think about this guy too much. not everyone is like that. In fact he is very much the minority. We are so so happy you came to help your daughter/( in law) with her new baby and please try to see the good that the rest of CH has to offer.

to number 14
Guest
to number 14

i guess i believe this article because unfortunately lubavs do trim their beard!!

so sorry
Guest
so sorry

I was rushing to pick up a geshmake piece of kukesh cake from gombos, and I was so amazed that you let me park in that spot, you even left it open for me.

When I parked i wished you a “gut yohr”, my English is a little broken so it sounded like “gut whore” , so sorry for the misunderstanding. the kukesh cake was soo good.

git shabbes

so far #5 wins!
Guest
so far #5 wins!

balanced comment
YK!

umm
Guest
umm

i totally agree with all the coments above. every one.
but y put the license plate number etc? why not just write the guys name for the same price.

You Shouldn't be so quick to judge...
Guest
You Shouldn't be so quick to judge...

For all you know, such a guy might have meant it as a compliment. Most people use expressions like “honey” or “sugar” because those are things they like……ect.

That was my car!
Guest
That was my car!

One second, you are describing my car. someone stole my car and i would like to know who it was!

Laaniyas Dayti
Guest
Laaniyas Dayti

Probably written by someone on the way out – not on the way in. Tastes like sour grapes. “I’m further from yiddishkeit now..” Huh? Is you move to attract positive feed back from people? And if it is, then you could leave at the drop of some other hat. Someone who is used to the “freedom” of non-Halacha life, would probably go and order a juicy Big Mac. But someone on their way out is probably looking for an excuse to do just that (or did it and is feeling a little guilty…). BTW I am not a baal-teshuvah who… Read more »

A Schuna which "Offcialy" should be the dugma of Ahavas Isroel
Guest
A Schuna which "Offcialy" should be the dugma of Ahavas Isroel

On the topic, there is one important point I’d like to make: I’m myself a Lubavitcher Chosid whom lived in the schuna for the first year after getting married with a new born baby etc. That year, in a Schuna which “officially” should be the dugma of Ahavas Isroel etc. I experienced the complete opposite… Something which stayed with me until today: Starting with the landlord, officially a Lubavitcher, who treated me and my wife like a piece of garbage… I once repeated the exchange he had with us (when there was actually no valid reason, we’re a quiet couple,… Read more »

Oh please
Guest
Oh please

It’s called road rage and the guy is a jerk. What does this have to do with tshuva or yiddishkeit or chabad? He’s obviously just a disturbed individual. You can’t blame everything on yiddishkeit. It’s the BT syndrom generally—forgetting that frum people are people, too, and not everything about us is attributable to our ideology. I hope you don’t cry again, but I found this post profoundly immature.

Another reason to cry.
Guest
Another reason to cry.

The man probably had a terrible childhood, has no self esteem or confidence, probably doesn’t have a good Parnosoh or anybody who really loves him, he probably doesn’t know what love means.
He probably lived a very hard life and is just miserable and to him the world is just a nasty terrible place, and to him satisfaction means getting a good parking spot or lashing out at anybody who challenges him.
Poor fellow.
No, he’s not excused, I’m just trying to provide some perspective.

Laaniyas Dayti
Guest
Laaniyas Dayti

BTW – definitely not Gezha, even though my granparent and back went to Lubavitch. They left Russia too early to be called Gezha.

to #5
Guest
to #5

that word should have been written to demonstrate the ugliness of this event and the person

and just btw, words that are written in the torah and gemara that our children learn are not appropriate for the “holy internet”

Proud English Boy
Guest
Proud English Boy

Crown Heights, being that it is a ghetto like community, where no one is taught the concept of having respect for others, there is really nothing that surprises me anymore.

Shame on you Crown Heightsers, you are the dregs of Lubavitch.

........
Guest
........

If she is pushed away from yidishkeit because of this incident, then she takeh shouldn’t become frum. If her yidishkeit is based on how ppl treat her……..then its not for her.

Ben
Guest
Ben

don’t tell people what to do you women, this is a free country, and I can say whatever the hell I want, you are obviously bored with your life,

thanks, and don’t tell people if they need to be a BT, it is our choice, and our choice only, and a BT means that you actually want it, and not because some bored women said so.

to #9
Guest
to #9

thank you #9! that is what i was looking for!

to #32
Guest
to #32

thanx for the perspective

Exactly the reason
Guest
Exactly the reason

This is exactly the reason why shluchim these days bring mekuravim to israel and kfar chabad instaed of crown heights and 770

to #36
Guest
to #36

u sound really ignorant !!!!

to number 36
Guest
to number 36

“If she is pushed away from yidishkeit because of this incident, then she takeh shouldn’t become frum. If her yidishkeit is based on how ppl treat her……..then its not for her.”

that’s the most ridiculous thing i’ve ever heard! Yes, a person has to accept the Torah no matter what people say to them but ever heard of ahavas yisroel?? Or maybe our shluchim should all be obnoxious to their mekurovim and if they don’t like it, Torah’s not for them….???

crown heightser
Guest
crown heightser

The discussion here is nauseous, have we lost all our shame what a terrible chilul hashem, dear lady on behalf of all the disgusting individuals writing here I am ashamed and truly sorry for what happened, please come back and see all the good that takes place , please see the hachnosas oirchim that takes place in our community like no where else in the world once again I am deeply sorry.

Zalmen

Born elswere, now live in CH.
Guest
Born elswere, now live in CH.

I am truly sorry for what happened to you, and no one should ever go through this, however, this is a very unusual occurrence. This man was probably not 100%, and should therefor be judged as such. I would suggest not to take offense rather pity. He does not share the sentiment or attitude of crown heights, and especially not Chabad as a whole. That said, again as a (now) Crown Hightser, I’m sorry that you went through such a horrible ordeal in our town. Please let this not deter you from visiting us and your children in CH again,… Read more »

ouch
Guest
ouch

I am sorry you had to go through that experience- as a BT for over 15 years and counting I learned 2 things #1- there is a reason that there is Yom Kippur for the orthodox. Everyone has challenges they have to overcome. This gentleman’s is road rage and nivul peh (speaking obsenities)- another person’s is lashon hara (gossip) – another person’s is …. this goes on in every socio-economic group…no one is exempt on their level. The difference between us is that we have the Torah…a guidebook of what TO do. We know that we are a work in… Read more »

Be a leader
Guest
Be a leader

Dear woman,

Please do not let an individual represent the core values of Judaism or Chassidus. Be a leader not a follower, learn and internalize the truth of Torah strive to attain the essence of Chassidus. Be inspired by the truth of the teachings and its leaders, not by the misrepresentation and actions of some unfortunate person. Yes unfortunately we are not all perfect and there are many still learning (hopefully) to be better jews.

to #5
Guest
to #5

WOW- could never have said it better myself!

REALITY CHECK
Guest
REALITY CHECK

I encounter people all the time who decide that “if frum people can act like this, then I don’t want to be a part of it.” Just because someone somewhere behaves in a certain way, doesn’t mean that you tar everyone with the same brush. Not unless your whole foundation is on shaly ground and you are always on the look out for the get out. I’m not saying he’s right and I’m not saying that we don’t expect a higher standard from Jews in general and chassidim in particular. He’s very wrong and yes, better standards are expected from… Read more »

Differentiate
Guest
Differentiate

It is time, that we as a community differentiate between a Lubavitcher, ( Davens from Tehilas Hashem, when wearing a hat wears a pinched one, may wear a sirtuk on special occasions then again may not, have a picture of the Rebbe in their home) and a Lubavitcher Chassid, (one who davens, learns, Chitas and Rambam are givens, dresses, conducts himself in public and private as a chassid). All too often the former is mistaken for the latter with obvious results.

to number 27
Guest
to number 27

how si the comment he said complimetery? its outright low, and insulting..

to # 5
Guest
to # 5

I have only one thing to say to you. Du host ingantzen nisht kayn seichel !!!

beyond reasonable doubt
Guest
beyond reasonable doubt

To the author, As a frum Jew, I am saddened to hear of your story, of how you got turned off by this chossid- lubavitch or not. You have to understand that not everyone is perfect. 1) if he did call you what you say he did, that is not right and is inexcusable, and one thing our torah teaches us is that yes, its wrong, but regardless of anything, we have to do our very best to look beyond reseanoable doubt, in hebrew known as “dan lekaf zchut” im sure if you ask your frum child to explain this… Read more »

Please think about what you are saying
Guest
Please think about what you are saying

Perhaps it was not so necessary to go into the details about the individual’s identity, but really, if I was the woman who wrote this and I read some of these comments, I would cry all over again. She was already insulted, we don’t need to G-d forbid call her more names. Are we not taught that we should “love peace and pursue peace”? Instead of fighting, maybe as brothers and sisters we can each take a lesson for our own lives to be more loving both to strangers and to our close friends, family, etc.

to36
Guest
to36

I am sure you are a proud CHer…

TO US AND TO THIS LADY
Guest
TO US AND TO THIS LADY

First of all, TO MANY OF THE COMMENTORS: PLEASE watch what you say and how you say it. THINK BEFORE you click “post.” Write your comment somewhere else first and then come back to read it again before you post it. Can it make ANYONE feel bad? A number of the posts are defensive of the Crown Heights community to the point of making this woman feel attacked. THINK. RE-READ. CORRECT your comment if neccessary. The opportunity to post will still be there. This is a part of AHAVAS YISROEL. TO THIS LADY. Please understand that this man is not… Read more »

An excellent set of reactions
Guest
An excellent set of reactions

No.32 has shown us all what we have to learn from this – to judge everyone on the scale of merit and to ask ourselves if we would have done any better if we had been given THE SAME IN LIFE AS HIM. I was going to challenge no.5 but no.34 beat me to it – if we wouldn’t have had it spelt out, we wouldn’t have felt the victim’s pain – our ‘pure, kosher minds’ would never have thought of such a word and so we might have thought she was over-reacting to a less offensive word. And then… Read more »

she is of course 100% right
Guest
she is of course 100% right

it does affect your Yiddishkiet when you see proponents of an ideal asking dispicably. this is so obvious, i am surprized that it is being challenged by several posters. This is the meaning of having ‘shem shomayim ne-eh-hav al yodcha’. Also, to #34, sometimes, when necessary, the torah writes ‘tamey’ and when not necessary, the Torah writes ‘asher anenu tehora’. The nasty driver may have nbeen having a bad day, but this is a reminder to all of us, that our bad day behavior can affect others in a very negative way. And to #11, if she has kids in… Read more »

to number 14
Guest
to number 14

are you living in a bubble? why would you say that never happened? denial is not a very good thing! yes it happened and yes we should all be more careful of how we talk tp others!

people vs. religion
Guest
people vs. religion

Many people see religion vis a vis the people who practice it.
And people can give religion a bad reputation and often do.
However, in building a relationship with Hashem, one must realize that only G-d is perfect and when it comes to people choose your friends. Even religious people are not always G-d fearing.
When someone hurts you remember that it is not about the religion rather look into Torah and see the correct response.
People in Crown Heights should feel an added achrayus as to how they set an example in the Rebbe’s schuna. A little self-respect is in order.

#40
Guest
#40

WHAT???? Have u seen kfar chabad lately???? They have the same tsnius problems that CH does if not worse!!! Unfortunately

Don't just name him
Guest
Don't just name him

post his picture, photos of his wife, kids, parents, bobbeh, his place of work…destroy him totally! this is so ridiculous i’m surprised at COL for posting it. if anybody called me THAT I’d give him a chailik in a very loud voice so everyone could hear what he said (and i’m a Bobbeh!) Start crying? HE’D be crying by the time I finished! Instead of getting all weepy & feeling sorry for yourself look at YOUR KIDS! They are frum, no? Do they behave like this? No???? So this was just one stupid guy with a temper. You should thank… Read more »

concerned
Guest
concerned

If her daughter and grandchildren live in CH then how can the whole community be bad? You faith lies within you, not in the hands of an obviously uneducated moron. Ahavas Yisroel, even if it hurts…..

bad behavior inbred
Guest
bad behavior inbred

So many excuses for the ill-bred males in this community. Coming from outside, I never met such rude and inconsiderate people in my life. It was shocking when I first moved here. Even when I leave this CH bubble to elsewhere in NYC, others are more thoughtful regarding social etiquette in public. I have also met the most wonderful people here who are and caring, so it’s not sour grapes. I agree, it’s discouraging to encounter such people when you imagine they should certainly know better. People have so many excuses for their bad character–its disgusting!

far from yidishkeit
Guest
far from yidishkeit

while the guy was rude and inappropriate it doesn’t take away from yiddishkeit…some people are rude some people don’t have middos…everyone has issues they struggle with it shouldn’t take away from ones emunah and bitochon in hashem…i don’t understand how one persons rudeness refelects on the torah

Sorry
Guest
Sorry

Guess now everyone who walks around with a beard and hat , gets looked upon as bad,so one bad moment on a Friday and the whole frum community is no good????????????

#36
Guest
#36

36

……..

If she is pushed away from yidishkeit because of this incident, then she takeh shouldn’t become frum. If her yidishkeit is based on how ppl treat her……..then its not for her.
Yiddishkeit is all about people treating people –
ever heard of Ahavas Yisroel-
or the very reason why we ended up in this galus to begin with Kamza and Bar Kamza,
You make yiddishkeit sounds like joining a country club .
Go learn something!

foul language common in CH
Guest
foul language common in CH

I don’t know if this story happened or not but I can personally testify to the foul language heard daily on the streets of CH. I am shliach from out of town and I recently brought a balebos of mine to 770 (downstairs), it was a friday night and we were sitting at the end of a table trying to learn, and there was this group of 4 or 5 “cool” bochrim having a loud conversation, and every 2nd word was a four letter curse word. Needless to say I was extremely embarassed and when I tried to ask them… Read more »

what????
Guest
what????

in CH no way I can’t believe those story is true not in crown heights this is the town of love and friendship. I was there for Shabbos and I passed at least 50 people and one said good shabbos in response to mine. See Crownheights= love, friendship, unicorns, and rainbows

this whole thing seems a bit much!
Guest
this whole thing seems a bit much!

If this really did happen – and this one little incident (albeit very unbecoming) was enough to tip the scales – notwithstanding all the love, truth, humility & tolerance that Torah teaches – it does not seem that something like this would be a reason to not become frum!? Do you stop putting on Teffilin because someone cut you off on the BQE?! Do you stop lighting Shabbos candles because someone took your parking spot?! Do you stop eating kosher because someone cut in front of you at the bank or grocery store?! TRUE yiddishkeit is stronger and deeper than… Read more »

It HURTS!!!
Guest
It HURTS!!!

When it hurts;you cry out! I only hope that you will take this experience and only strenghthen yourself even more!

happy
Guest
happy

thank g-d she only met one their are SO MANY more out their. p.s in bp or willy you think its better you mind is more healthyer in a small town. we have think always for the good. [dont know how to write it in hebrew]

mistake on #19
Guest
mistake on #19

meant two steps forward!

Can people try to be an ignominious?
Guest
Can people try to be an ignominious?

Before commenting, learn halacha, please do yourself a favor and understand what a chilul hashem is.

Steal my parking, I'll key your car
Guest
Steal my parking, I'll key your car

Yup, that’s how I roll. Why would you even talk to the guy? Wait for him to go into the store to do his errands and then key his car.

d.a.l.
Guest
d.a.l.

some people are mean and nasty… get over it.

to number 42
Guest
to number 42

ok, let me try to break it down for you: if you will leave religion if someone said something not nice, do you think that maybe there was a problem with your beliefs to begin with?? Being frum, is not something you base on how ppl talk to you. if your frum only because ppl talk nice to you, then its not for you. dont make it sound so un-heard of! AND TO NUMBER 41….HELLO TO YOU TOO!!

to # 14
Guest
to # 14

you must be the person who this article is written about.

crown hightsers
Guest
crown hightsers

i am from out of town and the only people that have a hard time speaking respectfully in my community are from crown hights they all have a hard time especially to some one of a different color how sad. CHILLUL HASHEM BIG TIME.

woh
Guest
woh

put judiasm aside. he’s a sick pig.

Reputation
Guest
Reputation

I think the bottom line is that many Ch’ers can do with a bit of improvement on their interacation with others. I have also fielded similar complaints. I live out of town now, and when my daughter meets an aidel nice person from CH, she always says “I can’t believe that they are from Crown Heights”. Ahavas yisroel begins at home….

Steal my parking spot, I'll key your car
Guest
Steal my parking spot, I'll key your car

Yup, that’s how I roll. Why would you even talk to the guy? Wait for him to go into the store to do his errands and then key his car. Yes, I am aware of my passive aggressive problem 🙂

Oy!
Guest
Oy!

This is Poshut not what the Rebbe wants from his kinder, I beg of all of the people who call theirselves chabad chassidim to just act accordingly! May we greet Moshiach speedily now in our days!

youre right
Guest
youre right

youre very right htough in saying he was probably not involved in outreach. there are still alot of ppl who call htmesleves lubavitchers who still have a long way to go before they understand what the rebbe wanted from his chassidim- mainly in spreading the beasuty of yidiishkeit and working on your self. we all need to keeep on working though yes, you may encounter those that are a long way to go

welcome to ch
Guest
welcome to ch

there r so many ch-ers who feel completely entitled to reprimand strangers as they like-it’s pathetic and def. not a mitzvah and not what the rebbe asked..shlichus?!

get over yourselves
Guest
get over yourselves

im sorry that this lady went through some hurt. but threatening everyone that she is going away from frumkeit is rediculous. you choose to be frum and you dont hold it over anyone else that you are gonna leave blah blah blah. NOBODY CARES!!! do what you want, what you believe, its not the people it you and your business with Hashem. so everyone, get a life, let people live. be nice. and do what is right for you. so somebody yelled at you..BIG DEAL!!! its their problem, dont be so offended…so rediculous!!

Oh Please...
Guest
Oh Please...

While I don’t think it was nice for the frum man to treat her improperly, I do think it’s kind of ridiculous for her to question the credibility of religion based on his actions. Any thinking person is aware that individuals act independently, occasionally irrespective of religion. People who make “belief decisions” based on how people act, are taking a dishonest, unintelligent approach to Yiddishkeit (or any belief for that matter). This is not to say that people should not act with respect and dignity. However, if this woman was approaching Judaism honestly, someone’s crass behavior should not get in… Read more »

bad words
Guest
bad words

??????????????a chosid?????????????

 to #7
Guest
to #7

exuse me? she has every right to embarras that man if i were her i would trace the lisence number and put his name on who do you think you are you want her to be pushed away from yiddishkiet?

I'm sorry about what happened to you
Guest
I'm sorry about what happened to you

However in every group there are fringe lunatics. Whether they are clinically diagnosed is not the point. So, I’m sorry you ran into one of them, but a liberal thinking individual doesn’t throw the baby out with the bathwater. Not every Chossid/Jew/American/human being treats others that way. As a matter of fact the great majority don’t. Think about it.

wow
Guest
wow

unfortunately there are ppl like that who dont think b4 they speak

awful to hear
Guest
awful to hear

That is just awful, and this man should come forward and apologize. but this does not mean that everyone is like this. This should not push someone away from yiddishkeit because there is so much more good to be seen in Chabad than this one idiot of a man. So if you are 1 step away from yiddishkeit then thats because you chose so, for other reasons and would like to blame it on this 1 mans behavior. Now if you told me that everyone in chabad treated you this way, well yeh you would be right. But dont blame… Read more »

to #24
Guest
to #24

that is so funny

although he is chabad..
Guest
although he is chabad..

u cant just look at them like saints or something everyones human and makes mistakes so…

thats sick
Guest
thats sick

that guy clearly lacks manners not to mention yiddisheh values. on both parts- you cant judge chabad based one one incident with someone who could of been at his worst state, and he should not of said that. very sad pathetic story,

CHILLUL HSHEM
Guest
CHILLUL HSHEM

whoever is having pity on the bochor i dont know what you are thinking. This lady is now one step further away because of him. What a shame.

to 36 and 37
Guest
to 36 and 37

I agree with 36 all the way, she has alot of issues, I also agree with 37

reform Jew
Guest
reform Jew

Ok, I was recently at an even at Holeil Torah(sp?) and was really really saddened by how my family was IGNORED by those “religious” Jews all around us. It’s like they looked right through us!! We are Jews too, and we tried really hard to not do anything offensive, husband & son wore yarmulkes, daughter and myself wore modest clothing. But sitll- it was like we did not exist b/c we are not Chabad. I remember my father telling me that when he was a young man in Brooklyn, Lubavitchers used to stop people and ask if they were Jewish… Read more »

for a second i thought it was a lip guy
Guest
for a second i thought it was a lip guy

i couldnt believe a chabad chossid could act like that! But on the other hand, this lady, is she trying to make up feel guilty???? ( if she becomes a baal teshuva she probably wont become a lubavitcher thx to this man)

to # 24
Guest
to # 24

hilarious!!!

We want Moshiach now
Guest
We want Moshiach now

To all the well-meaning people trying to respond… and to the nice woman with bountiful grandchildren. Yes, no one should be treated like that. Ahavas yisroel is the hallmark of chabad chasidus. It is nice to see that we can discuss such stories and deal with. However, if others would affect us all this way… then we would not be married, work at a company, or even walk in the street People are different and everyone has their own skeletons to deal with. Some share them and some do not. To the deal person with chasidishe grand children. Thank G-d… Read more »

Take a step back
Guest
Take a step back

I’m not sure how constructive this article is. In cases involving Jews (who generally want to do the right thing but who like anyone else also have challenges in dealing with stressful situations) I have learned to always hear both sides before making a final judgement about what actually happened.

To 97
Guest
To 97

Sorry. Not buying it. Sometimes people have a predetermined opinion before they interact with others and that colors their judgment. So Reform preaches tolerance? How sad for your intolerance. If you go to shul on Yom Kippur, take a look at the Al Cheit confessions. One of them is “Biflilus”. Judging others is a sin, so don’t point fingers. If you are who you say you are, nobody was looking down their noses at you. Likely it’s a reflection of how you were looking at yourself, since nobody does that to strangers whom they don’t know from before. If you’re… Read more »

Real Decency as opposed to Hypocricy?
Guest
Real Decency as opposed to Hypocricy?

This appears to have become a forum for hatred against klal yisroel. Perhaps reform jews are perfect (that’s the message I’m receiving here). But I suggest you put it to the test by watching how they behave to and talk about religious Jews – and not just when they are in a stressful situation. As a frum woman in the business world, I have had ample opportunity to see the selective ‘courtesy’ and unreliable ‘decency’ of many different types of people. I will not tell you the outcomes as I don’t want to people-bash. I think you should look at… Read more »

I just found the old grey car parked in front of ...........................
Guest
I just found the old grey car parked in front of ...........................

The White House

Agree with# 86
Guest
Agree with# 86

Someone who loses control of their language in a moment of stress has something to be ashamed of. Don’t we all? But there comes a time in your life when you have to stop blaming peripheral incidents for your life decisions and using it as an excuse to drop all your beliefs and get public sympathy. Along with proper speech, forgiveness and being able to overlook slights is also a basic tennet of the torah.

Now shall we look into HER actions?
Guest
Now shall we look into HER actions?

By publicly posting the man’s licence plate number, this woman has proved that her ultimate aim was to slander the man who had (allegedly) insulted her. Then she immaturely used religion and the general animosity against religious Jews as an easy way to vent her rage in a sympathetic medium.

SILVER LINING, to all of klal yisroel!!
Guest
SILVER LINING, to all of klal yisroel!!

I personally believe that we, as true chassidim, should look towards the positive in such a disgraceful situation: this is a learning experience for us all, to behave more respectfully towards others in all times!!

WOULD YOU WANT TO BE JUDGED LIKE YOUR JUDGING HIM?
Guest
WOULD YOU WANT TO BE JUDGED LIKE YOUR JUDGING HIM?

THE NOVEMBER 13TH ARTICLE ABOUT R’LEVI YITZCHOK A”H WHICH CONSISTED OF UNMITIGATED PRAISE OF A JEW RECEIVED 186 COMMENTS IN THE PAST 5 DAYS. THE ABOVE ARTICLE RECEIVED 106 COMMENTS OF UNMITIGATED HATRED AND MACHLOKES IN LESS THAN A FEW HOURS! WHAT ARE WE DOING? WHAT POINT ARE WE MISSING THAT
H-SHEM HAS BEEN DRIVING HOME AGAIN AND AGAIN R”L? FOR EVERY NEGATIVE COMMENT THAT YOU HOLD YOURSELF BACK FROM WRITING ONLINE, YOU ARE SAVING LIVES

Chabad was much smaller 100 years ago
Guest
Chabad was much smaller 100 years ago

Chabad accepts everyone! Chabad makes people feel part of the community even if they don’t fully embrace chabad values. Chabad makes everyone feel entitle to be a “Chabad Chossid”. It’s natural to find individuals who dress like a reach Chabad Chossid etc. who are not really a reflection of Chabad. IT’s because Chabad is so so welcoming and inclusive!!! This should answer all those who feel “Defensive” about Chabad. and should also answer the Reformed lady who felt ingnored in Shul etc. —– those who ingnored her are also not Chabad (yet) even if they look the part, they have… Read more »

HELLO
Guest
HELLO

if you guys didnt notice in #24 the guy apoligized it wsa a missunderstanding and haha #81 your funny

that wasnt nice
Guest
that wasnt nice

its true he was wrong but you dont post a license plate number

#97 ignored
Guest
#97 ignored

What do you mean you were ignored? what did u expect ppl to do. come over and shmooze? do u just walk over to strangers and do that? I also think that it was your imagination that ppl were looking at you because here in crown heights we are very open minded and very used to all kinds of ppl from all kinds of places. Now if you were to tell me you were in williamsburgh and got the stares I would believe you, but honey here in CH we are not like that. I think you just felt out… Read more »

Wrong he is BUT
Guest
Wrong he is BUT

Although I find what this individual did is unacceptable, in any community on any level. What I find hard to understand is, the paragraph in where you mention your thoughts. As quoted: “was shocked and burst into tears. Are my children living with such people? Is that how they educate children in this community?” I am confident, that you don’t believe that’s the way we bring up our children, and that you are not a stereotype, to class all the community cause of 1 unlucky incident , I understand the concept of people having higher expectations from the charaidy community,… Read more »

It's because Chabad is INCLUSIVE
Guest
It's because Chabad is INCLUSIVE

and accepts everyone! makes them feel like they are Chabad, even if they are fare from it!

Like comment 106! it’s the smartest comment posted!

dont judge
Guest
dont judge

theses things happen every day ,in every community u got to look at ur self and no thats not the way a person should act and that guy is 1 guy that spoke not nice but u know how many wonderful Jewish people live in crown heights ur children are living among wonderful Jews

Happens all the time.
Guest
Happens all the time.

Yesterday I asked a chassidic Jew who was still halfway in his car to move up a tad so I could park too. He said, I’ll be back in a minute, and walked off into a store. He returned 5 minutes later. Garb is no indication of any person’s mentchlechkeit.

#108
Guest
#108

very well said, we should look at the good ONLY

Do you all have ESP??
Guest
Do you all have ESP??

WOW! How do you all know what really happened without hearing the other side? When someone points a finger at someone else and even tries to identify them – are you all just blindly going to believe it without ASKING the other party what happened? Often it’s the load, vocal person who is wrong and the quiet person on the other side who wants to be private and not get involved in a free for all who is wronged and slandered. Again, in case you do ever see his licence plate HOW do you know how much of this story… Read more »

I question the motives
Guest
I question the motives

If the woman was completely sincere she would speak privately to her family, a Rabbi etc. instead of bad mouthing and trying to identify this man to the public by making a community issue out of it. It sounds like a quest for revenge rather than a search for the truth and far overshadows any wrong that may or may not have been done to her.

Please do not listen to one side of a story
Guest
Please do not listen to one side of a story

From an anonymous writer about a person she tries to publicly identify. Never, never listen to such things. It is a dangerous way to operate and it can c”v do harm! This is I think the very worst issue in CH. It goes beyond an insult and even beyond the tznius issue. Remember all the stories you heard about this one and that one and think about shidduchim that never happened, lasting animosities and prejudices that were born – and resolve Never to listen to any damaging story without personally asking the other party.

106 is the Smartest Comment
Guest
106 is the Smartest Comment

That’s 100% right!

I glad you wrote what I was thinking!

Think about it!

If it ain’t Chabad behavior, it ain’t Chabad!

Though, Chabad affords everyone the ability to dress like and call themselves “Chabad”, to help encourage them… but they obviously don’t truly reflect Chabad!

YES IT CHABAD’S AHAVAS YISROEL that makes Chabad look bad!

This explains many other questions people have about “Chabad”…. VDAL!!!

That and the mini-skirts!
Guest
That and the mini-skirts!

Seriously, chabad! I am chabad and want to be proud…. of what?

To 122 Read comment 121!
Guest
To 122 Read comment 121!

If you are really Chabad, you would be proud of Chabad.

Be proud of the fact that Davka because Chabad is so so inclusive, will you inevitably find many who “look like Chabad” and whom Chabad embraces – who are not really up to Chabad standards, and therefore not a real reflection of true Chabad!

Simple!

Be Proud of Chabad!

To #26, reminds me of the time that....
Guest
To #26, reminds me of the time that....

I was once cut off by an African American driver so I yelled out the window ‘You drive like my shvigger!” except he didn’t hear me so well and instead of hearing “shvigger” thought I said something else that rhymes with that word. I almost started a race riot!

dovid chaim
Guest
dovid chaim

sometimes G-d tests us with things that make us want to give up on Him. He wants to make sure that we are doing it for the right reasons. unfortunately there are sick people in this world who need to be cured but if we give up on life because of those sick people then perhaps we aren’t so healthy ourselves. Best of luck. I became “frum” later in life myself and many times i see things and think is this the kind of life that i want my children to see? and at the end of the day the… Read more »

I am on the man's side
Guest
I am on the man's side

Women have no business driving in the street, they cant drive or park, let them stay home!

jUST KIDDING!

Relax, there are plenty of NUT JOBS in Crown Heights, and you met one of them.

Why don’t you go talk to the 1000’s of eidl good awesome people who live in here and get TWO steps closer to Yiddishkait.

Also, don’t cry because some bozo cursed you… come on!

sick of people who whine and think they are doing us a favor by coming here.
Guest
sick of people who whine and think they are doing us a favor by coming here.

I am so sorry to read that someone took your parking place and called you a name. Lady, wake up. Did you stop going to doctors and condemn the entire medical profession when the pediatrician made you feel that you do not know a thing about babies? Did you drop out of college and condemn the institute for higher education because a professor insulted you? Get a life. You know that you are looking for an excuse not to embrace Yiddishkieit. The reason you need an excuse is because your children in CH have become frum and you do not… Read more »

DONT LET SOMETHING SILLY GET TO YOU !!!!!!
Guest
DONT LET SOMETHING SILLY GET TO YOU !!!!!!

this whole thing is soo unnecicarry! who cares what he called you and why are you takingit soo personally??im sure he wasnt meaning to really get you the way he did ………………… have you ever heared of the “garbage truck”? well sometimes people have hade something go wrong and are full of “garbage” and the way they get rid of it is by dimping it on someone elese so we have to learn NOTto pick it up because if we do we will endup dumping it on someoneeles so drop the garbage and dont let something stupid really have such… Read more »

Reform Jew
Guest
Reform Jew

To 102, you are really the epitomy of the “holier-than-thou” attitude I came up against at the Chabad event I went to. How can you say “if you went to Temple on Yom Kippur” and “if you are who you say you are”? Do you make a habit of questioning another person’s religious habits or Jewishness? Or their faith? Where in the Talmud does it teach you to do that?? My son has gone to school with other Kids whose parents are Chabad (even a Rabbi’s son) and never once did I have the experience that I did at Holeil… Read more »

to #5
Guest
to #5

whats wrong with you?

Thanks - not - to....
Guest
Thanks - not - to....

She is not the only person put away from yidishkeit because of a chassid. My parents also suffered that. When a chassidishe lady that lives in Montgomery, wife of a rabbi – scram at them! Insulted them and said things completly crazy to them. My father who was putting on 2 pairs of Tfilin as minhag chabad, stopes doing so… And my mother removed all the pictures of the rebbe from around the house. This lady may be looked as a tzadeket by some people, but I know of her “good” deeds.

A few years ago
Guest
A few years ago

A few years ago, I was treated very poorly by a woman who worked in a public office in crown heights. I was hurt and judge her as a bad person for her behavior. A couple of weeks later she passed away. It turns out, she was sick with “yene machle” and her boss kept her at her job out of ruchmones till the very end. Needless to say, I understood why she had been so impaticient and intolerant with others. I was not her fault, and I felt bad that I had’nt judge her “lekav zchus”. My point is:… Read more »

inner fulfillment=outer peace
Guest
inner fulfillment=outer peace

It’s not that someone just happened to “loose their temper” when ugly incidents like this occur in CH or elsewhere. Like the creep who would key someones car and think they are justified! It’s a sick consciousness of thought that takes up one’s mind because they are self-loathing in the first place. The real questions to ask are much deeper than surface appearance. It’s a darkness of the soul that is suffocating, needing to develop self-expression in a good way, outside of serious studies. Everyone needs balance to be happy, and to bring harmony outside themselvs into their environment. This… Read more »

bad
Guest
bad

rebbe take care of it

Crown Hgts Resident
Guest
Crown Hgts Resident

Not only should he not speak to a woman that way, he shouldn’t speak to anyone that way.
But in no way should this incident push you even one INCH further away from Yiddishkeit.
Let us just say this is a test of the yetzer hara speaking to you. Don’t give in!

SET THE RECORDI AM THE WOMAN WHOM THIS HSPPENED TO
Guest
SET THE RECORDI AM THE WOMAN WHOM THIS HSPPENED TO

Let’s get the facts straight..I am the woman, so let me clarify a few things for all who wrote and the ones who did not write. 1. I did not know a part of the license plate would be shown, when I first sent my letter, collive wrote to me and asked me where it happened, the kind of car, the license. I did not know they would publish it. I am not out to cast stones publicly. 2. I was horrified by the behavior and the spoken words directed to me, I was dressed modestly so do not assume… Read more »

to all the people who talked against #14
Guest
to all the people who talked against #14

Ever heard of sarcasm??????
wow….

Only religious Jews, right?
Guest
Only religious Jews, right?

I was trying to park in park slope this friday. After at least twenty minutes, I found a stop. As I was backing in, a man who was clearly not Jewish, stepped into the street making ‘faces’ at me and refused to move saying he was ‘holding the place for someone’. I drove away hoping and expecting that the next person who needed a space would force him off the road. Bad manners can happen everywhere. Don’t make it a JEWISH thing just because you have an agenda.

horrrible
Guest
horrrible

crazy

24 is so cute!
Guest
24 is so cute!

To 24:You are still very cute. Keep it up . A little humor goes along way….we need you to stay like this. It is much needed and appreciated!

no way
Guest
no way

judge everybody with favor he did not say it but something similar to it

his only sin was he bought KOKOSH cake - instead of marble
Guest
his only sin was he bought KOKOSH cake - instead of marble

We can forgive everything….EXCEPT! HOW CAN YOU BUY KOKOSH!?
You idiot!! Don’t you know that chocolate covered mandlebroit is WAY WAY better?!

Very Proud of CHABAD
Guest
Very Proud of CHABAD

Proud to see a healthy reaction to this article.

It goes to show that CHABAD IS STILL AMAZING!

CHABAD has such a great outlook and perspective!

Especially comment number 106. (A MUST READ!)

Oy Gevald
Guest
Oy Gevald

I feel so embarrassed. Because a fine American Lady was cut off by a.. um, one of US. we should suck up to anyone who wears a suit and tie. Use your heads, people. I ts like the accident i saw on kingston ave: a fine young man in a suit bumped his car into another car – a buchur. everyone around felt so sorry for this “mekurov.” One yid then went to be a witness on his behalf that he was not at fault. and the bochur who got hit? eh, just another stupid isreali or something – who… Read more »

to # 37
Guest
to # 37

if u have a nasty comment keep it 2 urselfe !!!! again and again i see adults setting “amazeing” examples then they they expect us teens to act right ,wtvr that is considered nowadays

far from unnoticable
Guest
far from unnoticable

this has unfortunately become too commonplace in CH to write it off on a single wakco having a bad day – like there’re any better ones for him. Those who visit the place more often just look at it the same way as the garbage in the streets or you-know-what in the elevators. Hardly a new phenomena, but seems to be getting worse. Last Sukkos my wife was verbally abused with a much worse lexxicon in the presense of my children while sitting in her own legally parked car because some local over-age “bochurim” wanted her to move away, seeing… Read more »

That guy deserves a punch
Guest
That guy deserves a punch

If such a thing would happen to me I would punch the guy in the face.

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