By Shainy Peysin for COLlive
Human memory is a fascinating process of encoding, storage and retrieval. Much like a computer, the brain files away information for later use. However, unlike a computer, the retrieval process is not always entirely accurate. Especially when information is filed away for months or years at a time. And especially when that information is composed of numerous details and nuances.
This is only one of the many reasons why women can benefit from Taharas Hamishpocha review classes. Kallah classes are always on the pre-wedding checklist, along with the gown, shaitel and wedding registry. But how often do married women make a point of reviewing these vital and sometimes complex halachos? Sometimes, that answer is “never.”
Mrs. Nechama Dinah Lipsker, Crown Heights kallah teacher, recommends that married women, of every age and stage attend review classes once a year. Is that too often? Not at all.
“I guarantee that every time, you will come away with a tip, a story, a perspective, to enhance your mitzvah,” she says. More often though, the learning is on a much more practical level. From discovery of forgotten halachos, misinterpretation or misunderstandings and just simple clarification, reviews continue to benefit women on many levels.
Shabbos happens every week. For a mitzvah that is kept once every seven days, one could be forgiven for thinking that they’ve got it down pat. Yet, new situations always crop up and Rabbonim are kept on their toes with the constant “what ifs” and “what abouts”. “The diaper delivery arrived on Shabbos, can I use it right away?” “How can I ask my not Jewish neighbor to turn off the oven?” Sometimes, the challenge is getting the answers, and sometimes, it’s about knowing to ask the questions!
Learning kallah classes before marriage is somewhat like learning how to swim from a book. A few years down the line, the practical applications bring about a whole new perspective, and the need for refresher classes takes on new meaning. Plus, new tips and hashkafos can really make the world of a difference, even to something you’ve been doing for a long time. “Most of the time, these are basic halachos we’re talking about, not even chumros,” she says.
Review classes are endorsed and encouraged by all rabbonim. The Rebbe himself encouraged attending Taharas Hamishpocha reviews on numerous occasions as a benefit to marriage. They can also act a segula for having children. Mrs. B. of Crown Heights organized two review classes on separate occasions, each following with the birth of a child. Another woman, childless for four years, hosted a review in her home despite the bad timing for her and good deal of reluctance, which was probably forgiven after it led to a pregnancy!
Often, reviews are organized for groups of friends or neighbors or open to the women of the community. The response is overwhelming and one class just leads to another. For a mitzvah that is so powerfully linked to the spiritual health of our families, the benefits are endless.
Crown Heights alone has a number of kallah teachers and women in other communities can certainly contact their local kallah teachers or rebbetzins to arrange classes. While the best method is certainly attending a class in person, mikvah.org also offers a six-part course online.
If you are interested in hosting or arranging a Taharas Hamishpocha review class, please contact Mrs. Lipsker at 718-771-4011, or [email protected].
Reviews are so important! I’m so happy that I went to Mrs. Lipsker’s review given in the summer. It helped me in so many ways: the hashkafa was uplifting, practical tips when the mitzvah can be overwhelming, and most of all, it helped me realize that I was ‘self paskening’ too many days for my period, since I was still seeing brown color and I thought that I couldn’t do a Hefsek Taharah. Mrs Lipsker guided me to speak to the rav and I was able to do my HT on time! One gets used to doing things a certain… Read more »
Very important especially at the end of a pregnancy!