Krinsky Family Conclude Shiva

The following is based on an email Shlucha Chana Vigler has sent to her community at Chabad of Palm Beach Gardens, Florida, and adapted with permission for COLlive.com:

Dear Friends,

It has been quite an exhausting and challenging week. My husband Rabbi Dovid Vigler and I flew in to New York from morning to evening one day this week to visit our family who is sitting shiva after the passing of my grandmother, Mrs. Devorah Krinsky OBM.

I can’t express how hard it is to see my father, his sisters and brothers, and of course my grandfather, Rabbi Yehuda Krinsky, sitting on low chairs with a rip in their clothing, then listening to my father recite the kaddish in memory of his mother. There is hardly room to stand let alone sit because of the endless throngs of people coming to pay their respects.

And everyone has a story. They are all quite alike. They are not stories of heroism, of some extraordinary nature. Just of a simple smile and that kind and friendly “hello” that you just don’t forget. But truly, I don’t think too many people really knew my Bubby. She never thought herself to be of anything out of ordinary, never made a tumult and everything was always fine with her.

She was however, a most extraordinary woman, one that my Zeidy was most fortunate to find. It was quite remarkable that it was mere moments after her husband and children finished singing eishes chayil to her that her soul departed, because that is exactly what she was.

A BELATED ENGAGEMENT

From the beginning, even before marriage she demonstrated this special quality. Our family always likes to tell the story of how the day that was due to be their engagement celebration, the Rebbe decided to go visit Camp Gan Israel quite a few hours away.

Sure enough, after bringing the Rebbe back home, Zeidy returned that night, long after the festivities were over, for it all to be repeated the next day. I could still see her face and hear her voice chuckling about this most ‘humorous’ event. I’m not sure how many women would have found this to be humorous.

But Bubby did. And that’s the way she lived her life. Always by her husband’s side and never made any demands. She spent many days and nights alone, by herself, raising her family of 6 children and never knowing when her husband may or may not be home. Whatever my grandfather did for the Rebbe was no doubt because of Bubby, the woman of valor by his side.

To me, what describes Bubby best is how her husband was one of the rare few who had the privilege of having a very close relationship with the Rebbetzin Chaya Mushka Schneerson, the Rebbe’s wife, yet Bubby herself never met her.

Bubby had a clothing store and would select special outfits for the Rebbetzin to try, but Bubby herself never went. She would send my mother who happily volunteered her services. That’s how she was, never focusing any attention unto herself.

VIP VISITS

She was always happy. Especially with her family. To Bubby, her family was everything. There was nothing we could ever do that wasn’t excellent in her eyes. For us there was only love, unconditional love and lots of homemade brownies, rugelach and the endless gifts.

Bubby had a special closet in her house that she would stock with all sorts of gifts she would buy for us. So you didn’t even have to give her any notice, just ring the bell, walk in with 5 little kids under the age of 5 and Zeidy and Bubby would light up as if the most important people in the world just walked in, because we were.

We were the most important people in the world at that moment. Bubby would immediately pull out some homemade chocolate chip cookies she just baked with a brand new twist she just read about in the paper then open her magical closet and hand out dolls, cars and coloring books she handpicked just for this occasion.

And of course whenever she came to us, she never came empty handed.

One of the visitors that came the other day noted how unusual it is how my Bubby is so loved. It doesn’t matter if it’s a child by blood or a child by marriage, or a grandchild by blood or a grandchild by marriage. To my grandparents, there is no difference. Once you joined the family we were all blood.

SIMCHA FOLLOWS LOSS

Zeidy and Bubby were always and still are a huge part of our lives. They never missed a Simcha. And they are extremely involved in our work here in Palm Beach Gardens, Florida. After each event, we know we have to call them as they anxiously await our call to let them know how it was and constantly call to get updates and details of what is happening here.

It was hard for me to leave my grandparents house the other day, as I was leaving my aunt said to me “Bubby is proud of you and of everything that you are doing”, I know she’s right. Bubby was always proud of me even when i just sat and ate a bag of popcorn.

Then again I thought, it was easy for Bubby to be proud of me from far, maybe over the telephone it sounded better than it really was. Now, Bubby is really watching. I hope she only sees good things and I also hope she cuts me some slack.

As the Shiva is over, there will be the celebrations welcoming a brand new baby boy, the son of my brother and Bubby’s newest great-grandchild. Shabbos morning will be his bris. And thus continuing Bubby’s shining legacy.