By Menachem Lubinsky, Editor of KosherToday.com
The modern-day version of security in a shul (synagogue) includes keeping the Torahs in a safe, but more recently some synagogues lock away their tzedakah (charity) boxes and yes, alcohol left over from a Kiddush.
In one shul, several teenagers were seen sneaking into a “locked” kitchen cabinet to consume alcohol left over from a party, leaving in a totally drunken state.
We live in an age where some of the most expensive bottles of wines and spirits are kosher. I have often celebrated the existence of so many quality wines from around the world that are kosher. I have friends that consider it a privilege to spend $200 and more on a bottle of good wine but they know their limits.
Consuming moderate amounts of alcohol is very much a part of Jewish law, custom and tradition, but so is discipline and responsibility.
In a generation that has become accustomed to consuming better foods and wines, there is a need to control the young compulsive “alcoholics” who confuse our tradition with irresponsible behavior.
Everyone enjoys a good Kiddush but no one is the happier seeing a drunken teenager on a Shabbos afternoon. Like everything else in life, moderation is an important word as is responsibility.
While we are blessed with an unprecedented array of wines and spirits, this should never be confused with irresponsible behavior when it comes to drinking.
Today hayom yom discusses fabrenguens i thought it wohld be intresting to bring it here: Hayom yom: 24 tishrei A public farbrengen in general, and on Shabbat or motzo’ei Shabbat1 in particular, is one of the foundations in the ways of chassidim and Chassidus. It is an opening and entry-way to the fundamental Mitzva of ahavat Yisrael. At the great majority of farbrengens, the principal speakers demand of the participants to improve their conduct and practices, to designate times for the study of Chassidus and keep those times diligently, and that their study be directed to learning and fulfillment. (The… Read more »
Its not the parents fault, but its also not the kids fault. We have to blame the yeshivah system, giving our kids alcohol is NOT OK!! Last year on a shabbos in yeshiva there was a fabrenguen and the mashpia decided to continuously pour my 16 year old son lchaim, i understand that it was in a chasidish way and the mashpia wanted my son to “get more involved”… But the hanhalah had the chutzpah to call me sunday morning informing me that my son is in trouble and has to pay a 200$ knas for getting drunk! Somone has… Read more »
Why do men drink on Simchas Torah? Because we just started saying mashiv haruach. Let the spirits flow and the gashmius will come down. Since bachurim don’t need to worry about parnassah, they don’t need to drink on simchas Torah.
As a bochur i can tell you that i have some freinds who say lchaim and some that dont and at least from what i see the kids that always drink the most and “koch” in it are kids that their parents were always on top of them and watching their every last move so when they come to yeshivah and see the world outside of their living room they go insane, it starts of slow and goes more and more untill it reaches a point where it gets out of control. Then theres the kids who their parents were… Read more »
I witnessed one of my new friends in a publicly drunken state in a Lubavitch shul. The other men laughed it off.
I thought it was disgraceful. They said he always gets like this on the holiday. Perhaps, someone can cite how Jewish religious law forbids over-indulgence so as to provide a religious deterrent.
This would not happen in a conservative shul.
Please reread the post by number 6. There’s laws against giving alcohol to anyone of any age less than the legal drinking aha. There’s some hefty fines if you’re unlucky enough to get caught. This is for the entire country. So….guess what. Crown Heights is NOT exempt. Doesn’t matter what you think, the law is the law and maybe people should start obeying it.
It is very sad for me to see, first hand, the inside scoop of fellow Jews suffering from alcoholism. Often times, but not always, the truth comes out in the doctor’s office. Most of the time it is quite surprising, since these individulas, mostly, seem to be ‘regular and normal’ people on the outside, but in reality they are struggling with hell on earth…
If only people knew how prevelant alcoholism is in our community.
If only you really knew what’s going on with your next door neighbor…
Awareness is the first step to the cure!
Can you please back up what you are saying in the name fo the Rebbe with a source? There are many places where the Rebbe speaks about the gzeiroh, vechulu, but I have not yet seen or heard a place where the Rebbe says anything about the age of 18.
Do you have a source?
If not, please be careful when quoting the Rebbe.
Gut Yom Tov.
I believe you are mistaken this stuff that’s happening now happened back then as well, just we didn’t know about it there were no social media no websites no WhatsApp Instagram or any other way to let each other know the reason it’s a big deal now is because we live in the information age
As a Bochur who is currently in yeshiva, its not the alcohol per say the the problem. Of course there are the general materialistic temptations that we have towards the alcohol, but its not really that. Its 99.9% peer pressure. There will be the one or two bochurim who are seriously addicted and since its not really legal in most yeshivos they make it into a whole rebellious game on who gets to come with the ‘cool group’ to the side of the building or that one locked room to say lchaim. And many guys feel left out, and want… Read more »
I do not know what was exact ruling of the amount age of Lachayim that the Rebbe ruled was okay.
What I do know For Sure is Alcholic distroyes Marrieges and The Rebbe certainly did Not Hold Off ANYONE Getting Drunk.
To# 8 The fact that he may have done it when he was your age does not make it to right. 2nd maybe he acknowledge that it was wrong and try to teach others not to make the same mistake so the smart ones will listen and try to make adjustments in their life this silly ones will always look for excuses
Listen,we just didn’t have rampant alchoholism, addiction,divorces,OTD…. back then. Of course these issues always existed but today addiction and addictive substances need to be dealt with totally differently.
As a teenager in the community I can say that what your saying in mistaken bcs as we all know our parents were doing the same thing when they were teenagers and so were you… and now so are WE so don’t come and make issues regarding this topic bcs it’s and old and stupid topic.
I don’t think you know what’s going on at all.
You just live under a rock.
as a bochur i agree 100%
from an adult pov its a bad but you have to understand that we have temptations and dont say you didnt when you were our age cause thats false or else u couldve been into something else
Alcholic in Marriage or any relationship is a recipe for Disaster.
The Rebbe did not want boys under 18 should not be drink at All .
Over 18 little shnapes cups by a Simcha or Special Event .The situation is out of Control.
Penalties for Providing Alcohol to a Minor. Adults and minors who give alcohol to a minor also face a stiff penalty. The punishment for making alcoholic beverages available to a minor is a class A misdemeanor, punishable by a fine up to $4,000, confinement in jail for up to a year, or both
I must highlight: back in the day teenagers were also into alchohol and yes one day they grew out of it. It’s perfectly a normal and healthy thing for teenagers to tempt alcohol. The mode we adults make a big deal out of it the more the teens will make a big deal and it really should not be a big deal. We were all once upon a time that age and understand this. This in no way is an excuse for teens stealing alcohol, just a perspective on the broader issue
How important this message is. Today’s generation has been so influened by materialism it’s shocking.The most Chassidic homes be it in williamsburg or elsewhere the rush to gashmiyos is becoming out of control.
My son went to yeshiva (no name calling) and he came back a full fledge achohlic.i mean every day he goes with friends and comes back DRUNK.and all he says is that it’s tishrei and it’s fine.i recently decided to send him to a therapist for this issue.and guess what right after that therapy literally a few hours later he was drunk.lubavitch is not what it used to be. PSA:yeshivas pls stop letting buchorim (especially at a young age) consume this amount of achohol maybe start serving grape juice by farbrengans or maybe when they get older some wine and… Read more »
Thank you for posting
Our small shul has become a drinking party. The so called kiddish club lasts from layning to after services. The rabbi rambles on forever after having a few himself. More men are out drinking than in shul. Rabbi says at least they come and if he abolished this club no one would come to shul There have been more than one brawl. I have almost stopped coming to shul. If the rabbi doesn’t care no one else does.