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Sunday, 14 Iyyar, 5779
  |  May 19, 2019

    Are Your Parents Poor?

    From the COLlive inbox: A young Crown Heights resident writes an open letter to the community addressing the issue of poverty. Full Story

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    I am so confused.
    Guest
    I am so confused.

    BH I am having a very difficult time understanding the purpose of this Op-Ed. It makes no sense at all. I don’t understand who the target audience is. I don’t understand what the author is getting at. I don’t understand who the author thinks he is. Someone in the shchuna that’s rachmana litzlan in poverty does not need YOU to tell them what to do. If they are down, TRUST me, they don’t want to be and they don’t need YOU to tell them that they should practice uplifting their spirits. Someone who has money and is able to give… Read more »

    nice
    Guest
    nice

    and kind

    great article! please let me ad one thing
    Guest
    great article! please let me ad one thing

    if B”H you are making a good Parnoso, please don’t show it off by Simchos and other venues. of course you should make a nice Simcha, but please don’t make it stick out.
    it only sets the level higher and higher, forcing those that are barely making ends meat, to keep up, when they cant afford too.
    of cours its you money and you can spend it how you want, but please consider the effect it has on someone else’s Simcha.

    may Hashem bless you and all of us with Parnoso Beshefa

    Adam Curry
    Guest
    Adam Curry

    Wow. Very, very, very well said. Thank you for a well written article.

    as a student and daughter of shluchim
    Guest
    as a student and daughter of shluchim

    i totally understand and hope people will be more understanding

    VERY NICLEY PUT.
    Guest
    VERY NICLEY PUT.

    BRAVO FOR PUTTING THIS INTO WORDS!! GO CHICAGO!

    David
    Guest
    David

    Yuh yuh – make sure the education system is set up so that no one ever learns anything about finance, but convince then that if they learn a lot of Toyreh they know better then anyone in the world.

    When it comes to finance it’s simple: education equals better job, more money etc etc enough with the rely on hashem syndrome, bec hashm wants you to all educate yourself in finance,

    i fully agree
    Guest
    i fully agree

    well written.i also try to participate[even though being a melamed u barely make a parnosoh] when i get paid,by standing in line and u see people reaching for the wallet and the $ in ur wallet doesnt match the bill,by kindly paying it off.

    well said!
    Guest
    well said!

    well said

    true!
    Guest
    true!

    its amazing how touching this is. I wouldnt have expected myself to be so affected, but i guess after growing up in “poverty” and not being necessarily well to do now thats what happens. its an amazing burden which i may never have actually succeeded in rising above, internally. to wake up with debts and bills is practically unbearable, regardless of all the suggestions and stategies. but no one would ever know. i’ve been lucky enough that none would notice this burden. what i want to point out is that crown heights can, in addition to actively helping ease this… Read more »

    thank you
    Guest
    thank you

    beautifuly written!

    thanks
    Guest
    thanks

    for writing this. You are clearly trying to say:
    Hey guys, there are more destitute people around now, many of whom may not have been destitute just a while ago.
    Be alert to their sensitivities. Look to help by being a mentch, by doing what Jews used to do naturally but have recently forgotten.
    We need more such reminders, perhaps one a day!

    to #1
    Guest
    to #1

    dear mister number 1, you clearly are one of those people that this article was speaking about. you must be under the line of poverty and too proud of yourself to do anything about it. it was precisely to people like you that this article was written. the only fathomable reason why someone could possibly react negatively to such a wonderful article is because they feel that their territory has been tramped on. it makes perfect sense to bring to peoples attention that poverty is common nowadays and one shouldnt be apprehensive about getting the help he can. also encouraging… Read more »

    to mr # one
    Guest
    to mr # one

    When someone does something good , dont criticise.
    I think that only positive can come from this letter.
    BTW where is your name let Rabbi wold speak to you in persone if you really care.

    To #1
    Guest
    To #1

    Yikes, it sounds like you have some anger issues or something! No need to get nasty.

    Daughter of shluchim...
    Guest
    Daughter of shluchim...

    …and this says it well, it is a tough situation for anyone to be in and shlichus – living hand to mouth, moving every year, never knowing where the next dollar is coming from – only makes it harder. Thanks, author of this piece. Makin’ me feel I’m not alone.

    chesed
    Guest
    chesed

    it is so nice to read this, and so true. this advice should affect not only CH but every community . This problem is everywhere and it is felt in the same way by struggling families. It is all about chesed. For the fortunate ones who BH don’t have this worry,
    ” Vehahavta lereacha kamocha”
    and to # 1
    it is time to deal with your anger

    to #1
    Guest
    to #1

    besides for being a disturbed person. you are also a hypocrite you ”writer” (after wiping the floors with him) for writing his name in the article and not being as you put it a COWARD and look whos talking i didnt see a name by your comment

    summary
    your a mean hypocrite

    to #1 and #7
    Guest
    to #1 and #7

    #1 listen to comments 13, 14 and 15.
    to #7 are you ok?

    to number one
    Guest
    to number one

    so i guess your one of those “nameless cowards”

    why is this on col
    Guest
    why is this on col

    what does this have to do with the shidduch crisis

    Authors intentions
    Guest
    Authors intentions

    I really do think the authors intentions were for the good, but unfortunately today it goes much deeper than this…It is not just children expecting things from their parents but what SOCIETY expects in general. You mention seminary – unfortunatelly today if a girl doesnt go to a top seminary (minimum $12,000 – 18,000 a year!!!) than she doesnt have the best name when she is looking for a shidduch etc… If a bochur is an incredible brilliant learner but his parents cant pay for a top yeshiva ($15,000 minimum) than he also doesnt have the best ‘name’. Unfortunately social… Read more »

    Explosive!!!
    Guest
    Explosive!!!

    Whoa!! Number 1!! What ANGER!!! What did this guy write already to warrant such a major response??????? T.G. you were the only one to feel this way and all the others including myself, totally commend him for his article!! Very well written!!
    You’re sounding rather dangerous/ explosive????? Hatzlocha

    agree with #3
    Guest
    agree with #3

    agree with #3

    Plase quit the bashing
    Guest
    Plase quit the bashing

    ones enough

    a man with a heart
    Guest
    a man with a heart

    I don’t understand why anyone would knock this person. He is bringing out into the open this problem and making myself as well as many others feel connected and “unity”

    coward #1
    Guest
    coward #1

    So why isnt your name signed?

    ehhhhh
    Guest
    ehhhhh

    seems like a pointless article, was probably revised a hundred times so it lost its touch.
    im sure you meant well

    In Poverty
    Guest
    In Poverty

    I live well below the poverty line. Due to various circumstances, we currently have almost no income, we are working on education and looking for jobs etc. The schools are a big issue for us. we don’t have money for necessities and the schools call for money all the time. When we were able to pay, we did, but now we can’t. If not for food stamps, we would literally starve. When we have asked for help from people, we have at times gotten and other time not. We are not obviously ‘poor” to the world as we got good… Read more »

    been there done that
    Guest
    been there done that

    being poor sucks, however you cut it.

    they say the test of being rich is harder than being poor…..read the first sentence again.

    pray alot to G-d He really does listen and in the mean time you have the comfort that you are in it with Him.

    Imi Onoichi Betzoroh – Trust only in Him it WILL help pull you through those very difficult moments.

    to # 22
    Guest
    to # 22

    It’s been like that for years! even it the shtetl, the daughters of rich people got married to the best and the poor men had so many daughters to marry and no money so nobody wanted them…
    ans yes, it is all from hashem, do your part but even if you got an education if hashem wants you not to succeed you won’t succeed so bitachon is the foundation of our belief,ani maamin…

    there is a way out of poverty!
    Guest
    there is a way out of poverty!

    Not to minimize the role Hashem plays, but there are jobs out there if you look hard and are willing to get some basic training, which is also available either free or at low cost.
    Resources such the the Community Council have advice and training programs available, asa well as grants for education- use them!

    disagree with #3
    Guest
    disagree with #3

    disagree with #3. ppl should learn to be happy for the person……..tame your jeoulsy or how it affects u.

    #16 comment
    Guest
    #16 comment

    i don’t understand this! I am ffb who’s parents aren’t shluchim and i am a father of a few children k”h. Shluchim don’t have to pay tuition, they get shabbos meals paid for. Always hands out for this and that! Some shluchim live much better then anash.
    And why is everything shluchim????
    4000 shluchim and over 200,000 anash??? who’s representing us?

    To #16, #29 I'm with u...
    Guest
    To #16, #29 I'm with u...

    Yes there r others like u who wear a clever mask but whos hearts pound with fear on how to eat tomorrow, how to pay last months rent, how to answer the shabbos guest calls, how to pay the tuition u put off but gave ur word on, How to cover the bank” How to answer ur children when u hear a hopeful or desperate voice say “.did u?….” , “my hat”, “”my friends…” And the even more sensitive unprintable needs. Yes we are employed but at a bare min salary. Yes weve made the efforts to improve parnassah, but… Read more »

    I am the poverty stricken woman with the real LV bag
    Guest
    I am the poverty stricken woman with the real LV bag

    This was a great article. THANK YOU. I am someone who would have read this article last year and thought that this would never be me iy”h. I have an excellent profession and things have been very good for me financially. That was last year. My husband ‘s business folded. Out of left field, I lost my job. We were not show off people. We lived a very simple life. I went out of my way to underdo everything I had. (The LV bag couldnt be seen as LV because it had no design – so for the synical commentators,… Read more »

    that's life
    Guest
    that's life

    My last four shiddach dates all wanted to know how much money I have, earn, or come from. Not a single one cared about who I am as a wonderful person that can make a terrific home with my excellent cooking and nuturing skills. Sad!

    to 13 and 22
    Guest
    to 13 and 22

    very well put

    a yasoma
    Guest
    a yasoma

    how about us with only one pearent and no money
    shidduchim are not easy for us

    Great Article
    Guest
    Great Article

    I am a daily reader of COL. I recommend more articles of this nature. Most of your other articles are news items for Shluchim or their friends and relatives. This article speaks to me, the average Bal Habayit who struggles to keep up. My family of four children with tuition, living costs and all needs a minimum of $120,000 gross a year. At a $90,000 a year salary, I feel like a beggar. I cannot imagine large families with 50-60 thousand dollar fross income.

    Go Boruch Sholom Go
    Guest
    Go Boruch Sholom Go

    You are a great writer. Which Yeshiva taught you the skill of writing. Was it the Chader in Chicago?

    The TRUTH
    Guest
    The TRUTH

    B”H Personally growing up in a home where each month’s rent was a miracle, I can tell you how it really is… As a child my parents gave me all they could, and when they couldn’t I understood, I had to. I didn’t go to a top seminary- got accepted but couldn’t afford it and landed in good old Beth Rivkah Seminary. To top it off, I didn’t go to any type of college/university to get a degree etc, because my Mashpia was against it. And guess what? Baruch Hashem shidduchim was a breeze, and I’m married to a great… Read more »

    wow
    Guest
    wow

    they put article which has nothing to do with the shidduch crises….!!! LOL!!!!

    to #34
    Guest
    to #34

    Where do you get the idea that shluchim don’t pay tuition. Aren’t their children entitled to an education too ? For some there is on line school, at thousands of dollars per child, a good computer with all attachments for each, a private turor for secular subjects, such as reading, writing and math, and until the children also learn to read and write English a parent has to sit with them throughout the online classes. For those that don’t get onto the online school, it’s a full time job for the parent. And no second incomes from a wife’s work… Read more »

    to 34   1 agree 100% with 3
    Guest
    to 34 1 agree 100% with 3

    it has nothing to do with jealousy, it is about setting a standard of Simcha that the REGULAR MAN can afford.

    to author, 36 and 40
    Guest
    to author, 36 and 40

    author and 36, you hit the nail RIGHT on the head. i choked up reading this article b/c i am one of these people that this article is about. you negative ppl, all i can say is i truly hope you never feel our pain. to #40 i read your comment and laugh. 90G and YOU feel like a beggar??????????? how many leased cars do you have??????? how many bungalows do you own???????? how many times in the past 5 yrs have you gone on vacation??????? when was the last time you thought about your neighbor or the guy sitting… Read more »

    My Parents Are Poor
    Guest
    My Parents Are Poor

    My parents ARE poor but I still need a cell phone like all the rest of the kids in my class. Why should I be the only nerd who can’t text anyone? Other kids give me a nebech face when I ask to borrow their cell phones to make a call. A cell phone is more important to me than food for lunch. I can survive without lunch and would gladly go hungry if it got me a cell phone.

    Just because my parents are poor, do I need to be the nebech????

    resident
    Guest
    resident

    How about this, A well to do parent from Oholei Torah PTA called and asked me tp send in 25 dollars with my son for chanuka gelt. I mentioned that it is abit much for me at the moment and would send in a bit less as i have a couple of children and 25 each is a lot. Her response, ” Thsats what everyone else is giving and the rebbi works hard.” I am in no way denying that , but i just cant afford it.!!!!!!!!!

    a young mother
    Guest
    a young mother

    Imagine this , My daughter wants uggs because thats what her friends are flaunting now, these young children are getting manicures , asking my girls what restaurant we ate in and why dong we have a WII. the simple reason, these are not neccesary things and therefore i cannot afford to buy them now. parents whose children have these things, I am very happy for you that you thank g-d are making it but how about also teaching your chuildren to be sensitive to others . It really hurts mw when i have to tell my kids so many times… Read more »

    #42, Thank you
    Guest
    #42, Thank you

    Very well said about the rucnius side of the matter., the miracles etc. True a lot is perspective but thats not all-bottom line is bottom line when going through this defficult nisayon, Dvening, Emunah all imp but the yeshua sometimes soesnt magically appear as regularly as the collection calls and the cut off notices.

    Wishing you contiued good Mazel and Brachah bgasmiush uvruchnius

    However when one is bh financially stable its hard to understand the struggle even if your parents have been there.

    # 7
    Guest
    # 7

    very well said !!

    #47
    Guest
    #47

    My dear child, I cried when I read your comment. I am sad for you and feel your pain. You are NOT a “nebech” or a “nerd” because you don’t have a cell phone. You sound smart and mature – much more than those classmates! Maybe one day you will realize that Hashem has given you a different form of “wealth” – it might be called health, nachas, shidduch or by some other name. Wealth is not always measured by $ in bank account. Maybe you will one day realize that some of us are “poor” in $, but really… Read more »

    to #42 and #48
    Guest
    to #42 and #48

    to 42, you should publish the stories of how Hashem helped at zero hour.
    #48, I am with you. I can’t stand that “throw money around” attitude as though you have a way to get the money but you are just to cowardly to scam someone. Send what you feel is fair for Chanukah gelt and too bad what the wealthy caller thinks. Yes the rebbe works hard but if you don’t have it, don’t give it. Sometimes you have to ignore insensitive people and do what is right for you. You don’t need her approval.

    agree with number 1
    Guest
    agree with number 1

    and 21.
    this is a waste of time. doesnt capture what it should
    the shidduch crisis stuff is also a waste of time, for other reasons – too bad its not only a waste of time but worse…
    stop bashing him for his tone of voice, what he said was right.

    btw i wrote number 10

    Good job
    Guest
    Good job

    This was a thoughtful and real article.im sure the author has helped others and continues to. Kol hakavod and may we take this seriously.

    To #52 "A Rich but Poor Grown-Up"
    Guest
    To #52 "A Rich but Poor Grown-Up"

    Your response to #47 is amazing and thought provocing. Thank you.

    Shluchim have it all
    Guest
    Shluchim have it all

    As the son of a Shliach, I was always under the impression that my parents were making a living. We had nice food for Shabbos – of course for the guests. My father had a descent car (usually 4-5 years old) not a beat up station wagon from the early 90s and everything seemed like we were living a standard middle class life. I went to Yeshiva, got older and heard about some difficulties. When I came home this time, I was told not to pick up the phones. The creditors were calling off the hook. My siblings were in… Read more »

    Right Chinuch!~
    Guest
    Right Chinuch!~

    to #49
    We need to teach our kids from day 1 not to look at others and to appreciate what they have. Give your kids tons of love and TIME and respect and positive compliments and they will cherish you instead of ugs.

    to #34
    Guest
    to #34

    Shluchim DO pay tuitiion and have no choice but to send the kids away. We managed to keep afloat week by week untill the schools came after us each wanting 5-10 thousand dollars and that was the beginning of the end for us. Our day to day living expenses are eaten up by tuition!

    Shimon Cohen
    Guest
    Shimon Cohen

    Boruch Sholom- you said what need to be said and woke up lot of Anash. Yasher Koach!!

    Somebody
    Guest
    Somebody

    About 80 years ago in Europe, an older, frum couple died of starvation r”l because they were too embarrassed and proud to ask the community for help. Obviously that’s an extreme case, but I’m making a point. If people need help, they should work hard on themselves to overcome their pride and ask for it. If you see your neighbor in dire need and they won’t ask anyone for help, call Benji Stock of CSSY and tip him off to it.( If you can, send CSSY money — they need huge amounts of it, right now especially, in order to… Read more »

    Go boruch shalom!
    Guest
    Go boruch shalom!

    Whats greater then the article itself is that u cared to write it! Keep it up

    22....exactly
    Guest
    22....exactly

    number 22 …..couldnt agree more!

    To 48
    Guest
    To 48

    I too am a hard working Rebbe. I can tell you that although $ helps,it really is the thought that counts. Never mind the $25.Just send a heartfelt note thanking the Rebbe and wishing him A Freilichin Chanukah. Whats attached isnt as important.It can be $10 or $5 or even a home baked pastry.

    #44
    Guest
    #44

    i know many classmates who are shluchim, who always taking vacations, redoing kitchens and making lavershing personal simchas and get the 50% discount for shluchim on education. PLus they put down classmates who don’t have the latest hanna monta lunch box. Think about the anash that pay for shluchim out there!!!
    We all are poor with 5 kids to feed and tuition!

    B"H
    Guest
    B"H

    Uggs
    A new coat when last years fits fine
    cellphones
    wii
    etc
    whats the point?
    target sells great kids boots
    last years coat will keep them just as warm
    cellphones are bad for teenagers on many levels
    and doing some real excercise or playing real games is just as good as a wii

    And it is actually possible to be a well adjusted family with this attitude.

    Work on family priorities and values.

    Not to take away from the nisayon of poverty. It is real and it is bitter, but todays emphasis on all kinds of unessecary gashmius doesn’t help matters.

    Inspirational reading
    Guest
    Inspirational reading

    In the book ‘The Jew And His Home’ by Rabbi Kitov, there is a great chapter titled ‘On sufficing with little’. It will give you chizuk.

    poverty is everything
    Guest
    poverty is everything

    Sure, poverty is an issue old as mankind, has no solutions, lots of suggestions, desperately overlooked by both those who are well off and also those who aren’t. Aghh, nothing new here. But we don’t realize how poverty is the underlying truth behind the entire shiduch blogging and viritually every family fight that existed. Poverty molds the newly wed’s relationship with their in-laws. With each other. POVERTY is EVERYTHING The economy has absolutely nothing to do with anybody living a yiddishe lifestyle. we have insane tuition to pay and luxary rated houseing expenses. Job availability also has nothing relevent for… Read more »

    to #34
    Guest
    to #34

    why do u assume that shluchim don’t pay tuition??? AND GET THEIR SHABBOS FOOD PAID FOR?? We not only pay tuition but we pay day camp and out of town seminaries plus many of us help Baalei Teshuvah and other community member with their tuition and their shabbos costs when they are starting out.

    Practical Reading
    Guest
    Practical Reading

    1. keep your relationships healthy. you never know when you’ll need your parents or siblings. Never burn your bridges. 2. Get rid of your big “hasoges.” instead of Bloomingdales and Macy’s there is Target. and Kmart. And yes their furniture is perfectly acceptable for any home. 3. Spend wisely; kill the shopping leak. But don’t be too cheap – the 10c you save by making that trip to black friday will cost you a tank of gas. 4. if your kid wants a lot of money and you have to decide between loosing the kid and loosing your house: Give… Read more »

    member of Anash
    Guest
    member of Anash

    One of the ways to help us cope with thses types of nisyonos is to realize that life is like a circle, and things don’t alwys stay the same, just as a cirlcle turns, so too will your mazal turn, G-d willing , for the good. ….and also to try to find ways to make oneslef happy, like go for a walk with your husband , spend more time with your kids, it doesn’t have to cost any money or too much money, try to remind oneself that, as the Rebbe writes in Hayom Yom, (Sivan 30) in matters of… Read more »

    Come to Israel
    Guest
    Come to Israel

    And stop whining…

    to 72
    Guest
    to 72

    oh is it free to go to israel now if people are on the brink i have no clue of what could happen there……i personally would love to live there. but i cant even afford a ticket to go let alone a soda once i got offf the flight .

    israel is no better......
    Guest
    israel is no better......

    no better at all……

    To #7 - College does not equal success
    Guest
    To #7 - College does not equal success

    You are right but you are also wrong. I went to college, I have a bachelor’s degree in accounting and an MBA in finance. At the moment I am writing this comment from my office computer where I am managing a multi-million dollar company which was started by a group of bochurim 7 years ago. None of which had any schooling other than limudei kodesh only cheder. I’ve worked with many lubavitcher clients in the past who also did not have any formal secular education and are successful beyond any of my coworkers who have spent years in college. College… Read more »

    Gelt is the root of everything
    Guest
    Gelt is the root of everything

    This piece touches the root of life, inside and outside Chabad. In American society, success is measured in finances. I left CH because we lived solely on tzadakah, I left to get a college education to support my family, I left again the advice I was given. My adult children are shomer shabbos, unmarried and as the years go by, it looks dimmer and dimmer. Everything is from Hashem-we need to strive to do our best, to make a keli, but we also have to know to be appreciative with the little, now matter how little it seems in front… Read more »

    moshiach
    Guest
    moshiach

    as i read this on yud tes kislev and i know all the stories are true as my family lives like this too i think to myself chassidim one of the signs of moshiach are the world will be full of money but noone will have any. so i say to myself dont be upset hang in there as Rebbi Akiva laughed when he saw a fox runining out of the Kodesh Kodeshim. If all the negative prophercies and all the postive prophercies(seeing from one side of the world to the other etc). we will see Moshiach today yud tes… Read more »

    Thank you #75 well said and practical.
    Guest
    Thank you #75 well said and practical.

    The most imp thing you can teach ur child to help ensure his success as an adult be int in finface, shlichius or chinuch is to be motivated, energetic, dedicated and positive

    That's What I Call A  Brainer!!!!!!!!
    Guest
    That's What I Call A Brainer!!!!!!!!

    I’d like to share that our mind is very powerful. As told some people in the holocaust survived and others didn’t and eventhough everything is bashert I do believe that we live what we believe. If we believe we’re a victim/ poor/poverty stricken/ etc… any limiting label we will always be that way and our kids and our grandkids. I see that people that do feel like they are living in reality and cannot live have a dilemma! They can either try to feel like they are stepping on eggshells by worrying what other people will think and if G-dforbid… Read more »

    75 is correct
    Guest
    75 is correct

    I too was brought up in OT and went on to get my stupid college degree. At first I didn’t realize what the problem was; all the shtusim i was fed was simply ventilated out my ears and flushed down the toilet. Then I graguated with honors. the certificate could pass as a sheet of Kleenex. But after telling other bocherim to do what I did, I came to realize that it is a mistake: not everybody is fortunate enough to grow up with a sound foundation of yidishkeit as I did. I’ve been to farbrengens and went through most… Read more »

    to 79
    Guest
    to 79

    A family of 6 require annual income north of 100k to live middle class in NY and a family of 12 require north of 200k, so even though proper attitude and mindset decrease your chances of poverty, it is certainly no guarantee to achieve a comfortable six figure income. There are plenty of poor that aren’t guilty for their situations.

    CALM DOWN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    Guest
    CALM DOWN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    to number 81
    Guest
    to number 81

    Yes ur right no reason to feel guilty all the reason to take action and the rest is up to G-d and action is in our hands! What I mean that the rest is up to G-d is the results is what we have no control over and by feeling sorry for ourselves we tend to not take action and stay that way! And in addition to that we can rely on G-d that He is taking care of us – HE WIll provide what we need and want and that’s not our buisness to pretend to play G-d! IT’s… Read more »

    A Divisive Article
    Guest
    A Divisive Article

    A very divisive article, that points to the realities of things, but causes anger.

    in response to the second suggestion in article
    Guest
    in response to the second suggestion in article

    Which said if your a child of parents struggling don’t ask. I disagree children, teens, and adults can and deserve to ask whatever the heck they want!!! If the parent can’t say no that’s their issue. For a child to feel responsible for their parents responsiblity that’s called parentifed which means too much responsibility for the child. It’s not healthy to put a child in that position of feeling guilty to ask for their basic needs!!!! A healthy parent will make sure their children’s needs are met and can say no if necessary! It only makes kids insecure to feel… Read more »

    the main thing is 'do somthing'
    Guest
    the main thing is 'do somthing'

    my dad had to borrow $200 to make a family simcha. when he lost his business, he drove a car service/cab to earn a living. there is no shame in earning an honost living. the main thing is “do something”.

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    Guest
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    First of all many ‘children’ are over 18 and still living on the largesse of their parents. They can be mentshlich and not even make requests of their parents that they have clear advance knowledge that they are beyond their parent’s ability to finance. Even young children, if they are aware of their parents financial hardships should be taught not to repeatedly and incessantly badger their parents once they are told we cannot afford to grant you the luxury you request. There is historical precedent where due to economic hardship; decent parents denied their children cell phones, Nintendos, laptops, donuts,… Read more »

    shadow'
    Guest
    shadow'

    usually I’m of the opinion that one should put name to word – but in this instance where the author declares himself excluded from the stragglers, it would be wiser, dignified and genuine to the article and following comments to have remained anonymous, – like a colored person calling a colored person black is not a social crime, etc etc etc

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