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Thursday, 17 Sivan, 5779
  |  June 20, 2019

    Frum Abuse Survivor Speaks Out

    Abuse survivor Sima Yarmush told a crowd of 350 in Los Angeles about her abuse as a young teen and the backlash her parents faced from the community. Full Story, Photos

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    Abusers are CHARMING and FRIENDLY!
    Guest
    Abusers are CHARMING and FRIENDLY!

    “The negative reactions from the rabbis that I approached and from the people in my community was, if you can believe this, more painful than the abuse itself.” Abusers are usually charming, and friendly, and well-liked, and can be pillars of the community, and in positions of authority, or the guy-next-door, wouldn’t-hurt-a-fly…. “He has children!” “He would never do such a thing!” “He’s our friend!” Everyone rushes to their defense because they just *know* that the man (or woman) would *never* do such a horrible thing… and WE CONTINUE TO ABUSE THE VICTIMS with our silence and coldness and protection… Read more »

    Sima
    Guest
    Sima

    You are a brave and beautiful woman. You have courage and strength that fills me with inspiration and hope for a better future. I am are rooting for you every step on the way. Thank you JCW for protecting us! G-d bless

    Hearty YK, to you!
    Guest
    Hearty YK, to you!

    Sad you had to endure such abuse, proud you are giving a voice to those who haven’t spoken out yet!

    Very Powerful Evening - thank you JCW
    Guest
    Very Powerful Evening - thank you JCW

    Sima was incredible. What a brave young woman! When you listen to her full speech you realize that our rabbonim need to do more and do better. Furthermore, it’s okay to make mistakes – own them and apologize and we’ll all be a lot better off. Side note, there are a few inaccuracies in this article. The abuse did not go on for 3 years (she said 2 years and a bit) and more importantly it’s not accurate to say that “Their solution was to move him to a nearby city where he continued to serve as a Jewish community… Read more »

    Brave girl!!!
    Guest
    Brave girl!!!

    Beautiful girl, thank you for being so brave!

    Agree spot on with #1
    Guest
    Agree spot on with #1

    I was married to a man who is extremely charming. I never believed that he could be responsible for any abuse. In fact, he was always “looking out” for the wayward teenager who needed extra attention. These are exactly the perpetrators who you need to look out for the most. Be very suspicious of any adult taking such interest in your children.

    Thank you Sima!
    Guest
    Thank you Sima!

    Sima you are strong, courageous, and an inspiration!

    Question
    Guest
    Question

    Heart breaking and totally mishandled by the Rabbis

    However the loudest applause that she got was when speaking against the Rabbis
    Anyone find something not good about that?

    Wall of Shame?
    Guest
    Wall of Shame?

    Simple question to the mothers out there of teenage or older sons. After all the arguments,if YOUR son,YOUR little tattala ,would be the perp ,would you still feel so strongly about not taking the perp into consideration and only worry about the victim ?Would you want YOUR neshomala ,who Nebach is struggling with a problem to be on the Wall of Shame?

    So brave!
    Guest
    So brave!

    I am in awe of this young woman! This must be a whirlwind few days for you but when things quite down you will have made the world a better place and be in a healthier place yourself.

    Inspiration
    Guest
    Inspiration

    Good for you, the shame belongs to your abuser, not you. You are a amazing beautiful woman and you deserve to be happy and not carry around this trauma.

    Thank You Sima
    Guest
    Thank You Sima

    Thank you Sima for having the courage for sharing your story. Thank you for the awareness of the damage that pedophiles do to our young children. Thank you Eli Nash for bringing to our attention that abuse is robbing and emotionally killing our children. Please keep educating everyone about this important topic, I can say for myself that before I went to the JCW event in LA, I did not totally understand the gravity of the situation. I would highly recommend that if you have a chance to attend an event with a victim speaking of their experience, please do,… Read more »

    To 8
    Guest
    To 8

    Since most of the comments are positive, I don’t wanna drag this conversation down but it is very understandable that this is what got the loudest applause. people are sick and tired of how our Rabbis have handled abuse. You heard it yourself, the way they treated her was more painful to her than the abuse!

    Very sad for all involved
    Guest
    Very sad for all involved

    So heartrending

    Amazing Woman
    Guest
    Amazing Woman

    She is a true hero and amazingly courageous. Hopefully this will warrant some change.

    Truth will prevail!!!
    Guest
    Truth will prevail!!!

    When one speaks the emes it enters the other persons heart.
    Im humbled by simas courage, and steadfastness to truth!
    May you be blessed with only good things in your life!

    Please name the molester Rabbi
    Guest
    Please name the molester Rabbi

    If the ‘Beit Din’ Rabbis were named, the molester should be named also.

    @9
    Guest
    @9

    Yes, even if it was my son, I would. My pain and the pain of my son and my family is not the problem of the victim!

    Number 9 - emotional argument
    Guest
    Number 9 - emotional argument

    You offer no argument against a wall of shame. Of course no one would want their child to be on the wall of shame. But Torah says lo Samod al dam reacha. If someone is a danger to the public the public needs to know about him. It is the communities responsibility and obligation to let people know.

    you are amazing
    Guest
    you are amazing

    we are listening. we are supporting. even if you don’t know us and we don’t know you.

    Empowering
    Guest
    Empowering

    Sometimes the “leaders” of the community aren’t the ones in black hats and jackets; they’re giants like Meyer Seewald!

    To #9
    Guest
    To #9

    #9, are you kidding me?! If you knew anything about this perpetrator or even listened to the entire video, you would know that her molester was no bocher…he was married with children! Yes, WALL OF SHAME! He should be sitting in jail right now if he weren’t so protected when the rabbis found out. Your compassion is misdirected.

    Abuser?
    Guest
    Abuser?

    She does not mention the abusers name, who is it?

    He did get therapy.....
    Guest
    He did get therapy.....

    Abuser received therapy I.e. the Rabbonim handled the situation. Situation was not ignored. Why does it need to get publicized if he got the help he needed?

    whaaaatttttt?
    Guest
    whaaaatttttt?

    whats going on?

    who was the abuser?

    Incredible!!

    Noble Mission!
    Guest
    Noble Mission!

    What a noble mission! What a pity that JCW feels that their noble mission gives them the license to cause collateral damage when not needed!

    Sima, You are a heroine!
    Guest
    Sima, You are a heroine!

    Sima, you are truly a heroine. You have been the voice for many. Yes, you have done your part in protecting our children, in changing the culture of secrecy and empowering others to speak out. I humbly say thank you.

    to Sima
    Guest
    to Sima

    Your strength and courage is so powerful.
    You mite never know how many people you have help by doing so, u should go from strength to strength .
    KOL HAKAVOD!!!
    And a huge shout out to JCW
    AWARENESS IS KEY !!!

    To #9.
    Guest
    To #9.

    You’re a fool of biblical proportions. You abuse a child, the wall of shame should be the least of your worries. I personally don’t like the death penalty, but when it comes to people who abuse another, or even worse a child, i sincerely hope you don’t only get the death penalty, I hope you’ll be tortured beyond recognition. (Obviously not you I’m saying hypothetically.)
    And of this downright AMAZING woman, I am in such awe. Truly the definiton of a warrior.
    JCW, THANK YOU!!!!

    To #9
    Guest
    To #9

    If your “little tayere’l” had murdered someone in cold blood, would you refer to that as “he nebach is struggling with a problem”? CSA is no better.

    Please educate yourself on this topic. Your comment is staggering.

    to num 9
    Guest
    to num 9

    Ur comment is soooo disturbing on oh so many levels!!

    Very powerful speech
    Guest
    Very powerful speech

    Genuine and powerful!
    So sad you and your family had to endure this!
    We all knew your father. If u r anything like him you are alright!

    to 8 and 12
    Guest
    to 8 and 12

    Watch. The speech.
    the reason why the applause is so loud for the rabbi was because she said that was the most painful part of her experience.

    #9 wall of shame
    Guest
    #9 wall of shame

    Are you all there??What if your tatella abused someone within your own family?So where would your allegience be?No one is proud to see a face on the wall of shame.Who would?It is there to protect a community and if you did some research the nebech perp continues because his compulsion and desires have taken over.How many get “cured”?So it’s ok to keep abusing because the wall of shame is more important than the lives of the innocents?Is that what you are saying?Yes it is tragic for the family of the perp and they suffer pain too.we all know that.The perp… Read more »

    I commend you
    Guest
    I commend you

    Wow. The first women to come forward and really tell her story. I admire you greatly. I can only image how hard it was.

    abt #9
    Guest
    abt #9

    if i read correcty, #9 was asking a question to others- not saying HER/HIS OWN opinion- so everyone please calm down 🙂

    survivor
    Guest
    survivor

    Sima, you’re story is almost word for word my story. Different city, different guy. Same story. Except for the whole “my parents supported me” stuff.

    to 24
    Guest
    to 24

    Please give us some sort of proof that he got therapy and is safe!!
    It would be important to know if we could still ask Shalos to those Rabbi’s
    To Sima: I wish you only healing, health, and happiness forever!
    A strong supporter of JCW

    To number 9
    Guest
    To number 9

    Read Eli Nash op-ed. He did a phenomenal job addressing this exact point

    To #23
    Guest
    To #23

    Go to jcw website, it’s there (last name starts w an “L”

    Sima
    Guest
    Sima

    sima, when I watched telling your horrid story, which I had to force myself to watch- it was so painful. You looked to be the exact description of a Bas melech, so modest and beautiful even telling tbis gruesome tale.

    Brave woman.
    Guest
    Brave woman.

    So proud of Sima! She’s a beautiful, poised, frum, & normal woman with a devastating past. But she’s using it to help others- kol hakavod to her.
    The molester’s inititials are SBL, he’s the latest addition to theirwall of shame. What a sick man.

    to # 37
    Guest
    to # 37

    Please reach out to JCW to help you, they will.

    To numbers 24 and 37
    Guest
    To numbers 24 and 37

    24: listen to the speech! It didn’t help! He continued! It’s a sickness! He should be in solitary confinement in a mental institution!
    37: I truly feel bad for you, I cannot imagine your pain! I hope Hashem gives you the power to recover and come out stronger!

    sima thank you!
    Guest
    sima thank you!

    Sima thank you for coming forward and brining this matter to the forefront of peoples mind and attention. Abusers and Rabbis who cover up abuse must know those days are over! People like you who come forward break the ground for others to do so as well, and show abusers and rabbis who cover abuse that their actions will be no longer be hidden, everyone will know about their evil and sick ways!

    Thank you!
    Guest
    Thank you!

    Thank you col for reporting on this story. Thank you Sima for being so brave and to your family for supporting you. Thank you Rabbi Tauber for always bein such an advocate and thank you to JCW for leading the cause. – Zvi D in Dallas

    Look at the website
    Guest
    Look at the website

    Go on JCW’s website. So many Lubavitchers… I’m embarrassed … And I’m not even related to them (BH) !
    What would the Rebbe say? Does someone know if the rebbe ever spoke about this? I would love to hear.

    Sima
    Guest
    Sima

    Wow may Hashem give you the strength to keep bein g so strong

    to 37
    Guest
    to 37

    #37
    Please, go to JCW ,you can save other peoples life, and this will help you to get strong and successfull in your life, and to transform the tragedy that you experienced into a springboard for a wonderful life full of joy!

    to # 37
    Guest
    to # 37

    my heart goes out to you. to do this without family support is the worst crime of all. I hope you feel Hashem with you and I hope you have at least one decent person supporting you. Sima you are an absolute hero. BH you were absolutely blessed to have the parents and family you have. My family not only doesn’t support me but judges me, shames me, blames me, it’s the worst of all atrocities. I have seen and felt first hand what you describe of our Rabanim and mashpiim. I wish I could speak up like you, I… Read more »

    Sima G-D Bless You
    Guest
    Sima G-D Bless You

    #24
    You are part of the problem by trying yo dilute what took place probably many time over with many other victims.
    I will personally pursue this case with the goal of publicizing the accusers name.
    Shame on you , stop playing with others people/community live. This is serious business and it will be dealt as so.

    SIMA!!!!
    Guest
    SIMA!!!!

    Woooow Sima!!!
    Your so amazing and brave!
    May Hashem shower you and your family with tremendous brachas!

    You are wonderful
    Guest
    You are wonderful

    Watch the stories unfold. You have paved the way for some may to come forward, and for families that have been sweeping these stories under the rug to now come forward. May the healing to are allowing others to have increase your own healing.

    It's time for justice!!
    Guest
    It's time for justice!!

    These rabbis should be ashamed of themselves how did they condone such terrible actions of this rabbi!! It’s time to publicize not only the molesters but also the rabbis the condoned them and support them they are guilty just like the molesters!!

    Whoa,put down your pitchforks.
    Guest
    Whoa,put down your pitchforks.

    So far we have heard only one part of one side of the story.

    Rabbonim ARE doing their job!
    Guest
    Rabbonim ARE doing their job!

    Indeed very sad. However, seems that some facts have been slightly distorted. The Rabbonim involved actually did send him away and it was to a community to deal with old people only.

    To 47
    Guest
    To 47

    Ugh is that true?!? I really hope lubavitch era aren’t the majority!!

    Hashem should continue to give you strength and courage ....
    Guest
    Hashem should continue to give you strength and courage ....

    Sima Yarmush and other victims deserve our complete support, not condemnation. You are a credit to the Jewish people, your bravery and honesty are a light to others. We are proud of you. You have nothing to be ashamed of. You are a true Bas Yisroel!

    You're amazing Sima!
    Guest
    You're amazing Sima!

    Sima, I have no words to tell you how beautiful, courageous you are and how in awe of you I feel for you. Wow what a true shlucha and soldier for all women and especially frum women! May Hashem bless you to only become stronger and atronger and with all the happiness in the world, as a mother, wife, friend and woman and in all that you do!

    jcw isn't good enough
    Guest
    jcw isn't good enough

    There are too many perpetrators and molesters who aren’t on that wall of shame thanks to their families money and influence

    wow!
    Guest
    wow!

    spoken with such dignity and grace! you are a hero!!!

    From a caring counselor and teacher
    Guest
    From a caring counselor and teacher

    Thank you Sima and JCW for reaching out to others and by standing up you are no longer a victim but a survivor! When a child or woman has the guts to speak out as it is so embarrassing to share in the first place please listen and show chessed. Do not ignore a person baring their Nashama. Also almost 99.9999% of women do not have it in their chemistry to physicially abuse children as statistics show females who have been abused, must learn not to marry abusive men who will abuse them once again and too their children as… Read more »

    Missing something?
    Guest
    Missing something?

    Just trying to figure out why they didn’t go to the police? Especially if they felt the rabbonim were not handling this the way they felt was correct. If they were truly concerned about the possibility of more abuse that’s what should have been done.

    A True Heroine
    Guest
    A True Heroine

    You will be the one who brings Moshiach!!

    shaken
    Guest
    shaken

    no words to describe how shaken I am.
    I have (finally) come to realize the extent of this problem.
    kol hakavod to you Sima

    to #34
    Guest
    to #34

    Yes the wall of shame protects our community, however who decides who goes on. In other words there were numerous accounts of people being put up there for no reason whatsoever and this ruining their lives. There has to be a better way to solve this issue and make sure only guilty people go up there.

    Bravo!!!
    Guest
    Bravo!!!

    Sima I give you so much credit to stand up and tell your story, that takes a lot of courage and guts, I’m sure you will help many others by that. Good luck to you in the future , may it be filled with happiness and blessings!

    I dont know you
    Guest
    I dont know you

    But your story is so touching. Im a shlucha just a bit older than you. Im so sorry you experienced such pain. Hashem should help you continue to heal and continue to find the incredible courage you displayed in your speach. Im awed by your bravery. Thank you for helping us protect our communities.

    to 55
    Guest
    to 55

    halachically,a girl older than 12 1/2 years is an adult I think that is unfair to talk like this about the Rabbis ,they only look at this matter al pi halacha 5th volume of Shulchan Aruch is common sense, and Of course, this a case of someone that goes after teenage girls, and he is a danger to the community,obviously ,is a chillul Hashem Rabbis sent him to therapy and then sent him to a community with old people This was 9 years ago, now things changed , and I can tell you that the same Rabbis ,today ,they would… Read more »

    To Meyer
    Guest
    To Meyer

    This was no easy task to take on but as a parent raising children today, I owe you a huge thank you, you cleaned up shop!!!! Keep up the good work and thank you to all those that help you!!!

    Maiden name
    Guest
    Maiden name

    What is sima׳s maiden name?

    to #66
    Guest
    to #66

    Look on JCW’s website for their process.
    They really do their research before putting a child molesters name up.

    Freed from Shame
    Guest
    Freed from Shame

    Time for our communities to awaken to drug abuse and alcoholism amongst the tribe. The first step to recovery is coming out of the shadows of shame! Let the predators know shame !! Keeping secrets is killing us and don’t we, the Jews, have enough enemies? Yasher Koach to a true heroine! The prison is the secret. If we light candles, we must also light with truth!

    to 66
    Guest
    to 66

    Recently a Rabbi was charged with pedophile abuse, it was in the news in collive and all over ,but his name is not in the wall of shame
    please ,Tell which people are in the wall of of shame for NO REASON” and how do you know that there is NO REASON

    who is responsible?
    Guest
    who is responsible?

    How could Sima’s parents allow a 14 year old girl be alone with a man? If we follow the logic presented in Sima’s lecture, then her parents share at least as much responsibility as the rabbis who were consulted years after the abuse took place. The parents would have to considered accomplices to her abuse.

    To 56
    Guest
    To 56

    I know plenty young people in that community who had NO idea. He was around plenty of them!
    I am sickened!

    so frustrating to hear
    Guest
    so frustrating to hear

    Yes, abusers not only can be charming, charismatic, holding high positions, they usually are!!!
    This is why it is so hard to understand why people won’t believe a story of domestic or other terrible abuse based on those characteristics. Those are actually the qualities that ensure that no one will believe the victims.
    Wake up.

    Enough
    Guest
    Enough

    The molester’s website is Jewish hospitality – congregation bais avrohom. He briefly moved to Palm Springs but now lives in north Hollywood. He should takeh do what he threatened her with. What a rotten neshomo. Corrupting pure Jewish children. Sima- thank you for displaying such bravery and courage and telling your story. There are so many of us rooting for you! Oh, and his website does have “adult” written all over it. If it weren’t tragic, it would almost be comical. Adult Shabbat services. Adult meals. Right. Wolf in sheep’s clothing.

    Every mother
    Guest
    Every mother

    Should watch Sima’s speech! you are my hero! I only pray that this will help wake up mothers to educate themselves and talk to their children!

    disturbed
    Guest
    disturbed

    Since these perpetrators are truly sick people, the danger is always lurking. The best way to go about it is to educate the children how to protect themselves and tell their parents when someone makes them uncomfortable. Parents must be vigilant and educate themselves. Schools must be vigilant too. I feel terribly sorry for the victims. Bashing Rabbonim is NOT the solution. I was very turned off by that and after that only listened with half an ear. I know that a lot is being done in the area of child safety and bullying and to the best of my… Read more »

    Good
    Guest
    Good

    Sima,

    You inspire us all. #STOPTHEABUSERS

    Chavie
    Guest
    Chavie

    Wow Sima. I got chills as I listened to your story. It makes child abuse that much more real. May Hashem give you the strength to heal and move on and keep standing up for what is right. I hope the people in your community give you and your parents a big apology for not believing you and abandoning you when you were weakest. Hatzlacha!

    to #63
    Guest
    to #63

    Watch the speech, she answers your question.

    Leah
    Guest
    Leah

    Sima kol hakavod!! I think you coming forward gave jcw more legitimacy. Your story was raw and difficult to listen to. I watched it with someone who is quick to dismiss these types of accusations and bh I am glad to say you made a dent in that way of thinking. Ali vehatzlichi!

    hey
    Guest
    hey

    Who said that the rabbonim ddnt handle this properly?? Do we know for sure that he continued to molest? Dont forget that as horrible and painful as it was for sima We r still missing many facts! Sima is promoting jcw so we r not going to get the ful pic!! One cannot bash a talmid chochom like this for not reacting the way YOU would like esp when there wass no experience in this field. Dont get me wrong. I give sima bravo for speaking up but i must say there may be missing or other facts explaining why… Read more »

    To 66
    Guest
    To 66

    How do you know there are numerous people up there who are not guilty. There is no way of you knowing that, is there?

    Sima-May Hashem continue to give you strength to speak up!
    Guest
    Sima-May Hashem continue to give you strength to speak up!

    Thank you for this eye opening talk. Unfortunately, as more and more stories are revealed across countries, schools, colleges, and yeshivas, we see that CSA is not just in the frum community. In fact, there is no community untouched by this criminal offense—from Hollywood, to the Universities, to Catholic dioces, and G-d forbid to our Yeshivas! However, in those places not claiming to be following and living lives dedicated to Hashem, we can maybe –just maybe – not expect them to stop the abuse. But G-d forbid and G-d help all of us –if our rabbanim whose sole purpose is… Read more »

    Dear Sima,
    Guest
    Dear Sima,

    You’re incredible! Such courage. Hahsem should bless you for the lives you’re saving .May Hashem bentsh your holy bubbie, whose home and family I had the privilege of spending much time in/with, with many more langer,zeese yoren.
    Esther Weiner

    Wow!
    Guest
    Wow!

    I’m in awe of your strength! I am humbled. What a powerful message. May there be revealed justice. And may you continue to have the strength as a wonderful wife and mother in this mission to ensure it never happens again! May you experience revealed brochos in this journey as you work to protect others! And may you experience only love and support from here on.

    name
    Guest
    name

    What’s simas maiden name

    My turn to speak out
    Guest
    My turn to speak out

    I was abused as a kid. A lot of ppl were 30 years ago. Back then one didn’t speak out. Rabbonim didn’t do anything. Parents told us to “move on” and we didn’t have a voice . We suffered in silence . We did not go to the police . And I’m glad. I’m glad that my family didn’t have to suffer the consequences of me talking out as there will always be those who didn’t quite agree with that way of dealing it and my family were spared of that. Im glad rabbonim didn’t get involved because I have… Read more »

    he got therapy...
    Guest
    he got therapy...

    Is he an abuser TODAY??
    or are we just using him as a korbon for the general issue?

    good to nip it in the bud
    Guest
    good to nip it in the bud

    Preventing this crime is a big mitzvah!

    The abuser is from Santa Monica
    Guest
    The abuser is from Santa Monica

    Im not quite sure why no one is mentioning her abuser. isnt that one of the first steps we need to take to protect our children?

    not understood
    Guest
    not understood

    Unless we know for sure that the abuser continued to abuse.it seems like the rabbonim did handle it properly. No one confirmed that the abuser continued.
    Why did the abuser have to be publicized in his original community if he moved?were they not safe him being miles away and maybe even through therapy
    Sad sad story for sima and wow what courage but acc.to the story i dont see mishandling bec she leaves out imp facts

    Wow
    Guest
    Wow

    Sima I am so amazed by your poise and strength and courage. May you go mechayil el choyil. And now I would like to say a few words to the extended family of the abuser. I understand your pain and shame. I understand your desire to hide and run away from the truth. I understand that you are not directly responsible for the abuse and that in a sense, you are victims too. But please understand that by covering over, by denying, by protecting the abuser to save his and your family’s reputation, you do become responsible and you do… Read more »

    to #9
    Guest
    to #9

    If you can’t do the time don’t do the crime. Adults have to deal with the consequences of their actions and family members have to deal with the reality of who their child, husband, father, brother etc really is.

    thanks for sharing
    Guest
    thanks for sharing

    Sima, you are one brave woman! Ty for getting up and sharing your story with the world, it couldn’t have been easy!

    confuse about the parents
    Guest
    confuse about the parents

    If the parents were already speaking out against him to the community to the point that they might lose their shlichus, then why not report him to the police? They too knowingly allowed and enabled this perpetrator to move from city to city. Sima you are beyond brave and none of this is your fault. But I’m just confused as to the parents role in this. We blame the other rabbonim, as they deserve to be blamed, but why not blame these shluchim as well? The other thing that struck me as odd, was the grooming aspect she mentioned regarding… Read more »

    all the facts?
    Guest
    all the facts?

    Everyone running to judge the rabbis without hearing any facts besides what JCW wants you to hear. There are many false statements in Simas speech. The rabbis “allowed” her to go to the police. She chose not to and a panel of rabbanim decided on a path for the abuser. She is lying when she said they didn’t do anything. The guy had nothing to do with youth after that. (Again Sima twisted the story to make it sound like he did ) Did the therapy he had to, followed the program the rabbis laid out for him. … and… Read more »

    Challenge
    Guest
    Challenge

    To number 55: you quote:
    Whoa,put down your pitchforks.so lets hear the other side of the story
    I challenge this so called Rabbi to tell his side of the story to the public. I am sure JCW can arrange it !!!!!!!

    An inspiration!
    Guest
    An inspiration!

    As difficult as this was you have the courage to prevent this in any way you can!
    Amazing role model! You were brought up by such supportive & loving parents!

    Rabbi bashing
    Guest
    Rabbi bashing

    rabbi Shusterman is not just some respected rabbi, he is known to be the most down to earth American rov in Chabad who is aware of way more going on than you’ll ever dream! He is the man that needs to decide on abortion issues or married women expecting a possible mamzer. He lives in a city that had an abuser in their school and that guy was dealt with properly and the children were provided with professional help. This board of rabbis is made up of members of different communities. It is hard to believe they all completely mishandled… Read more »

    never
    Guest
    never

    no blood on our hands, no blood on our community’s hands, we never make mistakes, only perpetrator’s make mistakes.

    touched to the core, no pun intended
    Guest
    touched to the core, no pun intended

    Sima Yarmush You deserve ” Women Of the Century award ” ! I listened/watched you and then relistened while my girls watched you. I think I could Listen a third time! You are a true Ashes Chayil of the highest caliber! If my listening helps your healing, I’m an honored to listen. Pain is inevitable, suffering is a choice, is a hard pill to swollow, hopefully your PAIN AND SUFFERING will really be a thing of the past, for you and so many others. Keep up your connection with your higher power! As you correctly said, nobody else can help… Read more »

    #56
    Guest
    #56

    They should have sent him packing to JAIL!

    Rabbonim need to stand up
    Guest
    Rabbonim need to stand up

    The Rabbis need to stand up for the victims of child abuse by starting to speak publicly on the gravity of child abuse. The Rosh Yeshivos that had past child abuse in their Moseos, should come out publicly and apologize to the victims…… That would be a start to get the public to get the confidence that the Rabbonim are taking the issue of child abuse seriously.

    chazak to you sima! chazak to your husband for allowing you to speak up
    Guest
    chazak to you sima! chazak to your husband for allowing you to speak up

    Not because you are a shliach, you are holy. In order to be holy you got to work on yourself, to daven, to learn, to keep yourself inspired, to attend farbrengen, to watch videos of the rebbe. Sick this shliach, who might be a great person and a success but sick how he used a holy shlichus to fulfill his personal desire. My heart goes for his wife and children, that she has no fault and no knowledge for his husbands behaviour….. my heart goes for sima and her family. I do tremendously respect rabbi shusterman and im so surprised… Read more »

    Disgrace
    Guest
    Disgrace

    I won’t judge sima or CSA survivors, however this cause is getting more and more against yiddishkeit. CSA is a crime and should be reported to the police. And let them handle it. Rabbonim are trained to be compassionate community leaders. They shouldn’t be faulted if they were clueless as how to be effective police. If the LAPD handled if in that manner, then it would be horrible. Go to police and not Rabbonim and you won’t be let down. This speech was a lynch job on Rabbonim in general and one in particular. She shamed a rov who happens… Read more »

    the whole thing in a sum
    Guest
    the whole thing in a sum

    rabbi bashing

    Mentioning names of Rabonim unnecessary!
    Guest
    Mentioning names of Rabonim unnecessary!

    Sima, I admire your courage and your message is so crucial. I feel your hurt and may you go from strength to strength with Hashem’s help!
    I listened to your speech and I was disturbed by the fact that you mentioned the names of the rabanim and you especially bad mouthed the Chabad Rabbi in public. You could have made your point without mentioning names and by refraining from speaking lashon hora bfaehesya which is such a grave sin.

    cudos to 69
    Guest
    cudos to 69

    Sima, its painful I have sadly been in your situation! I agree to number 69! This story was 9 1/2 years ago…. NO one knew how to deal with such a situation..not a therapist and not rabbonim Not legally not halachikly etc . This has changed in the past few years and I am sure the rabbis would have dealt with it differently in all aspects!!! Sima its painful but you had absolutely no RIGHT to openly disrespect embarras put down a rabbi who kept ur story confidential.. And who did not know how to deal with the situation properly… Read more »

    Sima: bravo! Sima's husband: Bravo twice
    Guest
    Sima: bravo! Sima's husband: Bravo twice

    Sima, you are so brave, Thank you on behalf of all of us, the thousands of lubavitchers around the world.
    Sima’s husband, I dont know you and I dont know your family. But without any doubt Sima wouldn’t be able to share her story and share her story IN PUBLIC, without your support. We have to thank you as well.

    To #72
    Guest
    To #72

    I hate to brake it to you but i am personally aware of poeple who were put on the website even though they didn’t molest anyone…….

    Wow
    Guest
    Wow

    Sima you are truly amazing and you are a frum mother doing all her best. Thanks for helping OUR future.

    ARE WE TRULY BRINGING MOSHIACH ????
    Guest
    ARE WE TRULY BRINGING MOSHIACH ????

    After last week’s tragedy to AM YISROEL ,
    Is this the way we move on ??
    Loshon Harah ? Publicly ?????
    Killing eachother ??? Calling an abuser a
    rotten neshomo ? Bashing Rabbonim?
    My heart goes out for what was done…..
    We must protect our children ….
    But there’s a way to do things .
    Please stop all negative bashing
    comments here or anywhere.

    Let’s bring Moshiach……..& think before you
    speak ! Are you ???

    I am ashamed
    Guest
    I am ashamed

    I am ashamed that there is a wall of shame.
    I am ashamed when Rabbonim are put to shame- and in public.
    I am ashamed to be part of a community that feels it’s okay to shame ANY yid in PUBLIC.
    Look at the multiple tragedies that have hit the Jewish world and the world of Lubavitch too in the last few months.
    Is THIS the solution?
    I am ashamed.

    Questions to consider...
    Guest
    Questions to consider...

    Your story is very sad, painful and important to share. You are brave for sharing it in in public so that others are more aware of the dangers and will be more vigilant with their children’s safety. However, I have a few questions to the readers and commenters that I believe need answers. 1) I dont buy the reasons you stated for the parents not going to the police. As soon as they realized that the Rabbonim were not handling it, it became the parents obligation to report it to the police. If they didn’t, dont blame the Rabbi’s, blame… Read more »

    Someone who's been around
    Guest
    Someone who's been around

    To # 69 Some rabbis are worth nothing today corruption too much ego and so on and no knowledge when it comes to any type of abuse whether it’s marriage this type of abuse any type of abuse psychiatrist psychologist go to school for years to study how to help these type of situations what exactly they understand that’s even if they care to understand.the problem is they don’t even care to make an effort to help

    To. 91
    Guest
    To. 91

    I am not judge your decision
    You did the same as 1000s of innocent children did to preserve their families their shidduch and so on
    Some people are affected very badly for ever after such a experience many ppl leave Iddishkait or have emotional and Orr mental problems after being abused or ruin their life’s
    There is another way to look at ,and is that by the silence this abuser continue doing the same thing to other children
    Sometimes someone will be glad if they save other children from being abused . Save other people’s lifes and their generations

    Some points
    Guest
    Some points

    I think these attacks against the Rabbis aren’t fully honest and fair. There is no question that they made terrible mistakes. There’s no question people suffered terribly. There’s no question that so many of us (hopefully all of us) felt a anger at them. All that said and done I want to point out a few things 1) There was tremendous ignorance back then 2) Rabbi Shusterman has helped so many people. My wife is telling me how nice he his on the phone to her, answering all her questions and being very nice. 3) Do we say “shame on… Read more »

    Channel your Efforts Smartly
    Guest
    Channel your Efforts Smartly

    A crowd of people listen to a first-hand account of a holocaust survivor describing the atrocities he suffered at the hands of the Nazis. There are two types of reactions: 1. “I hope that whole country (Germany) goes up in flames”. “Someone should just nuke that whole place, and let the Germans all burn in gehinnom”. 2. “Let’s make sure this never happens again”. The former approach is filled with anger and hate and gets us no where; the latter can actually accomplish something. Investing our efforts in witchhunting perpetrators is futile in my opinion. The masses are thrilled by… Read more »

    to#117
    Guest
    to#117

    I’m ashamed because you think everything should be hidden. Darkness dislikes the light.

    Context
    Guest
    Context

    I wrote about context. I want to clarify that I’m not saying anything. I personally believe very strongly in JCW, Thank you, thank you, thank you for protecting children and my children. Thank you so so so much. I believe in your cause. I was only pointing out that there’s context to things. I’m not saying what should or shouldn’t happen to Rabbis, if they deserve this or not, etc. Just that there’s also context. You do the crime, you pay the time. That’s how it goes in life. Just like the molester even if he or she were horribly… Read more »

    A scene from 200 years ago
    Guest
    A scene from 200 years ago

    I think this is what it looked like when haskala came to power.
    A bunch of people with no beards not Shomer Torah they way they where taught filling rooms with innocent people looking for more standing up and bashing the system.

    Please tell me how this is any different.
    And btw they also had bits of truth to them or they would not have been successful.

    to #112
    Guest
    to #112

    This was not the first molestation story dealt with in our city. We had already had a big wake up call due to the molestation in Cheder Menachem,about 15 years ago. If Rabanim don’t know how to PROPERLY deal with molestation,then DON’T SIT ON A MOLESTATION PANEL!

    117
    Guest
    117

    You would be ashamed if you cv ,would be an abuser or a family member of the abuser
    You prefer the abuser to continue freely ruining people’s life’s for generations ( you only care about you not being ashamed)

    100a must read
    Guest
    100a must read

    Everyone should read number 100.
    You put things in perspective!!!!

    disgusting defending  those who shouldn't  be
    Guest
    disgusting defending those who shouldn't be

    All of you claiming the rabbis didn’t know better it was nine years ago. Little did you know they knew enough to remove a rabbi who molested boys IN MY BROTHERS’ SCHOOL! not only that, only five years before this story happened, they knew what to do when i had a family member being acused of abuse. They went straight to the police without asking. Shame on you, all of you for defending them. They tore my family apart but for this creep they swept it under a rug because he was a top shliachs son. Oh and the molesting… Read more »

    right right right right
    Guest
    right right right right

    Number116 and117. You are both so right!

    RAV bashing is not OK!!!!
    Guest
    RAV bashing is not OK!!!!

    I am so sorry that this story happened! We need to protect our children and each other through awareness of predators. However, at the same time we need to teach our children and ourselves how to have respect. Rabbi Schusterman is THE most Yoshor, straightforward, no nonsense – Rav out there. I know for an undying FACT that he would NEVER!!!!! have hushed this story or instructed not to go to the authorities. The family was ashamed to go to the police to protect the victims name for potential shidduchim. The family was certainly instructed to report this to the… Read more »

    SHAME FOR MENTIONING NAMES OF RABONIM!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    Guest
    SHAME FOR MENTIONING NAMES OF RABONIM!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    A terrible story!!!!!!!!!!!!! But, SHAME FOR MENTIONING NAMES OF RABONIM!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    Just creating more damage unnessacerily!!!!!!!!

    you are ashamed?
    Guest
    you are ashamed?

    Come out of your misguided closet.Maybe the tragedies have more to do with the abuse of people and those who cover it up so get off your high horse.You want everything hushed up so no one will know the truth.Those days are over.No one is infallible unless you believe in another religion.Go back into your cave and hide.

    91 who moved on
    Guest
    91 who moved on

    You have very serious denial problems.Yes you may have moved forward which is good for you but somehow you have never dealt with the abuse.It is quite obvious from how you minimize the event as your parents did.People are more worried about what others will think than the state of their children.That’s just as tragic as the event in my opinion.I know a few people who “moved on”but somehow in the back of the mind,it stays dormant and surfaces in ways people don’t even realize.Yes, people react differently and many variables affect the outcome.However to just move on is a… Read more »

    To #125
    Guest
    To #125

    I do not see a haskala’nik. I see a refined, tznius’dike and eidel woman bravely sharing an experience that should not have happened. A situation that went completely against Yiddishkeit, against tznius, against all the values that we are taught to uphold and protect. She is the one standing up to cry out AGAINST the haskala’niks of our generation, who prefer to protect institutions instead of protecting our innocent children.

    saddened
    Guest
    saddened

    I am deeply saddened that Sima felt the need to bad mouth Rabbi Shusterman. He is one of the few respected rabbonim we have left in Lubavitch. I do not for a second believe that he covered up any part of the story. Perhaps SIma in her youth and anger misunderstood his intentions when he said not to say the name! it was for her benefit, incase the rabbonim would be swayed in their opinion after knowu=ing that the perpetrator was on of their own. Is hse also angry at her own parenst for not forcing her to go to… Read more »

    To 125
    Guest
    To 125

    Haskala movement was against existence of Hashem The Jewish system in the times of the time of the Gemoro was very different as was 20 years ago The same applies today. we have cell phones we have computers. Communication is different. We can tape. Make videos of people doing things that cannot deny later. We can publish a YouTube where millions of people can now instantly what’s going on Today we don’t cover up anymore It used to be that the better way to go is covering up because very little could be accomplished bannig abusers from prominent families Today… Read more »

    Thinker
    Guest
    Thinker

    As much I definetely do not want to belittle what happened to her , I feel a bit upset about how she talks about the Rabbonim who handled her case. She has to realize that there are halachos involved of how and when to reveal. What could have been done was a symposium to make parents aware of what they should be telling their children about letting others touch them in places that are covered. Also, besides for halacha, if the Rabbanim accuse this man of abuse with no concrete proof they could have been easily sued for defamation of… Read more »

    Rabbi Bashing
    Guest
    Rabbi Bashing

    I am touched that she had the bravery to speak up but it seems to be with a very large vendetta and agenda against one particular prominent Rabbi. What was the point of all the Rabbi bashing? I feel like JCW would be a lot more respected organization if they dropped that agenda

    To 117
    Guest
    To 117

    And I am ashamed that you don’t understand that rabbonim are fallible. I know, I got my simcha in 770, but I was never trained in how to deal with abuse. And so when I became aware of abuse in my community, I relied on trained experts to investigate, and the perpetrators is currently in jail. That was my achrayus as a community leader, and a mandated reporter. If you have health issues you see a doctor, not your rov. If you have a flood you call a plumber, not your rov. If you have a breakin you call the… Read more »

    JCW
    Guest
    JCW

    The fact that the Jewish community finally has an organization that deals with child s abuse if fantastic. The fact that half their agenda is to take down the Rabbis is not. It forces people to take a side against an organization that is very needed

    PHD and agree with # 126
    Guest
    PHD and agree with # 126

    TOTALLY DISAGREE with # 112 and pretty sure either a) she is not a victim because she would never say that b) a – so called – Rabbi writing it c) someone writing under Rabbinical supervision

    Sima: as a Behavioral Therapist and Rabbi myself I want to commend you beyond words for “coming out” AND yes; we need to know whom they are – if not we help them go on with their criminal behaviors!!!!

    To all of you saying that naming a rov is wrong ...
    Guest
    To all of you saying that naming a rov is wrong ...

    If a rov makes a mistake, a mistake that must be learned from and never repeated, then publicity is a chiyuv. If bad advice, even if well intentioned, had been made public decades ago, things would be much better now. Secrecy is dangerous, publicity and transparency are now needed, as embarrassing as that may be.

    Victim
    Guest
    Victim

    Sima I commend your actions! This is not the time to start “educating” the victim of what she should/shouldn’t have done. As I’m sure she’s reading every single one of these posts. As a community – her family-we are supposed to support her, education should have happened BEFORE she got abused. Now although it’s ten years later. And Bh after therapy. One never forgets! As far as the Rabbi bashing is concerned, I can personally account for myself, I cannot and will not ever forgive the menahel of the mesivta for allowing my abuse to take place under his very… Read more »

    Defending the undefendable
    Guest
    Defending the undefendable

    So it’s tuning in to defend a Rabbi. The issue is not only how the handlred the so called hearing and their response to it – but HOW THEY (MIS)HANDLED THE PARENTS AND FAMILY – HOW THE DID NOT EVER FOLLOW UP ON THE WALFARE OF THE VICTIM – TO THIS DAY – in the words of Sima. You don’t have to be a Rabbi to know – that your concerens were more in protecting the perp than the victim – And for that there is NEVER an excuse.

    I AGREE WITH #100
    Guest
    I AGREE WITH #100

    WELL SAID

    Missing something!
    Guest
    Missing something!

    I’m not understanding what all these comments are about. If you know of a danger report it to the police. If you have a question about your macaroni and cheese that you mixed with a fleishige fork, and you don’t want to call Rabbi shusterman for FREE halachic advice, I’m sure he’ll know what to do with those extra 3 minutes of his time! Very sad story indeed. I know for a fact that now Rabbi YS tells people to go to the authorities which also will confirm that there is more to this story than what is said at… Read more »

    to #91
    Guest
    to #91

    how irresponsible of you, by going to the police you could have spared others your fate

    Courageous young Girl!!!!
    Guest
    Courageous young Girl!!!!

    Very courageous young woman. I understand why she named the Rabbonim and not the abuser that night. In that moment (when speaking to the Rabbonim) she began to break her silence to the outside world other than her family. Her parents may have felt here is our guidance and here is my child’s story. To stop her silence when she had built up her courage to name her abusers as she was describing those secret moments that were silent at age 14 because she was in fear and coerced was unbelievable. These were Adults, community leaders, fathers, and she was… Read more »

    Sending Someone To Therapy from The Community
    Guest
    Sending Someone To Therapy from The Community

    Someone ordered to therapy from the community is a scary thought. The four rabbis assigned to hear this case sent the molester to therapy. Therapy in the orthodox world usually means going to some untrained or hardly trained rabbi (think Nechemya Weberman). What a valuable person to see as a therapist! Nothing surprises me anymore!

    Parents of an Abused son
    Guest
    Parents of an Abused son

    We are the parents of an abused son who unfortunately mishandled the situation unlike the parents of this brave young woman. When we found out about the abuse our son had undergone we thought if we dealt with our sons issues and ignored the abuser and did not confront him the situation would be resolved and go away. We took our son to counseling and figured, ok problem solved Little did we know by not confronting the abuser and having him own up to what he did to our young and innocent child it was like telling him ” its… Read more »

    since everything is so public nowadays
    Guest
    since everything is so public nowadays

    how come there is not enough advertisemnts and guidance for those abusers? we can be far more protected if these guys can go get help before it is too late! Many abusers want to get out of their rut but need help!!!!! They are horrified and suffering .
    I am not sticking up for them – I just know how much they can be suffering!

    To #114
    Guest
    To #114

    That’s what you think.
    Why don’t you speak to their victims

    #143
    Guest
    #143

    Unfortunately, the same rabbi’s including others not specifically mentioned but directly involved in this case have repeated their same stance as recently as this year. This is not logic of 10 years ago it is current and continuing. Thank you to JCW for helping the rabbi’s see that their cover up positions might not be as tenable as they think. – Current

    My opinion
    Guest
    My opinion

    I think that part of the problem is that abusees want to be the victim and for people to ffel bad for them etc.

    We should see everything through the lens of chassidus and torah.
    People need to grow up and move on somehow and learn that getting back at the abuser is not the right way to deal with these things.

    To 155
    Guest
    To 155

    Wrong. This isn’t about getting back at abusers, it’s about protecting future victims. Statistically, the vast majority of abusers repeat the abuse and have multiple victims. By not exposing and punishing abusers, or worse, by simply shipping them off somewhere else, you are implicitly facilitating further abuse and victims.

    #155 your opinion
    Guest
    #155 your opinion

    I’m seriously trying to figure out if you are a troll, or maybe 11 yrs old or possibly did not take your meds this morning.Are you just an uneducated,insensitive….????How about if something brutal happens to you or your loved one Gd forbid,maybe we should all tell you the same advice you dish out here.Esp.since you are such a torah true person.Revolting.

    educate yourselves
    Guest
    educate yourselves

    Anyone know what the 12 step program is about???The ones who attend do not get “cured” there but acknowledge they will always have the urge and desire to use drugs.Same thing with this perp Sima spoke about.Therapy may help him stop these urges from acting on them but he will always be a s…addict.Rabbis know full well they are in no position to “handle”any of this but they do know how to hide it and dismiss it and make sure NO ONE finds out.So they are the enablers who continue the sick process.Many of you sound so ignorant sorry to… Read more »

    a few thoughts
    Guest
    a few thoughts

    1. Bravo to Sima for having the strength to speak publicly about her experience. 2. Bravo to her husband for supporting her decision, he must be a very special person. 3. When I heard her description of what happened at the meeting with the rabbis, I was dumbfounded to hear that she was told not to say the abuser’s name. What would have been the point of the meeting if not to inform the rabbis what the abuser was doing? I see one comment above that states the rabbi said not to say the name “yet”, surmising that this was… Read more »

    Yichud
    Guest
    Yichud

    Its important to note the laws of yichud. No one should ever be with a person of the opposite gender. Unfortunately, in todays day and age, no adult should be alone with a child without a third party present. Sima’s story is heartbreaking. She is the epitome of poise and strength. However, JCW has been operating out of revenge and emotion, so many innocent people have been hurt. Collateral damage is not acceptable in Judaism. The only good thing about this whole story is that it forces us to talk about it, and the more we do, the less of… Read more »

    agree with #100 and #118
    Guest
    agree with #100 and #118

    Question: what are the rabbis supposed/expected to do? Call the police? Why didn’t you call yourself?
    If you’re putting it in their hands, maybe they sent him to therapy, and took care of it. I don’t know what they did, or what they didn’t do.
    I feel terrible that this happened to you. My question is what we’re you expecting them to do? Anyone please feel free to answer. Thanks.
    P.s. I really feel embarrassing a rov , or anyone for that matter is really wrong.

    I once reported child abuse
    Guest
    I once reported child abuse

    I reported child abuse and my life was shaddered- I was thrown out of my home and left homeless. I was taken advantage of and shunned by members of my family and comunity. I had nothing to eat and no where to go. I ate shabbos meals alone as I moved again and again from different peoples homes. After that expirience you think its easy to report???? And yes I am from Crown Heights.

    Not so simple
    Guest
    Not so simple

    Was this closure for Sima? Does anyone know if there is a danger today, ten years later? Perhaps there should have been an investigation. Perhaps there should be a statute of limitations. JCW is not impartial! They are out to expose the “perps”, but are they truly sensitive to all the issues. There has to be a better way to protect our communities than to dig up old stories and critsize Rabonim.

    To #100
    Guest
    To #100

    There is NO teshuvah. The vast majority of child abusers repeat their abuse, especially when there is a pattern involving multiple victims as there is here. There can be no doubt that there has been additional abuse in the new community since the abuser moved, none whatsoever. Therapy doesn’t work. jail and an informed public are the only defenses.

    Re Rabanim Bashing
    Guest
    Re Rabanim Bashing

    Don’t we all know that there have been many,many cover ups?
    It is time for Rabonim to take real responsibility for this and for the destruction these cover ups caused!!! Only by actually telling these stories and making the public aware can we end the abuse on all fronts.

    Clean up time
    Guest
    Clean up time

    Its time for clean up, investigation and transparency.
    As an aside. Yichud has been mentioned several times.
    A 14yo girl should have never been allowed to be alone or even in casual conversation with a man.
    She should have been taught hakachos of tznius & yichud.
    Chabad houses seem very very lax with mixing genders.
    A frum man running programs for teen girls??? Not appropriate.
    The Rebbe clearly said women & girls to do mivtzoim with women.

    Izzy - Regarding addiction - Guy from 121 & 124
    Guest
    Izzy - Regarding addiction - Guy from 121 & 124

    A person can be cured from addiction. People who say otherwise are: 1) Themselves in a 12 step program where they must believe this in order to work the 12 steps 2) Were told this by people in a 12 step program 3) Are therapist that adhere to the 12 step program or were told this by those therapist Just like back in the day there was no understanding of this problem, today there is “too much” understanding. Most things are not black and white. There are many people who see themselves as have been addicts and can now enjoy… Read more »

    Other side of the story
    Guest
    Other side of the story

    I am writing these words because we have a “mitzvas assay” of “Lo Saamod Al Dam Reyacho” You have no doubt heard that there was a community gathering in LA where a young woman spoke of the abuse she suffered at the hand ofshliach and how local Rabbonim mishandled the situation etc… I called Mrs. Debbi Fox, the woman in LA who has single handedly created a revolution within the frum community to protect victims of abuse. I have been working with her for years and can testify as her complete dedication to the cause of victims and her commitment… Read more »

    12 step program
    Guest
    12 step program

    I am in a 12 step program. And yes I admit that you don’t one day become a “non addict.”
    Addiction is a mental illness that must be treated like all others. The meetings are my medication.
    You say “people can be cured from addiction.” Where is your source? Are you an addict that has been cured? Do you know what the problem even is?

    Warning: Danger ahead
    Guest
    Warning: Danger ahead

    Parents need to be aware and not naive. However, this seems very dangerous to have convictions without a trial. Its very un American, and not halachik. A kohen needs to pasken a metzora tameh, because it is done from ahava, not from revenge. I cannot have confidence in an organization that doesn’t have reputable halachik authorities running it.

    good job sima
    Guest
    good job sima

    Dont worry about all the other stupd comment of how you were wrong i fully support you but next time i dont think it is right to mention the rabbonims names and say outright loshon horah as t is bad things you spoke about them and you didnt even mention the abbusers name. but nevertheless i fully support you and may you machayl el choyil with the ultimate redemtion from all our sorrows with moshiach now

    #9 is right - If your son abused your daughter
    Guest
    #9 is right - If your son abused your daughter

    If your son abused a sibling would you put it on wall of shame?

    What about all the 13 year olds who abuse fellow campers are they put up on wall of shame?

    Abuse is NOT murder
    Guest
    Abuse is NOT murder

    Abuse is a terrible thing and must be stopped.

    Nothing is comparable to murder.

    50 million Americans are SURVIVORS of child molestation.

    There is not a SINGLE survivor of murder. Stop reading JCW propaganda.

    Niether the Rebbe, Nor Shulchan Aruch, Nor Chumash ever compared abuse to Murder. In fact they all rarely spoke about it.

    To 134 from 91
    Guest
    To 134 from 91

    Did u know that the latest coming from universities examining diff types of therapy is that the ‘ new way’ of dealing with traumatic childhoods / events by hashing over is indeed more damaging and now they are saying that the old way of brushing under the carpet ( call it denial if it pleases u) and ‘ moving on’ is indeed healthier ! So my dear, u are wrong and out of touch! I agree with u that it has effected my life and has come out in diff way and that is that I am extremely protective of… Read more »

    Disheartening
    Guest
    Disheartening

    The comments give the impression we consist in kal shebekalim. The goyishkeit oozing throught these and the get threads is astonishing.

    Agree
    Guest
    Agree

    I agree 1000% with #8 that the most claping was when she spoke against the rabbis chutzpah!!! Where is the respect

    To 155
    Guest
    To 155

    Wrong. This isn’t about getting back at abusers, it’s about protecting future victims. Statistically, the vast majority of abusers repeat the abuse and have multiple victims. By not exposing and punishing abusers, or worse, by simply shipping them off somewhere else, you are implicitly facilitating further abuse and victims.

    It's happening again
    Guest
    It's happening again

    So many of the commentators are blaming the victim ,who already went through gehenim,instead of focusing on the perpetrator and those ,yes some were shamefully Rabbis,who enabled him. SHAME ON ALL OF YOU!!!

    To 69 and 112
    Guest
    To 69 and 112

    It’s not too late is it?
    Can they pull the abuser from his positing and spread the story now?

    Chazak V'Amatz
    Guest
    Chazak V'Amatz

    Sima,
    I certainly hope that you are not reading any of the comments here. But, if you are:
    Please realize that nearly the entire Chabad community is on your side, admires you for your courage, and wishes you many, many brochos.
    The silent majority does not have the time erev pesach to post here.
    You somehow found the strength to come forward. Please find the strength to ignore all the nastiness here, and know that you did the right thing.

    to 168
    Guest
    to 168

    I am not sure if you are aware that Debbie Fox isgetting alot.of heat because of a different abuse case that she has covered up. Im afraid she has lost all credibility in this community.

    Children first ALWAYS
    Guest
    Children first ALWAYS

    EVERYTHING AND ANYTHING IS ALLOWED WHEN IT COMES TO PROTECTING OUR INNOCENT CHILDREN. PERIOD.

    Teshuvah
    Guest
    Teshuvah

    If the perp has done teshuvah, I would think he would find a job out of the limelight and to put him self in a position doing outreach etc.. where he has to deal with people on a more intimate basis. I don’t think that you would find a recovered drug addict working in a pharmacy.

    to #173
    Guest
    to #173

    Giluy Aroyos is compared to murder lots and lots of time in halacha. thats what abuse is.

    :'(
    Guest
    :'(

    It pains to see that she is still crying about it.. i went thrugh this not long ago. but the fact that your married, gives me hope for the future…hope i was the last person to go thrugh this hell…

    2 sides to the coin
    Guest
    2 sides to the coin

    To 182: In that case, you mean to say that if your child is a molester, you would protect him as well? There are two sides to each story. What everyone is forgetting here is that we cant jump to conclusions just from one account. Who can check up the credibility of Sima’s words? Who can figure out that perhaps the Rabbanim didn’t cooperate with her for good reason? Who can take upon themselves to discover the sundry missing pieces in her story? No one likes being judged. No one. Keep that in mind before you judge Rabbanim or any… Read more »

    lifelight
    Guest
    lifelight

    Kudos to Sima for doing the right thing. How come only #166 mentioned the real cause of this heartache? Why does the majority of the community purposely neglect the real protection of ALL its members: Laws of Tznius & Laws of Yichud. Did they never learn them and so cannot teach them to their children???? When will they wake up? It is not only the victim that suffers, it is the victim’s whole family that is affected, and consequently the whole community. Wake up Yidden! Shulchan Aruch is our guide and our protection – each and every Yid’s, not just… Read more »

    to 173
    Guest
    to 173

    The chumash calls rape murder.
    Like a man killing another, so is this matter.

    Very brave, very powerful speech
    Guest
    Very brave, very powerful speech

    At last, a courageous young woman speaks out. And, at least, Chabad let’s abused victims speak out, and they are not entirely isolated and shunned, unlike in other Jewish sects.

    No one is Judging
    Guest
    No one is Judging

    Thank you to #186 facilitate and finalize my thoughts on this most disturbing and dangerous problem. I attended an emergency symposium, on this subect 15 years ago which was exremely informative for educational professionals (which I would recommend for everyone). Many facts were conveyed but what stayed in my mind was the fact that this abberational behavior is incorrigible, meaning, there’s no changing it! An aging incarcerated child molester gave a chilling response to the “therapy” group leader’s question “why do you think you were able to get away with this for so long?” “Nobody ever stopped me”, he answered”… Read more »

    JCW vendetta
    Guest
    JCW vendetta

    Why couldn’t JCW have a private database of all alleged and verified molesters which would only be accessible to community leaders and principals who might hire such people for a position which would put them in contact with children. While the victims anger against what happened to them is appreciated this anger is considered idol worshiping. A victims efforts should be solely directed to ensuring that the abuser cannot continue his crimes with others with as little collateral damage as possible. Otherwise it becomes a personal vendetta which can be considered abusive in it’s own right. I do completely agree… Read more »

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