Apr 11, 2013
Let's Thank the Unthanked
Rabbi Avrohom Lieder of Ahavas Chessed is one of those people

From the COLlive inbox: I'm not here to complain, just to say something to those who are rarely thanked or remembered.

By Chana

Research has shown that societies collapse unless individuals go out of their way, at a cost to themselves, to ensure that they themselves, as well as others, do the right thing.

How many of us can truthfully say that we do this? How many of us care when a neighbor in our building gives birth and offer her a meal? How many of us see someone hurting and try to relieve some of their pain? How many of us say thank you to the people that spend the most hours with our children, day in, day out, week after week?

How many of us can say that we play a real part in keeping this community of Crown Heights alive? How many of us want our kids to grow up with the same passive attitude towards our community that we ourselves are demonstrating?

Don't get me wrong, there are plenty of people in this community who open their doors many months of the year to guests and Shluchim from around the world. There are those that volunteer for PTA and do it very happily.

I am not here to complain, just to say thank you to the people that dedicate their entire lives to our community. The ones who lead by example. They may host fancy dinners or events, but the hours and work that go into those programs are never billable. These heroes do not work from 9am-5pm. These people are rarely thanked. Nor are they remembered years later, when circumstances change and they are no longer in the picture.

Let's start with the principals, teachers and staff at our schools. The ones that not only get paid late, but are not even told when they can expect their next pay check. They show up every day, prepared, with goodies and lessons for our children. I promise you, they aren't in this job because they can't find a better one. They are there every day because they truly care for your child.

And then there are all the organizations that our neighborhood can proudly boast about:
* Ten Yad who aids young couples in setting up their homes like mentschen when they first get married.
* KSCVK who assists financially strapped families with paying for their childrens weddings.
* Simchas Shabbos V'Yom Tov (CSSY) and the Yom Tov Fund who provides families with food for Yomim Tovim and Shabbosim.
* Friendship Circle who lends a hand to families with special needs children.
* Bikur Cholim who provide hospital visitations, meals, transportation to families with medical conditions.
* The Beis Medrash and Yagdil Torah who provide shiurim to people that want to learn.
* Ahavas Chesed who pays bills for medical conditions and has a soup kitchen.
* Tzivos Hashem who provides our children with Chassidishe Chinuch.
* Nechama's Closet who provides clothing for new brides.
* Nshei Chabad who encourage our wives and daughters to grow and learn.
* Hatzalah of Crown Heights whose volunteers are ready to help in any emergency 24/7, saving lives every day, with caring and compassion.
The list goes on and on....

Tonight I wish to salute the fine people who run these organizations. Everything in this world is decreed from above - whether you are rich or poor, healthy or sick, a giver or a receiver. It may even be that at different stages in your life, you will fall into different categories.

No one chooses to be poor, sick or needy. But thanks to these organizations, these families are taken care of in a dignified and exemplary fashion. The directors don't get thanked nor do they receive gifts from the families they assisted. But they are still there every day, worrying, caring and helping. I don't wish it upon anyone to need their services but who knows what He has in store?

It is you that makes sure that Crown Heights remains a community. That a concept called Chessed exists in the lives of our children. That my cousin, my neighbor and the stranger are all being looked after. Thank you for making sure that this circle of giving continues to spin.

You don't have to be part of an organization to keep Crown Heights alive. Send your child's teacher a gift "just" to say thank you. Show up at a function to show your support. Make a donation to an organization that you have been helped by or know someone else who has been. Send flowers to a volunteer for her birthday. Offer a meal to a neighbor in your building who recently gave birth. Show that you care.

Most Read Most Comments

Opinions and Comments
Finally a worthy Op-ed, I think it is okay to name people in this one :)
I hope that many will read this and be inspired.
(4/11/2013 11:53:57 PM)
We Have a Beautiful Community!
Crown Heights is a great place to live, we have so many wonderful people here as this article demonstrates.
Enough with the negativity, we need to be reminded of the goodness and kindness that happens in Crown Heights.
Thank you to the author!
(4/11/2013 11:56:10 PM)
I'd add all the dedicated hatzala members to this list as well.
(4/11/2013 11:58:06 PM)
Never seen such an article, rarely does a good op-ed receive much comments or likes.. i hope this one will..pay it forward..
(4/12/2013 12:18:51 AM)
kol hakovod!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
beautifully written! everyone should read this it is soo true!!
(4/12/2013 12:26:05 AM)
And thank you to whoever wrote this:)
(4/12/2013 12:41:33 AM)
This is such a positive article! And sooo true! It is these kinds of acts that inspire ahavas yisrael among all Jews...
(4/12/2013 12:46:55 AM)
Thankless? Wrong word! Thankless is an adjective that describes the job all these people do - a thankless job, meaning not thanked for. Does not describe the person doing it
The point of the article is spot on, way overdue, but get the title right!
(4/12/2013 12:47:46 AM)
What about?
ALiyah, YAM...
(4/12/2013 1:21:44 AM)
Comment to number eight
Could you not at least have made your holy grammar lesson be a after thought instead of making your compliment an afterthought? Come on why pour cold water on such a beautiful warm article?If there are any mistakes in my comment ,it was meant to keep you happy ,so you will have more things to correct.Wait ,I have an idea.Perhaps you can add one more chessed organization to crown heights and offer free editing services?
(4/12/2013 3:24:24 AM)
Perfect picture!
We need to say a real yashar choyach to everyone who asks us for tzedaka. They are doing us a favor, not the other way around.
(4/12/2013 3:42:20 AM)
Hatzolah deserves an article of their own
Hatzolah that literally saves the world by saving lives multiple times daily, consistently and reliably on call 24/7 for anyone in need.
(4/12/2013 7:15:41 AM)
a thankful parent
members of the lubavitcher yeshiva committee, who dedicate their time and energy to ensure or teachers get paid. and that the Yeshiva has resources to continue operating.
(4/12/2013 7:35:18 AM)
Someone wrote a nice op-ed asking US to be nice, but he clearly doesn't get it. Hakoros HaTov just doesn't exist any more, it's rare to see anyone saying thank you or even rarer, demonstrating any appreciation. I'm alternately ROFL & shaking my head in sorrow at the author's beautiful intention but also at his naivete. What makes it even sadder is, he had to say it in the first place.
(4/12/2013 7:54:49 AM)
People helping people
Let's not forget the individuals making a difference
The Hatzala members
Yingy Bistritzky
Devora sheiner
Nachum Markowits
Shea Hecht
(4/12/2013 8:03:57 AM)
Thank you
Some of these organizations are paid business people while others are volunteer. Everyone deserves a thank you but there still is a difference.I would love spending my day helping people and getting paid for it.
(4/12/2013 8:07:30 AM)
agree with #3
(4/12/2013 8:11:24 AM)
while this list rocks i'm shocked you failed to mentiuon hatzala on top before all of these. they are at the door first and foremost selflessly - at least those that I know!
(4/12/2013 8:49:53 AM)
lets not forget our schools that give our kids a chinuch. they need to be at the front to be thanked and given $$$
(4/12/2013 9:07:09 AM)
What about misaskim as well always there for every one in ch
(4/12/2013 9:07:33 AM)
Highly doubt that Hatzolah was omitted intentionally . The author was trying to do a positive thing , why not try and go with it ?
Thank You to Hatzolah and to all that are there for all!
(4/12/2013 9:21:31 AM)
who runs countless programs to help our community, giving food for Yom Tov, counseling, poor and sick fund, helping off the drerech kids, the list goes on and on
if you need help for ANYTHING, turn to NCFJE and they WILL HELP!
(4/12/2013 9:23:46 AM)
thanks for this
they all definitely deserve recognition!
(4/12/2013 9:23:52 AM)
Empire Shtiebel
An Amazing Shul with dedicated people who ensure that there are Shiurim, and Farbrengen's, people to ask Sheilos to, non stop Minyanim, and when that is not enough put in more energy than they have to raise money for those who don't have enough for the Yom Tov.
(4/12/2013 9:28:14 AM)
an amazing article. People don't always realize what an amazing community we have here. I lived away for a while, and I came back loving it, and realizing that all the politics are on the websites and behind closed doors, and that the average person in Crown Heights is involved in making a living, taking care of their families, davening and learning and helping others! Great place to Be!
(4/12/2013 9:30:48 AM)
To #10
My comment was to COL, since the original title was "thank the thankless" , and I see it was a justified comment, since they changed it to a more appropriate title
That's all, I minimized the rest of my comment for brevity
Have a great day, and thank someone
(4/12/2013 10:22:45 AM)
camp fund
Thanking Avorham Eliezer Camp Fund who help are kids have a great summer
(4/12/2013 10:53:15 AM)
who was that fellow,on Union Street i believe, who used to help countless people each week. Forgot his name
(4/12/2013 11:03:37 AM)
rabbi Lider
you are the greatest. not big fanfare. always cheerful to your fellow man. keep it up.
(4/12/2013 11:21:53 AM)
yes #27
Truly a chesed. The Keren Avroham Elizezer Camp Fund.
(4/12/2013 12:38:27 PM)
in addition
let's not forget all of those that run real (free) gmachs: rivkie hafter (children's clothing), DL Sternberg, (clothing) dinie fraenkel (diapers), Mrs. Tiechtel (baby items), Shiffy Shimshoni (maternity clothes). feel free to add others
(4/12/2013 12:44:30 PM)
to shocked
I think I see hatzoloh listed here so just calm down - haztzolo is so obviously appreciated it goes without saying - the article must be for the ones that go nameless - what a nice read and how nice to see how many make this neighborhood a great place to live in. Not withstanding all the tzores we have too lol but u get the message I am sure.

So next time you see any of the above people give them a big hug!!!!
(4/12/2013 12:46:11 PM)
To 15 and 31
Ur right
(4/12/2013 1:04:49 PM)
Kol HaKavod

THANK YOU FOR EVERYTHING THAT YOU DO!!!!! The man who keeps Crown Heights running!!!!
(4/12/2013 1:07:00 PM)
Keren Alta Mina
What a special article.

Lets not forget Keren Alta Mina- of Rabbi Mrs Tiechtel who for over 22 years have been giving furniture to new babies. All in a quiet and unassuming way. No fanfare, just doing it.
(4/12/2013 1:11:20 PM)
Moshe feiglin
Is a rockstar of kindness!
(4/12/2013 1:54:50 PM)
thanks for writing
(4/12/2013 2:02:05 PM)
Vayakeil, Pekudei
We are like how it's said about each "instrument" of the Mishkan - having BOTH a unique role/power on its own AND a unique role/power when combined together with the other "instruments". Both roles/functions are necessary for the Mishkan to work.

Actually, it seems that a community is like a Mishkan - a makom for Hashem and for the people to do His will.

Thanks for your message - a very important one based on Torah... well, like everything :) Here's to the Rebbe's vision of doing more, and with each "drop" may we spillover the Kos Eliyahu b'Hashamyim, Moshiach now!
(4/12/2013 3:55:09 PM)
Not from Crown Heights...
I'm not from Crown Heights and I am immensely inspired by this article. I'm even more inspired by all the names added by the commenters. This is the perfect opportunity for everyone to come out and thank the un-thanked. Specific people or groups that quietly go about helping individuals and the community. Don't be shy! The more the merrier.
(4/12/2013 4:14:55 PM)
Spot On
This is a very inspiring article.

IMHO every shul should be a chabad house and help the ones in need that daven in their shul.

IMHO every shul should also adopt a shliach and connect with him and have him farbreng with the shul when he comes into town.

IMHO every shul should possibly have a ladies auxiliary to tend to the needs of the ladies and families whose husbands daven in that shul.
(4/13/2013 10:00:15 PM)
yad veezer
A very important organization was left out. For those of you that are not aware, this organization supplies hundreds of meals on a daily basis, to the needy in a very respectful manner, that is discrete and spares the families the humiliation of a public soup kitchen. Please give your appreciation to Rabbi Yitzchok Holzman for all his hard work.
(4/13/2013 11:56:19 PM)
Keren Alta Mina
Lets not forget the local org that has been providing hundreds of cribs, carriages, car seats and baby furniture to local families for the past 20 years. Rabbi and Mrs.. Tiechtel have given so much to those in need in our community, and always with a smile.
(4/14/2013 12:17:07 AM)
right on the button
It is very inspiring to see that crown heights, a community where everything is waiting at their fingertips, finally acknowledges it's community foundations. Living in a community where yiddishkeit is spread only a fraction, compared to Crown Heights, I feel as if Crown Heights has alot to thank.
This is very inspiring and touching. Your words really hit home!
(4/14/2013 2:27:52 AM)
thanks for posting
(4/14/2013 4:30:08 AM)
for food stamps and welfare
(4/15/2013 10:16:41 AM)
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