The Shabbos angels are peeking through my window, Ima is lighting candles and Abba is going to shul… Shabbat Shalom, Shabbat Shalom to every one of you…”
The nursery song instills in us a love of Shabbos – the comfort, the routine, the safety.
But what happens 15, 20 years later if you’re not at home with Ima and Abba, nor are you the Ima or Abba yet of your own home?
What happens in the years in between?
Shabbos, in reality, is a huge, huge deal: it’s 1/7th of our whole life, and a fundamental pillar of Yiddishkeit… So what happens when it’s not 100% in our control?
Well: it’s time we had that conversation.
Rivka Mazal Tauber has been living on her own for 14 years, and the road to making Shabbos “her own” has taken a lot of awareness, work, and showing up.
In this episode of the On your Own Podcast we discuss what it looks like to get what YOU need out of Shabbos – with tips for other singles and students living away from home.
No matter what stage of life, you deserve a relationship with Shabbos that meets your needs, nourishes your soul and brings you closer to Hashem.
For the full episode:
…what it means to ‘meet your needs’? Do you mean to love shabbos? Enjoy shabbos? That’s important. But not sure shabbos is about ‘getting what I need’… Judaism in general isn’t about ‘getting what I need’ it’s about ‘what I’m needed for’. When we make the paradigm shift of chassidus, then life is on a higher, less self-focused plain. And living in line with our G-dly soul will end up making us a whole lot happier. I’m sure living alone as an older single in a community that values and emphasizes the Jewish home can be really painful and difficult,… Read more »
While that might be a lofty goal to eventually achieve, the road to getting there is within the safety of Yiddishkeit and seeing + believing how there is space for us within our relationship.
Shabbos, inherently, has the inyan of Oneg- pleasure- as part of the Mitzvah. Yes, Shabbos SHOULD feel good to us- no matter your stage.
Bittul comes as a choice, not through gaslighting yourself or telling yourself that your needs do not matter.
Yasher Ko’ach for your eloquent retort.
But I will say that Rivka Mazal is a tremendously accomplished, talented Mechaneches at our seminary and *very* other-focused!! She needs to recharge her batteries on Shabbos just as we all do!
What an important topic that is not talked about – owning your connection with G/d but in this context!
Rivka – you are a star!!
This topic stroke a cord with me even as a married person with a family (on the “giving side”!). The term mini crisis is quite accurate
Sometime I also feel like the quality of my shabbos will depend on whether we will “again’ have guests or the lack of guests….
Such an important topic!!!!
I’d be interested in a podcast exploring the “hosting” side!
love Shabbos. Matel Rena Tobin