Rabbi Avrohom Flint Remembered at Shloshim Event

By COLlive reporter
Photos: Menush Amit/COLlive

Family and friends of Rabbi Avrohom Flint OBM gathered at the Jewish Children’s Museum Monday evening for an event to mark the Shloshim – 30 days since his passing.

The MC was Dovi Minkowicz and Tehilim was said by Rabbi Flint’s grandson Uri Greenfeld.

Speakers at the event included Rabbi Shlomo Zarchi, Rabbi Michoel Seligson, Rabbi Baruch Jacobson, Rabbi Motty Lipskier, Rabbi Avrohom Gerlitzky, Rabbi Levi Baumgarten, Rabbi Shmuel Light and Rabbi Yossi Kamman.

Speakers paid tribute to Rabbi Flint’s humility and wisdom, his love of learning Torah and his devotion to teaching Torah and Chassidus, reviewing the Rebbe’s Farbrengens for others each Shabbos.

He was also known as a person who was sensitive to all, a true Chossid, and fully immersed in the Rebbe’s inyonim.

Also mentioned was his dedication to the Rebbe’s Mivtzoim which he always made time for, as well as his dedicated work for the Crown Heights community in his work for the CHJCC, making sure the needy of the community received the help they needed.

In honor of their grandfather’s shloshim, all the grandchildren learned the lines of the Frierdiker Rebbe’s Maamer “vezuhi avodas hachasidus” by heart, something the Rebbe requested and Rabbi Flint encouraged his family to learn. Each in attendance received a laminated copy with a magnet.

His grandson Moshe Minkowicz recited “vezuhi” and grandson Mendel Flint, who learned often with his grandfather, spoke and made a Siyum. Chezky Raskin made a siyum as well.

VIDEO: FULL EVENT REPLAY

His daughter, Mrs. Rochy Flint – Kamman, wrote the following about her father:

Reflections on My Abba

I felt it appropriate and befitting to share some words about my Abba on the solemn occasion of his shloshim. While it is extremely hard to articulate my thoughts in a few pages, this is just the beginning.

How can one express the depths of love, emotion, and pain in losing Abba, and moreover how can one do justice to Abba’s legacy in mere words? While there is something pure in the unspoken or unwritten form, that would be unfair to Abba, as Abba was one to always share words in the appropriate moment. His memory requires a written transcription, however inadequate.

To describe my feelings, one analogy I can try to relate to thus far is a concept in the field of mathematics in which I study, topology. Topology studies the properties of spaces that don’t change if you stretch or bend them, but only if you create a tear. From this perspective, as we progress with age and our bodies encounter growth we remain inherently the same, unless we add holes to our bodies (a piercing will change one’s topological structure1). When Abba passed away, a hole formed inside me that has changed my fundamental structure forever.

I look at my couch and Abba is not there in his Tallis and Tefillin — davening barichus as he would so often do. He is not at my dining room table with sefer in hand. Nor is Abba in my kitchen sitting with a coffee and pastry, while my children talk to him. When I walk down Eastern Parkway I look for Abba walking to Yagdil Torah. Similarly, when I walk down Kingston Avenue I expect to see him walking to 770.

I am one child, the fourth of thirteen, yet each one of us has these special memories. Abba gave us all of himself, his presence as if we were the only one, and the appreciation of being a true Chossid here to serve his Creator.

At Shiva my siblings and I learned something very powerful about Abba which underscored his uniqueness: His ability to make each person feel like they were very important extended to many others, not just the family. Many visitors expressed admiration for Abba’s love for their favorite subject or topic. While Abba apparently knew the subject matter quite well, he evidently made it his “favorite” when speaking to that particular person about what they enjoyed. His favorite subjects were Gemara and history. After this occurred several times, we realized that Abba met people at their interests, leaving them with the impression that Abba shared in their favorite topic. That Abba was one with tremendous talent and depths of knowledge in many topics was known to us, but that each one thought their topic was Abba’s favorite truly epitomizes the sensitivity he had.

My Abba was a constant support throughout my life. As I embarked on my academic career path, Abba often would introduce me with pride to others as “Doctor” (I have a PhD in mathematics). Yet our conversations were strictly about learning Judaic subjects, family life, and of course, some political discourse. During my undergraduate commencement celebration at Columbia University, after all the congratulatory speeches from world renowned leaders and being inundated by streams of congratulations, Abba told me, “I want you to remember that this isn’t the most important thing in the world.”

I recall laughing and replying, “I know this is not the most important thing, but it’s nice.” In retrospect, what Abba was saying was much deeper— while proud of all forms of accomplishments, never did he lose focus on emes, on what is truly important. The way he raised us allowed me to learn the subjects I enjoyed, build the career I desired, while keeping true to my values and knowing what’s most important— Jewish family life and making this world a dira betachtonim.

Towards the final months of his life, Abba and I became Chitas chavrusas. While his body was weak, his mind was still “בור סוד שאינו מאבד טיפה” – “a wellspring of knowledge which does not lose a drop”. As I would mispronounce a word, he’d gently correct me2. Sometimes his eyes would be closed. He would look asleep to anyone observing, but I would read a posuk and ask him to continue, and with eyes closed he would recite the rest. I would tell him I didn’t really understand what I read, he’d explain– precisely, elegantly elucidating the content for me. It was remarkable to observe that even in his final weeks, while on a ventilator and seemingly unconscious, once I began saying Chitas he would start furrowing his forehead, open his eyes, and become alert, concentrating on the words of Torah.

Abba taught us how to live life by example, by just being who he was, an emesdike father who lived a life of Torah, a life of a Chossid, and a life of family. As many noted, he was a master teacher. This was true outside the home, and even more apparent inside the home.

I would like to share a few invaluable trademarks of Abba we can all learn from:

● Abba was always with his children, whether going to shul, engaged in community peulos, school board trips, teaching, tutoring, etc. He would regularly invite a child to join. We always had Abba time. Leaving the house was not about finding his alone time, but rather getting alone time with a child.

● Abba made a big deal about upcoming birthdays— we always felt special. “Guess whose birthday is coming up?” Is a question you would hear frequently as the day of your birthday was approaching. We loved his brocha of “shnas hatzlocha”.

● Abba showed up for the children and grandchildren events: birthday parties, school events, areinfernishs, siddur parties, graduations, etc.

● Abba always had a sefer in hand, whether sitting at the table, sitting on the couch, or lying in bed.

● In his later years, Abba started a tradition of distributing $5 or $10 (depending on age) at 5pm on the Sunday after Shabbos mevarchim, it was a cute addition where the children would come say hi, share something they learned, and receive gelt.

● No matter how sophisticated his mind and the depths of his intelligence, which were remarkable, first and foremost was Abba’s unquestioning kabalos ol. There was no trying to logically explain your way out of doing something that was a chassidik minhag.

● Abba would encourage all to take pride and responsibility in their family lineage and history. He imbued us with a warm appreciation that we are descendants from the Alter Rebbe and the Mitteler Rebbe.

● Abba celebrated the “mundane” in life, making each day feel connected and special.

Abba has a litany of accomplishments and roles he served outside the home, that’s for others to share, but being his daughter and knowing inside the home I can say Abba—you did well!! All of us are honored for the zechus to be Abba and Ima’s children. I’m eternally grateful for learning from the start to focus on emes and moreover, what our emes is.

THE REBBE AND ABBA

The Rebbe nurtured Abba throughout his life, especially in his formative years. There are plenty of stories with the Rebbe and Abba3. I was fortunate to be part of one that has shaped my life.
When I was eight years old, I was on the way to gymnastics one Sunday when I bumped into Abba. He requested that I accompany him to the Rebbe for dollars, his birthday was going to be in two days – Yud Alef Iyar. When Abba would relate the story, he would say that I was reluctant to join him at first, while I do not recall that detail, it is safe to say that Abba’s memory is not to be contended with. What I do recall well was me asking Abba if he would tell the Rebbe it was going to be his birthday. He said no, he did not want to “bother” the Rebbe. I was perplexed and expressed that he will miss out if he does not tell the Rebbe it was his upcoming birthday.

When we went by the Rebbe gave me a dollar, and as I was walking away I was called back. The Rebbe asked me if I light Shabbos candles. I was completely confused by the question. Obviously as a Chabad girl I had been lighting candles since the age of three. I said, “yes”. The Rebbe asked me again, and I again answered, “yes”. The Rebbe then turned to Abba and asked whether I light Shabbos candles, Abba responded “yes”. The Rebbe then proceeded to give me another dollar and told me to give the dollar to tzedakah before lighting Shabbos candles and that I should have א ליכטיגע מזל.

I have a memory of holding up the dollar and showing it to Abba as we exited and saying in jest, “I told you you will miss out, now I got the extra dollar.” As years passed, I recalled that special moment frequently, the Rebbe gave me א ליכטיגע מזל.

Fast forward twenty-eight years, It was springtime, I was defending my PhD dissertation, and Abba was having an MRI scan. I felt powerful having the Rebbe’s brocha of a א ליכטיגע מזל and brought the dollar with me to my defense, which B”H was successful. Abba’s MRI scan unfortunately showed that there was a mass near his pancreas. Abba was terribly shaken by this, of course we all were, but we had steadfast belief that everything would be good. Abba was scheduled for a serious surgery–one of the most invasive surgeries called the “Whipple” surgery, for the following Friday.

The Motzei Shabbos before the surgery our family got together for a melava malka to give Abba chizuk. We all prepared something brief (there are many of us kein yirbu) and meaningful to tell Abba. I came bearing a gift–my ליכטיגע מזל dollar. I concluded my remarks of brochas and well wishes with a comment on the nature of א ליכטיגע מזל; light. When you bestow light to someone else–it expands, it doesn’t detract from the giver but has the power to expand further. I then read the writing on the dollar and the date it was given – Tes Iyar. When I said Tes Iyar some of my siblings gasped, I did not realize that Abba’s surgery was scheduled for Tes Iyar.

This was nearly four years ago. B”H the surgery was successful and Abba healed and lived some of his richest years thereafter. Abba spent much time in Yagdil Torah engaged in deep Torah learning, in the era post the Whipple surgery.

The year following the Whipple procedure, we made a wonderful 70 birthday celebration for Abba, he spoke about ben shivim l’seiva. We are grateful for each day we had with Abba; we know we received a gift of time that this illness is stingy to give. It was mentioned the significance of 72 years as אמלא full, although it is never enough!

Another short anecdote which embodies Abba: during Shiva, we were reminded of the time when Abba requested from the Rebbe to put on Rabbeinu Tam prior to his eighteenth birthday5, the Rebbe wrote to him that it is not necessarily about waiting until eighteen years of age but the main point should be שעבוד הלב והמוח.

How these words ring true of Abba–it permeated everything about him.

Abba’s final words were Moshiach now–may it come right now!

Footnotes:

1 This week’s torah portion is Parshas Mishpotim, where we see this concept arise when a servant would like to remain with his master. The master is required to take the servant to a doorpost and pierce the servant’s ear (21:6), only then may the servant remain with his master forever—only once he changes his topological structure.

2 Back in the day, when I would make a mistake he would correct me with more vigor, for example in perek mem aleph of Tanya I once said, “b’ima”, where Abba powerfully exclaimed “b’eima!”

3 Abba was born in a DP camp in post holocaust Germany. It is remarkable how the Rebbe was attentive to my Bubby and Abba. During the war, Bubby lost most of her family and her two children. After the war she was blessed with two more children. Now Bubby has nearly one hundred frum descendents–largely due to the Rebbe’s guidance.

4 Upon learning the hashgacha protis, I humbly conjecture that when we went by the Rebbe 28 years prior, of course the Rebbe knew Abba’s birthday was approaching. But instead of wishing Abba a shnas hatzlacha right then and there, the Rebbe saw when Abba would need this brocha most and allowed for me to hold onto Abba’s מזל ליכטיגע dollar until that time would come. A role I am forever honored to have been given.

5 My father submitted a letter during the month of Nissan, and his birthday is yud alef Iyar. In the past one was required to ask for permission to start putting on Rabbeinu Tam tefillin, which usually happened around one’s eighteenth birthday. Nowadays, a bochur starts donning tefillin with both Rashi and Rabbeinu Tam.