By Sholom
I am a bochur learning at a Lubavitcher Yeshiva here in the U.S. (and no, you don’t know who I am. I have never written before and just not the type to do this kind of stuff).
A few weeks ago I, along with tens of fellow bochurim, was privileged to serve as a staff member at the Kinus Tzeirei Hashluchim that ran simultaneously to the international Kinus Hashluchim in Crown Heights.
I would like to share a few thoughts that crossed my mind repeatedly over the course of those three days.
Weeks and months of preparation by the dedicated and highly qualified head staff working alongside the Shluchim office paid off. From the first moment until the last the kids experienced an action packed, well planned program that they will surely remember, discuss, and discuss again in great detail until next year’s Kinus and afterward.
“Rebbe I know you are here now with me … You are the life inside of me” – we sang again and again as the impressionable young children slowly grasped the important message that the Kinus organizers wished to convey. The power and glory of children on Shlichus is extolled constantly throughout the Kinus, and the message is driven home.
I am in no way saying that the staff did not do a sufficiently good job or that other concepts should have been promoted – leave those decisions to the professionals and to those who actually put in hundreds of hours of blood sweat and tears to make the program happen.
I just want to share a different perspective of life on Shlichus that was stressed a little less. Indeed, maybe it is an aspect of Shlichus overlooked all too often, beyond the question of a camp theme.
Life on Shlichus is hard. There is a lot of work, no money and very little recognition. Perhaps the most challenging aspect is the sometimes excruciating loneliness, with no one in the city or even state with whom to share an honest moment of companionship.
And the Shliach’s child? He, by no fault of his own and not by consequence of his own decision, shares much of the same fate.
He grows up alone, spending his time reading or looking out the window whilst children his age across the country run the school halls and streets happily with their friends. Maybe he has a couple friends, children from irreligious homes to whom he is constantly on display as a religious child or, if he is lucky, he has virtual friends on the online school.
And of course, there are those children who at a young age leave the warmth of their homes to live by relatives or family friends, always well meaning but sometimes incapable of providing emotionally for their young charges, especially if they are getting on in age.
True, you are the crown jewel of the Jewish people and should be recognized as its most glorious sector, its pride and joy. But do you not deserved to be acknowledged as its most self sacrificing too?
And so, I and many other Bochurim/Shluchim/parents/Lubavitcher’s and members of Klal Yisroel have something to say to you (and yes, we are talking to you, Mendy, Levi and Zalman). We won’t call you brave or courageous or the Holiest of the Holy. We won’t tell you how much Nachas you give Hashem and the Rebbe (which is all true). We will tell you that we acknowledge your difficulties.
We salute you…
We salute every slight discomfort in your life. We salute your endless hours of loneliness as you count down the days and minutes until camp or the Kinus or your next trip home.
We salute every moment that you have to give up spending with your father and mother because they are busy with their community work. We salute the discomfort of constantly being on display as the city’s only religious Jews.
We salute the Shabbos and Yom Tov, the event and program that you have to work so hard to prepare. We salute the lack of Jewish education that may leave you a little behind your peers academically when you will arrive at Mesivta age. And we salute every tear that falls from your eyes as you sit homesick thousands of miles away from home.
Wow so uplifting!☺️
a 13 year old shlucha living away from home.
Thank you for acknowledging. Shluchims kids are to humble to say how it is, so thanks for bringing it out!
very nice
thank you for writing this!!
This brought tears to my eyes!
This is the hardest part of being on shlichus, our children not having friends their own age to be with and yes they eagerly look forward to once or twice a year when they can be together and just be normal yiddishe kinderlach with friends their own age.
Thank you for your message it will be passed on, we salute you too!!!
So well said, and articulated.
Incredibly beautiful post. Thank you for writing
I am middle aged, and went through the same thing. It’s always hard to be the lone frum kids. I wish the kids (and their parents) growing up in large frum communities realized. But they really can’t. Know that wherever Hashem spins us (we are all dreidlach) is by Hashgacha Pratis. Stay strong and happy! You are beloved kids. Nun, Gimel, Hei, Shin=358=Moshiach http://www.inner.org
Remember – the Rebbe said the shluchim children are his children and he WILL TAKE CARE OF THEM! They are special in the Rebbe’s eyes.
Thank you for your kindness and empathy. I grew up on Shlichus and I can tell you, its hard to be so isolated. I also wasn’t as well prepared for Mesivta as kids who grew up in frum communties.
finally someone realizes!!! I’m sorry to say but I hate being told ‘Your giving the Rebbe so much nachas!’ and things like that. Your letter truly showed how I feel; no yiddishkeit whatsoever where I live, no friends (except for online) and I also know exactly what life in CH is like…So thanks for your letter – just saying ‘I salute you’ means a lot to me.
– A 12 year old shlucha in a far flung place
you took the words outa my mouth!!
a 13 year old shlucha
As shluchim in a farvorfene vinkel, your words are more meaningful than you will know. Our youngest of 9 KAH is home alone without any siblings and with no chevra in a mostly senior community. Our children and their chinuch is muchmore challenging than lack of funds etc…It is quite impressive that a young bochur can really empathize and articulate the challenge our children face. We really need the yeshivos and girl schools that we struggle to send them to, to give that extra varmkeit that they need.
Such a letter should be given to the staff of our summer camps there are many Shluchim’s kids.. And it’s all they have.
Thanks for writing what you did. Sometimes the Shliach with the biggest and nicest building is shown respect. Thanks for reaching out and sincerely recognizing the children who live in smaller cities and don’t have friends nearby.
we really apreciate it!! thanks so much
the shluchim kids
Beautiful sentiments. I’m happy to see a positive letter, not complaints or criticism!
– a 13 year old shlucha
I’m a Shliach in a community which practically has no kids for my children to be friends with. I’m VERY HAPPY & proud to be on Shlichus and I’m happy for my children to be growing up on Shlichus and “to be paying the price” of being in The Rebbe’s Army. That being said, I do constantly hear from & feel bad for my children who are terribly lonely on Shabbos & Yom Tov (and they ARE lucky to have a real Chabad school only 40 minutes away – something which other young Shluchim do not have). Your obvious discontent… Read more »
Wow..very timely as well!!
Frailichen Chanukah!
I have siblings on shlichus in far flung places and they are true examples of what you wrote about. No friends to hang out with after school…no school apart from online school! I was privileged to spend time with them this summer and see how truly selfless they are. We don’t realize how lucky we are living in a frum community!
You get it!
This what these forums are for
Finally something positive
Happy chanukah!
Thank you for this!My eineckle lives with me and yes im a loving hands on Bubby BUT i am not his mommy and i see first hand how hard this is for him on a daily basis.
I will show this to him and let him know YOU CARE
so well written, you hit it right on the money. Our kids are fortunate to be in a Lubavitcher school in Crown Heights, yet their life at home is completely different of their friends that they’re in school with. They very often are in lonely situations and give up so much for our community every single day. Hashem should bentch all our children with the Koach to continue to do the Rebbe’s shlichus.
Yes it is hard and at times difficult but it is an investment in a future job as a shaliach to the area. Every career requires sacrifice. The payback is when we, the shaliach’s kid, is grown up, married and needs a job.
So well written! Pls give us your name! Thank you for saying alloud what we are all thinking and feeling!
Go lamed tea
whoever you are, your display of empathy is so beautiful. As a shlucha and mother of young children experiencing so much of what you described in this letter, I want to thank YOU! Thank you for seeing it and acknowledging it.
when we know people understand, it helps us not to feel so alone.
how beautiful would the world be if we could all put ourselves in the shoes of another and try to feel what it must be like to be in that situation.
Devarim sheyotzim min haleiv nichnasim laleiv
Yasher koiach!
What a beautiful letter, and how true every word is. Many of us grew up in big communities and then went on Shlichus and cannot even begin to imagine the loneliness that our children have to contend with on a daily basis.
And may they see and salute the Rebbe very speedly and tell the Rebbe “we did it all for Hashem and the Rebbeim!”
As a shlucha i appreciate what you say, for putting into words what so many people do not understand and do not see, and for appreciating that! Thank you for dedicating those few days to the Kinnus. its the highlight of our year.
Thank you for your beautiful encouragement and understanding. As the daughter of shluchim, I was sent away from home at a young age and experienced loneliness and a need to grow up very young. Obviously, I gained so much from it too and am forever thankful to my parents for instilling in me a pride and a burning to desire to fulfill the rebbe’s shlichus. Now, as a Shlucha living in an isolated place, my children are growing up the same way. While it was a decision we made, and we are doing the best we can to make sure… Read more »
I’m sure the Rebbe also has nachas from your appreciation and concern for these special Yaldei Hashluchim
Thank you, beautiful, 100% right.
What a beautiful tribute! I think you have encapsulated everything these children stand for. For me too it is hard not to have any grandchildren living close by and so expensive to travel half way across the world to visit. You have helped me see the value in their messirus nefesh and I feel prouder than ever of their sacrifice for other yidden and envious of their zchus.
Thank you for your meaningful words.
As Mom of 4th generation of Shluchim – I can tell you that every word you say is true!
Thank you for stating the obvious unsung Heros
As a veteran Shaliach for over 35 years
Our children have experienced every thing you described
The kinnus/Tzeirei / summer camp is a life saver
The messiras nefesh the kids deal with
Day in and day out are insurmountable
Salute to the future soldiers of the rebbe’s army
Thank you for this beautiful post, which i believe every Shliach should pass on to their children, i will certainly pass it on to mine.
Beautiful made me tear up