Is the System Failing Our Children?

MyLife: Chassidus Applied Episode 68

“My son dropped out of yeshiva. He felt all anyone cared about was whether he was on time, had his shirt tucked in, and whether he went to mikvah. No one asked how he was doing, no one encouraged him – just badgered him and made him feel bad about himself. He felt completely misunderstood at best, and abused at worst. We tried a few other places and my son decided he had enough of Lubavitch yeshivas. What would The Rebbe say – do all these boys HAVE to be in the exact same model yeshiva?”

“What are we doing about our children’s yeshiva system? Why aren’t the schools stimulating and challenging my children? What would the Rebbe say about out education methods when so many boys and girls are losing their way? I When I see my boys have less yiras shomayim than when I sent them off to yeshiva, I question everything. My son recently said, that he wouldn’t be surprised if many boys will leave zal after their whole life being in Lubavitch and have no feeling to keep their yarmulkas and tzitzis on. I feel like crying for our children who don’t see a Rebbe, feel the beauty of Yiddishkeit in their bones or have the knowledge to internalize what they learned for 20 years. This is a crisis!”

“Do you have any advice on handling my children’s sense of entitlement? Of course we want to assist them, but it seems that married children today have an expectation of being wined and dined and given money, all while barely offering a “thank you”. This is very different than when I was brought up where we had little, expected nothing, and honored our parents for just being there.”

Other topics to be addressed in this week’s episode include: Continuing the discussion about working on a challenging marriage and how to overcome feelings of resentment towards a spouse.

In addition, Rabbi Jacobson will review the following essays submitted in the MyLife: Chassidus Applied contest: “ומה לקבל לשנות מה, Emotional Reactions: To Keep or to Change?” by Noam Shapira, “מצוי, Rising above Despair” by Yoel Friedman, and “My Anxiety and Chassidus” by Yossef Malkin. These essays and others can be read online at http://meaningfullife.org/mylife/contest/.

This hour-long dose of insights is meant to inform, inspire and empower us by applying the teachings of Chassidus to help us face practical and emotional challenges and difficulties in our personal lives and relationships. To have your question addressed, please submit it at www.meaningfullife.com/mylifelive.
The topics in this Sunday’s hour-long broadcast will include:

· Chassidus Applied to Bamidbar and Shavuos
· Why are children the only acceptable Torah guarantors?
· Is the yeshiva system failing our children?
· Ungrateful adult children
· Negative feelings about one’s spouse (continued)
· MyLife Essays: Emotional reactions; Chassidus and anxiety; rising above despair

MyLife: Chassidus Applied addresses questions that many people are afraid to ask and others are afraid to answer. When asked about the sensitive topics he has been addressing, Rabbi Simon Jacobson commented, “I understand that the stakes are high, but the silence and lack of clarity on matters plaguing the community can no longer go unaddressed. The stakes of not providing answers are even higher.”

The on-going series has provoked a significant reaction from the community, with thousands of people viewing each live broadcast and hundreds of questions pouring in. At the root of every question and personal challenge tackled by the series is the overarching question: Does Judaism have the answers to my personal dilemmas?

In inimitable “Jacobson-fashion”, the broadcast answers people’s questions in simple, clear language while being heavily sourced. Each episode is jam-packed with eye-opening advice from the Rebbeim, gleaned from uncovering surprising gems in their letters, sichos, and maamorim that address our personal issues with disarming relevance. Simultaneously, Rabbi Jacobson is able to crystallize a concept quickly, succinctly, and poignantly for any level of listener.

All episodes are immediately available for viewing in the MLC’s archive and can be downloaded as MP3’s for listening on the go.

Questions may be submitted anonymously at www.meaningfullife.com/mylifelive.

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