Where Do We Go From Here, 30 Years Later

By Rabbi Menachem M. Katz – Director of The Aleph Institute

I will never forget that Motzoei Shabbos standing outside Beth Israel Hospital. Even though there was no official announcement made, we knew. As police car after police car pulled up, we just stood there in silence, no one dared say a word. We were not even able to make eye contact with one another. We did not want to acknowledge that the unthinkable, unimaginable actually happened.

When the beeper went off and the message was displayed, no one had any idea what would come next. The group of bochurim standing in the street had never dared think about what happens after. The Rebbe was not just our father or our mother, the Rebbe was our life, our purpose of existence.

We were at every Tefillah, every dollars, every sicha, every kuntres. Every Shabbos by Farbrengen when the Rebbe said that all we had to do was just one more Mitzvah and Moshiach would come, we truly believed Moshiach was coming that week. We had no doubt. All we had to do was just go on Mivtzoyim, learn one more maamar, walk to a shul on shabbos to be Makhil Kehilos and Moshiach would definitely arrive.

When the beepers went off, life as we knew it ended. We did not know where to go, we had no idea what to do. The next 24 hours were a total blur. I remember just sitting down on a street corner near the hospital by myself just crying. Thank G-d, Shmaya Krinsky saw me sitting there and told me to get into the Rebbe’s car with him and his father. Someone came to the car to ask questions about the Levaya, Rabbi Yehuda Krinsky looked at him like he fell off the moon. He was not able to respond.

We followed right behind the ambulance carrying the Rebbe back to 770. After that, the next thing I remember is hearing the shrieks and cries as the Aron was carried out of 770. I have no idea how I got to the cemetery. I have no idea how I got into the cemetery and I have no idea how I got into the ohel. I just remember ending up in front of the Kever.

Somehow, I ended up in an SUV parked on Abraham Street and got back to 770 right after the Kevura. R’ Moshe Klein was in the car and I ended up getting into the Rebbe’s room with a minyan metzumtzom for the first Mincha of Shiva.

During the week of Shiva we just hung around on Eastern Parkway lost. No one could have imagined what would be in 30 years. Most of us deep down thought that Lubavitch would become less relevant and would be somewhat diminished. No one in their wildest dream could have told you during Shiva that Lubavitch would grow by leaps and bounds. No one could have dreamt that the bochurim of today would be more connected to the Rebbe now than we were then. Even though we were in the Rebbe‘s presence for hours on end every single day. No one could have imagined all the young couples moving to Timbuktu even though they never even met the Rebbe.

So where do we go from here 30 years later? We can pat ourselves on the back and say we did it. Everyone said we would disappear and look at what we accomplished. Chabad grew exponentially, from 1500 Shluchim in 1994 to over 6000 worldwide today. Schools, Shuls and Yeshivas continue to spring up across the globe, spreading Torah and Mitzvois and Chassidus.

Yes the Rebbe’s mission and vision is being fulfilled but do we still have the same devotion and connection? Do we live and breathe Rebbe?

We were mesmerized and enamored by the Rebbe. We were soldiers in the Rebbe’s army, totally Botul to the Rebbe and just wanting to be pawns on the Rebbe’s board. Now we are own entities. We want to be recognized and respected for our own accomplishments.

30 years later, Do we sometimes neglect to mention the Rebbe’s name when repeating a Sicha on Shabbos ? Do we always encourage all our acquaintances (even those that we don’t need anything from) to go to the ohel just to connect and not just when they have a problem? Do we have a weekly personal shiur in Lekutei Sichos and the Rebbe’s Mamorim? Do we write a Duch to the Rebbe on a regular basis? Do we stop and just think about how to strengthen our Hiskashrus to the Rebbe?

The Rebbe should not just be on the top of the stationary or a sign on the wall or a large photograph in the lobby of our Chabad House or the front room of our homes. The Rebbe should be our entire life, our “ Raison D’etre”.

The Rebbe has become at times like the Founder or the President Emeritus of our lives and our organizations. Yes, we check off the boxes, We learn Rambam. We say the Rebbe’s Kapitel, we show up for Gimmel Tammuz, our kids get engaged by the ohel. Chas vashalom, we have an issue, we are at the ohel in an instant.

But do we live Rebbe 24/7 ?

30 years is a long time and the nature of humans is that we subconsciously lose some sensitivity over time. As we come closer to 30 years Gimel Tammuz, let’s ask ourselves, Do we have today the same awe and respect we had for the Rebbe 30 years ago? 30 years ago we dared not even say a word to the Rebbe. Before we went by the Rebbe for a dollar or said Lechayim to the Rebbe at a farbrengen, we thought ten times, what would the rebbe see on our foreheads? We need to go back to having the same Yiras Hakovod and total Bitul to the Rebbe like we had 30 years ago.

Before we do something or say something, we need to ask ourselves, is this about the Rebbe or is this about me? Would I have done this or said this 30 years ago?

There are thousands of successful Kiruv professionals out there. Shluchim and Yungerlite are not Kiruv Professionals. We are soldiers of the Rebbe. We need to go back to being just a pawn on the Rebbe’s board and having the humility to acknowledge that Ashreinu Matov Chelkenu that we have the Zchus to be connected to Rebbe. Yes we need to be successful in fulfilling the Rebbe’s mission and the Rebbe’s Mivtzoyim but that is not enough. We must also ensure that everyone we come in contact with knows that we do all of this for one reason and one reason only. Because we our soldiers in the Rebbe’s Army.