By Levi for COLlive.com
19 years ago to this day I was with my friends at Shain’s shul in Crown Heights where we were learning at the after school Yeshivas Erev. Somehow word got through to us that the Rebbe had fallen. Shaken yet undaunted, we split the Tehillim, each taking another part to say and went home.
The day was Chof Zayin Adar I 5752 and I was 10 years old.
The next 2 years would be very painful for me and everyone I knew. We spent lots of time wandering in 770, waiting for the next time we would see the Rebbe.
Life then was in overdrive; everything was about the Rebbe and the hope for the immediate coming of Moshiach. Rallies, learning, daily Tehillim, davenings in 770, “Moshiach Beepers” (I sometimes hear the signature beep in my sleep).
All the camp songs were about our yearning to see the Rebbe again and healthy and leading us out of golus. I still remember Mulleh Chanin as the funny farmer in that year’s Color War play (adapted into film as “The Faithful Shepherd”).
I don’t remember much else, although I clearly remember the love I had, even as a 10 year-old, to the Rebbe. When the song “Rebbe, oy Rebbe” would play, I would burst out in tears.
Today is Chof Zayin Adar I 5771, and I am 29 years old.
After work, I will Beezras Hashem be taking time to reflect on this day with my wife and children and try to explain to the little ones what it was like to be with the Rebbe in our midst and what will be when Moshiach comes.
Thinking back on those days I understand why we today have trouble thinking or talking about Moshiach like then. It’s because we were there, we had so much bitachon and so much energy. It’s so hard to foster that same energy and belief, that we might have just given up.
Rebbe, oy Rebbe, we need you!
Thank you for sharing this article! We need more like these!! Number 11 – AWESOME!!
Tears are flowing down my cheeks how much I miss the Rebbe. I am 37 yrs old and i feel every moment grateful to all the Rebbe gave us the rebbe formed us to how we think a]nd what we do every moment of the day. all day long every step i take i think to myself…what would the rebbe want me to do or say in that situation. We are glued to the videos of the Rebbe and are able to learn everyday through the sichos, farbregans and conversations thanks to JEM. I look forward to the day that… Read more »
wow i was exactly the same age and the same sentiments. Thank you for expressing it so beautifully, although it is painful…moshiach now!
I am much older as I am now over 50 and i still can clearly remember those days and tears come down from my eyes. We all knew that the Rebbe will come out of his room and continue to be with us. May we see this NOW.
I too remember standing outside by shain shul, and when we found out I reecall going to 770 and there were minyanin of tehillim starting, and we were just waiting around for information, but yes those days were… Unexplainable, excitement for what was about to happen any minute,, but sad b/c we didn’t have our Rebbe as we knew him previously,,, and everyone had a different opinion of what the Rebbe meant,,,,,,,,,oy if we only had that now
On the one hand I must agree with the writer and post 8, but there is something extremely powerful about the age we were. Politics meant nothing to us. We loved the Rebbe with all our heart and soul. I remeber vividly after 3 tammuz in Mesivta. Each and every one of us loved and missed the Rebbe genuinely. I remember farbrengens where we would sing those camp songs from the summer right after 3 tamuz. I would cry with true tears of love – exactly like a child mourns a parent. We lived together, we missed the Rebbe together,… Read more »
the Rebbe waved to a guest from Eretz Yisroel who came for a wedding the next day in Montreal. The family was standing there getting nickles from the Rebbe and the Rebbe got into the car to drive to the ohel and the family got into a car to drive to the airport. We heard the news in the car and at the chasunah the chosson said that “a chosson, b’tor melech is gozer that the Rebbe be gezunt”
Beautifully written. Thank You. Moshiach Now
Wow, powerful words! I am your age and have long felt that our age has it especially hard. On one hand we were children old enough to remember but our memory is a haze. We don’t have the experiences of those 5 years+ and older
The kids who never saw a thing, well of course it’s a nebach but at least they haven’t a clue what they are missing.
these are the thoughts that children and newcomers to the shchuna need to hear. For those who were too young or not here, you can’t imagine the energy and the life.How I miss it. The simonim are all here. Moshiach is definitely around the bend. As the song goes: Oh Rebbe oh Rebbe we miss you…….
you really brought me back to those intense years, its healthy once and a while to leave this baalei batishe life style and remember the good old days
wow my principal said the same story to us but in girl from.. thanks for posting this – i cannot imagine what it was like!
i was standing next to the bochur who wrote for Bais Chayainu he asked what was the time it was 1:24 PM when the Rebbe entered the car. after the Rebbe waved and entered the car as the car was pulling out the Rebbe waved one more time.
Thank you to the author for giving us a chance to hear this on this very day! Thank you COLlive for posting this and givng us a feel of the Rebbe on ur Chabad site.
May we be reunited with Moshiach now!
Very Powerful!!
Moshiach Now! AMEN!
thanks so much for your uplifting words. this is the kind of article i like going to the COL inbox!