Monday, 24 Av, 5781
  |  August 2, 2021

What We Cried About on Shabbos Gimmel Tammuz

Article by Rabbi Shmully Hecht about Shabbos Gimmel Tammuz 5781 at the Ohel: "Mashkeh flowed. The delicacies circulated. A nigun was sung. There were heartbreaking cries. Our bochurim are being rejected, yes, rejected by our mosdos." Full Story

The Rebbe Pushed off the Rain For Us

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Intention 5: A Glimpse Into Oholei Torah

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The only reason I am Lubavitch today
June 20, 2021 12:10 am

After WW2, my great grandparents couldn’t afford tuition
The only school who would accept my Zaidy was Lubavitch
Me, my siblings, my cousins are Lubavitch today and are shluchim spreading the Rebbe’s vision
Could one imagine how Lubavitch now a days wouldn’t accept if someone can’t pay the tuition?! How can we turn away a child because of money?! The Rebbe clearly spoke extremely passionately about the importance of Chinuch and its a moseids job to fundraise and accept as many children as possible!!

the insane commit suicide??
June 20, 2021 12:15 am

did i misinterprate?!
the pained, the crying, most delicate and beautiful neshomos that dont find a better solution or reason to continue fighting with this cruel world are the ones that so painfully choose that road…..

no words to thank you and the new vaad, may u be matzliach…
we are parents suffering results of cruel treatment to our kids from the mosdos…

Some roads are Dead Ends
Reply to  the insane commit suicide??
June 20, 2021 11:42 am

When rejected, some children start out on foreign roads. One road may have drugs, another road may be depression etc. Some of those roads are r”l Dead Ends.

Why don’t you work on redeeming also…
June 20, 2021 12:24 am

All the women of Lubavitch. No new female leadership or ideas are allowed to be brought to the table. The older generation will not move over or make space for new feminine thoughts or programs. It all starts at home. Look no further than the few power hungry women leaders in Lubavitch.

The older generation needs to make room
Reply to  Why don’t you work on redeeming also…
June 20, 2021 8:50 am

I absolutely agree with you but it is at every table…the women’s. the men’s, everywhere! The school systems are so caught up in looking Chassidish with the people ate the helm having certain last names. Ba’alei teshuvas/converts have something to bring to the table but because we don’t have the right last names we are nobodys. We have completely different lenses than FFB’s. We’ve been in the world. We chose yiddihskeit! We have something to offer that those with fancy last names wouldn’t even think of. But every ba’al teshuva/convert knows that your last name is usually the most important… Read more »

Off beat
Reply to  The older generation needs to make room
June 20, 2021 11:47 am

Many wonderful bt and converts are still growing into their new lives. The ideas they bring are often off beat. They themselves will, at a later stage, admit this. On fact, they contaminate their children and even grandchildren with the the off beat remnants of their past. There is good reason to keep them away from the table of running communal institutions.

Reply to  Off beat
June 20, 2021 3:29 pm

For that reason, mosdos should have a vaad, rabonim to consult etc.,
On the other hand, óften times we find the BT to be more sincere, well-meaning, less into politics or ‘how things will look in the outside etc.
So keep these wonderful people off the table?? Systematic racism?

Old school
Reply to  Off beat
June 20, 2021 6:31 pm

Unfortunately many of the ‘old school’ got many harsh ideas from other frum communities such as boro park and williamsburg instead of basing everything on the Rebbe. We end up with our own version of ‘unorthodox’

on beat
Reply to  Off beat
June 20, 2021 9:16 pm

I have many friends who are bts or children of bts. they are among the most wonderful, frum, people that i know. they are not in any way off beat

June 20, 2021 12:31 am

Really impressive poetry skills

Agree he need to write Novels
Reply to  Dovid
June 20, 2021 1:49 am

So well written and ennoble to read.
Pls continue maybe open your own column or page? Blog?

I feel like I was there too
June 20, 2021 12:44 am

Thank you for sharing your journey, thank you for the Chinuh reforms for our system. No child should be rejected. Chabad CH kids are our future. One data base to apply and get into the school in general, or mesivta /high school /etc based on the academical achievements only, regardless family yihus & financial needs. Pls, create one educational system for all school teachers, Rebbes and Morahs where they can share thoughts, the issues, and get professional support from pediatric psychologist and other pro of how to deal with a situation and how to approach the kid and uplift him… Read more »

Thank you for addressing
June 20, 2021 1:23 am

Thank you! My son, a very good boy with NO issues, didn’t get in to a mesivta, for lack of space. We only applied to one, and farher was right before pesach. His father didn’t teach him the gemara well enough, as he didn’t realize it was so important as he is a good boy. Now, all yeshivos are full and not accepting applications. So should we send him to local misnagdish yeshiva??

Did you check them all?
Reply to  Thank you for addressing
June 20, 2021 1:52 am

I know of mesivtas that take late applicants, did u really look? Or are you despairing early

Great option
Reply to  Thank you for addressing
June 20, 2021 7:29 am

Machon Aharon mesivta. An amazing new program opening. Email [email protected]

Thank you for addressing response
Reply to  Thank you for addressing
June 20, 2021 8:27 am

Pls reach out to our vaad at [email protected]
Our mission statement is to ensure that every bochur has a place in a lubavitcher mesivta that is suitable for him
As we say no family will be left behind
Yacov Barber on behalf of the vaad

Reply to  Thank you for addressing
June 20, 2021 9:12 am

He has divine providence to study Tanya in a different school with one who would not, otherwise.

Thanks for speaking out
June 20, 2021 1:42 am

Yeshiva and schools are a problem. But you can easily swap the “yeshiva” word with “Shlichis “. For so many years hundreds of yungerlait tried to get Shlichis and weren’t accepted, weren’t good enough , Didnt have enough family money , weren’t related to a head shliach etc so went into business or left the fold for not being “ good enough “ or a shliach, yet nobody spoke out. There were no conversations about how to get unconnected yungerleit shlichis places.

Hypocritical one may say…..

JJ the Ice Cream Cake Decorator
Reply to  Thanks for speaking out
June 20, 2021 2:52 am

I fully agree with your comment. Sadly, many of our own were rejected and have left the with a very bad taste in their mouth. There needs to be a fair system. Nepotism and the like and not healthy for a community.

Sooo many places!
Reply to  Thanks for speaking out
June 20, 2021 7:35 am

There are SO many available shlichus’n! Just be open to it. There aren’t any big cities waiting for you to make the headlines, but get out there and join a mosad. That’s what’s (mostly) necessary today

Yashsr Koach
June 20, 2021 1:48 am

Wishing you alot of hatzlacha, this is definitely needed and spot on.

Yael Brummel
June 20, 2021 6:54 am

Incredible. Wishing you much hatzlacha .

What are you talking about?
June 20, 2021 7:08 am

Our local CH mesivtas accept everyone. It’s the out of town ones that don’t either because the bochur isn’t easy to deal with or because they want triple the tuition. We have been so happy with our local CH mesivta.
Staying local for yeshiva has so many benefits.

Yael Brummel
Reply to  What are you talking about?
June 20, 2021 9:57 am


Clarity please.
Reply to  What are you talking about?
June 20, 2021 2:14 pm

I can attest (because I was part of the hanhala in a CH mesivta) that the worst place for a young Bochur is to stay in crown heights, Parents do not see what actually goes on in Crown heights. You are out of touch…

Chinuch more critical than Shlichus . Heresy??
June 20, 2021 7:19 am

Gasp how can I say that ? Because EVERY child needs a yeshiva and NOT EVERY couple needs classic shlichus. We need to return to the eighties when the Rebbe stressed endlessly that we CAN MAKE WHEREVER WE ARE a shlichus. But a CHILD? a child needs chinuch in a good moisad. And our Moisdis need to SHAPE UP and INSPIRE our kids . How many more of our kids do we need to lose ?

Reply to  Chinuch more critical than Shlichus . Heresy??
June 20, 2021 10:10 am

Shlichus really begins earlier. When still at the CHILD level! Getting accepted into camp as a staff member! Getting a pessach shlichus as a bochur! Getting sent to yeshiva on shlichus! Connections! Nepotism! Arbitrary “qualifications “! Points! Schlep! Influence! That is part of the head mosdos “system”, and when si shtinkt foon kop, the feet smell too. This entrenched behavior of rejecting children on “beginners” shlichus trickles down to the branches of the educational system in various cities who follow the example set by the tree’s roots and main trunk. Children rejected by leading camps, rejected for pessach shluchus, rejected… Read more »

Our girls?
June 20, 2021 9:47 am

What about for our teenage girls? What school can they go to when they don’t want to dress tznius anymore and start heading out? The longer we keep them in our community, the bigger chances of them keeping a certain level of yiddishkeit.

Camps too!!!
June 20, 2021 9:48 am

Consider summer camps too!!! Why do summer camp applications require to know “mother’s maiden name”? Does it matter to determine acceptance of child if mother’s maiden name was McDonald or Schneerson?! They also need to know occupation of parent. Why? Does it matter if father is a melamed, business executive or in jail?! Does it matter if mother’s is a make-up artist, morah or fashion model?! I get it they want to investigate the child before acceptance – so speak to child’s school, the rov of shul, references, but why the need for checking yichus?! It stinks! When camps are… Read more »

What’s with the new fad
June 20, 2021 10:10 am

When applying my son to yeshiva The constant reply is we’re full Every yeshiva is full They want you to call back in a few weeks and they’ll see if they could squeeze you in Why do parents have to beg and call and beg and call again and keep getting the same response as of now we’re full but I’ll see what we can do Until mid summer when they call back to say yes we have room for your son Like what’s the point of making parents stomachs turn?! What is parent suppose to tell their son? As… Read more »

Reply to  What’s with the new fad
June 20, 2021 11:28 am

Early pre-season the manager of the baseball team doesn’t know yet who he can recruit. Some potential players will be given immediate offers, others will be put on hold, till closer to the season, when the manager and coach can decide if this player is still wanted or not…

Oh, you’re talking about yeshivas? OK, I won’t rewrite, just switch a few words around like menahel and Rosh Yeshiva for manager and coach.

They all play the same game.

We don’t have an option to stay in high school
Reply to  Game
June 20, 2021 1:27 pm

If you apply for few mesivtas ( paying full non refundable application/registration fee) and got rejected- your son has Zero chances to go to any school system. Even in college you have at least three choices and at least can choose the last one …

June 20, 2021 11:20 am

Seminaries play an even more vicious game of mi yichyeh u’mi yamus. Standing like the infamous Gestapo doctor directing who should go to the right or to the left. Cesar give the thumb up or thumb down. So do the seminary directors.

Very disrespectful
Reply to  Seminaries
June 21, 2021 8:53 am

Please don’t compare any of this to the Nazis. Show some respect !

Girl's Mother
Reply to  Very disrespectful
June 22, 2021 8:01 am

When a seminary rejects the acceptance of a girl, they shecht her. It is her personal Tisha B’Av.


The pain is intolerable.

She feels her life is over.

My daughter fell into depression and was suicidal. She needed medications to stabilize – and she transformed from a happy-go-lucky, bright carefree girl who brought sunshine into the room and always smiled and laughed, into a gloomy sad dark person.

Maybe the earlier poster shouldn’t compare it to Gestapo and Natzi, but I compare the seminaries acceptance/rejection with “mi yichyeh u’mi yamus”.

Reply to  Seminaries
June 21, 2021 11:30 pm

As a bucher making the transition from mesivta (mainstream) to zal which no confirmed place for next year I will say like this the fact of the matter is that you can not compare seminary is a recent invention a bocher has to be under a hanohola as the rebbe says also so many girls go to seminary only to realize what a mistake they have made also for a girl who opts out of seminary has multiple options in preschools shlichis cause girls are generally more reliable at this age boys just end up stocking shelves and rachmana litzlan… Read more »

June 20, 2021 11:26 am

Thank you for addressing this important point. I would say however, that the issue starts much earlier than at the point of being kicked out of a yeshiva. That’s already very late in the story. Being proactive would be to create Yeshivos that have options for kids so that we don’t try to fit a square peg into a circle. Not all kids are struggling in Yeshiva just because they have learning difficulties. Some kids just can’t or aren’t interested to sit all day learning Gemara and other yeshiva subjects for so many hours. They need some variety. And, not… Read more »

Reply to  Parent
June 20, 2021 12:52 pm

This is the best comment yet

Ohr Temimim in Toronto
Reply to  Parent
June 20, 2021 5:23 pm

Ohr Temimim in Toronto is exactly what you describe. A chasidishe Mesivta for boys who take Yiddishkeit seriously and offers Limude Chol with an accredited High School diploma

A good start
Reply to  Ohr Temimim in Toronto
June 20, 2021 9:47 pm

Nice to know. Unfortunately too late for my son. But schools like this shouldn’t be few and far between. And also- there should be American options like that as well. It’s time to start thinking more along these lines… my son is not in the tiny minority. There are enough boys who need more options.

Reply to  Ohr Temimim in Toronto
June 22, 2021 8:06 am

Ohr Temimim is NOT in Toronto. The mesivta of Toronto is Yeshivas Lubavitch (mesivta and zal). Ohr Temimim is north of Toronto at Chabad of Flamingo (which is even further north than the Thornhill community), it is around an hour drive due north of the Toronto mesivta. It was opened to cater to parents of bochurim that wish their children to pursue continued secular education of high school (and beyond).

Reply to  Ohr Temimim in Toronto
June 22, 2021 5:01 pm

We really need a chassidishe university for boys who take yiddishkeit seriously. Like a continuation to Ohr Temimim…

Slippery slope
Reply to  Like
June 23, 2021 12:18 pm

If secular education of high school is accepted as “chassidish”, why stop there? Why not also accept as chassidish going to college? (Of course not in a co-ed college, maybe something like Touro with Tanya courses to make it chassidish).

Like, where are the boundaries?

Very good point
Reply to  Parent
June 20, 2021 6:54 pm

The non mainstream chabad schools cater to students who dont really want to learn much of anything and its frustrating to serious students who want to learn everything. They want Torah but they also want to have other skills in order to succeed in life and support that Torah lifestyle. Other yeshivas figured it out but they aren’t chabad or near crown heights

Absolutely not
Reply to  Parent
June 21, 2021 11:38 pm

היפך כונה עליונה who are you to decide that your child will be a a balabos no that’s for him to decide after being taught all about the amazing responsibilities that our generation has on shlichus and by deciding not to expose him to a pure education that shows what the world SHOULD be just cause you would be uncomfortable if he made the decision that his life goal should be in accordance to the rebbes wish is a very boxed in education but if he want to work I will tell you many ppl are super successful without limmudei… Read more »

Waste of time to a very simple solution
June 20, 2021 11:36 am

Open more Yeshivos! In the last 27 years Lubavitch has grown tenfold. Yet, the Yeshivos have not. There simply needs to be more spaces. NO Vaad or anything can solve this problem. More Yeshivos need to open.

100% Correct!
Reply to  Waste of time to a very simple solution
June 20, 2021 1:08 pm

We need more yeshivas, seminaries, summer camps! Even the “good boys” have a hard time getting into Mesivta.
Chinuch–it’s the new frontier!
And it will take a LOT of MONEY!

Waste of time to a very simple solution
Reply to  100% Correct!
June 20, 2021 2:06 pm

That is right, what most people don’t realize that even the “good and connected” are having a very hard time getting in. The landscape has changed. There are simply more students that need to go to out of town Mesivta’s than there is space. Camps seminaries etc. all the same. Open more Mosdos you will see the problem get much more manageable. Then to deal with the Students that the Mosdos don’t want to accept, that’s a whole other story. But don’t lump to issues together. How is any Vaad meant to deal with this issue? YES! there is a… Read more »

Camp tuition
June 20, 2021 11:50 am

Why in the world is Chabad Summer camps so expensive
Our kids are dropping out because they have nowhere to go for the summer

The older generation needs to make room - response
June 20, 2021 11:51 am

We need all the input advice and help we can get. It makes no difference if your name is smith or shmidt. In fact as a dayan on the Melbourne Beis Din I can categorically say that our best teachers in the geirut program where former geirim themselves. Because if truth be told only a convert can understand what a prospective candidate is going through. Similarly I once had a conversation with a Baat Tshuva and he remarked that it is a lot easier for him to remain frum then a FFB. Since he knows that the world out there… Read more »

Nice article..but
June 20, 2021 12:19 pm

People cant just raise thier kids any way they want and any lifestyle they want and then cry – why dont our institutions accept them

( not talking about the author -dont know him )

Really some can’t get access to the preschool
Reply to  Nice article..but
June 20, 2021 1:31 pm

It’s so hard for BT to get children access to anywhere here and only using connection … we are CH residents – with limited choices and finances are pushed out of CH very often … so Shliah made me Chabad, I believed in Rebbes chinuh but my kids born to frum family of BT parents are really struggling to get accepted to any, not talking about privileged mesivtas …

Reply to  Really some can’t get access to the preschool
June 20, 2021 8:10 pm

Unfortunately this is true and it makes no sense. Why do shluchim bring ppl to chabad and then leave them hanging?

Did you ever ask them?
June 20, 2021 1:18 pm

have you ever sat down with such a child who went through our institutions and asked them what turned them off? Every good company uses customer review/feedback as a way to improve and grow/change. We need to start doing the same. Those children will tell you they were turned off by a cold teacher, indifferent/abusive parent, and occasionally because nobody was willing to answer their philosophical questions; they were simply told, “have faith and don’t ask so questions.” If you want to see change we need to make the change. – Levi Rapoport

Mesivta Solution..
June 20, 2021 1:33 pm

There’s so many batei chabad which have large facilities.. mainly really used on shabbos or high holy days..
can have a Mesivta at their place..

so many talented Chassidish yungerleit seeking jobs.. capable of teaching…

So why not have a Mesivta by chabad house and recruit yungerleit and start a new Mesivta.. there’s tremendous need..

Reply to  Mesivta Solution..
June 20, 2021 4:04 pm

Are you out if your mind? I once allowed a mesifta to use my beautiful spacious chabad house for ONE month of the summer. They destroyed the place! The mess and damage was unbelievable! It cost me not just money for restoration but also ballei batim that were turned off by the bochurim’s behavior. Imagine if they used the place all year round?! As for me, no yeshiva is welcome to my chabad house, even for a shabbaton.

noch einer
Reply to  Shaliach
June 25, 2021 3:32 pm

the REAL problem is the permissiveness that is pervasive in our yeshivos. If we would only seriously enforce the rebbes takanos about underage drinking and excessive drinking. We should really imitate the non Chabad yeshivos as far as these policies and allow no drinking under Any circumstances. Drinking is the gateway to so much more. Truth be told these טייערע בחורים act like vilde chayos.

Tremendous injection
Reply to  Mesivta Solution..
June 21, 2021 11:40 pm

Of Chayus and life to a chabad house

Why only mesivta
June 20, 2021 1:58 pm

This is an issue with zal and shlichus afterwards as well. Those with the right names and family connections have no issues – it doesn’t matter what the bochur is up to. He gets in. He gets shlichus. It’s all about have the right connections. Period. And no one frankly gives two pennies about your kid. They just want money and power.

Reply to  Why only mesivta
June 21, 2021 11:05 am

I am from a no name BT family. My son worked hard, was enthusisastic, studied, kept seder and had no problem getting into yeshiva and a very desireable shlichus. We are not rich or well known

noch einer
Reply to  Exception
June 25, 2021 3:35 pm

“My son worked hard, was enthusisastic, studied, kept seder”
Thats why he had no problem.
The yechidim who ignore the trend and work hard shine through.

Parents need to do what's right for each child
June 20, 2021 3:33 pm

It is so important that parents choose the right school for each child. Yes, it may be easier or more comfortable for parents to place them in the mainstream schools but that is not necessarily what is right for the child. It also needs to be recognized that the classroom setting and ratio of 25 kids to one teacher that worked for yesterday’s children and chinuch is not necessarily right for today’s children. Definitely most kids MANAGE in that setting however that doesn’t mean that they are truly succeeding and thriving as much as they can. If a child is… Read more »

A parent
Reply to  Parents need to do what's right for each child
June 20, 2021 5:04 pm

It would be nice if there were different options for our children so that we can actually have a choice to make. There needs to be some open-mindedness into the type of curriculum and expectations we put on our children. Not just taking this same curriculum and trimming it down, or giving kids more free i.e. wasting time, to ease up the school day. Sometimes there need to be other options in the curriculum. Not just “dumbing down” the same curriculum. Kids shine in different areas of learning. We need schools that provide various areas of relevant learning that will… Read more »

so true
Reply to  Parents need to do what's right for each child
June 20, 2021 9:21 pm

this is the best comment. i would upvote 100 times if i could

June 20, 2021 3:34 pm

Mesivta is $18,000 USD per year. Can someone explain to me why it cost $18,000 USD? What in the world cost that much? There is an out of town Mesivta/Zal on the east coast that boasts 250 Talmidim Bli Ayin Hora, and they charge $18,000 per student! 20 years ago, that same Yeshiva was taking Bochurim without charging a nickel for tuition. In came a new administration and made it into a business…. How is this acceptable??? These same “volunteer” administrators come to the Kinus Hashluchim as if they are contributing to the Rebbe’s vision! What has happened to the… Read more »

Private schools and universities
Reply to  Shliach
June 20, 2021 4:09 pm

Do you know the tuition costs of private goyish high schools or universities? Now add dorm and food charges in goyish schools! It’s closer to $50,000 per year!! So $18,000 including dorm and high priced kosher food is a bargain. – A menahel of East coast mesifta

Reply to  Private schools and universities
June 20, 2021 5:00 pm

most families sending their children to non jewish schools dont have ten – twelve children. in most cases the parents have well paying jobs and are not working in koidesh. unlike a typical chabad family. parents working in koidesh, you have several sons in yeshiva at the same time. eighteen thousand times three or four for just for four out of your ten children (who are going to school as well and tuition needs to be paid there as well) and there is no money left for anything else. there has to be another solution,. comparing ourselves to the goyim… Read more »

Prívate tuition
Reply to  Private schools and universities
June 20, 2021 5:14 pm

Do you know that the people sending their kids to those private high schools and universities don’t have the same set of circumstances as most Lubavitch parents? A) they don’t have the amount of children we have B) they may have been able to save for many years toward high school or college while their children were in public school, getting a free education, while we have been paying for it all through the years C) Many people sending their kids to those private high schools and colleges have much higher earning power than the typical Lubavitch parent. Yes, some… Read more »

Prívate tuition
Reply to  Prívate tuition
June 21, 2021 3:20 pm

It should be noted, that the reason why we have large family’s, choose to live in this expensive neighborhood and send our children to yeshivahs is a direct result of what these vary same yeshivahs have brought us up to believe is correct.

If you are going to preach this stuff it is your responsibility to support it.

To do otherwise would be hypocrisy!

You can’t compare
Reply to  Private schools and universities
June 20, 2021 6:11 pm

You can’t compare a tuition cost for a university to our Yeshiva’s. If you want to say it cost that then fine, but we all know with that amount of kids it doesn’t cost 18k. it’s more like 12-14k max!

Reply to  Private schools and universities
June 20, 2021 8:27 pm

Complete Nonsense. Universities have thousands of staff and a huge campus and billions in investments. We are not talking about University, we are talking about Yeshiva, which every Jewish child is entitled to it. Its a birthright. The school i am referring to has a total of 9 teachers, that includes Chasidus and Nigleh. The staff are getting paid low salaries, (the administration says that its Shlichis and the teachers need to “sacrifice”) yet when it comes to the “needs” of the administrators and their family, no expense is skipped. Sadly the institutions are no longer non profit, they have… Read more »

Reply to  Shliach
June 20, 2021 4:26 pm

Oh sure, talk about institutions like you know all their figures and expenses.

Also, care to name said mesivta?

I’m not aware of any east coast mesivta with more than 140 students.

Reply to  Tabloider
June 20, 2021 9:41 pm

Yes, despite learning in OT I do know a little math. 9 staff members and 250 X 18,000 = $4,500,000! You tell me where the money is going. There is no discount for large families, Shluchim or Melamdim. This institution started as a Mesivta and now boasts a zal as well. I am specifically not naming the institution but CHANGE MUST HAPPEN. Rabbi Shmuli is correct, our responsibility is not only to Yidden in far flung corners of the earth, our collective responsibility is to give each Jewish child a proper Chinuch Al Taharas Hakodesh. Enough with school administrators who… Read more »

Fortune 500
Reply to  Shliach
June 23, 2021 12:14 pm

Yep, despite learning in OT you have discovered that yeshiva business is a Fortune 500 company. Would you invest in the shares/stocks of a publicly or private-traded yeshiva? Because I can suggest a few yeshivos that could use your investment!

This is great
June 20, 2021 4:14 pm

One of the greatest hatzlachos of Lubavitch we are able to attract gray learners from other yeshivos not Lubavitch etc like brisk mir the kollel in Denver etc. unfortunately with that they brought into Lubavitch the concept of boutique yeshivos And that’s where the trouble started As one Rosh Yeshiva called a friend of mine and said please send your bochur to us tuition will be close to free The father asked wow what’s this all about The Rosh Yeshiva said we are opening a Yeshiva for metzuyanim The father gave him a 3 word chasidishe blessing and said I’m… Read more »

Great learners started with Alte Rebbe
Reply to  This is great
June 20, 2021 4:40 pm

Alte Rebbe only accepted super superior students! Don’t tell me thus idea was imported to Lubavitch from outside yeshivis like Mir or Brisk. Fake facts!

Reply to  Great learners started with Alte Rebbe
June 21, 2021 12:43 am

Different times, different generation. The attitude of kaltkeit that exists in our moisdos today is unacceptable.

Menahel of East coast mesivta
Reply to  Sorry
June 21, 2021 8:59 am

“Different times, different generation” – do you get to pick and choose what applies today and what applied only to that different generation?

Do you think Tanya is also from a “different times, different generation”?

Some use that dangerous one-liner to justify not keeping kosher or turning on lights on shabbos.

Reply to  Sorry
June 21, 2021 9:09 am

Intellect (as in Chabad chassidus) is definitely more on the side of katlkeit when compared to Chagas Chassidim (Polish) who thrive in emotional varmkeit and loud excited davening…maybe you should visit Breslov, Bobov or the hundreds of other chassidic courts.

June 20, 2021 4:47 pm

Huh? You might be unaware that the Rebbe would bless young bichurom to become a Chosid, Yirei Shomayim, and…(don’t faint, you ready for the shocker?)…LAMDON. The Rebbe wanted LAMDONIM, aka “metzuyanim”…that is being “chaassidish”…literally as the mishneh says: lo am Haaretz chosid! You can’t be a chassidishe am Haaretz! (Just as one cannot be a frumeh shaygetz).

Reply to  Chayal
June 21, 2021 3:26 am

I’m pretty sure lamdan is diligence not brilliance

Menahel of East coast mesivta
Reply to  Mistaken
June 21, 2021 9:01 am

One who is dilligent and spends 18 hours a day trying to master the alef bais is not a lamdon by any definition. Yes, he is extremely diligent, exceptionally determined and praiseworthy, but not a lamdon.

The solution is from the outside
June 20, 2021 6:26 pm

Look how tzivos Hashem and chidon changed the schools. We will need that same kind of thinking to change the mesivtas and yeshivas

June 20, 2021 6:42 pm

I’m not chabad but I feel the pain many parents have in today’s generation. In Brooklyn yeshivas like Mir,Chaim Berlin,Chasam Sofer and others are losing students because so many families are moving to Lakewood or Monsey areas. Maybe they can take in chabad boys as some have a twenty percent empty space.
Also you need mentors in crown heights as so many youngsters are falling between the cracks. Today with Internet many kids are being influenced by the secular world.

The other side
June 20, 2021 8:41 pm

I taught in a mesivta for a few years. One of the big issues was, how to teach a bochur who has no interest in being in yeshiva or no interest in learning Torah?
The yeshivas can’t be dragged down to their level (besides for the ones that are specifically catering to such bochurim)
It’s a very complicated issue that I don’t know the answer to. But it’s ridiculous to vilify the hanhalas

My Son
June 21, 2021 5:06 am

One of my sons had trouble starting in cheder. He was not a behavioral problem. He had add. The inexperienced young teacher and menahel did not know how to handle this. We did what we could at home. Saw doctors, therapists etc…We made the painful decision to put him in a non Lubavitch day school. He thrived. When it came time for mesivta, the local Chabad Mesivta would not consider him because he did not have a strong background in gemmora. So, he went to a more modern mesivta. He thrived, was put in honors and AP classes and graduated… Read more »

Lucky boy
Reply to  My Son
June 21, 2021 3:06 pm

All I can say is thankfully you are his parent. You obviously did the right thing. If there is ever a blessing in disguise, it is that he was not accepted into Mesivta. Good for you that you put your child first and I hope you don’t look at it as an unfortunate circumstance. You should really pat yourself on the back for the hard choice you made. It is unfair that you had to make it, but the unfortunate reality is that most parents don’t make the hard choice and that is unfair for the child. Good for you,… Read more »

Great Article
June 21, 2021 9:32 am

I loved your latest article on COL! We were having the same conversation this Shabbos in Shul, especially in light of this week’s Living Torah, were Shloime Cunin recounts that when one of the heads of CGI came in to Yechidus prior to camp and told the Rebbe BH camp is full and we have a waiting list. The Rebbe responded a waiting list! How much time is there to camp and they said a week, the Rebbe said thats enough time to build new bunkhouses and so they did. Any Yeshiva with a waiting list is questionable if it… Read more »

The simple solution
June 21, 2021 2:59 pm

I congratulate the author for bringing this up as it is touches on the most significant topic facing our community today. It is unfortunate that the same schools that proclaim to be the Rebbes Mossid which claim to educate our children in line with the Rebbes teachings don’t support the very ideals they espouse. The large family’s we were brought up to work towards cannot afford to pay tuition. The child that falls a little out of line is rejected from the system etc… and the list can go on and on. At the end of the day the solution… Read more »

Menahel of East coast mesivta
June 21, 2021 4:17 pm

A commentator “Shaliach” asked above:
“despite learning in OT I do know a little math. 9 staff members and 250 X 18,000 = $4,500,000! You tell me where the money is going?”

Let me answer with a question:
If running a yeshiva is SO profitable, it is such a lucrative business, potentially earning over $1 million annually in profits, why don’t YOU do it????

Answer: Because you would be bankrupt before the year ends.

Enough said!!

I run the budget
Reply to  Menahel of East coast mesivta
June 21, 2021 6:16 pm

Cost more than 9 salaries of staff. The buildings (learning and dorms), insurance sky high, maintenance, food and more food and unlimited food bills, kitchen cook and staff, janitorial services, repairs, free bochurim shluchim, broken chairs and tables, seforim and replacing torn seforim, extracurricular activities, dorm counsellirs, bookcases, beds, furniture, programs and prizes, chayanu, l’chaims, the ones who we accept at steep discounts or free, the endless mortgage, rent, bank loans, secretaries, bookkeepers, accountants….the list goes on forever.

Negative Influencers
June 21, 2021 9:58 pm

“He’s a good boy – just he can’t learn all day.” Then he will pull down the boys that do learn all day! In Kuntrez HaChinuch the Freirdikeh Rebbe writes that a student that is a bad influence MUST be removed from the Yeshiva. A bad influence does not require drug use. Enough if he isn’t into learning all day. A smart yeshiva won’t accept him.

June 21, 2021 11:50 pm

This may sound a drop intense but it is not directed at any person or organization in specific but the amount of money wasted on absolutely ridiculous things such as weddings that we know the rebbes shita on we can take so much money from the community in order to fund the opening of new schools camps seminaries and Yeshiva‘s and to maybe pay teachers A respectable some so young couples don’t dread the idea of working in a yeshiva And this will encourage the expansion of existing most doses operations so like this although it is a great merit… Read more »

Reply to  Suggestion
June 22, 2021 10:32 am

Yep, blame spending on “ridiculous things such as weddings”, not the fancy cars, luxury bungalows, or the sushi platters!

The amount of sushi (at $2 a piece for a spoonful of rice with slivers of vegetable or fish), the money spent on it in our community, can support fully more than one yeshiva. 

Reply to  Wedding!
June 23, 2021 12:11 pm

Sushi is the new kreplech, varniskes and holpchas.

To paraphrase the saying: Those who ate the sushi of Tomchei Tmimim will do not die without teshuva.

A different take....
June 22, 2021 4:23 am

Sometimes, our kids are rejected for vindictive and nasty reasons that have nothing to do with last names. We withdrew our sons from a Yeshiva due to physical abuse from staff and tried – yes, TRIED- to get one into a local Yeshiva. We were turned away constantly, and eventually sent him to the Cheder at the Ohel as a last resort (Best.. Decision. Ever!!) FF to his chassaneh and the first principal confessed he dafka sabotaged our attempts to get him into the Yeshiva we first wanted. He had told the principal not to accept him because he wanted… Read more »

A different take....
June 22, 2021 4:34 am

PS: no doubt there are readers who will say, See? It all worked out, gam zu l’tova,it was meant to be, etc. No, it wasn’t meant to be… not the heartache, the crying, the physical illness that it all caused… Obviously, he went to a school that was great for him, but the cost to our neshamas was huge. And why should we forgive without any acknowledgement & accountability to us? My son forgave them, that was his choice. We were never given that option. “Educators” need to be open and honest, not deceitful. If the first principal would have… Read more »

Reply to  A different take....
June 22, 2021 6:29 pm

“Karen” entitlement. As if the yeshivos owe you something. They made a mistake by accepting your son, Now you point fingers at them. It’s a good thing that the first yeshiva tipped off the second about you. Typical Karen, thinking everyone owes her everything.

$18,000 Tuition
June 22, 2021 6:40 pm

Do you know that admission to Disney Land for a 5-day pass is $72/day?

$18,000 divided by 250 days of yeshiva is …$72 day.

Yeshiva tuition is like going to Disney Land.

Choose where your son fits better and send him there.

not [yet] a lubavitcher
June 22, 2021 11:01 pm

reb shmully:
wow ! u can write! may u continue…
this is so sad and unfortunately its not exclusive to Lubavitch or crown heights.

although im an outsider [….but old enuf to have received a dollar from the rebbe.]
but as i understand
the rebbe said ” tut altz” and thats what your doing ….
but perhaps your next step is to take things into your own hands
and YOU open moisdes for the kids you write about!
bimakom she’ein ish ….

June 25, 2021 7:44 pm

Lots of talk. No action.
While life goes on. Unchanged.
THAT, my friend, is reason to cry.