VIDEO:
Check out his album “Kosher for the Omer.”
Here are the lyrics:
I don’t eat animals not my style
It’s been that way for quite some while
But if there came a time when I changed my mind
I would only dine on the kosher kind
No camel, hyrax, or rabbit meat
They chew their cud but got the wrong feet
Don’t eat no pig rolling in the mud
Spilt hoof but he just doesn’t chew his cud
I don’t endorse eating donkey, of course
Serve your husband horse and that’s grounds for divorce
Giraffes are kosher but how the heck
Do you know where to shecht on an eight-foot neck
I keep the laws of kashrut, my jaws
Don’t touch no flesh from a beast with paws
I don’t eat no bear, no canine dogs
No weasel, porcupine, or hedgehogs
No feline cats, no mouse, no rats
No creep bloodsucking vampire bats
No monkeys, and no chimpanzees
And I won’t eat you so please don’t eat me
I don’t eat animals not my style
It’s been that way for quite some while
But if there came a time when I changed my mind
I would only dine on the kosher kind
I get sick just thinking about carrion picking
Buzzards and vultures, I’d stick with the chicken
Got no craven for ravens and crows
I’m saving my appetite if you’re serving those
No penguin wing, and no emu leg
I don’t want no scrambled ostrich egg
No parrot, no matter how you prepare it
Spare it, I’ll just snack on a carrot
Take a bite from a bagel but not from a seagull
No kite, no hawk, no falcon or eagle
I’m ona diet where I stay away
From all kinds of raptors and birds of prey
No fowl like an owl, with the big eyes staring
Won’t see me tear into the flesh of a heron
No piece of stork on the end of my fork
Cause that white meat’s kosher like a piece a pork
And I don’t eat animals not my style
It’s been that way for quite some while
But if there came a time when I changed my mind
I would only dine on the kosher kind
I don’t eat no creepy crawling things
No lizard legs and no insect wings
No slithering snakes, and no wiggling worms
Crawling round on the ground getting covered in germs
I’m no anteater I can’t stand bugs
No spiders, no centipedes, no slugs
I’ll pass on the cockroach, thank you, please
I’ll take some honey, you can keep the bees
No scorpion with the poison tail
No escargot, I don’t eat snail
Never had frog legs like they do in France
I wouldn’t try that treif if I had the chance
No amphibians, no reptiles
No salamander, newt, toad, turtle, crocodiles
Feed me chameleon, I think I’ll scream
And my face might turn from brown to green
Cause I don’t eat animals not my style
It’s been that way for quite some while
But if there came a time when I changed my mind
I would only dine on the kosher kind
I’d only eat sea food with fins and scales
No walrus, dolphins, or humback whales
No seahorse, sea lions, sea snails
No crab legs, no red lobster tails
No manatees, like the Japanese
No nasty sea urchin sushis
Sorry, I don’t do calamari
Squid and octopus isn’t for Ari
Peanut butter, no jellyfish
Put one in bowl and I’ll break the dish
No prawn, no krill, no shrimp, I still
Never had crawdad, don’t think I will
I don’t make my meals with Moray eels
No oyster, shellfish, or elephant seals
No great white, hammerhead, when I swim
I shark might bite me, but I won’t bite him
Cause I don’t eat animals not my style
It’s been that way for quite some while
But if there came a time when I changed my mind
I would only dine on the kosher kind
keep it up
well, this BT who did not grow up on rap (way too old…….) really enjoyed this tremendously (especially since I was a vegetarian for about 13 years pre-frum, I could totally relate to the whole thing) ya’asher koach!
that was amazing!!!!!!!!!!!!!
You are exactly right about the Giraffe thing.
I am learning ACTUAL Halachos over COLlive comments…
Pretty fascinating man!
Keep on going…
But just remember, “But if there came a time when I changed my mind..” that will be very soon, when Moshiach comes, because you’re gonna want to eat the shor habor, no?
You is good.
my dad is a shochet and what you siad is completly correct
when he is in cleveland, he really inspires our whole shul with his amazing songs!
Simanim would snap?! Ridiculous. We don’t eat giraffe for exactly the same reason that the people around us don’t eat it; where would we get it? Even in Africa people don’t eat giraffe, so why would we eat it? But if we wanted to eat it, and could get one, there would be no halachic problem at all.
get a life
to have a jewish singer with some actual talent.
very cute
bs”d
if i understood corectly when ti was explaind to me, it was because since there neck is at a slant and the “simanim” are stretched they wold snap before you coukd get 1/2 in, and chek them.
Sweet singin’
He is very talented! I just wish he would write a new tune to rap with. Each song has the same tune and beat.
We had a great time with Ari when he preformed in Los Angeles with Moshav on Purim. Check out his Aishes Chayil:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ifGEmNogZvA
Keep up the good work Ari!
Sholom B. Feigelstock
great job
The reason why we don’t eat them is because it’s hard to get (expensive and rare) meat and it’s very hard meat.
Your reason given concerning the mesora is only true regarding birds. We only eat fowl with a mesora. This is not so, however, with regard to animals. In order for a behama and chaya to be Kosher, all they are are the simanim of split hooves (mafreses parsa and shisa gisa) and chewing their cud (maaleh geirah). Mesora is not a requirement. A giraffe HAS both of theses simmanim, and we DO KNOW where on their necks to shect them. It has been done before, just do some research! Nobody eats them because it is impractical to make giraffe meat… Read more »
the resone why giraffes are not kosher is because we only eat kosher with mesora and the was no girrafs in israel
“Giraffes are kosher but how the heck
Do you know where to shecht on an eight-foot neck”
Always brings a smile to my face
such a smooth and tastey song !!!
cool cool nunununununun!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
LOL