Jun 23, 2011
When a Child is a Victim

Rabbi Chaim Yitzchak Drizin on TheYeshiva.net tackles the most painful and critical question of how to talk to a child who has been victimized.

Family therapist Rabbi Chaim Yitzchak Drizin continues tonight a six week series on TheYeshiva.net about the horrors of "Child Abuse In Our Communities: The Untold Truth."

Tonight's lecture confronts the questions of how to deal with a child who has been abused. What do we tell him/her? How do we talk to them? What is it that they need from us at such a time? What should we not do?

The six week series tackles one of the most sensitive yet relevant issues facing our communities today: Child abuse. This six part series are covering the following issues: the affects of abuse, protecting and empowering our children, addressing the problem, talking to your child, and recovering from abuse.

"It is sickening to observe how abusers get away with destroying children's lives, and yet they get away with it because of the silence of community leaders," said Rabbi YY Jacobson, dean of TheYeshiva.net. "History will not forgive us for watching this travesty while remaining silent."

Rabbi Chaim Drizin, MA, LMFT, is a family therapist living in Florida who combines the wisdom of Torah with Modern Cognitive Pschology. In his Family Practice and as an Educational Consultant for numerous private schools, he has helped hundreds of people learn how to recover from abuse.

TheYeshiva.net is in the midst of presenting a weekly series on the Book of Ruth by Rabbi YY Jacobson, Laws of Shabbos by Rabbi Levi Wineberg, Likkutei Torah by Rabbi Yossi Paltiel, and Samach Vuv by Rabbi Shmuel Braun.

Please sign in to watch. You can download the video as an Mp3 and Mp4.


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1
so sad
Thank G-d this insidious plague is finally being recognized and brought to light. May we merit to completely eradicate this disease from our midst and bring healing to all those who need.
(6/24/2011 12:07:28 AM)
2
Thank you!
It was a refreshing change (for me) to listen about abuse from someone who has a human face and speech.
(6/24/2011 9:38:12 AM)
3
"dovid's" mother
as referred to in the jewish press last week as dovid, i am his mother, i found this video extremely touching and emotionally draining for me to just listen to it, let alone experience it and live through it with my son. my son was molested by a family relative since the age of five or six. we found out about it when he was 15, and DID EVERYTHING THAT C.I. DRIZIN spoke about in his video THE OPPOSITE. We pushed it under the rug like it didn't happen, didnt confront the abuser or his parents like we were told to, didn't listen or understand what our son was crying out to us about and just frankly didn't take at all seriously anything. He was a wonderful child with the potential to grow up and be anything he wanted to, but unfortunately today he is a very hurt young man of 22 that has been suffering for the past 7 years, with nightmares, anxieties, and anything else possible. Another horrible part of our story is the disbelief that we see in peoples
eyes , saying to us and thinking to themselves, impossible that never ever happened. Whatever the case listen to Drizins words, he explains it in a nutshell. The danger is losing your son REALLY. Please listen. For our son "DOVID" life is a constant battle. He batttles every morning getting up and going to work and even holding a job. Every part of his life is a struggle and i blame us as parents for not listening and not doing our job right.
(6/24/2011 6:34:06 PM)
4
can you confront the abuser now???
would it help him at all to confront the abuser now, even though its late.... that can help maybe even a little no?
(6/24/2011 7:31:57 PM)
5
for#3
my heart goes out to you. I hope you get therapy for yourself as well as your son so that maybe you can heal as well as your son. G-d bless you all
(6/24/2011 7:45:58 PM)
6
Response to my mother: #3
I loudly applaud my mother for having the courage to speak on such a public forum, it means so much to me to see her coming around and finally realize what the effects of 4 years of terrible abuse can cause.
I don't think she stated the case clearly though, I WAS a victim, I lived through terror; but now my life is better. I'm getting past it and I'm moving on, but I will forever be scarred.
The only thing I can ask of the community leaders here in Crown Heights is that they start ofically addressing this issue right away. Not closed door secret meetings, PUBLIC knowledge is what we need to stop this terrible tragedy from happening to children.
(6/25/2011 1:09:25 AM)
7
Thinker
I personally believe that there should be a requirement for schools to higher professionals to educate the children regarding this issue.

Knowledge is Power .

Empower the child.

THANK YOU DR. DRIZIN, FOR THE EDUCATION AND ADVICE .
(6/26/2011 9:52:38 AM)
8
a girl in ch
thank you so much for addressing this for once and for all. i was molested by someone who you'd never guess was capable of being such a monster. i am bh moving on but the fear is still constantly there.
hopefully, this will bring some awareness to our community and these people will be taken care of
(6/28/2011 1:19:48 PM)
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