What is it like to be a Chabad emissary? How does a couple leave a place of Torah to settle and build up a strange and often hostile “wilderness”?
The Avner Institute presents the fascinating reminiscences of Rebbetzin Bassie Garelik of a childhood in the 1940s and 1950s, when the idea of “spreading out” was still outrageous; her encounters with the previous and current Rebbes, to whom her family was devoted; and her long shlichus in Milan, Italy, where a vibrant community was created.
“This Beautiful Heritage”
Although we have grown accustomed to the revolution that is shlichus, the fact that thousands of the Rebbe’s emissaries are out there is no less incredible. When shluchim were first sent out, it wasn’t like it is today, when there are dozens of couples waiting for a position. Back in the 50s some people rejected the very idea of shlichus, saying their wife wasn’t interested or their mother-in-law protested.
Bassie (Posner) Garelik was an exception. Not only did she express her willingness, she yearned for shlichus. She was born into that world, with all the difficulties and self-sacrifice shlichus in America entailed, yet she knew that when she married, shlichus would be her whole life. The only question was where she would go.
Today, after over 50 years in Milan, Italy, Rebbetzin Garelik can bask in four generations of shlichus. Her shlichus with her husband Rabbi Gershon Mendel Garelik was given special treatment by the Rebbe; she was kind enough to share some of her experiences.
Born to Shlichus
I was born and raised in a family that was all about shlichus and the Rebbe. So neither the concept nor reality of shlichus was foreign. My parents were sent to Pittsburgh by the Previous Rebbe (Rayatz), and they lived and breathed the Rebbe every minute of their lives. Fortunately, they bequeathed this beautiful heritage to their children.
My parents didn’t need to make speeches or give orders. They simply lived lives of self-sacrifice for the Rebbe’s principles, and this was amidst the raging secularism of America of that time. We children absorbed their dedication.
When I got married, it was only natural to go on shlichus. I had grown up with all the problems of kashrus, environment, and outreach. I’ll give you an example so you can understand what kind of home I grew up in.
In 1946, Rabbi Shmaryahu Gurary (the Rashag), the Rebbe Rayatz’s other son-in-law, asked my brother and another yeshiva student (Mendel Baumgarten) to go to Europe to help our people who had just left Russia. My brother was 21 years old and in the middle of rabbinic studies, which my mother wanted him to finish. You have to remember, in America back then there weren’t many yeshiva students, and since it was the son-in-law, and not the Rebbe, making the request, my mother was not at all receptive.
My father said he would phone the secretariat in New York to find out what this was about. I remember the moment, as though it happened yesterday. My mother was standing in the kitchen and crying, finding it hard to accept the idea of her son’s leaving yeshiva and traveling to Europe. My kid brother (R’ Zushe Posner) and I were playing in the kitchen, while my father was on the phone with the Rebbe Rayatz’s secretariat.
When my father hung up, he said only a few words: “It comes from the Rebbe.” That is all it took. My mother dried her tears and her face changed instantly. If the Rebbe said so, then there was nothing to discuss. It would be done, and happily too.
My mother was an extraordinary woman, completely given over to the Rebbe. Although, since 5748 (1988), the present Rebbe rarely attended funerals, he did leave his room, when my mother passed away, in order to accompany her coffin.
Generally, whenever the present Rebbe did attend a funeral, he did the following: walk near 770, cross Kingston Avenue, walk another few meters, and stop at a certain point where he would wait until the coffin and accompanying cars passed by. Then he would return to his room. At my mother’s funeral, the Rebbe walked until the corner of Kingston and Eastern Parkway and remained there for nearly a half hour after the coffin went by. On the video of the funeral, you can see that the Rebbe looks like he is in another world. On my mother’s gravestone it says, “She was dedicated to live all her days according to the instructions of the Rebbe shlita.”
My father was also a big Chassid who merited becoming one of the first shluchim. When, in 5702 (1942) my father wrote to the Previous Rebbe about the many difficulties, the Rebbe answered: “You reap and sow, and I will pour tears so it will grow.” When my father once wrote that there weren’t always people to listen to him review Chassidus Shabbos morning, the Rebbe answered: “You must always review Chassidus, even if there is nobody present. Arrange the tables and chairs and review Chassidus as though people are sitting there.”
Audiences
Growing up in a Chassidic home, I not only visited the Rebbe Rayatz but merited audiences with him. My first took place when I was twelve. I remember entering the Rebbe’s room with my mother (who herself had many audiences with him) and feeling totally dumbstruck. When the Rebbe asked me something, I didn’t answer. When the Rebbe asked my mother whether I understood Yiddish, my mother said, “She understands but she’s overwhelmed.”
Another audience took place with my entire family on the day of my brother’s wedding, in Kislev 5710, a few weeks before the passing of the Rebbe Rayatz. Although the Rebbe spoke, it was difficult to understand him, so my father repeated what the Rebbe said, word by word. Because my older sister was also getting married, a week later, the Rebbe spoke to her and warned her of the evil inclination. Then he spoke of the importance of wearing a wig (although even before the audience she was planning on wearing one). After the audience, my family went to Rebbetzin Nechama Dina for her blessing.
The Flying Wedding
In 5711-12 (1951-52), at the beginning of the present Rebbe’s leadership, my parents sent me to high school and seminary in New York, since there was nothing for me in Pittsburgh. I lived with relatives in Williamsburg, and on Shabbos we walked to Crown Heights to attend the Rebbe’s farbrengens. The women’s section was tiny; I remember that on Rosh Hashana 5714 (1953) barely fifteen ladies were there.
In 5718 (1958), I became engaged to my husband, Gershon Mendel Garelik, and the wedding was set for Sunday, 4 Tammuz. My husband, who was learning at 770, wanted to get married in New York so the Rebbe could officiate. I had always anticipated a wedding in Pittsburgh, knowing how important it was for “our town” to see a Chassidishe wedding. Nevertheless, I too wanted the Rebbe to officiate. After much deliberation, we decided to have the actual ceremony at 770 and the wedding meal in Pittsburgh.
On the Shabbos before the wedding, there were three grooms at 770. When, after the service, the parents of the grooms asked the Rebbe to farbreng, the Rebbe agreed, answering, “After all, today is 3 Tammuz (the day the Rebbe Rayatz was actually released from Soviet prison.)” To the best of my knowledge, this was the first time the Rebbe publicly referred to the special quality of that day. He discussed the topic of marriage and mentioned the customs of the Rebbe Rayatz at his daughters’ weddings.
Our wedding began in the early afternoon. The reception took place at the home of Rabbi Jacobson. At around three we went to 770, where the actual ceremony took place in the yard, with the Rebbe officiating. Afterwards I went back to the house and changed my clothes, and we went straight to the airport to catch our flight to Pittsburgh.
Apparently, our pilot was encountering Chassidim for the first time in his life. When we arrived at the airport, a group of students from 770 who were not going to the wedding in Pittsburgh had gathered to accompany us with song and dance. They managed to get all the way to the boarding place, where they celebrated with us until we actually boarded. Earlier that day, another group of students had driven to Pittsburgh to participate in our wedding over there. When we landed, they were waiting for us at the airport, singing and dancing. The pilot, seeing this, asked in amazement, “How did they get here so fast?”
The wedding meal was extremely modest. In those days, there was no catering, and my mother and aunts did all the cooking. At the yechidus before the wedding my mother had told the Rebbe the meal would be modest, in order to avoid debt. The Rebbe, pleased, said, “If only others learned from you and did the same.”
Buon Giorno!
Right after the wedding week, we went to camp Gan Yisroel, where my husband was the learning director. In Elul, we went to the yeshiva at Newark, New Jersey, where my husband was temporary advisor. We had written to the Rebbe that we wanted to go on shlichus and were ready to go wherever he sent us.
We eagerly awaited an answer. It came a short time later.
Secretary Rabbi Chadakov phoned my husband and asked if he was willing to go to Europe. My husband immediately agreed, and then asked where. When Rabbi Chadakov asked him why that made any difference, my husband answered, “I don’t have official papers, and I’m not sure we can enter just any country.”
Rabbi Chadakov said, “To Milan, Italy.”
On Motzaei Simchas Torah 5719 (1958), my husband went past the line for kos shel bracha, a cup of wine the Rebbe customarily poured into a Chassid’s for blessing. To my husband the Rebbe gave a bottle of liquor and said, “For overseas.”
A few weeks later, on Sunday, 11 Kislev, we left for Italy. The day before – Shabbos VaYeitzei – the Rebbe farbrenged and spoke about the idea of shlichus, which then was still quite radical, so our going created a great excitement among the Chassidim there.
The next day, shortly before leaving, we had another audience with the Rebbe and received special instruction: the purpose of shlichus is to hasten the coming of Moshiach. The Rebbe gave us copies of Tanya to distribute to Friends of Lubavitch in Milan, and another Tanya, “because you never know whom you’ll meet in flight” (which was a story in itself).
When we left the Rebbe’s office outside 770, we were met with a festive goodbye party in our honor, and the dancing went on for quite a while. Suddenly we noticed that the Rebbe had been standing and watching the entire time. We quickly got into a cab that took us to the airport.
We first arrived in France, where we stayed for a week until our visas were arranged. A week later, on 19 Kislev, we arrived in Milan, where a letter from the Rebbe was already awaiting us. Later on, we also received Chanuka gelt: two dollars from the Rebbe, which back then was quite unusual.
We felt that the Rebbe was with us on this shlichus and that we weren’t alone. This feeling only grew stronger as time went on.
At the Yud-Tes Kislev farbrengen, the Rebbe mentioned my husband and said, “Today Rav Gershon Mendel Garelik arrived in Milan.” Then he told a family member to make a toast for us.
That is how it was throughout that first year of shlichus. At every farbrengen, the Rebbe told a family member to make a toast in our honor. Later that year, the Rebbe sent us a tape of the Yud Shevat and Purim farbrengens.
Honorable Mentschen
In the summer of 1959, we opened camp Gan Yisroel, the first one in Europe, which the Rebbe described at the 13 Tammuz farbrengen in a special way:
“On the chag hageula, 13 Tammuz, Rav Gershon Mendel Garelik, with all the distinguished titles he deserves, along with his wife, the Rebbetzin, with all the distinguished titles she deserves, opened the first Gan Yisroel in Europe, in Italy. From this we see how much can be accomplished, as the Midrash says, ‘One of you exiled to Barbary . . . it is as if all of you were exiled.’ Just one couple went, and they started a school for boys, a school for girls, and classes for adults, etc.
“What all the Chassidim of Europe could not accomplish – along with the bulk of Chabad – they accomplished. A girl born in America and a boy born in Russia . . . Hashem makes matches and He had them meet in the U.S., and then sent them ‘wandering’ to Italy. There they accomplished all the matters of the world, and they have yet more to do, in a way of ‘you shall break forth west and east and north and south.’ He didn’t have a penny with which to buy the camp, but it was bought with loans. There were no children [registered] for the camp, but with strength, with a strong hand, with a great hand, and with an uplifted hand, he gathered children, and now they are full of joy, along with their parents.
“Thus, in the environs of Rome – ‘from the destruction of Jerusalem was Tzor filled,’ which refers to the Kingdom of Rome – a Gan Yisroel was opened on 13 Tammuz 5719, a Shmita [agricultural] year, in order to spread the wellsprings, in such a way that through the children, the parents will be affected.”
Reading Minds
Beginning with the Rebbe’s 70th birthday, I began going to 770 every year for Yud-Alef Nissan. Beginning 5748 (1988), following the Rebbetzin’s passing, the Rebbe gave discourses and distributed dollars in his house. That year, as usual, I went to him for Yud-Alef Nissan. I was staying with my daughter when we suddenly heard the siren go off, announcing that the Rebbe was about to say a sicha or give out dollars. So we ran to the Rebbe’s house and stood in line with everyone else.
Noticing at the size of the crowd, I assumed each person would briefly pass by the Rebbe, who certainly wouldn’t pay me any special attention. When our turn came, I went first, got a dollar, and continued walking. Then my daughter went by with her son. The Rebbe said something to her and she continued walking.
Then Rabbi Klein called me back and repeated what the Rebbe had said to my daughter: “Apparently, she thinks I don’t recognize her.” Then the Rebbe turned to me and said, “It seems to me that you are in doubt as to whether I recognized you.”
So if anyone wonders whether the Rebbe reads minds, here’s your answer.
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