By Toby Lieder for COLlive
When my mother passed away, I said ‘How can this be?’
Where has Time taken us?
One day she’s with us, and the next Time she is gone.
The Time we spent together was more precious than anything money can buy.
You cannot buy Time.
Nor can you catch it in a bag and save it!
When we are young, Time seems to take forever,
The older we get, Time just grasps us in its claws.
Where has Time gone?
How can you run away so fast, when we need you the most?
When I was younger with a handful of kids to raise,
Time seemed to move so ever slowly!
I kept saying to the ever so slow ticking clock, “Move already!”
I want to see these gorgeous little kiddies getting older already,
waiting impatiently for their progress in life.
I couldn’t imagine walking them to the Chupah, in a million years!
I clearly remember the earlier years, when I’d stare at the clock, taking it’s Time, till the house of sweet, bathed, clean kids, were finally asleep by 7:00 PM.
Then I could have Time all for myself, to catch a deep breath, go to the restroom alone, sip a cup of tea and read alone with my then best friend, Time.
Sipping my tea, for the brief Time I had, all to myself, I would reflect on my day. My mind would then drift off and dream into the future, wondering curiously, what the future years might look like.
“Can it be?” I would chuckle, and ask myself, “Could it really be?
One day these little kids will be grown up adults, and I would be the ‘Bubby’, for their kids?”
What has Time in mind for me, I would wonder.
Time took away my mother.
Time took away my father.
Now, on reflection, Time snapped away my youth.
I am no longer the carefree young kid playing ball, or pick up sticks, with no worries other than with whom to play!
Time stole my youth but gave me maturity in return.
Time took away my parents but gave me perspective and appreciation in its place.
Time allowed my babies to grow, leaving me with photo collages to display on my kitchen wall, to remember their adorable faces!
Time, you were my friend, when I needed you to go more quicker, when in labor.
Time, you took, but you also gave.
I have one question for you, Time.
Why so fast?
What’s the rush?
Why can’t you slow down just a little bit, like the Time we were 6, waiting for our 7th birthday party!
You, Time, have a lot to answer for.
When things are super challenging and all wrong, in life, like illness or challenging kids who are testing our nerves and patience,
you seem to take all the Time in the world to help us resolve it!
Why can’t Time heal us quickly?
Why do you work so slowly, when we need you most?
You are so powerful; you regulate the world
Everybody wants a piece of you!
Yet, Time, you are our biggest blessing at the same Time.
If we learned anything at all from Time, it would be, patience.
With Time, I learned to have faith in Hashem.
With Time, I learned to have trust.
With Time, came experience.
The knowledge and wisdom to choose right from wrong.
Though you stole my parents, my carefree youth, and my young looks, I am grateful to you, Time, for the gift of patience, which finally delivered me the goods, the nachas I have today, after marrying off my 13th child, and having over 30 gorgeous grandchildren and growing, Boruch Hashem!
Time may rob you, and feel like the enemy, but, hold on tight, because in return for what Time takes, it actually returns, to deliver the goods, wrapped in tons of Nachas, at the end! Hold on! Just a little bit longer…
Toby Lieder, mom of 14 kids and over 30 grandchildren is an educator and world reknown lecturer and Shadchan Coach inspiring her audiences with her humor, inspiration, and deep insights together with 42 years of experience in raising her family who are all nearly married now.
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