The room was filled with eager listeners. Eager, because the topic on the table was one of great importance to them. Some had traveled over two hours to be there.
The listeners were teachers, principals, mashpiim, and maggidei shiurim at Chabad yeshivos and mesivtos, the topic was the mental and emotional health of the bochurim entrusted in their care.
They had all gathered for the first Teachers’ Mental Health Seminar, organized by Neshamos.org.
The full day seminar covered a wide array of topics and placed an emphasis on the role a teacher can play in a bochur’s mental and emotional development.
First up was Dr. Eli Rosen of Crown Heights, who welcomed all the teachers and introduced them to the work of Neshamos.
He was followed by Dr. Dovid Shwartz, Psy.D. In his warm and patient style, Dr. Shwartz spoke of the proven, vital role that a nonprofessional plays in the psychological development of every individual.
Dr. Akiva Perlman, PhD, Professor of Addiction Studies at Long Island University and clinical director at Amudim, discussed confronting vices and addictions amongst yeshiva bochurim, and how to tell the difference between innocent exploration and behavior which should cause concern. He also spoke about the psychopathology behind these various behaviors.
A lunch break (catered by Menachem Sheinberger of Holesome Bagels) allowed the gathered to engage in discussions regarding the specific issues they were facing at their respective yeshivos, and the different approaches and mindsets they had adopted in responding to them.
After lunch, Rabbi Dovid Losh (mashpia at the Lubavitcher Mesivta in Monsey, NY,) took the stage. He shared a personal account of the double life many bochurim are living in yeshivos. He recounted how he had been a regular, “good” bochur in yeshiva who participated and did well all through the entire system, and yet through it all felt a deep loneliness and sense that no one really cared about what was going on with him. He also spoke of the true satisfaction a teacher can feel when they are truly helpful in a bochur’s development.
To close the seminar, Rabbi Levi Rosen, LCSW, talked about typical mental and emotional health issues among bochurimthat he has witnessed while working in local yeshivos, and stressed the importance of a teacher having a supportive team when dealing with these matters. He finished up with an open Q&A.
The seminar was designed as an opener for novices and a refresher for the more advanced. Many a seed for new initiatives were planted at the seminar, one of which was an online biweekly conference for yeshiva staff on pertinent topics of mental health.
Neshamos.org would like to thank all of the presenters and organizers, and most importantly the yeshiva staff, who care deeply about this community.
Video: Rabbi Dovid Losh at Teachers Mental Health Training Seminar
Video: Dr. Akiva Perlman at the Teachers Mental Health Training Seminar
If only the yeshiva system would realize that each student is unique and one size doesn’t fit all, we would have many more happy and truly chassidish bochurim/girls. People resent being told exactly what to do and dress and learn, “because it’s chassidish”. It isn’t!! They just don’t have s better answer. I remember when my boys were young and their principal told me the button down shirts starting in Pre-1a is a more chassidish look. Ridiculous! A light blue polo would be so much easier for the mothers and isn’t one bit less chassidish. Same goes for hoodies in… Read more »
Izzy Kalman has a website and gives talks, sometimes in Crown Heights, about how a child can learn communication skills to handle bullying on their own, not needing the help of teachers to make the bullying stop. Learning the skills is easy and fun and works so quickly, often within a couple of days. The child learns emotional strength and social confidence. It’s a shame it’s taking a long time for this approach to be well-known and thought of as a first resort. Which parent wouldn’t do anything to help their child in the realm of emotional health? Mr. Kalman… Read more »
This Topic must be in the open and made aware IN ALL SCHOOL. Including Girls AND in all cities and countries!!
Nice to see the New Haven hanholoh represented so strongly:
Rabbis Lustig, Bornstien, Willhelm, Kessler, Roth, Bistritsky and Einstein, all from one yeshiva.
I know and have experienced their love and caring for each and every bochur at his level.
Kol Hakavod.
Introduce such a program in Elementary schools. A lot of our children are dealing with all kinds of issues, from abuse, illness in the home, death/divorce, bullying, academic failure, loneliness etc. Address it early!
we need more things like this
and even better
we need Moshiach NOW
A pioneer in breaking a stereotype of what Chabad men can do. Kudos, Rabbi Rosen for your hard work and continued success in helping our community.
I can personally vouch that it’s a great program and It has really helped a lot of girls but like always… “Who” is the mentor is really the key to a success story… we have here thank God in LA some really talented and phenomenal mentors…
It’s about some time. I wish this was done sooner instead of seeing therapists. This is very important, and I hope there will be some major change in our system.
Any phone contact for someone from neshomos organization
This is a huge issue. I know it’s controversial to say the Rebbe isn’t here to physically intercede, but in my own experience I have been after our schools to start a program for the children have mental health issues, and I feel like it’s not heard as much as it should be. Someone has to write to the top of Chabad and make it heard. We know if the Rebbe were alive today he would be making a point to the schools to help these children. The Rebbe can surely influence from his current place, but it’s kind of… Read more »
Self development workshops? Maybe backtrack a bit and give the boys the basic education to feel confident and that they have choices in life?
Dovid Losh farshteyt an inyan!
Thank you Meir New for putting it together.
They arrange that every single student is paired up with an adult mentor who takes the sudent out during the school day, on a one to one basis, monthly. Each student feels cared for and listened to. They know they have a soundboard with whom to share their ups and downs of normal teenage life, successes and struggles The mentor stays with them throughout the high school years and many continue the relationship way after high school… way into their marriage
Highly recommended for every high school !!
I remember when they were against a school psychologist, because they said Chassidus will cure everything.
it looks like a very small crowd is this still an issue that people don’t take seriously?
Can you please…..please for manys sake. more then 2 min of video.. its vital. many ashamed to come forward as myself need major inspieration here. it will help more then anyone will ever know… please post full session or link to it…
thanks a bunch 😉
I just want to point out that my experience in yeshiva was basically in the kav of avoidas eved, kav hasmoil and I struggled greatly with it and was basically incredibly depressed, even though I appeared like a very excellent bochur and followed all the rules. As I got older I learned more chassidus and realized that there is another kav, the kav of avoidas ben. BH I work with many bochurim and yungeleit and find that most bochurim who struggle in yeshiva are struggling because they spend years in yeshiva where avoidas eved is shoved down their throats, even… Read more »
Dr. Shais Taub would’ve been a welcome addition to this most distinguished panel of experts.
This is good news.
What surprises me is that the Rebbe addressed the topic so many years ago and on numerous occasions, yet awareness, recognition of the topic, and action has only just begun in our community.
But better late than never.
Thank you very much. Kol hakavod for writing what is really going on. There was an event in Oholei torah last year about drug abuse. You can see and smell on the porch by weddings ppl smoking more than cigarettes. These hit and run seminars or events are only for the people in charge the day we did something. This will not bring a change or help a student. The student will always be found wrong and be punished.
This is not the torah way of education.
FTR, the girls’ schools needs the same attention. Girls are nastier than boys and many of them really get hurt and feel they don’t matter, especially when nobody seems to notice anything about them. Perhaps the mechanchot can also have such a program.
?
Kudos to Neshamos Org for this important work they are doing for the community.
I hope that such an event will take place for the principals and teachers of the girls’ schools as well before the start of the new school year.
What you all should be discusding and stooping and defending are the victims of bullying in your day schools and yezhivas. Yoy have special needs children who are bullied and talked down to..even cyberbullied but yet it is ignored. Why is it not addressed properly? This is mental health…this is what can turn a happy person to dispair and suicide. Your yeshivas have nasty cruel minds who blind you because their families are somthing in lubuvitch. Ehy do you praise the bullies and tell the victims to shut up? Why is that good mental health practice. I think not. You… Read more »
Beautiful and thank you. The bocherim will definitely benefit from this.
Any plans to bring this into the girls schools? Obviously they face different issues.
And any plans to train teachers outside crown heights?
Hope they do this for the girls schools as well greatly needed
Take note, these are licensed professionals, not professional “expert” speakers with no clinical training.
Thank you for bringing this to our Yeshivos and thank you to our Yeshivos for taking such good care of our bochrim.
Wonderful to see, keep it up!
There is a huge dysfunction in our yeshiva systems, our yeshivas are not nurturing or appreciating the well being and mental and emotional health of our buchrim. There needs to be workshops for Teachers and buchrim where they can find their true self and start living from a place of well being and from a place of empowerment. a lot of damage has been done to our buchrim during childhood and during yeshiva and the buchrim need a safe environment where they can explore these painful experiences and have the space to feel their feelings and become the real true… Read more »
The most important area in yeshiva is the Well being and Mental and emotional health of the bochurim.
The entire cookie fitting messed up yeshiva system we have needs to end and we need the start having healthy teachers in order to nurture and make healthy buchrim for once and for all. Its about time.
Is there a full video of this seminar. It seems to be a beautiful and extremely important seminar. I would love to see longer videos of it.
Thank you!
THERE MUST BE MANY MANY MORE SEMINARS LIKE THIS TO CHANGE OUR DYSFUNCTIONAL YESHIVA SYSTEM.
I think it is a very important topic.