By COLlive reporter
Leading Sephardic leader and halachic authority Rabbi Ovadia Yosef made an impassioned plea this week to teachers not to expel children from schools and yeshivos, even if they exhibit negative behavior.
“Even if there is a student who behaves inappropriately, it is still forbidden to throw him out of school and instead we must exercise extreme patience,” he said in a video posted on Kikar.net and VIN News.
“Toiling in the field of chinuch is indeed work and we have to be patient with each and every student. If we are patient with this student, one day he can grow up to be a talmid chacham. And if we send him away from the yeshiva where will he go? …What will become of him?”
He said the act of expelling a child is a life or death situation, and cautioned listeners that in the days of the Sanhedrin, it took a group of 23 sages to decide on matters that were classified as “dinei nefashos.” He warned mechanchim that as individuals, they lacked the authority to make decisions that have such far reaching ramifications.
“Don’t throw them out!” exhorted Rabbi Yosef. “What, are you throwing away a rock? These are neshamos! Are you ready to take responsibility for what might happen? We must love these children who will one day become our gedolim. We need to bring them closer with sweet words so that we can bring them closer to the Torah.”
While these words made headlines in the frum community, COLlive was told that the topic will not be raised in the upcoming summer conferences for Chabad educators organized by the Chinuch Office of Merkos L’inyonei Chinuch.
“It’s not an issue we need to rehash,” the director Rabbi Nochum Kaplan told COLlive.com. “The Frierdiker Rebbe said a student should not be thrown out – ever – because it’s dinei nefashos. Throwing out a child is murder. It’s simply killing the child.”
He said that nowadays, “the vast majority of our mosdos implement this policy. The Rebbe told me that there is never a reason to throw out a child because he has a problem – that is your task as a teacher, to deal with it.”
The only exception to this rule, he said, was if a child is negatively influencing other students and the situation is not amenable.
“Yet even when that is the case, the Frierdiker Rebbe said that a single person should not be making the decision. It should be the hanhala or a few educators deciding,” Rabbi Kaplan said.
“In addition to that, Rabbi Mordechai Hodakov said that when the decision is made and a child is being thrown out, it is your responsibility to find another school that will take this child,” he added.
What will be discussed at the summer chinuch kinusim is “basic classroom managment skills,” a topic that is interconnected with Rabbi Yosef’s speech where he extolled the virtue of patience, stressing its importance for those in the field of chinuch.
“If anyone thinks he or she can go into a classroom and ‘wing it’, they are making a major mistake,” Rabbi Kaplan said. “And patience comes from confidence and organization, which can only be achieved by preparation.”
Registration for the summer chinuch kinusim is now open for male and female teachers and principals (separate conferences) at chinuchoffice.org
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chabad only expels students when they dont pay tuition
There’s no question that while the roshei yeshivas are applauding themselves, there is, indeed, no accountability to either their communities or their funders. I propose that our yeshiva system initiate a “litmus test” with certain “factors” that have to be viewed publicly. For instance, each school should be assessed for: academic achievements (with clearly defined goals), Yiddishkeit achievements (with clearly defined goals), teacher accountability (with clearly defined goals), student attitudes (with clearly defined goals) and parental support (with clearly defined goals). And like the online lists of doctors and hospitals, graduates (or expellees) should rate the institutions with a five-star… Read more »
A bochur in ZAL in a prominent Chabad school, a yiras shomayim, keeps sedorim, vechulu vechulu, is expelled from the school because he wouldn’t “understand the shiurim of the rosh yeshiva”. We don’t expel trouble makers? We expel the good kids who can’t (by themsleves) make a leining. It shouldn’t be happening. But it is. So where’s the leadership? In the 60’s and 70’s they expelled nobody and MOST now are bringing up frum chassidish families. What happens to the bochur today and all those like him? What kind of families are they going to bring up? Where’s the ahavas… Read more »
parents should make sure to raise their kids with proper manners and don’t just drop them in the yeshiva.
“Some” of those kids are really chutzpa and can really bother and intimidate others.I don’t believe that by staying in yeshiva is also the answer,because most of them don’t change.If the yeshiva feels that they cann’t serve this kind of kid, at least they are being honest and the parents should accept reality and do the best to deal with the child immediate needs .
my son is a chassidishe boy to the best of his ability, sincere, enjoys school, not rebellious and yes we pay full tuition. He’s ready for zal and so far 3 yeshivas in a row told us – No sorry, we can’t take him because he is behind in gemorra. Sorry he doesn’t fit in. Sorry we can’t accomodate his learning level. So yeshivas take boys with better learning skills who don’t really want to be there and boys who want to be there, can’t get in. The real problem is no accountability on the part of the yeshivas, and… Read more »
The statements being made here are so so simplistic and naive as to border on the complete ridiculousness . This is the gravest issue facing our movement and STILL no one is REALLY dealing with it . On the one hand , I challenge any person to a 5 min. conversation where i will convince them of MANY situations where the child MUST be kicked out – and they will agree. On the other hand ,Lubavitch is not seriously addressing the issue of the kids who don’t “fit” in. When was the last time that Rabbi Kaplan sat in a… Read more »
My son was definitely expelled from lubav yeshiva. It was a trauma that no one truly recovers from. Are the rabbis older and wiser now? I hope they understand the damage they do and become Baal tshuvahs.
TOTAL DENIAL!!!!!THE YESHIVOS ARE A MONOPOLY
Every yeshivas is throwing out at least 5-10 students a year, I was kicked out of three yeshivas, it’s sad how they can say, “we don’t kick kids out” total BS
can someone give me a number to reach rabbi Kaplan?
as a teacher, I know how we talk about students. This one is not the way we want, get rid of him/her. Please who is taking responsibility for our kids? IT is easier to just throw out and not have to deal with it and go home and watch your shows. Rabbi Kaplan? Principals? Who does a parent go to to discuss this. There’s a school i know that is the quickest to throw kids into the street.
There appears to be a HUGE discrepancy between the theory “We don’t expel students” and the practice. Rabbi Kaplan needs to answer to all those MANY bochrim who were thrown out of yeshivos and bear the scars, how that happened if we don’t do it!
Our schools are perfect, our children are mentschen, our teachers are kind and don’t hit or patch, and to top it off no funny business happens!!!!! We heard the call from the Frideker Rebbe and we followed through. Nothing is wrong here in our Lubavitch… …………………………….. Except for the hordes of fried out gheze youth who get tired of being abused by teachers, or beat up by teachers, and see the cracks in the system and become disillusioned. Except for the rampant discrimination in shidduchim which we whine about like children when there are options, but, they happen to be… Read more »
How dare a teacher or principal decide to “throw away” a neshama. Look at how this policy has backfired. Why are there so many kids off? I say that the home is responsible for the way kids act. They see and hear the parents believes. However It is 100% the fault of the school for throwing them out.. If a child is thrown out he will say the heck with you and do the wrong thing. If we had teachers who cared about the kids and not just a job, there would be less kids thrown out. Why does the… Read more »
i mean, some would consider bad language a negative influence, others would say improper dress creats bad social norms, and yet some would only consider real dirt to be something wrong. it all depends on what your standards are.
so, wheres the line? this is not a question of nuance. if you cant answer this question, then you have basicly said nothing.
so please, rabbi kaplan, answer.
Please change it that Lubacitch Schools today DO expel children.
Both my sons were expelled for being ‘different”. (a little out of the box)
Its sheker gamur to say that chabad does not expel kids.
Years back they would work with everyone and now the yeshivos just want the elite – or the bochirim that they don’t have to work with.
My son was expelled from a Lubavitch CH school for a few days. Its a SICK punishment and the teacher was a fool.
One’ man’s decision has caused girls to leave thi sschool because of BORDER-LINE “tznuis” issues-GOOD girls who might have come out more chssidish if the hanoleh would have worked with them.
They have now gone to modern Zionistik schools and will probably not remain Lubavitch in the future..
Oh for shame!! This is certainly not our way!! Whoever makes these decisions will have a lot to answer in the world to come!
I was disrigarded from Mechina Layeshivah in a large city not for being a truble maker purli becouse i was unable to learn at their pace, that was 30 years ago I will never forgive them as they still do it today, we see children being distroyed becouse they (the hanholah of the mechina) want to be elitest. well now only H’K’B’H can forgive you whom call yoursellfs Chasidim
It is not so simple that you wipe off the teacher. It’s subject matter, length of lessons, type of lesson, ability of child, background of child…..so much goes into educating a child to be a Yeirei Shomayim, mentshlich and motivated to do well in every aspect of their life.
I was expelled from school and it had nothing to do with disturbing the class or influencing the children.
It had to do with a “Rabbi” and his hot temper.
And it was a school with the Lubavitcher Yeshiva name.
1)99% of the time the child being expelled isn’t destroying other neshamos. the teacher simply doesn’t know how to deal with him. The solution should be training the teachers, which hasn’t been a focus in our schools.
2)There are other consequences to not behaving besides for expelling a student. for some students it is a prize to be expelled.
When the Aliya from Moroco started, many children came to learn in Kfar Chabad. The children were not behaving and disrupting the classes. The teachers complained to Rabbi Efrayim Wolff A”H,who wrote to the Rebbe asking what to do.
The Rebbe’s answer was quick to come ” Take in more”
The obvious answer to this problem is not the child, but the teacher. He has to know how to “Teach” a class of “CHILDREN”
its a one man decision, because he thinks he knows best.
the elder rosh yeshivos are getting older, and are letting younger men do the work, and i personally know many friends, who are being thrown out the system because of these ignorant people.
and i must say, once youre out the system, its a long, long way back, and these bochurim have to be very strong.
so sad how these things happen
Asa parent we must be involved totally in our child’s chinuch. Chinuch is not only academic. It is also behavioral ,emotional, skills that we as parents and we as educators must model and teach to our children/ students. We must build confidence and even pride in one’s abilities. As parents and educators if we do our job as needed there will be less of a chance of having children expelled and chas v’shalom going off the derech. As parents we must be more involved with our teachers, We are partners. Children feel more secure, more responsible. when they know their… Read more »
its been a while since i was in yeshiva so i cannot tell you whats happening there today. im just wondering when did this magic change happen
I personally was kicked out of 3 yeshoivas because I didnt keep seder, and it was a one man’s decision.
oh, how chabad is mekarev the rechoikim and meracheik the kroivim.
azkir al hatzion.
Money is ok to through your children to teach poor parents a lesson
In the past 20 years, HUNDREDS of students have been expelled and/or told not to return in dozens of yeshivos. Maybe there are parallel worlds, one where the Merkos Chinuch Office exists and the other where the schools and students are. The quote could be painfully true, though “It’s not an issue we need to rehash,” Right. It’s an issue you need to touch and address for the first time, not rehash. This Yeshiva is for Masmidim. This one is for chassisidhe boys. This one is for Shluchim. ETC. I’d say, that if you want to carry the name Chabad,… Read more »
amazing stuff here !
If this is an official “policy” and it becomes “forbidden”, then you have just enabled misbehavior for students. If they know it is “forbidden” for the school to throw them out, they have all the power and the educators have none. What an upside down world.
To many times this exact behavior of not moving the trouble child out of the school will kill the neshamas of the other children. It teaches them that its okay to not be a mentch because there is no real consequence. Wonder why so many kids think the Rabbis are a bunch of hypocrites and they fry out? Parents don’t take getting their kid under control seriously either because again, no real consequence.