By Chaya
Ringggg.
“Hello, I’m calling on behalf of the….Tzedakah organization. ”
Phone slams.
“They’re not available.”
“I’m sorry, I can’t at the moment.”
“Would you please just stop calling?”
“I can help you out with $18.”
That’s me on the phone. The one who constantly calls asking you to donate to one cause or the other, do this Peulah or that and explain how important an organization is.
You receive these calls with a touch of annoyance, courtesy or apathy. We callers can let you know it goes way beyond that one phone call. Here are 5 things we wish we can tell you about our conversation.
1. We get to really know you.
Your response tells us a lot about you. We are from the community calling people from the community we know. We know your prominent position. Many of us have dealings with you. We may be your former students, your friend’s child, in your shuir, a customer, know of your child for a shidduch. It is very telling how you answer your phone. We can immediately tell your patience level, function under stress or annoyance and other pivotal traits by your dealings with us. We remember it and it makes a difference in how we view you and respect you. If a teacher preached a concept to us, all it takes is a phone call to tell if they practice it. We can tell the nice people from the nasty and those who are nice to know but you don’t want to anger. Your response to our simple “Hello” is more important than you may think.
2. It’s worth your time to answer the phone.
It happens more times than I can count. A child picks up and we ask, “Is your parent there?”
“Who’s calling?” they reply.
“_________ Tzedakah.”
“(yell) Ma, ____________ is on the phone. Oh, she’s not available now/not home.”
Besides for the obvious minuses of teaching your child to lie and develop a negative attitude toward giving Tzedakah, that wastes your time even more as well as ours. Any call we make that is not answered with a Yes/No response goes in the pile to call again. We will keep calling and calling until we get an answer. It aggravates us as much as you but the organizations usually resort to phone calls out of desperation and they hold hope against hope that you will be their lucky call.
There is no such thing as us taking a hint from always reaching the answering machine or the answer you are not available. It just puts you in the pile to be called again. If you tell us to call back in a half-hour or when your husband is home, we will. It is so much more worth it for you to just answer and simply say no then to keep ignoring. This leads to my next point…
3. There are many ways to say “No.”
This one doesn’t take too much explanation. There’s “no” and there’s “NO.” Would you rather “I’m sorry, I can’t right now,” or “I don’t even care who you are, STOP CALLING ME!”? An angry tirade is completely out of line, especially considering if it is our first time calling and we have no previous dealings.
I highly recommend to anyone trying to find out the mentchlichkeit of a person to call for a Tzedakah organization. We are not money grabbers and actually feel bad calling knowing that most people are not well off. We appreciate an “I’m sorry” and “we would love to but it’s not possible now.” A curt no is very abrupt. Giving a reason softens the blow. We understand if you are over extended or another tzedakah takes priority. It makes us feel like humans when we are talked to civilly. We are not calling to hear your sob-stories about your job or keep you on the phone for hours. It takes the same time to yell or to nicely refuse. Even if you are not able to give financially, at least give mentchlichkeit – for a little mentchlichkeit goes a long way.
5. We’re people too!
That person calling is not out to get you. They are a volunteer or paid minimum or commission wage and do this as a side job. It disheartens us when we are put down and we are encouraged when a contribution is made.
We may be a niece, friend or co-worker. We will deal with you many times in many hats. That person walking in front of you on Kingston may have just called you twenty minutes ago. Treat each person on the phone how you would like your child to be treated.
Thank You.
Thank you to those of you who answer with dignity and patience. Thank you to those of you who, even if they can’t give, add a ‘good luck’ or ‘keep it up’ to their refusal. Thank you to those who reach into their pocket and hearts and give whatever they can. It makes a big difference. Thank you to the people of Crown Heights whose legendary tzedakah, open hearts and willingness to do the Rebbe’s Horaos make these important peulos run.
Next time you get that Tzedakah phone call, remember there’s a human face behind it all.
I know how to give to charity, without being pressured by unwanted telephone solicitation. Please, Please!, do NOT call me. Ever. Don’t even dream of it. I will call you. Period. Clear? Happy that we understand each other. Thank you.,
I am hounded day and night by these people. When they don’t take no for an answer , I turn it around as ask them to make a pledge to my favorite charity and I say I will match what they give. That gets them to hang up fast.
I know a girl who worked in a call center in Bklyn. Everyday she had another charity cause. They were bogus. She knew this for a fact. So when I get a call to donate $………………
There are many families struggling, people are unemployed or working at very low-paying jobs. These are the same people who used to make good salaries and gave lavishly to tzedaka in the past, but now they can barely keep their heads above water. Do you know how humiliated they are when the phone rings and they can’t afford to give the same amounts they did in previous years? To keep calling these people and harass them because in years past they gave such and such an amount, is stupid and cruel. Instead of badgering people who have fallen on hard… Read more »
When I say I can’t right now They say how about 18, 15, 10,5
By the time I am saying no I really cant right now they usually just hang up, rarely is the person polite enough to say goodbye before hanging up. When you’re told no please be polite.
# 82 You make very good points. I knew a very poor person who gave small amounts to many . The problem for many today is that no matter the amount a person has available, there are more requests than most can respond to positively in even the least way. In the present economic times many of us have found that we have more close to us, either family or institutions in our community, who need help.
do not tell hashem how to deal with anybody. who are you? a fundraiser or the samech mem? or is it the same thing?
maybe someone should donate a fund raising seminar to the tzedokos in crown heights, this would give the tzedokos a professional edge, they would learn how to get creative, and earn the dollars they raise, which is so important in a dense community where so many are competing for each tzedoko dollar. this would also minimize the calls, and /or make them more professional. e.g why not learn from businesses marketing who are fighting to stay alive in this economy. use facebook (which is free) and build a nice, welcoming page, get likes and spread your word online, make promotions,… Read more »
Thank you so much for making me aware of this problem. I printed out your article and gave it to my family to read and act on it appropriately. We should all bear in mind: 1) We are not giving out OUR money but we are the gatekeeper to what Hashem gives us. 2) Eventhough we have our own priorites to whom we give ourTzadakah we still should participate even symbolically to every request we are approached with. 3) Always give with a smile or a kind word no matter how much you have or don’t. You can’t imagine how… Read more »
Like I said just my thoughts.
The FTC has ruled that a collection agency (which calls people who owe actual money) is not allowed to threaten the people it calls by saying they will ruin their reputation. What does this sound like?
“We know your prominent position. Many of us have dealings with you. We may be your former students, your friend’s child, in your shuir, a customer, know of your child for a shidduch.”
Yes, it is ILLEGAL for a collection agency to make such a threat, al achas kama vekama some caller who is just soliciting for donations.
Threats, which BTW include threats to call again and again and again, will not make people more receptive to your spiel, THREATS ARE ILLEGAL. Using collection agency harassment techniques against people who do not actually owe you any money ARE ILLEGAL.
How dare you complain that people decide to spend their time reading their favorite blogs on the Internet, or eating dinner or taking a shower or reading a book or even (oh noes!) watching TV instead of taking your stupid phone call. You do not own even one second of another person’s time!
By the way 73 and 74 maybe follow 71’s advice?
To 74 I should have made it more clear. Your right no one has to do anything.the problem is when I keep calling the same person they will say something else. I mean in my opinion at least give an answer after the 2nd or 3rd call.Like the original poster said.its better for you and them.Remember if you say no we won’t call again.( at least for a month or 2)..Think of it that way.And about walking out the door. I could call again in 30 min.maybe they just went out to the store to buy something. Again just my… Read more »
What an entitled, arrogant buffoon you are. Sitting down to dinner is not an “excuse”? Putting children to bed or bathing a baby is not an “excuse” not to talk to you? No one needs an “excuse” to not talk to you! Nobody owes you an explanation of any kind or even the time of day. You remind me of the administrator of the yeshiva that my son dropped out of (to join the army!) who kept calling us for years and years to send in the papers so that they could continue to illegally claim him as a student… Read more »
Not because it’s a bad thing to do, but because the calls are so bad that this is what he/she has to resort to doing! Why can’t we have peace from these people?
Abba – please tell us which organization(s) you represent so I can warn others of your tactics. As the great Bob Grant says, GET OFF MY PHONNNNNNNNNE!
m a y b e your article will open the light to the scams you are perpetrating
ch residents are fooled over and over the worlds masters test us with all new scams
basically a very very small percentage of the money actually gets to the mosad (if any)
I keep my phone ringer off permanently. I listen to my phone messages at the end of the day. My family and friends and some others (doctor, school…etc.) have my private cell number and I know who is calling me. Now my evenings are peaceful and I can spend quality time with my family.
really? we don’t have to pick up our phones?! how are we to be contacted in case of emergencies if our phones are off limits?!
and are you saying that because we spend a few minutes browsing the web after the kids are asleep that we have to put up with obnoxious rudeness at all hours of the day?!
Organizations also need to train their callers in ‘mentchlichkeit’. Some callers don’t take no for an answer. They insist on your giving a day month or year when you will be able to give. It is painful to have to say no when you want to give and there is simply no empathy on the part of some of the callers who just want to reach their goal of getting something out of you regardless of your circumstances. When you say an outright no with an apology, they can be ungracious and hang up on you as though you are… Read more »
Another excuse that I sort of dont like is I’m walking out the door.Sometimes I’ll call 30 min later to see if they really did.
its not right
Wow! After reading the comments on this article I am quite shocked at everyones response! We are talking about tzedaka here! I have been to Israel. I have seen all different people who have been reduced to begging on the streets, because they lost their job and cant afford to feed their family. People who are making the time to call, are calling for a reason. There are alot of people who desperately need financial help. If you feel that you cant give tzedaka and dont want to deal with being polite for a couple minutes, then you do not… Read more »
we receive a constant barrage of calls nightly and all day sunday. caller id usually shows a brooklyn, new jersey, or westchester area code. when we do answer, there is less than a one in five chance that there is someone on the other end. they must speed dial these numbers many at one time. because of this we simply do not answer our home phone anymore. if it is someone we know they’ll leave a message. one time many years ago we received an envelope from a well known organization thanking us for the pledge. knowing that we never… Read more »
When I receive calls and am unable to give I always apologize and say: I’m sorry. I cannot give at this time. If the caller doesn’t interrupt then I add Good Luck / Hatzlocha. I also have a moisad and have made calls, but we never pressure anyone to give. If the caller says they cannot give then we reply thank you for your time and politely hang up. If a pledge is given, we may ask once if there is a specific amount, but if no answer is given we do not press. Say thank you and just send… Read more »
At times, the same woman calls from the organization 4 times a day!! First time I told her to call back when my husband comes home. A few hours later she left a message on my phone and then another one a few minutes later (I was on the cell and couldnt be interrupted…) and then again a half hour later!! It’s harassment. I have given to the org before….but please dont call me so often in one day, and while I’m doing bedtime (aka hmwk, dinner, etc).
i think the writer of this article needs a few things, (besides for a life)
instead of slamming us i think you should make an cheshbon on yourself for being so judgmental about people whom you call from late at night to early in the morning, lying about past contributions and getting angry and calling back when we ignore your call!
There was a Rebbe (or a Rav – depending on which community is telling the story) who said he would rather give to 100 fakers than miss out on giving to one person genuinely in need. Boruch Ha-Shem we don’t have that problem. 100% for sure, they are ALL fakers..
Yeah I noticed that too! But I guess no one else seemed to…
I’d like to thank the author of this article for opening my eyes. In the past whenever I said no to the fellow on the phone, I’d feel bad thinking perhaps they don’t relize how rude and pushy they are being and just doing their best to raise the nessecery funds for the moisad. Now, thanks to this article, I see that they truly believe that they are entitled to their obnoxious behavior, and we are the ones who owe THEM an apology! The nerve we have to spend a couple of minutes with our kids after a whole day… Read more »
You don’t have time for “sob stories” about my job, yet your entire op-ed is one big sob story about your job! That’s pretty hypocritical. Knowing that people like you are so insensitive to the realities of life and that you sit there behind the safety of your phone judging me, I’m going to give less to all the mosdos that call begging …
I contributed once to a new cause (by mail). The receipt
made a mistake in the name. I then began getting many
solicitations with that error in the name. I realized that these
causes are making their money by selling the names of their
contributors to other organizations. They never got another
cent from me..II suppose it didn’t matter to them – they were
making their money by selling names. I felt violated
what do you mean don’t be rude you guys are the ones being rude, calling day and night without reprieve and when i finally pick up i get no response
feed your children. Do homework with them etc. and let the answering machine get the calls. That’s you paid for that suped up phone with an answering machine….
Everyone wants to be treated with respect, however, it is very annoying to get a call during the dinner hour and from my own experience making these calls, I have been advised not to call the same number more than a few times and to go on to the next name. Many of us feel badly that since we were formerly able to give and can no longer due to our own financial struggle, we offer to have the caller mail us an envelope…If we can, we will return it with whatever amount we are able to give. So mutual… Read more »
How about we all pledge to support our own ? I mean across the world. We take care of Chabad mosdos, Satmar looks after Satmar, Yeshivish goes for Yeshivish etc. This way everyone is covered. Don’t forget, charity begins at home. Look after your own families first, help them out with tuition, food bills and rent money. Then give to others.
My myser money is spent before I get my paycheck on helping my children make ends meet. If I have anything left over and you are respectful and courteous I may be able to help you.
This is very true. But you won’t take NO for an answer. You are pushy: “Well you gave us $36″ last year, can we send you an envelope?” Sorry, no can do. “How about $18?” No, I’m sorry, I’m not in a position to help right now. “We’ll take a credit card/pledge/post-dated check/your first born son.” I am sorry, I can’t. “BUT……” That’s when I slam the phone down. How about you telemarketers showing us some respect? I support my children on Shlichus. It literally takes up our spare money because when my daughter calls me & says “Ma, how… Read more »
Your point was well argued but if you call my house at 10pm at night i cam going to slam the phone on you. And I do not have little ones in my home. It is a great mitzvah that people take time out of their busy schedules to make the phone calls but the phone calls should not be made after seven, the latest eight. You would not want someone to call your home phone and wake up your kids right after you put them to bed, the same way you do not want people to be rude to… Read more »
B”H I am lucky to have a job in this economy and I know what it is like to be struggling. I am happy to give, but, on my terms! that doesn’t mean you are entitled to claim my hard earned salary. If you call while I am eating supper I. DO. NOT. PICK. UP. THE. PHONE. If you ring the doorbell and I am already in pajamas I. DO. NOT. OPEN. THE. DOOR. You should visit a car dealership or a high-end jewelry store and see how the sales people treat customers they think might buy a new car… Read more »
I have been a fundraiser for about 10 years at many different places.Let me tell you the job is not easy. But let me tell you there is a nice and respectable way of doing it.i have ppl with a lot of babies crying and they listen to every word I say.Also dinner in my opinion is not a legitamite excuse.Most of the time when I try to get a donation from those people they just say they can’t give.If they say to call later they will either not pick up the phone and make up something else.About calling after… Read more »
I grew up in a house where we welcomed in those that knocked at the door. Some were nice , some really desperate and some off their rockers r”l. A few were big chutzpanyaks. One man walked off with my anash list . I think the point came when a man shoved aggressively a xerox copy of my parents check in their faces and said you gave this amount last year and he wouldnt take anything less. My parents realized that they had to figure out how to handle situations like this that were becoming more frequent. A – my… Read more »
The Federal Communications Commission (FCC) adopted rules that require anyone making a telephone solicitation call to your home to provide his or her name, the name of the person or entity on whose behalf the call is being made, and a telephone number or address at which that person or entity can be contacted. The original rules also prohibit telephone solicitation calls to your home before 8 am or after 9 pm, .
Although these laws do not include non-profits, non-profit organizations should follow these as guidelines or the law should be changed to include non-profits.
We’re retired, on a fixed income and give to a select few charities. I personally have tried to never make pledges by phone – because I might forget. We get hundreds of these calls – from CH,from out of town, from out of state, and out of the country! An envelope is much better. It allows a person to figure out how to allocate their tzdaka.
I don’t remember where it was written but the Rebbe said that a certain percentage (he named the percentage) should be given of the tzedakah collected to go to the person who is collecting.
Let me tell you how infuriated I am to see this piece. The nerve! Telling US not to be rude? I have had tzedoka callers tell me “Last year you gave us 36.00.” Um, no, i didn’t. I have never donated to your mossad, EVER. Calling at ridiculous times, not accepting what I can offer, PLEASE PEOPLE, give me a break!!! One time someone called me and my whole house was bananas, I was being polite to the caller, making supper for my 6 kids, and dealing with one child kindly and politely who had a real issue. Meanwhile the… Read more »
….saying please call back- truth be told I can’t afford to give a donation, I have to buy clothes for my children and pay tuition, and we’ll see if I get to buy the boots I need for this winter. And I’m nursing a small baby, and trying to manage suppertime and bathtime, and doing the dishes, and laundry, and bedtime, and storytime, and paying my bills, and cleaning up, and… well you get the point. And when my child says I am not available, yes I am REALLY not available. So sure, I feel guilty, sorry I offended you,… Read more »
most things that come to mind have already been mentioned so won’t repeat, however one thing that really bothers me lately is the frequent calls when no one is on the other end of the line. I don’t walk around the house with a phone in my pocket, so even with a phone in every room, still means getting up from what I’m doing, and/or walking across the room to answer. If I hold long enough sometimes there is finally a voice and if I mention that it is very annoying to answer the phone to an empty line I’m… Read more »
for all those who have a problem with caller doring super or at late houers. ther is caller id and you can tell who is calling and even if not, thenif you are to busy and stresssd do not pick up. the people calling are not alwase paid but many times a volunteer so respect that. they are kids and have no idea of when to or not to call they are only following instructions…. i to run a moisad and a shliach. i will not say whre but maby my incorect spelling will give it away…. i to have… Read more »
this article simply shows the frustration level of the person making calls. You cannot make judgments about another person’s character or life or way they raise their children based on their response (or lack of response) to your calls. you cannot know how many other calls the person may be getting. you cannot know what is going on in anyone’s life. To even write such an article is insensitive and not the way tzedaka should be collected….
As someone who used to raise plenty of cash over the phone and annoy plenty of people in the process (no regrets btw) I think I can rightfully tell the author to either grow a thicker skin and focus on her growing tally for the night or do something else. No’s – all no’s polite ones, annoyed ones, rude ones are part and parcel of the job and if you feel it getting to you to the point that you can’t work any more, then take a break. If when you come back you still feel it getting to you,… Read more »
even if we can’t give,this is tzedaka for goodness sake.how we answer when someone asks for tzedaka is a nisoyon like everything else only more so because of tzedaka’s connection to moshiach.we are all overwellmed but let’s be honest with ourselves and not make excuses.
So basically you’re saying: give money to every unless organization that calls because otherwise you will ruin any chance you have of getting a Shidduch for your kids. Subtle…..
seeing in all these comments how people really feel about this way of trying to collect money, I think that the organizations should rethink their strategy. as with any other business or charity idea, if you find that the people you wish to approach are so not receptive to what you have to say, then its time to rethink the way you do things. Its time this practice of calling at home stop, and organizations will just have to be more creative in figuring out how to raise the funds, or rely on what is sent in the mail, which… Read more »
If you are an annoying caller, don’t blame people for getting annoyed at you.
And if you’re as judgmental as the author of this article, don’t wonder why people are annoyed at you.
I hate telemarketers, which means that my number is on the DO NOT CALL list. However, non-profits and political organizations are not subject to the DNC restrictions so I still get a bunch of those. I used to say, “I am very sorry, but I am unemployed right now.” However now that I have caller ID I JUST DON’T ANSWER THE PHONE. Nobody owes you the time of day so get lost. How dare you actually THREATEN families for hanging up on your UNSOLICITED phone call, which would be totally illegal if you were not exempt from the DNC list.… Read more »
I have a policy that I do not make pledges over the phone. The reason for my policy is that I do not want to make a pledge and then for some reason, either the envelope was misplaced etc. I do not fulfill a nedava. However, when I tell this to the caller they continue to ask me for a pledge at lesser amounts. They usually end the call abruptly. I feel bad but they should respect my policy. I understand they have a difficult job.but we too deserve some understanding.
I used to give a small donation who everyone who called. Then all those organizations shared my name with 10 more organizations each. From 5pm to 10 pm every, yes every night my phone never stopped ringing. I have a large family, they need me off the phone. I started asking each one nicely to send me an envelope and to take me off the phone calling list forever. No one stopped calling so, i had to have a life. With no guilt at all, I spent a year hanging up on each of you. I have my life back.… Read more »
It is very painful to say no. We live a in mid-sized city with a very small frum population. Another factor to saying no to all is that saying yes seems to get a person on so many lists. It is immpossible to know who is asking Many of the organizations calling are unfamiliar. We give to very few non-local organizations or mosdos but perfer to give locally and to individuals who we know are in need of help. We used to ask for mailings but found it painful to have to ignore so many since we can no longer… Read more »
You may be living in a bubble and are disconnected from reality. Please bear in mind that when you call me, during supper or while I am bathing the baby, you are not the only person calling. Sometimes you are the TENTH caller within the last half hour! My supper or the baby’s bath is getting cold (and baby looks like a prune) so I actually AM very annoyed, frustrated and under the circumstances, have a very short fuse! You are the tenth person calling for a “worthy” cause, and the person I just hung up on was being very… Read more »
This is a very judgmental article! I don’t know who the callers are, but most of them them are extremely pushy and aggressive. I am a Shliach and when I ask people for donations, if they say say not right now, or I’m really tight etc. I know I have to leave them alone for now. If I was to use the aggressive tactics of these callers, I would loose my whole base and could shut down shop. My response to every caller is to please send an envelope and I will do what I can. I think that is… Read more »
I can relate to both the called and caller. i was also trained to say “my mother/father is unavalible right now…” most times they arent. i dont know how so many people know my housse number, but the phone doesnt stop ringing!! we cant always answer… I always hated thouse calls because i hated making up exscuses or the other about why we cant give tzedaka. b”h we have a very large family and my parents have low paying non-consistent jobs. That all changed when i volenteered to make phone calls for a shliach. now i was on the other… Read more »
if I agree to have you send me an envelope on the condition that I am not pledging any amount, don’t put on the front of the envelope and in the letter that this is a “bill” for your commitment when it clearly is not. This definitely will not get my tzedoka. Also if you are from an organization that I never heard of , don’t say “last year you gave $54.00 can you match that this year” Obviously, I did not give last year. Don’ t call or ring my bell late at night
well written article. However, please understand that here in CH, as I guess anywhere else, we get these calls all the time. I got a call at 11:30 at night. When I asked the caller do you know what time it is? He said I was told that in CH people go to sleep very late. And was very obnoxious. Also someone calls when I am on another line and I answer the click expecting a call from my son, you start going into a whole shpiel about the mosod. Your average person here gives tzedoka where they want to… Read more »
im also not into giving these organisations who shave off huge amounts so that the overheads can live lavishly. I would rather give something tangible, seforim for a school, siddurim for a shul. I certainly would never give at the door and it is highly unlikely i would give a “cold caller”. I cant imagine invading someones privacy after 9pm, not even a good friends so why would a stranger (and one calling for a favour) invade mine? i appreciate this is a hard job for someone to do and i try to be polite but i would rather not… Read more »
I am so overloaded with helping others,giving and praying 3X a day for Moshiach that He must think I am rude.
So while they call me anytime they want,like when I am sleeping,eating or in the little boy’s room , so can Moshiach come,while I am most distracted and busy….as is foretold.
D.Benveniste Tsfat
I dont know who u are. I dont need to tell youwhat i can afford Often you people are annoying kids trying to get a buck and share it w your boss. Be happy you dont get punished for this scamming
I had a caller from out of America call me about tuition for poor isreali kids. I told them that I like giving to local tzedakas. She was like well these kids parents can not find money to pay tuition. I told her very nicely that I help local tzedakas and that my tuition for my kids is barely being paid. The woman started yelling at me that I do not know what tzedaka is and I should be ashamed of myself. I then told her that i learned tzedaka begins at home and I support my local community. She… Read more »
Where’s number 4?
Now whoever’s reading this comment will scroll up to see if there’s a number 4, realize there isn’t and smile to themselves
Thank you for making us aware that you now know what kind of person we are. Shall I now right an op-ed to discuss how we choose which organizations to give to? 1) How about the organization who somehow charges my card and “swipes” for $180 in EY – gives a time and place, and I know for a fact that both my husband and I at that exact moment were nowhere near EY or anyplace we could’ve possibly given our card then to be swiped, and we both used our cards later that evening so we know it wasnt… Read more »
poor poor baby people are sooo rude, now let me tell you the other side of it. people calling for tzedaka LIE. first if you agree to give you should give, but if you are late they send you bills like a collection agency. In my house we make it a policy to ask for an envelope NEVER promising any money. then they call you the next year and tell you YOU helped us last year with “$” will you do so again? LIE LIE LIE. one organization called me a few hours after my husband died — so sorry… Read more »
This article really is quite creepy. I mean the girl who wrote it is making sweeping judgements about people she thinks she knows because she got into their kitchen, [or under their skin!] for a brief few seconds. Right in the beginning she claims you may be her teacher, or hold a prominent position in the community. I find it frightful, a shameful lack of respectable borders.
Whilst I agree that Tzedaka must be a part of everyone’s life, within the perimeters that they can afford, is it not possible to leave the judgements to the Ribono Shel Olam?
So you got a job in telemarketing in the classifies. Good for you, last time I looked for a job the only thing available was to sweep the subway platform. You are lucky. Sadly, you were not aware that your job description involved annoying poeple. You never realized that its disrespectful to push those who are too polite to say no. But your boss is smarter than you a hundred fold and led you to beleive that the organization you work for is a “tzedaka” organization. If you think I teach my kids to hang up the phone on a… Read more »
I am selfish! I don’t give anyone anything! So when you call I’l say that I give and really I’m an outright liar. I don’t give to anyone. Unless they wet my gambling attitude and make Chinese auction. Then! I’l give because its fun to gamble. Wake up CH how many calls are you getting? 10 a week? probably not even that! Will $50 a week kill you? Fact!!! I spoke to many CH’s and most of them do NOT keep clear Chesbon and give Maaser. Want to know why CH is one of the poorest Jewish Communities in NY?… Read more »
1) Sales is the most difficult job in the world. Cold Calling is the most uncomfortable job that exists in the world of sales. It is uncomfortable for the caller and uncomfortable for the called. You say you know who they are? I say that you have no idea how it feels to be called. 2) You have some nerve saying that you can judge a person completely based on a 5 second hang up. Complete nonsense. You don’t and can’t get to know a person on 5 seconds. Here is what I know about you! You get frustrated with… Read more »
Last year, Baruch HaShem I was zoche to give 14.7% of my income to tzedakah. Unless I know first hand that at least 60% of my had earned maiser money is going directly to help someone in need, I’m not giving it to you! So when I ask you for your IRS Form 990, (i.e. the annual reporting return that non-profits must file with the IRS and their State Attorney General, that provides information on the filing organization’s mission, programs, and finances) don’t ask me if I want an envelope! I don’t. I want to know how much of every… Read more »
and would pledge over the phone. the phone calls increased in freequency manyfold; I started asking politely to remove my name from calling list and to communicate via mail; the phone calls didn’t stop. Often time someone just calls and hangs up, no answer…
I am so darn tired of the callers who don’t take no for an answer. “Can I send you an envelope? If you can’t pledge 36, how about 20? 18?” When I answer the phone (that today, more often than not, does NOT have a name on the caller ID, I am already suspicious that this is not an honest call.) There are very few people making calls today as a volunteer, and I fear that they make a commission based on how much they bring in. I am overextended and over committed as far as tzedaka is concerned, plus… Read more »
I’m not sure which organizations you call from. But let me relate what happened to me recently. Last year B.H. I was able to afford to give money to a Lubavich organization with an office in borough park. I have given small amounts in the past however in 2010 I gave north of $1000. As always with Tzdaka I told them that I send out my donations once a year after filing taxes, and the only communication I want is my tax receipt in the mail. They asked for my number just for file purposes. I got my first call… Read more »
Firstly , the phone rings the girl on the other side cannot pronounce the mosad’s name properly ! this telemarketing girl is not from our schunah. and possibly not even Jewish . I would not give a dime to telemarketing service who shave off more than 60%, the 10 pm door ringer collectors take 50%, and pay there drivers another 20%., also most of the Kingston ave shnoror ladies are also not Jewish , jypsies , who collects must have a letter from Badatz , they are legid. Keep your money , feed your house pushka or give a friend… Read more »
This is going to get a lot of comments, because we all suffer from this. 1) You seem to be a very nice person, but please realize that you are not the first or the last person to call this evening. The phone doesn’t stop ringing, and not all the callers are as nice as you. 2) If we say no, please don’t pester us, it makes it so much more uncomfortable for both of us. 3) Calling during supper time or bed time, means you are catching us during high stress time. You can’t expect a mother who has… Read more »
For making me more aware!
This really made me think twice about how I treat others on the phone. Have I always been polite? Probably not.
I will definitely be seeing those calls differently from now on.
Thanks for writing this and bringing this important point to our attention.
There’s this misconception that ‘Shluchim have money’ or ‘access to Money’ but the reality is that most of us struggle to keep a working phone line, running power and clothe ourselves and children with dignity.
Getting these calls puts us in an uncomfortable situation, especially as stated above, the callers usually keep pushing and pushing $5 $8…. Even a $5 donation requires a working cc, which is often not the case.
Please be considerate to the other side, don’t push, and yes. Calling at 10.30 pm is innapropriate.
i agree with all the responders:.i’ve experienced each of those examples plus if i say no, i cant right now, but if you send me something in the mail i will try to send as soon as i”m able.very often the caller just hangs up
B”H
Thank you for writing your article.
Thank you to all those who give…
Thank you to every one who will change as a result of having read the words here.
Please take those well written and heartfelt words to your heart and give Tzedakah generously.
It pays to give Tzedakah.
One never becomes poor from giving tzedakah.
One becomes rich through giving Tzedakah.
And the main thing is: through giving Tzedakah you are hastening the Redemption, now!
A Shliach of the Rebbe in Los Angeles
Think of a better ways of getting people to donate money on the phone instead of trying to scare us with. “i know who you are and i wont be nice to you next time i see you.”
Or another way for you to fell is better is to get a different job.
I hear what you are saying. But please understand, I dont know how my name got on your list. but know this … 1) We don’t have a lot of money. We are NOT rich. 2) We can barely pay our bills 3) Still – we have two Tzedkahas we contribute to. 4) You call past normal hours (after 8 or 9 or even 10 sometimes, one local Tzedakah called at 9:45 once .. thats not nice. 5) We have kids, when you call we are often doing dinner, bathtime, homework, or maybe holding a crying baby. We can’t always… Read more »
I agree with your well written article, I would like to add something from a point of view of the one answering the phone. If I say: “I’m sorry, but I can’t help out right now. I would like to wish you Hatzlacha in your other calls…” Do you know what the answer that I get is: “Well, if you can’t do 18, then 10. If you can’t do 10 then 5…” Callers, please understand us when we say: “I can’t help out right now.” And please don’t keep pushing.
Thanks.